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Girlfriend still talks with ex who has strong feelings for her:

Chromeo

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girls dont like you to sit them down for a serious discussion dude. But they love to sit their aloof boyfriends down for them.

girls like to construct the drama, not deal with yours.
 

vatoloco

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-Heaven Or Hell- said:
I just hope that we're not also just only looking at it from my perspective.. because what about her feelings too?
You mean the ones about she wanting to fvck her ex? Because deep down, that's what she really wants. ;)

I'm not going to tell you what to do as it's clearly obvious that you're blind to reason due to the oneitis that you have for this girl. However, let me leave you with a question: If she does end up being "the one," will this situation be in the back of your mind whenever she's out of your sight?

;)
 

-Heaven Or Hell-

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Chromeo said:
girls dont like you to sit them down for a serious discussion dude. But they love to sit their aloof boyfriends down for them.

girls like to construct the drama, not deal with yours.
That's a good point. Girls don't like that, but WOMEN do, because they are mature enough to comprehend the meaning of a relationship being a team, working together, listening to each other and being considerate to one another.. I've dealt with lots of girls in the past, and the woman I am with now is very far from having an immature mindset.. thankfully.

@ vatoloco:

You mean the ones about she wanting to fvck her ex? Because deep down, that's what she really wants.

I'm not going to tell you what to do as it's clearly obvious that you're blind to reason due to the oneitis that you have for this girl. However, let me leave you with a question: If she does end up being "the one," will this situation be in the back of your mind whenever she's out of your sight?
She doesn't wanna sleep with her ex, she's a very conservative type of woman with her head on straight, it would be totally out of character for her to have that type of mindset, I dont think you know enough about her to jump to that conclusion.

That said, I trust her 100%, and she regularly goes out with her friends, I have never had a feeling of being insecure, I'm really not like that at all. But the situation with her & her ex is different. Given her background/past with him, together with the way he feels about her currently, is what bothers me. I just think that its not right for her to be speaking with him regularly given the way he feels about her, and the fact that their relationship ended based on distance and she admitted that he was a great bf etc.. so I think that she should be wanting to create distance between the two of them (emotionally) but she isn't putting much effort into doing that, which is to me, like her leaving the door slightly open(him) while opening a new door (me), instead of shutting and locking the door before opening a new one. If that makes sense?
 

5string

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-Heaven Or Hell- said:
This is exactly how I feel about the situation, and hopefully by the end of the weekend she will also see things from this perspective.

I just hope that we're not also just only looking at it from my perspective.. because what about her feelings too? I mean fact remains she still likes the person he is and likes talking to him (innocent mindset), and if that is the case I also feel bad by influencing her / making her feel bad if she doesn't cut things off with him. Maybe I should just forget about this and hopefully in time he will find someone else and they will drift naturally? God I'm so confused right now. :crazy:
Know this. There very few "innocent" women. They all have an agenda and reasons why they do the things they do. Many times they don't even know why, and are unable to explain it to themselves let alone others. Be careful brother. Keep us posted as to what happens. I'll be interested to see how this turns out.
 

DJjazzyJeff

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-Heaven Or Hell- said:
I know myself pretty well and what I look for in a woman, and trust me, even though I have only known her for under a year (and dated her for just over 5 months now) I know that she has all the aspects of a woman / potential wife / potential mother, that I look for. I know everything about her, and I havn't found out much faults in her, there are always going to be the small faults, with every woman, but her faults are ones I can live and deal with.
After 5 months the only thing you have seen is her "representative". Everything that you are seeing is her making her best effort to hide her flaws. You will generally see the real and total package after about 2 years; good and bad. That's why her already exhibiting in red flags should have you looking for back up plans.

That being said, I have been in your situation before and will give you advice that doesn't include move on or forget about her, because you are at a point where you aren't willing to do that. Everything women do is dependent on their emotional attachment to you. Based on what you say I would say that your g/f has an interest you, but she is definitely not head over heels for you. At least that's what I hope. This may sound counterintuitive, but the less interest a woman has while in a LTR the more leeway you can give her. If a woman has low interest level, she can't be expected to be loyal, honest, or any other quality we should look for in a long term relationship. On the other hand if she has high interest level and is exhibiting negative behavior then you know that you have a girl that you will never be able to trust or have a fulfilling relationship with regardless of circumstances.

