Great advice ...But now....

[OamImrsNemo]

Okay so Ive used so much from here and everything you all put up here is great and has worked perfectly now...But now I am in a situation where I cant find anything posted about this.. So I am in a LTR like relationship with this girl and everything has been going great until couple weeks ago. This may be a bit jumbled so please forgive me. So her ex boyfriend invites her to his party to do ecstacy? She tells me about it I say no end of story. Well this exboyfriend was with her for 2 some years cheated on her multiple times, So my first question is why in the f^ck is she even talking to him? After what he put her through I dont even think she should befriend him and thats not just jealousy. So she been talking to him quite a bit latley... Couple nights ago We were having sex and she stops me, starts crying? I am like wtf? whats wrong she is starts going on this shpeal about how they were in this exact position and deja vu bull shi!t. So now Im really like wtf? Why would you even text him then bringing up all these emotions if you really wanna be with me right? So then I spent the night last night and I couldnt help but pry, I looked at her texts and there pretty weird he calls her some weird name and she calls him sugar? wtf? She has hung out with him without me even knowing? Or letting me knoW? Also she was planning on still going to the party and doing ecstacy except for her sister told her parents (she is 20 going to college lives with parents still) So she got busted thats the only reason that she didnt go.....Now weve been going out since late december also if that makes any difference.....


But guys what do you think about this situation...what should I do?

 

[cmr662]

GET. OUT. NOW. Don't look back, this won't end good for you.

 

[OamImrsNemo]

No I can do it...But Should I give her the option of not speaking with him...Be like listen you either stop talking and hanging out with him or were done? Something like that?

Thanks again for all the advice!

P.s. You dont think that Im overeacting either right?

 

[Kailex]

Run. NOW. As fast as you can.

She interrupted an INTIMATE moment with you because she was thinking of HIM. What do you think a woman would do if you stopped mid-sex to say: Oh, snap, I used to do it JUST like this with my last girlfriend?

That's a HUGE display of disrespect.

Oh god, you're LTR has only been going on for 3 months and you already have all this drama???

HELL NO.

Leave. The. Situation. NOW.

I would NEVER, EVER, NEVER stay with a woman that stopped in the middle of sex with me and admit to be thinking about her ex in the middle of it.

Eff. NO.

You are not overreacting. If anything, you are under-reacting.

What do you think this relationship is going to be like in a YEAR? This is just a fresh relationship... this is supposed to be the time period where she is lovey dovey and all happy to be your girlfriend and she's calling some jerkwad "sugar"???



Now stop... and re-read everything I just said, from the beginning... let it sink in... and then go and break it off.

 

[OamImrsNemo]

Okay bear with me. I'm Really trying to learn thats why Im asking these questions. Kailex I really beleive everything you say. But let ask you this and please! correct me if I am wrong. Women are very emotional. So can you blame her when I am f^cking her in the same room she lived with her ex for 2 years same bed just so happen to be an exact same position (weird haha) For her to have a flashback of him and be overwhelmed and start crying because she doesnt want that? Just curiouse.

Thanks guys

 

[starplayer]

No I can do it...But Should I give her the option of not speaking with him...Be like listen you either stop talking and hanging out with him or were done? Something like that?

Thanks again for all the advice!

P.s. You dont think that Im overeacting either right?

No, if you do that she'll just keep talking to him, but she'll just make sure she covers her tracks better next time so she won't get caught. Just get out.

You're not overreacting. She can't be trusted. She's not LTR material.

correct me if I am wrong. Women are very emotional. So can you blame her when I am f^cking her in the same room she lived with her ex for 2 years same bed just so happen to be an exact same position (weird haha) For her to have a flashback of him and be overwhelmed and start crying because she doesnt want that? Just curiouse.

Don't rationalize her behavior. You're letting emotion cloud your mind and make excuses for her behavior. It doesn't matter why she did it.

She's trouble and you gotta get rid of her. You'll regret it if you don't. I don't wanna see you posting on here in a few weeks about how you stayed with her and you walked in on her fvcking her ex at a party.

She might cry to you and try and persuade you to stay but don't let her manipulate you.

At least you found out what she's like early on. You dodged a bullet man.

Good luck.

 

[OamImrsNemo]

Alright Im gonna trust you guys with this one but I still want to say one more thing. I really feel in my gut that she wouldnt cheat on me how she acts looks at me acts around me and hangs out with me almost all the time feels as if she really likes me. I cant explain it but i really feel like she would never do that but I also dont get why she is doing what she is doing so I am going to trust you guys but leave you with that question. Why also would she keep me around even though it is just as easy to break up with me?

 

[2crudedudes]

Alright Im gonna trust you guys with this one but I still want to say one more thing. I really feel in my gut that she wouldnt cheat on me how she acts looks at me acts around me and hangs out with me almost all the time feels as if she really likes me. I cant explain it but i really feel like she would never do that but I also dont get why she is doing what she is doing so I am going to trust you guys but leave you with that question. Why also would she keep me around even though it is just as easy to break up with me?

