SmoothSmooth
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2021
- Messages
- 548
- Reaction score
- 569
- Age
- 31
I am currently toying with a new theory.
I believe men that are drawn to the ‘concept’ of game are those that have strong traits in following personality types - autism, narcissism & sociopathy.
these people struggle with empathy - which is how neurotypical people relate to each other. Empathy extends to communication style for neurotypical (normal) people, which is mainly symbolic and feeling based, and based around small talk.
People with neurodivergent personality types see everything as black and white, and in terms of social power. It’s not a strength or weakness, it can be either depending on how its used - autistic people for example are the builders of the modern world and great works of art/music (heightened perception, pattern recognition & sensitivity). A lot of famous people are on the spectrum (as are a lot of failures/degenerates).
However, being on the spectrum creates huge issues with dealing with the opposite sex. Neurodivergent people are very blunt & to the point (see: most post on this forum for example - ‘I have problem A, give me solution B’). Furthermore, high functioning neurodivergent people have learned how to mimic, manipulate and control neurotypical communication styles to their advantage (see: sociopathic salesmen & politicians who know exactly what to say and when to say it, to trick normal people into liking them)
PUA and the concept of ‘game’ therefore extends to people somewhat on the spectrum who have managed to use manipulation successfully in other areas of their life and think a similar skillset must exist with women.
Women, especially socially attractive ones, are very high on neurotypical (normal) communication styles. Everything is in the grey area, things are done and said for no purpose beyond connection, body language and expressions make up 80% of communication, sharing spontaneous feelings and strengthening feelings of belonging is the basis of speech (watch any women’s talk show). It’s all about how things you say make you and others feel good (see: beyonce concert).
Attractive men that are neurotypical (normal), are in a similar mode of existence. There is no end game, and they have learned to trust in the spontaneity of small talk and socialising knowing that it will garner appropriate results relative to their own value. There is no concept of ‘doing’ or ‘saying’ something to bring about a result that mainly falls down to chance.
Furthermore, a lot of the neurotypicals interaction with the world is desensitised, ie blunted - ie they do not process events with as much detail and meaning as a autistic person does (autism is essentially a very ‘masculine’ and logical mind and many men, especially professional men who are successful, lean towards autism)
Girl didn’t reply to neurotypicals text - no big deal, she is probably going on holiday or playing games (or just being….normal…remember normal people do not act with as much intent or urgency to bring about social results)… guy instead hits up friends Max and goes to the party (again, to make small talk and strengthen bonds)…3 weeks later he naturally reinitiate small talk with no purpose with the girl (because neurotypicals like to strengthen bonds), girl now seems warm, invites out -> begins dating.
Girl didn’t reply to neurodivergents text -> he automatically assumes there is a problem -> does not understand subtext of just….girls being random….
goes online, reads about ‘game’, wonders if his smv isn’t high enough, wonders if his text was too boring or needy, spends 2 weeks thinking about it, double texts…black & white thinking about mystery chad and 80/20 rules….and so forth. Then, the next girl he speaks to, same mistake occurs and he seems even more ‘off’, and now his internal world which is filled with logic and pattern recognition (as opposed to emotion) becomes distorted and solidifies his skewed perception of dating and his social worth. He is just a bit too…scripted….to be socially appealing.
the only true communication style which women respond to, is the RANDOM SPONTANEOUS feelings of ‘flow’. The gradual discovery that is born out of small talk and familiarity. Normal people are interested in things that feel and seem unscripted, chit chat which is not controversial or jarring in any way. There is no power game behind it, no one-upping, no comebacks, and words are never a premeditated ‘test’ that need to passed, but rather blurtings in the moment that have no real meaning behind them. In conversation, there is no give, there is no take, there is just is responding to whatever is happening in the moment and the chips may fall wherever. People kind of just exist with each other, and sometimes end up hooking up, sometimes falling in love, but overall act in a very routine way. The primary aim is always the preservation of the norm, fitting in with expected behaviour, and ensuring nobody’s feelings get hurt.
If you are attractive, yet struggling with women, it’s not because your game is off. You need to remove the idea of game or studying sexuality from your head. You need to just, slow down your response and meaning projection on the outside world, and stop viewing communication as a tool to power.
Because you cannot manipulate people into feeling safe and familiar around you.
PUA guys like RSD Owen, Mystery do not make people feel comfortable and safe around them with their routines and intensity, and def will struggle with long term friends and dating beyond same day lays.