So what can you do? I am not sure how you told her it bothers you, but I would tell her verbatim "I think it's disrespectful that you are talking to a previous love interest and I know you would feel the same if the tables were turned." I would leave it at that and not go into any further conversation about it. After that, you need to make an effort to raise her emotional connection to you by taking her on action dates, exhibiting confidence, being fun, and minimizing any negative interactions you have with her. Ignore her talking to the other guy and gauge how she responds to you and the new connection you're building. In a couple of weeks if this girl is worth anything she will say "hey, I quit talking to x". If not then you know regardless of how this girl feels about you emotionally she has a bad personality/character for an LTR. Another warning, if she does this, expect her to talk to this guy or other guys anytime her level is waning. Basically, to make it work you will have to keep her head over heels in love with you for as long as you are together. It's exhausting, but can be done.

I've done this with 2 girls before and this is exactly how it worked. Full disclosure: both of those relationships ended anyway due to character flaws. Good luck!
 

-Heaven Or Hell-

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DJjazzyJeff said:
After 5 months the only thing you have seen is her "representative". Everything that you are seeing is her making her best effort to hide her flaws. You will generally see the real and total package after about 2 years; good and bad. That's why her already exhibiting in red flags should have you looking for back up plans.

That being said, I have been in your situation before and will give you advice that doesn't include move on or forget about her, because you are at a point where you aren't willing to do that. Everything women do is dependent on their emotional attachment to you. Based on what you say I would say that your g/f has an interest you, but she is definitely not head over heels for you. At least that's what I hope. This may sound counterintuitive, but the less interest a woman has while in a LTR the more leeway you can give her. If a woman has low interest level, she can't be expected to be loyal, honest, or any other quality we should look for in a long term relationship. On the other hand if she has high interest level and is exhibiting negative behavior then you know that you have a girl that you will never be able to trust or have a fulfilling relationship with regardless of circumstances.

So what can you do? I am not sure how you told her it bothers you, but I would tell her verbatim "I think it's disrespectful that you are talking to a previous love interest and I know you would feel the same if the tables were turned." I would leave it at that and not go into any further conversation about it. After that, you need to make an effort to raise her emotional connection to you by taking her on action dates, exhibiting confidence, being fun, and minimizing any negative interactions you have with her. Ignore her talking to the other guy and gauge how she responds to you and the new connection you're building. In a couple of weeks if this girl is worth anything she will say "hey, I quit talking to x". If not then you know regardless of how this girl feels about you emotionally she has a bad personality/character for an LTR. Another warning, if she does this, expect her to talk to this guy or other guys anytime her level is waning. Basically, to make it work you will have to keep her head over heels in love with you for as long as you are together. It's exhausting, but can be done.

I've done this with 2 girls before and this is exactly how it worked. Full disclosure: both of those relationships ended anyway due to character flaws. Good luck!
Thank you for taking the time to reply:

I wouldnt call what she is doing a red flag 9due to her personality) - I know that her reasons for keeping in contact with her ex are innocent, the problem is that she doesn't realize its wrong and in the bigger picture damaging both to me and her ex.

Its damaging to me because as you stated its disrespectful and hurtful on some level that she is speaking to an ex that still has strong feelings for her. It just doesn't feel right.

Its damaging to him because weather she knows it or not, she isn't letting him move on with his life (emotionally) because of the constant contact.

And it could potentially be damaging to her because she is leaving room for her emotions not to disappear fully, thus opening the "door" of temptation/emotion to sneak in at some point in the future.

All the gestures and the time we spend together, and especially the emotional connection we have really make me feel and believe that she is genuinely in love with me and committed to me 100%, but like I said, she isn't perfect, nobody is.

We already go on action dates and do a lot of things/activities together, we are very much involved in each others lives, and we both make each other very happy.

