going to do BOOT CAMP after 2 year dry spell, need some serious accountability

wiggamonkey

Don Juan
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So it's been over two years since I've had a girlfriend, or even dated a women, period. sure, there have been a couple isolated dates. but nothing more.

and i'm sick of it!!! what's worse is that i am too chickensh*t to do anything aobut it.

Daily I find myself repeating inspirational mantras to myself (like "do i want to look back at my life regretting missed opportunities?"), only to cower back at the last second because I just cannot seem to overcome my fear of rejection. When it comes down to it, I just have near-zero confidence when it comes to approaching women.

That is why I need to engage in some no-nonsense, confidence-building activity to make me help myself.

So, I am assigning myself the Don Juan Boot Camp, using the "1 post-a-week" criteria as an accountability tactic. Anyone who wants to reserves the right to b*tch at me for not following through!

Goodbye singleness pity-partying. Goodbye comfort zone! I am going to get some DATES. Wish me luck.
 

Sun Tzu

Don Juan
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Aug 19, 2006
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Good luck on your journey. Keep us posted and we'll be glad to help.
 

fireguy

Don Juan
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Keep a daily journal. If your gona post just once a week, then we want details.
 

wiggamonkey

Don Juan
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4 days later...

So I've really been trying to do this.

It has been a little harder than I've thought, although I'm trying. I must admit I have not finished the assignment. I've only had 4 days though, and will finish it off this week.

I'd say I've got around 20 "hellos" to strangers. I find the easiest ones are when someone's at their job, like when I'm at the gym and someone is at the customer service desk.

Sometimes instead of making an exact "hello" I'll just say something small-talkish. Like this girl was reading a book upon the fence over by my school's music building, so I smiled at her and said "nice reading spot" playfully.

The ballsiest move I've made was walking alongside a girl at the gym and asking her if I could read the back of her shirt (don't laugh! that is a big move for me). Her shirt had a lengthy quote, so although it was out of the blue it was not too bizarre of me. She politely let me read it, after which we had a very brief small-talk conversation (I asked her if she was from Israel since it was a Martin Luther King quote about Israeli peace), ending in awkward silence as we continued to our locker rooms.

I've got to admit that I've done the "hello" thing to more guys than girls, and I'm going to take care of that. It is HARD though!!!

Thankfully I've only had one biatch so far. I tried to begin a conversation with her to which she just said "yep" and looked away.

Already I am beginning to feel more confident about this. The cool thing is that I've gone to a couple parties, and going up and approaching girls in THIS context has actually become a little easier... I guess by putting myself out of my comfort zone by saying "hello" and small-talking girls in venues that don't really lend themselves to flirtation makes it a little easier to do so at parties and places where it's expected. I'm very grateful that I have a structured program to help me do something about this. I'll let you guys know more soon! Thanks
 
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