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Friend is stuck in a relationship with a nutjob... How to help?

Brighty

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Basically I'm looking for any advice I could console my friend with, he seems like he's in a pretty rough spot and I really don't know how to handle it so I figured I'd ask for your guys' help.

Essentially he's in a relationship with a girl who has emotional problems, she's on some kind of antidepressant and he's told me that she sometimes has suicidal thoughts. They always hang out together and she's told him before that he's basically one of the only reasons why she hasn't tried to go through with it. She's needy and very temperamental and when they're both hanging out with me and my buds, she often tries to be controlling with him. I had no idea it was this bad before he approached me today about it - he took me aside and told me that she called him one day and started accusing him of stuff he didn't do and was looking for reasons to be upset with him so she could go ahead and do it guilt-free.

I've never seen my friend so... I dont know what the right word is... burdened I guess. He tells me its been stressing him out and he wants out of the relationship, not because he doesn't want to be with her, but because he said its taken a huge emotional toll on him. He's worried that if he breaks This guy has been my bud for the longest time so I want to help him out as best I can. Is there any advice for a situation like this?
 

K2000kidd

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Tell your "friend" he has gotten himself in over his head and to cut off all contact then run far and fast in the opposite direction, sounds alot like BPD or bipolar (NOT a professional diagnosis, only a gut feeling)

There is NO happy ending for these two
 

WaterTiger

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K2000kidd said:
Tell your "friend" he has gotten himself in over his head and to cut off all contact then run far and fast in the opposite direction, sounds alot like BPD or bipolar (NOT a professional diagnosis, only a gut feeling)

There is NO happy ending for these two

I second this motion!:up:

The chick is a nut case & he needs to cut all contact with her. She'll call, come by his house & threaten suicide. She might even attempt suicide.

NONE OF THIS IS HIS FAULT! EXPLAIN THAT TO HIM!

His breaking up with her doesn't "make" her do anything. He is NOT responsible for her actions.

It's going to be ugly, but it's best for both parties.
 

Blown5.0

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But what IF she did comment suicide?
I have a chick thats 90% the same way....even tho i know i need to run, if she did do it...I dont know what i would do with my self!

I bet your friend feels the same way!
 

jophil28

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Blown5.0 said:
But what IF she did comment suicide?
I have a chick thats 90% the same way....even tho i know i need to run, if she did do it...I dont know what i would do with my self!

I bet your friend feels the same way!
Here is a question for you - Do you want to spend your life on suicide watch ?
Women who hint at, or openly threaten to commit suicide rarely do so.
In the vast majority of cases her threat is an attempt to control the listener in some way . It is highly manipulative and just plain hostile.
However it mostly does achieve its objective because nobody wants to call their bluff in case they carry out their threat.

The best response is to contact a Suicide Prevention Center and follow their advice.
You need to detach yourself from this woman for your own mental health's sake. No untrained civilian should carry the burden of another' decision to live or die.
 
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1337

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3 ways out of this:
1. what the previous posters said its most likeyl a bluff
2. Fake his death or dissappear, move out of town, name change.
3. Your friend should make up some bs lie hes moving out of town to another country or something and he should lay low for about a month or 2 and pull no contact. After a month she should or would get tired of pursuing him and move on to another victim.
 
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