I have never felt pressure to keep her in love, I'm just myself, and she is too, its kinda strange but we were so comfortable with one another even after only a month of knowing each other, almost like we knew each other already on a spiritual level (and no I' not being sobby here), we're very open with one another about everything, but this subject/issue is one that is a little tricky for me because I don't know how to enlighten her as to how I see things regarding her ex, without coming across as being insecure and/or possessive.

Anyways, I'll have to see how things go over the weekend (or possibly tonight, she just sent me a text saying she wants to see me later)

@ 5string:

Thanks for the continual support I appreciate it, I'll be sure to keep you posted :up:
 

Brighty

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Reading your posts I'm getting the vibe that you sound like you've subconsciously forfeited the power in the relationship, which is probably why she thinks she can get away with doing really ****ty behavior like this. And apparently she can according to you.

Well, whatever happens, let us know one way or the other.
 

Kailex

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-Heaven Or Hell- said:
She doesn't wanna sleep with her ex, she's a very conservative type of woman with her head on straight, it would be totally out of character for her to have that type of mindset, I dont think you know enough about her to jump to that conclusion.
Game. Set. Match.
She wins.


Sorry, but you used another analogy and called yourselves "A TEAM".
Do you know what she's acting like... even if you don't want to recognize it:

A player on a team that's flirting with free agency.

The only saving grace in all of this is that he is FAR, FAR AWAY.
But what if he were a lot closer. Would you still feel the same about this "angel"?

As far as you are concerned, she could be cheating on you emotionally already. What's stopping her from typing to him and being flirty? Because she's "conservative"??? You are in for a RUDE AWAKENING brother... even the most conservative woman will have her gina tingle without you really realizing it. For all you know, she could be spending quality time with her vibrator thinking about him.

Conservative.

What a joke.

Everytime I hear a "man" say: conservative, sweet, shy, etc...

All I see is a misguided fool who doesn't know any better yet.
All I've seen so far is a "man" in the palm of a virgin. She holds the frame. Sorry, but it's true.
 

vatoloco

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My good H&H, I'm gonna have to call you out on this:

-Heaven Or Hell- said:
I trust her 100%
-Heaven Or Hell- said:
It just doesn't feel right.
Which one is it?

;)

Only you can decide when you'll stop lying to yourself. But, if you were 100% sure, would you be posting here?

You don't trust this girl 100% and are rationalizing her behavior.

Okay, I'm done here. Good luck to you my man.
 

Ease

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This guy is beyond help.

Dont blame her for when she dumps you buddy, you did this to yourself.

He's thinking about marrying the girl, while she's already bored with him and flirting around with her ex. Open your eyes buddy, the ex is the least of your worries. She will leave you for someone else, and it wont even be the ex.

Signs of disinterest and problems in your relationship are when you reasess and evaluate where you stand. Your head is so far up your own ass that you dont even see the problem.

Ill tell you what i think so you can rationalize and deny it:

When your girlfriend starts acting up, the last thing you do is show how insecure and needy you are.
 

Heaven or Hell

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hahaha, wow.. some of you guys here are unbelievable.. you are very pessimistic and negative, I wouldn't be surprised if you guys talking all this sh!t are are single. The way in which you jump to conclusions about a woman / situation is pathetic at the very least.

Anyways, for those of you who have been supportive and given me constructive feedback, here is the update after I spoke with her about this issue:

I brought up the issue, the fact that it made me feel awkward, and the potential worries I had of them still speaking regularly while he still has feelings for her. She promptly told me that if it made me feel awkward that she would delete him and that I am the only guy that matters to her. We then went on to have an amazing night together, stayed up until 7am messing around and doing what couples do.

This morning before I dropped her off, in the car, I told her that she could still speak to him if she wanted to, because I know that she is in the right mindset and that she is 100% dedicated and committed to me. She then told me that she would prefer not to because she can't stand the thought of hurting me or me not being comfortable with it, and that she won't talk to him anymore and cut him out. We stayed in the car outside her house for a further 10 minutes with her clinging onto me and we just pretty much expressed to each other how much we mean to one another. Not even 5 minutes after I dropped her off I got a text from her saying that she loves me so much blah blah... so yeah.. I'm happy I got this issue off my chest with her, and am once again surprisingly impressed with her consideration and maturity about things.