Because that other guy is an a$$hole and you're not. She needs someone to run to when he hurts her. And you'll be there.

edit: for tha dollar$$

 

[starplayer]

Why also would she keep me around even though it is just as easy to break up with me?

Because, like most women, she wants to have her cake and eat it.

Do you spend money on her? If you do then there's your answer.

But maybe she just likes the comfort of having a boyfriend but still wants to fvck this other guy. Maybe she likes the attention you give her. Maybe she does really like you but she's a wh0re so she'll cheat on you anyway.

Who knows. Who cares. Don't go looking for closure from her and expect an honest answer to this question either.

 

[cmr662]

You are not overreacting. If anything, you are under-reacting.

Please read, and re-read the above. Listen, I don't care how much else there is to the story, or how much you think she wouldn't cheat on you. YOU MUST GET RID OF THIS GIRL NOW! Don't give her ultimatums, thats never healthy, and once it has gotten to that point anyway you should just give it up.

Please, for your sake, get out now. Good luck.

 

[Kailex]

Alright Im gonna trust you guys with this one but I still want to say one more thing. I really feel in my gut that she wouldnt cheat on me how she acts looks at me acts around me and hangs out with me almost all the time feels as if she really likes me. I cant explain it but i really feel like she would never do that but I also dont get why she is doing what she is doing so I am going to trust you guys but leave you with that question. Why also would she keep me around even though it is just as easy to break up with me?

Okay, all I've seen so far from you in this thread is a gross defense of her "character".

Why? Why are you so strung up on this one girl? It's only been three months and she's already calling some guy "sugar". WHY?

You're already looking at her cell phone calls. That's not a relationship, and as Dane Cook would say... that's a relationSH!T. You ALREADY don't trust her, but now you are telling us that she would never cheat on you? How can you be so sure? Are you around her 24/7?

And saying something to her about cutting it out... yeah, what are you going to say to her: That you snooped around on her phone without her permission and caught her calling some fvcker "sugar"? Are you kidding me?

I'm sorry to be blunt, but do you KNOW how QUICK she is going to turn that around on you and play the victim??? It's a LOSE-LOSE situation for you and the only way to WIN is to walk AWAY.

Then answer me this... how can you sit there and type: She'd never cheat on me...

And then say you already checked her phone. If for a SECOND you thought she wouldn't cheat on you, then why the lack of trust??? You are contradicting yourself here, son.

And do you think cheating is just "fvcking"? It starts in the mind, then works its way into innocent little texts, and then phone calls, and then that one night you are out with your buds, she decides she wants to go somewhere on her own and meet up with this guy... and oops, all of a sudden her tongue is down his throat...

ALL of that is CHEATING and at no point did she ever have a penis inserted in her. You are fighting a losing battle. Like I said before, it's only been THREE months and you already have trust issues.

And as to the why she is keeping you around?
Because you are the safe bet. Women will swing onto branches but they hold their hand firmly on the original branch. You are a safety net. You are the guy she can go back to if that other guy doesn't pan out.

It's an ex. He already stirs up emotions in her. It's not good news for you. You will forever have in the back of your mind that she will be talking to this guy.

Please... PLEASE, don't be like every other guy and ignore us. I see you headed down a terrible road if you stay with her. It will NOT end up good. I promise you this. She is NOT the one for you. Move on.

And again... a woman that is fvcking me... better be fvcking me and not thinking of some other dude, let alone ADMIT to it mid-sex. Women are emotional, but you are supposed to be logical. You're supposed to say: Fvck, this ISNT right. She SHOULDN'T be thinking about this stuff while ME and HER are having sex.

Yes... again, she was thinking about HIM while your sausage was in her strudel.

Give me another illogical reason WHY you SHOULDN'T drop him?

 

[sodbuster]

FB material only-start looking for a better one. IF you cheat on her,she may fall in love with you too. I mean she's still in love with him,thinking about sex with him[while you are screwing her]. She either isn't over him or has low self esteem and thinks she deserves to be cheated on. No way she's dateable for more than another 2 weeks while you find replacement sex

How many women have you been with? I've never had one say"I've been in this position with my ex" Anybody else have it happen? And you are DEFENDING her? saying she won't cheat?She was going to sneak out and do E with him. Want to bet they weren't going to have sex?

 

[OamImrsNemo]

Thank you guys! I am glad you were all blunt with me I am being afc right now and defending her I am reading what I said and realizing how fvcking stupid I am. I shouldnt have to defend her for her own actions that she caused and especially not after 3 months. All my **** is totally illogical and I am glad the way all of you have stated it and how cheating does start in the mind. I really appreciate it! I Think I was starting to get oneitis so I dont think FB is an option for me, I think a good clean dumping will be what I need to do. Thank you guys for all the advice and help you saved me a hell of alot of pain further down the road..

Thanks!