Because you are projecting too much INTENTION behind what you do and say, which automatically puts any NORMAL person on the defense.
there is NO ‘coach’ who has mastered a style of communication that consistently gets him laid with hot women. Communication in dating doesn’t world like that . Conversation IS power, at work, in politics, in media…just not in the social world or dating. In these realms, FEELINGS AND SYMBOL sharing reign supreme.
The best way to think about it is….remember when you were just 7 years old interacting with women in the school playground. THAT is the state you need to be operating out. Cute, random, curious but not in an overly pushy/caring way, filled with random emotions and almost you don’t even know sex exists.
You must destroy all ideas of ‘SOCIAL RANK’ or over-analysis when speaking to people especially women. Instead move into the realm of, chit chat and leaving threads open
When you talk to women, your mentality should be ‘things COULD happen, just not RIGHT NOW. Right now we are chit chatting for the sake of chit chatting! And when the conversation is over, it’s over and means nothing good or bad. I will now go and chit chat with another person.
soon you have multiple threads going, over a period of time, girls feel familiar with you, and the probability of getting a sexual outcome vastly increase
the logical mind says ‘but won’t I end up in the friendzone?’ The answer is NO! Because chit chat does not = supplication and part of your chit chat will revolve around topics relating to dating, her relationship status etc and you should be busy chit chatting to so many people that your attention will retain its value
you have to put yourself in the shoes of a highly in demand man. for example would a top nightclub DJ that meets 20 models a night backstage be ‘gaming’ women? And how would women respond to that? No, he would be meeting, greeting, getting contact details have about 50 text conversations going over multiple months, revolving around general chit chat. Sometimes messages get ignored. Sometimes they respond fast. Sometimes messages get returned weeks later. Eventually he invites girls to see him when and if the moment arises after familiarity has been established and both parties feel like a somewhat reliable presence in each others lives.
STRENGTHENING SOCIAL BONDS ALWAYS COMES FIRST, everything else flows from there. A person with high social value (beautiful woman) are not going to be sleeping around with random guy to random guy of unknown social backgrounds and obliterate their own carefully maintained social value. This goes back to CAVEMAN TIMES, its wired in our biology, sleeping with the wrong man was a SOCIAL crime
I believe men that are drawn to the ‘concept’ of game are those that have strong traits in following personality types - autism, narcissism & sociopathy.
these people struggle with empathy - which is how neurotypical people relate to each other. Empathy extends to communication style for neurotypical (normal) people, which is mainly symbolic and feeling based, and based around small talk.
People with neurodivergent personality types see everything as black and white, and in terms of social power. It’s not a strength or weakness, it can be either depending on how its used - autistic people for example are the builders of the modern world and great works of art/music (heightened perception, pattern recognition & sensitivity). A lot of famous people are on the spectrum (as are a lot of failures/degenerates).
However, being on the spectrum creates huge issues with dealing with the opposite sex. Neurodivergent people are very blunt & to the point (see: most post on this forum for example - ‘I have problem A, give me solution B’). Furthermore, high functioning neurodivergent people have learned how to mimic, manipulate and control neurotypical communication styles to their advantage (see: sociopathic salesmen & politicians who know exactly what to say and when to say it, to trick normal people into liking them)
PUA and the concept of ‘game’ therefore extends to people somewhat on the spectrum who have managed to use manipulation successfully in other areas of their life and think a similar skillset must exist with women.
Women, especially socially attractive ones, are very high on neurotypical (normal) communication styles. Everything is in the grey area, things are done and said for no purpose beyond connection, body language and expressions make up 80% of communication, sharing spontaneous feelings and strengthening feelings of belonging is the basis of speech (watch any women’s talk show). It’s all about how things you say make you and others feel good (see: beyonce concert).
Attractive men that are neurotypical (normal), are in a similar mode of existence. There is no end game, and they have learned to trust in the spontaneity of small talk and socialising knowing that it will garner appropriate results relative to their own value. There is no concept of ‘doing’ or ‘saying’ something to bring about a result that mainly falls down to chance.