Thanks again to 5string & others who were supportive of me and my predicament. I'll be sending wedding invitations in due course :p (yes that was a joke... for now :rockon: )

To all you pessimists that replied to this thread - Trusting a woman 100% is sometimes the best thing you can ever do, even if it means risking getting your heart broken. If you do something and commit to something, then you do it 100%, and in the long run you will always stand out in her mind.

My reasoning for this mindset is as follows:

No normal guy is willing to trust 100% and give 100%, most guys are too busy looking at the rules and other bullsh!t... but in the bigger picture, even if you do end up getting dumped, when she experiences other guys, and then look back at how sincere and genuine and trusting you were, they will always know that they had the best guy and they let him go.. and a mature woman that knows better will acknowledge these qualities in a guy.

I was having a discussion with a friend the other day... he said that he would never let his gf go to a mutual friend's party with 2 other mutual guys friends if he wasn't with her because he wouldn't trust her enough.. and I said that I would be fine with it, because I do trust her 100%, and I know that I make her happy and I know what I have to offer, and I'm trusting that she knows and feels it too. If I am in this relationship, then I am in it 100%, which means I trust her 100%, so if she trusts herself to be able to be in that type of environment while being 100% faithful and loyal to me, then I trust her judgment. If she ends up being unfaithful then she'll be doing me a favor by not wasting any more of my time.

maybe I'm weird/unique in some aspects of how I perceive a relationship, and love, but I know a good woman when I see one, I have had plenty opportunities in the past to get into relationships with women who I simply shook off, I have been single for over 5 years now (by choice) but when I met this woman she fitted into what I was looking for in a woman perfectly. She's not a perfect human being, but she's perfect for what I look for in a woman, and in the bigger picture she makes me happy, satisfied, and fulfilled all at the same time.

I have confidence in myself as a partner, I know that I have a lot to offer, if what I have to offer does not accommodate the person she is and her own individual preferences, then she is free to go and do whatever she wants. Every day when she wakes up, she chooses to be with me, its not something I take for granted, and if she wakes up every day and chooses that I am the one she wants to be with and share her life with, then that tells me that I must be doing something right.. or perhaps a lot of things right, and visa versa.. change is a decision away, and we need to realize that yes, there are a lot of women out there that may use guys, cheat, have hidden agenda's, be deceiving, be two faced, be users, be selfish, self centered, egocentric, inconsiderate, etc... But then we also need to realize there are a lot of women who AREN'T all/any of those things. And that is what makes the diamond stand out from the worthless rocks & stones. I've been in the dating world and relationships world for over 12 years now, and I must admit some women have been able to disguise themselves as a diamond pretty well, in the start... but as time progresses the mask comes off gradually, until the real face is revealed.

I have known this woman for 3 and a half years now (though I only became really friendly with her about a year ago), but I have known the type of person she is, and everything about her has always been consistent and genuine, I have never ever caught her out on a lie, and she has always stayed true to herself and her beliefs. I am too very similar to her in so many ways, which is what played a big role in my initial attraction to her.

@ vatoloco

I do trust her 100%, but that does not change the fact that it didin't feel right that a guy that has strong feelings for my gf was still speaking to her regularly. But after speaking to her about it, and really putting some hard thought into it, I have come to realize, that realistically, she is 100% over him, and its just a matter of time until he finds himself another woman and move on. In the bigger picture, he will probably be happily married in 5..10..20 years from now.. and hopefully so will I.. I don't think that she would be able to feel so strongly about me and reflect that with her actions (not just say it) if she wasn't 100% committed to me... and hypothetically if she were to leave me for him then at least I did the right thing and gave it 100% of myself and my trust.

