Getting dumped for a loser?

[catsmd71]

Sometimes they do this to fell better about themselves. Your experience and knowledge was likely intimidating.

He contacted me a month after pretending she didn't exist. I snooped just to double check and found out. He's insane and I'm sooooooo embarrassed I had/have feelings for this loser with zero self esteem. I did NOTHING wrong. I simply wasn't drama trash. Thanks for your feedback.

 

[catsmd71]

what pisses me off about getting dumped for a loser or a girl choosing a loser over you is weeks/months/years down the road that same girl will run around running her mouth to anyone that'll listen "I can't find a good man....why are all men jerks.....i'm tired of dating losers." I'm thinking "no b!tch, it's not the guys fault, it's your stupidity and decision making that got you in the mess you're in and you have no one to blame but your damn self!" I don't have any secret powers but I can tell within a VERY short time if a woman is worth dating or not. doesn't take me months or years to figure the crap out. I know women base most of their decisions on emotion instead of logic like men but that's still no excuse. women want to be taken seriously and be known for their smarts, well they need to start acting like it and start making better decisions in their life.

100% agree. Reverse for me obviously since I'm dealing with men.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Women look for drama, they like to take care and nurture the helpless, they like rollercoasters.

If you are a guy who's life is perfect you're too boring man, too predictable, and probably too entitled, because in your mind you expect the same perfection from others.

But an unemployed, single father, with criminal tendencies, oh boy it's the perfect rollercoaster they need.

 

[catsmd71]

Women look for drama, they like to take care and nurture the helpless, they like rollercoasters.

If you are a guy who's life is perfect you're too boring man, too predictable, and probably too entitled, because in your mind you expect the same perfect from others.

But an unemployed, single father, with criminal tendencies, oh boy it's the perfect rollercoaster they need.

Luckily us good women wouldn't glance at the unemployed single father loser.

 

[Red Legg]

The mysteries of a woman's "interest level" will never be understood by us "logical" men....ever....

 

[catsmd71]

The mysteries of a woman's "interest level" will never be understood by us "logical" men....ever....

Sorry that happens for you guys. I know if you step back from a woman and talk more than date for a few months you can really see her character. See if she's using you, full of ****, a coward or just dumb. Plus attempt to see how many men she's hiding from you and whether they're a threat. That's what I'm doing with the man I'm seeing now. 90% phone and 10% dating. Each month we will build up to that number reversing. We're really learning each other's character this way. Very informative.

 

[Dingo]

Have you ever stopped to wonder that it might be you. After all they are the ones that split. For whatever reason they left you for them....

 

[catsmd71]

Have you ever stopped to wonder that it might be you. After all they are the ones that split. For whatever reason they left you for them....

Yes absolutely. Strong people can step back and truly see if they deserved to be left for someone, if they were the irrational one that caused the breakup or something else. Here's what we all are saying. You don't have to want or love us. But throwing your life away for criminally behaving trash with zero values is Never the answer. Ever. In my case my guy still denies he's with anyone anyway. I saw the evidence after snooping through a Facebook google search since I'm not involved with Facebook. Anyway I pray everyone finds the best they can in life and never settles.

 

[Glassguy]

I see a bunch of dodged bullets in this thread, not missed opportunities. If you date trash, they will still be trash when they leave or you leave them.

Some women just like the trashy guys. Increase your standards in women and avoid the drama.

 

[guru1000]

The mysteries of a woman's "interest level" will never be understood by us "logical" men....ever....

Let me share something with you from the other side: When a woman acts whimsically toward you, she's not that into you.

Women with high IL do not confuse you.

 

[catsmd71]

Let me share something with you from the other side: When a woman acts whimsically toward you, she's not that into you.

Women with high IL do not confuse you.

Let me share something with you from the other side: When a woman acts whimsically toward you, she's not that into you.

Women with high IL do not confuse you.

I have to agree. Beware the person whose too friendly. Friendly has "friend" in it. Nervous has "shot nerves" in it.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Just like "Beauty" is in the eye of the beholder---so is "Value". My experience has taught me that your value seen thru the eyes of someone else is sometimes only based on WHATEVER it is that they think they need or desire at that moment in time.

People who display fluctuating interest in you are unconsciously revealing to you that either they no longer value what you bring to the relationship---or that the things they used to value...have changed.

This is why it's of paramount importance that when it comes to successful relationships that BOTH people involved know who they are, what they want out of the relationship, and have the ability to recognize what the other person "brings to the table" BEFORE they agree to exclusivity.

Internet Forums, Divorce Courts, and even Graveyards are littered with the casualties of men and women who FAILED to take the potential dangers of the Dating/Relationship War seriously.

V.U.

 

[catsmd71]

Just like "Beauty" is in the eye of the beholder---so is "Value". My experience has taught me that your value seen thru the eyes of someone else is sometimes only based on WHATEVER it is that they think they need or desire at that moment in time.

People who display fluctuating interest in you are unconsciously revealing to you that either they no longer value what you bring to the relationship---or that the things they used to value...have changed.

This is why it's of paramount importance that when it comes to successful relationships that BOTH people involved know who they are, what they want out of the relationship, and have the ability to recognize what the other person "brings to the table" BEFORE they agree to exclusivity.

Internet Forums, Divorce Courts, and even Graveyards are littered with the casualties of men and women who FAILED to take the potential dangers of the Dating/Relationship War seriously.

V.U.

Sometimes one or both parties haven't completed there self journey yet, still teetering between wanting you and not until they realize it. When you love them during that time it's a terrible hell. I've been on both ends of the spectrum. I waited or he did. The one thing I learned is NO MATTER WHAT keep loving that person. Most likely they need it desperately and will one day thank you.

 

[Derek Flint]

I've seen plenty of hot women date guys below them, guys who would never be able to get a hot girl in their lives and my theory is that a hot girl will date down and have a relationship with a loser because he won't cheat on her like a higher value guy would.

He knows he hit the hot girl lotto and won't do anything to jeopardize the relationship.

Some women might value a faithful partner above all else.

Just a theory.

 

[catsmd71]

I've seen plenty of hot women date guys below them, guys who would never be able to get a hot girl in their lives and my theory is that a hot girl will date down and have a relationship with a loser because he won't cheat on her like a higher value guy would.

He knows he hit the hot girl lotto and won't do anything to jeopardize the relationship.

Some women might value a faithful partner above all else.

Just a theory.

But then she may cheat. It happens. No easy answers.

 

[Derek Flint]

But then she may cheat. It happens. No easy answers.

Good point.
And her lower value BF will take her back because he knows will never get anywhere close to such a hot girl again, so he "forgives" her.
She controls the frame, the relationship.
She gets to have her cake and eat it too.
Guys do this as well.

 

[SuckItUp]

Pretty simple really. The OP made the presumption that since he choose to be with them they must be high quality, whereas in reality they were low quality women who had shown the facade of being high quality.

When a woman drops a paper high quality man it either has to do with hq man not maintains frame or the woman realizing her innate value and seeking a partner at that level.

That's why maintaing your frame and filtering are so important. There are a lot of low quality women who masquerade as high quality women, but they do tip their true quality from time to time when they think no one is looking, or they think a guy is too oblivious to notice. Hell sometimes they'll blatantly show their true self. It's up to the man to demand high quality by testing woman and removing low quality women from his life.

If you have bad investing time you don't hang on to them (save for tax purposes), you jettison them for better investments.

 

[catsmd71]

I have a few high quality exes who are crazy about me and I trust them. I may only want dinner or slowly start up again but I'm DONE with low quality wanna be or "be" trash men and all their drama. The lower the drama - the better the match!