Gentlemen - I want you to learn from my almighty blunder

[sylvester the cat]

Asked this girl out. 24 years old.

TEXTED her the following:

Me: So i need to buy a pair of jeans tomorrow. You wanna come help me choose?

(Already all the DJ codes are broken with this initial message. Asking her out by text, asking if she wants to come rather than telling her to come and all this on a Friday (yesterday) night! but this just goes to show that if a girl is into you it doesn't really matter)

Her: Need help?
Me: Sure. I hate shopping. Say (place of meet) 2pm.
Her: How about 4pm? I'm a bit out tonight.
Me: Good point. 4 is probably better.
Her: Cool.

So come 4pm the next day (today). We meet up. Hug. Go to first shop. Make small talk whilst I rummage for jeans. Learn that she is a smoker. I jest that she seems like such a good girl that I can't believe she smokes. Can't find any jeans I like so walk to a Levi's shop. I buy a pair.

I then thank her for accompanying me. She asks what my plans are that evening. I say my plan is to put the jeans on and go impress the world with them. I ask her what her plans are. She says she has to be at somewhere at 6pm. Cool. I walk her to the train station.

Before we get there I ask if she has any smokes. She has and offers me one. I tell her I only smoke if I'm drinking and suggest we have a drink. She agrees (it's now 5.30 - so much for her having to be somewhere at 6pm!)

A couple of hours and a few drinks later we decide to call it a night. Her way is left, my way is right.

*HERE IS WHERE I F**K IT UP!*

I should have taken her by the hand and guided her my way with not a word spoken. If she had asked where we were going I would have said my place. If she agreed I would have known she was DTF, had she not then likewise.

BUt I didn't. I pvssied out and went her way and wished her a good night and left it at that and went home alone in full beta mode despite all the buying signs being there.

I should be having awesome sex with a ripe 24 year old right now but instead I'm typing this out for all to read. shame on me.

 

[Tomo]

Look at the positives my man. Most guys would have p*ssied out by the time of purchasing the jeans and asking her for a drink. You were smooth enough to guide the conversation to spending a few hours out with her besides the 'plans' she had. You're over thinking it like the best of us do sometimes. When things like this happen make a mental note and next time in the same situation, don't repeat the same mistakes. Just switch the brain off and go.

 

[Night-hawk]

Bro, it doesn't matter. While your heart goes to the stars, leave the girls' at Mars. Hot and full of scars.

 

[blind_one]

Think about it the other way, experience gains like these have their weight in gold, plus your showing the other guys the way to go, be proud and keep on truckin.

 

[hudpes]

The way I picture a successful girl-getting process is you should be like an arrow that is shot out from a bow, first it was aimed, then once the string is released, the arrow does not change direction, no matter what happens when airborne. If I meet someone I like, I want her to end up in my bed, that's the target. I approach, I talk to her, I tell her I want to go out with her, I ask for her phone number, I call her and set up a date, I go on a date, attempt to kiss her until successful, attempt to bring her back home until successful. Now, she decides how far she will go and therefore I might fail at any point, but I always went the right direction. If I shy away from any of those things, because I'm not lucid enough or goal oriented enough, or push them to some future "more appropriate" point, failure is very likely. And this consistency in action is a prerequisite for maximizing your chances and nullifying chances of you regretting your actions.

 

[DragonBlood]

Her way is left, my way is right. I should have taken her by the hand and guided her my way with not a word spoken. If she had asked where we were going I would have said my place. If she agreed I would have known she was DTF, had she not then likewise.

BUt I didn't. I pvssied out and went her way and wished her a good night and left it at that and went home alone in full beta mode despite all the buying signs being there.

THIS IS WHERE I SCREWED UP TOO. Finally I know what I did wrong.

I meet a girl in the park randomly that I was gaming the previous night (I didnt recognize her and she stopped me). I wasnt going to follow her but, She rejected my now second offer to go my way so I played aloof and walked away thinking I would get a chance later by being indifferent. I should have grabbed her hand and made her go my way before being indifferent. I KNOW it would of worked. ****.

thanks SC. I feel your pain

 

[SteR]

I think you're being a bit hard on yourself. It sounds like there's still something to work with.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Dear SoSuave,

Please STOP 'hugging' girls, apart from under the following three circumstances:

-You are consoling a genuine grievance of hers.
-You are kissing her, passionately.
-You are lying in bed with her, in a mire of your combined post-coitus sweat and juice.

And I agree with the OP. Should have closed this one right off, especially after saving such a 'huggy' lame start. No rep deserved, but at least the man recognised the error of his ways.

The next guy who makes me vomit by reporting they 'hugged' (eugh, it's such a nauseous word!) will have rep taken away.

Regards,

TMK