So far my way of handling things has worked pretty well for me, and not to blow my own whistle, but I have never been dumped in my life, I have always been the one doing the dumping because I came to a point where I felt like we were not on the same page, or that my ex's would be possessive/insecure/immature(immature was the most common one)/etc... its the worst feeling in the world knowing that you're breaking the heart of someone you still care about a lot on some level, but its better than wasting both our time on something that I know I have tried everything and still doesn't work/feel right/the same etc. The more experience i've had with women the more picky I would get with my expectations and what I look for and what I DON'T look for in a woman. it came to a point where my close friends were telling me that I was wishful thinking and that there isn't such a woman out there in this day & age.. I even started to believe them on some level and even considered (and was okay with) staying single/ bachelor for the rest of my life.. but then I met this lady, and until today she continues to surprise and impress me.

Its hard to express an intimate connection / relationship over a forum accurately, but I want you guys to all keep in mind that every single relationship is different, just like every single human being is their own different unique individual. In many cases some of the negative / pessimistic responses I got her might ring true, but in this case it simply isn't so, and believe it or not, she may just be "the one" for me... We will all get to a point in our lives where we will hopefully meet that "one" for us, some of us might find her at 25, some at 30, some at 40 or even older... but in my case maybe I have found her at this point in my life (being 28), and if its not, then its not... but it just might be... :)
 

jonwon

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H&H you make for too many excuses for your 5 month relationship with a woman.

You my friend are going to get a baptism in fire!

I have no idea why anyone will want to give you advice, its clear you dont want it and think you dont need it. The actual REAL advice you receive you come out with Ad-Homen attacks.

That shi*ts nots cool, people here take time out to reply to you, they are trying to help you, not destroy you and you reply to them like they have issues?

Your a train wreck, enjoy the ride.

Your intimancy posturing is fuc*ing laughtable, seriously, no offence, but I suggest you save what you wrote and come back to it, in 6months and give yourself a bitc*-slap.

Man your really gone, your in a zone that no one can penetrate, I feel sorry for you actually, I know whats coming eventually. And all you can do is posture and write like your trying for the next mills and boons novel. Seriously your girl isn't writing about connections and shi* like you are, she is out with her EX -

You've known this girl 5 months, you dont even know this woman yet - That shi* takes years.

You dont trust this chick otherwise you wouldn't take the time to mind fuc* yourself on this forum - there is a reason you dont trust her, but - Whats the point, your the guy who needs to learn the hard way.
 

Heaven or Hell

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jonwon said:
H&H you make for too many excuses for your 5 month relationship with a woman.

You my friend are going to get a baptism in fire!

I have no idea why anyone will want to give you advice, its clear you dont want it and think you dont need it. The actual REAL advice you receive you come out with Ad-Homen attacks.

That shi*ts nots cool, people here take time out to reply to you, they are trying to help you, not destroy you and you reply to them like they have issues?

Your a train wreck, enjoy the ride.

Your intimancy posturing is fuc*ing laughtable, seriously, no offence, but I suggest you save what you wrote and come back to it, in 6months and give yourself a bitc*-slap.

Man your really gone, your in a zone that no one can penetrate, I feel sorry for you actually, I know whats coming eventually. And all you can do is posture and write like your trying for the next mills and boons novel. Seriously your girl isn't writing about connections and shi* like you are, she is out with her EX -

You've known this girl 5 months, you dont even know this woman yet - That shi* takes years.

You dont trust this chick otherwise you wouldn't take the time to mind fuc* yourself on this forum - there is a reason you dont trust her, but - Whats the point, your the guy who needs to learn the hard way.
Clearly you havn't read all my posts through if this is the perception you have of me :) And trust me, I have taken everything that has been said here to heart, but what do you expect me to do? Dump her now? hahaha... bro, don't jump to conclusions and don't put words into my mouth.

I guess time will reveal all... so lets just wait and see how things unfold...
 

jonwon

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Heaven or Hell said:
Clearly you havn't read all my posts through if this is the perception you have of me :) And trust me, I have taken everything that has been said here to heart, but what do you expect me to do? Dump her now? hahaha... bro, don't jump to conclusions and don't put words into my mouth.

