Good signals, rejection?

[karusel]

Guys I need your help with this one... There's a girl that I've sort of known for quite some time, but we never really had a real talk until a month ago. She's a deejay and I go to this place where she's working on a weekly basis, so each time I approach and we talk a little. Today she pretty obviously invited me to some other club where she would work a little later she said when she'd finish, so I got there had a really nice chat, I invited her out _but_ she said she'd be busy until New Year. Uh-huh. She added, we'd meet after that anyway, (I understood it that we'd kind of set a date then) I gather in that place she regularly works at.

Now, I do believe she is busy, but if she really cared, wouldn't she give me her phone number? I didn''t ask her for it since I felt that would be too pushy. Was that a common polite rejection? If it was, I don't understand those good signals she was giving off... I do believe I have a good judgement about that, though... I feel that if asking her out next time I see her would be weak, but what if she doesn't suggest a date herself? Gah.. I'm puzzled.

 

[Omega]

Originally posted by karusel
Guys I need your help with this one... There's a girl that I've sort of known for quite some time, but we never really had a real talk until a month ago. She's a deejay and I go to this place where she's working on a weekly basis, so each time I approach and we talk a little. Today she pretty obviously invited me to some other club where she would work a little later she said when she'd finish, so I got there had a really nice chat, I invited her out _but_ she said she'd be busy until New Year. Uh-huh. She added, we'd meet after that anyway, (I understood it that we'd kind of set a date then) I gather in that place she regularly works at.

Now, I do believe she is busy, but if she really cared, wouldn't she give me her phone number? I didn''t ask her for it since I felt that would be too pushy. Was that a common polite rejection? If it was, I don't understand those good signals she was giving off... I do believe I have a good judgement about that, though... I feel that if asking her out next time I see her would be weak, but what if she doesn't suggest a date herself? Gah.. I'm puzzled.

Sounds like a rejection

But, stick your girls like glue

 

[becker]

You just need to be a little more aggressive. It's like solving a mystery. The answer won't just jump into your arms. You need to find it. It's too presumptuous to just assume all this stuff based on body language and signals, because those to me are all pretty inaccurate measures unless it's extremely obvious, such as if she's all over you and will agree automatically to doing something with you. If she's all wishy-washy, then that's when you have to be a little more assertive and just sort of give her a time to meet you, or else you're not sure if you'll be able to do it. If she isn't that interested, then she won't agree to your ultimatum.

 

[karusel]

Thanx for the tips! I think I'll go with the ultimatum and if it's not working I'll just put her in the friends drawer.

 

[Aramas]

Ultimatums are bad, Hmm-kay?

 

[Big Pappy]

It may depend on what type of DJ she is. If she works a club, the more people that are there because of her, the more "extra" she cna justify asking for. If she's a DJ for a radio station, she's always going to be very friendly, as she's representing the station that she works for.

Asking her for her phone number is not pushy. However, she is busy. You should get busy as well.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Just by the way you described the situation, I can tell you that your too much of an AFC around her. You didn't ask for her number because you felt it would be "too pushy??" WTF is that all about!! An Alpha male goes for what he wants. He makes no regrets for his intentions. You should kill the nice guy routine and be a Don Juan.



PIMP