Furthermore, a lot of the neurotypicals interaction with the world is desensitised, ie blunted - ie they do not process events with as much detail and meaning as a autistic person does (autism is essentially a very ‘masculine’ and logical mind and many men, especially professional men who are successful, lean towards autism)
Girl didn’t reply to neurotypicals text - no big deal, she is probably going on holiday or playing games (or just being….normal…remember normal people do not act with as much intent or urgency to bring about social results)… guy instead hits up friends Max and goes to the party (again, to make small talk and strengthen bonds)…3 weeks later he naturally reinitiate small talk with no purpose with the girl (because neurotypicals like to strengthen bonds), girl now seems warm, invites out -> begins dating.
Girl didn’t reply to neurodivergents text -> he automatically assumes there is a problem -> does not understand subtext of just….girls being random….
goes online, reads about ‘game’, wonders if his smv isn’t high enough, wonders if his text was too boring or needy, spends 2 weeks thinking about it, double texts…black & white thinking about mystery chad and 80/20 rules….and so forth. Then, the next girl he speaks to, same mistake occurs and he seems even more ‘off’, and now his internal world which is filled with logic and pattern recognition (as opposed to emotion) becomes distorted and solidifies his skewed perception of dating and his social worth. He is just a bit too…scripted….to be socially appealing.
the only true communication style which women respond to, is the RANDOM SPONTANEOUS feelings of ‘flow’. The gradual discovery that is born out of small talk and familiarity. Normal people are interested in things that feel and seem unscripted, chit chat which is not controversial or jarring in any way. There is no power game behind it, no one-upping, no comebacks, and words are never a premeditated ‘test’ that need to passed, but rather blurtings in the moment that have no real meaning behind them. In conversation, there is no give, there is no take, there is just is responding to whatever is happening in the moment and the chips may fall wherever. People kind of just exist with each other, and sometimes end up hooking up, sometimes falling in love, but overall act in a very routine way. The primary aim is always the preservation of the norm, fitting in with expected behaviour, and ensuring nobody’s feelings get hurt.
If you are attractive, yet struggling with women, it’s not because your game is off. You need to remove the idea of game or studying sexuality from your head. You need to just, slow down your response and meaning projection on the outside world, and stop viewing communication as a tool to power.
Because you cannot manipulate people into feeling safe and familiar around you.
PUA guys like RSD Owen, Mystery do not make people feel comfortable and safe around them with their routines and intensity, and def will struggle with long term friends and dating beyond same day lays.
Because you are projecting too much INTENTION behind what you do and say, which automatically puts any NORMAL person on the defense.
there is NO ‘coach’ who has mastered a style of communication that consistently gets him laid with hot women. Communication in dating doesn’t world like that . Conversation IS power, at work, in politics, in media…just not in the social world or dating. In these realms, FEELINGS AND SYMBOL sharing reign supreme.
The best way to think about it is….remember when you were just 7 years old interacting with women in the school playground. THAT is the state you need to be operating out. Cute, random, curious but not in an overly pushy/caring way, filled with random emotions and almost you don’t even know sex exists.
You must destroy all ideas of ‘SOCIAL RANK’ or over-analysis when speaking to people especially women. Instead move into the realm of, chit chat and leaving threads open
When you talk to women, your mentality should be ‘things COULD happen, just not RIGHT NOW. Right now we are chit chatting for the sake of chit chatting! And when the conversation is over, it’s over and means nothing good or bad. I will now go and chit chat with another person.
soon you have multiple threads going, over a period of time, girls feel familiar with you, and the probability of getting a sexual outcome vastly increase
the logical mind says ‘but won’t I end up in the friendzone?’ The answer is NO! Because chit chat does not = supplication and part of your chit chat will revolve around topics relating to dating, her relationship status etc and you should be busy chit chatting to so many people that your attention will retain its value
you have to put yourself in the shoes of a highly in demand man. for example would a top nightclub DJ that meets 20 models a night backstage be ‘gaming’ women? And how would women respond to that? No, he would be meeting, greeting, getting contact details have about 50 text conversations going over multiple months, revolving around general chit chat. Sometimes messages get ignored. Sometimes they respond fast. Sometimes messages get returned weeks later. Eventually he invites girls to see him when and if the moment arises after familiarity has been established and both parties feel like a somewhat reliable presence in each others lives.
STRENGTHENING SOCIAL BONDS ALWAYS COMES FIRST, everything else flows from there. A person with high social value (beautiful woman) are not going to be sleeping around with random guy to random guy of unknown social backgrounds and obliterate their own carefully maintained social value. This goes back to CAVEMAN TIMES, its wired in our biology, sleeping with the wrong man was a SOCIAL crime
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