I guess time will reveal all... so lets just wait and see how things unfold...
You actually want some advice.

Here you go:

Back off from this chick and observe from a distance, your far too emotionally invested in this woman and she isn't concurent with a girl your fantazing about.

But you wont, I know how this will play out.

What we have is you in a ring, in the middle, in one corner is SS, in the other corner your GF - You'll take your GF everytime, because you have developed a serious unhealthy projection of her and your belief system is only adding to your problems.

SS wont even be a factor, if anything you laugh at the pathetic advice you had whilst you live in blissful ignorance of your GF exploits, ignore her meeting or in contact with the EX - Excuse her behaviour, romantacise about the most mundane shi*, picuture her in the best light possible - Until BAM - she actually shows you her true colors in such a way you cant make excuses for her anymore - What that will be depends on your tolerance and your infactuation with this 5 month old relationship.

The point is rather simple your interest in this chick is through the roof, hers on the other hand, not so -
i.e your more invested in this so called relationship then she is, your more interested than she is -

Your type is a dime a dozen, your story played out many times.

I know what will happen, like I know what I am having for lunch. Its not a mystery.

Back off from this chick, stop thinking of marriage and children and all that other cra*, you've known her 5 months, even if she was the best chick on the planet 5 months is far too soon for the type of projection you have for a this woman - a serious unhealthy belief system - The chick is faulty but in fairness your painful to read.
 

Heaven or Hell

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jonwon said:
You actually want some advice.

Here you go:

Back off from this chick and observe from a distance, your far too emotionally invested in this woman and she isn't concurent with a girl your fantazing about.

But you wont, I know how this will play out.

What we have is you in a ring, in the middle, in one corner is SS, in the other corner your GF - You'll take your GF everytime, because you have developed a serious unhealthy projection of her and your belief system is only adding to your problems.

SS wont even be a factor, if anything you laugh at the pathetic advice you had whilst you live in blissful ignorance of your GF exploits, ignore her meeting or in contact with the EX - Excuse her behaviour, romantacise about the most mundane shi*, picuture her in the best light possible - Until BAM - she actually shows you her true colors in such a way you cant make excuses for her anymore - What that will be depends on your tolerance and your infactuation with this 5 month old relationship.

The point is rather simple your interest in this chick is through the roof, hers on the other hand, not so -
i.e your more invested in this so called relationship then she is, your more interested than she is -

Your type is a dime a dozen, your story played out many times.

I know what will happen, like I know what I am having for lunch. Its not a mystery.

Back off from this chick, stop thinking of marriage and children and all that other cra*, you've known her 5 months, even if she was the best chick on the planet 5 months is far too soon for the type of projection you have for a this woman - a serious unhealthy belief system - The chick is faulty but in fairness your painful to read.
1) I have known this chick (and observed her from a distance) for over 3 years.

2) The way I perceive and envision her in my head is purely based on what she has thus far, proven to me in many ways, words, actions, gestures, and the time we spend together.

3) I do not ignore her "flaws", I am well aware of them, but they don;t come close to her "pro's" and I'm realistic regarding my expectations of her, I don't expect her to be perfect, I don't expect her never to make bad decisions or mistakes, I probably will too. But those things are things I can deal with, together with her, which is how a couple are meant to deal with each other's flaws/bad points.

4) We might only be dating for 5 months, but we became really friendly / close for a whole year before that, and again, I've known her and viewed her from a distance for over 3 years, and like I mentioned before, she has always been consistent, sincere and genuine, weather it be her morals, her outlook on life, or her general way of thinking.

5) You say she's not interested in me as much as I am interested in her? On what grounds do you base this conclusion? Just by looking at your attitude towards this relationship, calling it a "so called relationship" shows me that you're being irrationally negative and jumping to conclusions left right & center. And just for the record, actions-wise, she's done / invested even more than I have in this relationship, weather it be presents, gestures, leaving me notes all the time, random texts, and many other gestures that I have mentioned in my previous posts (that you probably never took the time to read through properly) .. So this so called point that you're trying to make is completely unrealistic and very far from the truth.

6) Unless you are saying that it is impossible for her to be talking to her ex with an innocent and faithful mindset, then you have no grounds to jump to any conclusions. If it doesn't bother me then why doesn't it bother you? I can understand that perhaps you might think that because I am so emotionally involved with her that I am not thinking rationally about this, but I can assure you that I am. Before I started this thread I'll admit I was uneasy, but after putting a lot of thought into it and putting things into perspective, it really doesn't bother me anymore, especially after last night.

If I'm wrong about this woman then I will learn the hard way and you would have been right... But If I'm right, then I would hope that you would be happy and supportive of me. I appreciate all opinions and advise, you said what you had to say, now allow me to do with it what I think is best, without holding it against me if I choose not to agree with everything you have said.

Like I've said, my mindset and way of dealing with relationships has always left women respecting and appreciating me and what i have to offer, even my ex's that I still speak to from time to time (so now does this make me bad or not relationship material cause i still speak to my ex's just as friends? *sigh*) all say to me that they regret doing what they did, or acting the way they did, and telling me that any woman is lucky to have me in their lives... and I'm not trying to blow my own whistle here, but I feel the need to defend my mindset here and the way in which I choose to handle myself/my mindset regarding relationships, women, love, and life as a whole.

So... whats for lunch? :rolleyes:
 

5string

Master Don Juan
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HH. Clearly you are going to do what you are going to do. That's cool. Although my wife has some issues, infidelity has never been one of them. The fact is, she is with me. She knows where the door to the house is and where the bedroom is. Thus, I will trust her 100% until she proves me wrong. I have talked about this before. Every man has a little guy sitting on his shoulder, ever vigilent, looking for any sign that something may be out of the ordinary. Listen to that little guy on your shoulder when he senses something may be amiss. He (your gut), is the only person you can truly trust 100% without question. Listen to what I have just said. There may be a lesson here which you will soon learn, one way or another. Keep us posted.
 
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WhitePimp

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Why do some dudes even come on here asking for advice?

Go to a woman's forum and they'll give you the advice you want to hear.
 

In$tinct

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Reading through this thread seriously made me think DANGER WILL ROBINSON! So, the relationship didn’t end because a loss of attraction, interest, bad feelings… etc. And this clown doesn’t think there is anything going on? WOW

All I can say is that she is keeping this “orbiter” around for a reason… and it has nothing to do with just someone to chat with online. (Assuming that is the only place they chat, is a joke by itself)

The OP better hope damn well that her EX, if we should even call him that, (I think he is her LDR.) Stays far, far away from her. Because if he happened to move back to the states, he is going to take back what sounds to be rightfully his.

Another thing I found funny, like everyone else that didn’t start this thread, is the “I trust her 100%”. So, much so that I googled relationship sites, posted my limit the first day, and had to create another account. Yes, he is a puppet, and she is his master. She could have told him “I only talk to XXX because the world is supposed to end in 2012 anyway” and OP would have just replied, “Of course, I figured that was it”.

Notice I didn’t even respond to the OP… He already knows all the answers, but decided to waste many experienced members time, when they could have been helping others that were actually seeking guidance.
 

terran2k

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man, why'd you come here for advice at all. you just disagree with everything. Just go on your merry way, she's gunna bang the hell outta her ex's cawk the first chance she gets, then she'll come home and tell you how much she loves you. enjoy.
 

backbreaker

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i don't fault the chump.

when i came here back in 2002, i asked for advise... basically what i wanted to hear, an d when guys like anti tump basically told me the truth, although they had results beyond anythnig i could imagine, id d not want to hear it. they did not understand how "unique" she was, and how "unique" the situation was

lol


it's a process man. it's alot like drugs. the vast majority of users believe it or not, outgrow drug use. but it takes a while and it requires going though enough to where you cannot deny something has to change.

with women, a man has to get his heart burned THAT bad for him to realize. this guy hasn't hit that point yet.
 
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