FR First Night Out in a while...

[Murse]

Hey guys. Went out last night, my game is a bit rusty... Feedback would be appreciated please. Think I know where I went wrong

Started off in a new bar that was packed, nice place but few woman my age and we were all packed in like sardines. Anyway, moved on...

Standing at the bar and an HB7 and her friend 8 are standing to the right of us, then sit down at the seat just behind me, I 'accidentally' bump into the table behind me where there drinks are and look round to apologies and HB8 points to her friend with her thumb saying it was her, I said it was the tables fault... I then spoke with my friend for a second then turned

ME: My friend and I were just guessing what you guys might do for a living... you look like pencil pushers! Do you work behind a desk or something?

8: I'm a police officer.

8 gets up and goes for a drink at the bar leaving her friend.

ME: What about you?

HB7: I'm a pharmacist.

ME: Cool. What do you think of ePrescribing?

HB7: (smiling) yeah it's good, but they don't have it in my hospital. Why did you ask me that? Did you not believe I am a pharmacist.

ME: Just testing the water... lol is your friend really a police officer?

HB7: She was a special constable for a bit. She is a analyst for the rail ways.

ME: (thinking pencil pusher) do you think she was offended?

HB7: laughing) I think it was the way you said it.

ME: I'll need to work on my delivery then.

HB7: What do you do?

ME: I'm a nurse.

We talk **** about hospitals and stuff for a bit.

I was aware my mate was standing beside me but you couldn't really engage him in the conversation due to his position and the table without him sitting down beside them or leaning over because of the loud music... HB8 comes back and sits down.

ME: Your friend was just telling me you use to be a special...

HB8: mock looking at her friend like she's been betrayed lol) yeah, I don't do it anymore.

Turn back to HB7 (kinda like her more) ME: What hospital are you at then?

HER: Oh such and such lbah blah.

ME: So what are you doing down here?

HER: I'm from here originally, but my parents don't know I'm back down.

ME: What do you think you're parents would say if they found out you were down going to clubs and not even visiting them? Are you just gonna drop round for a sunday roast then leave lol?

HER: Blah blah...

ME: Oh btw this is my mate Dave! He's just sold a screenplay to *******

ME: Hey, Dave! (to her) This is Dave... Dave this is......

HER: NAME

HER: Whats your name? (to me)

ME: Murse... (I shake her hand)

HER: Thats very formal. (still holding hands)

ME: You can tell alot about a person by there hand shake, I like it nice and firm and not like a dead fish! (She gives me another firm handshake)

HER: smiling)

ME: Dave, tell her about your screenplay.

He explains about his screenplay and her friend gets up.

HB8: Come on, lets go over there and get drinks. (I could tell they were leaving)

HER: Maybe see you later then.

ME: Would you like my number? (RAGING I SAID THAT! I new immediately that blew me out the water, so gay anywhere she smiled and said she would maybe see me later but I could tell it was over.)

Chatted to a few other chicks on hen do after we stole there seats and that was that.

My game is a bit rusty I know... Should I have engaged the friend more? Dave said he was getting no eye contact from HB8 at all and the table was kinda in the way to talk with her...

 

[doctorj]

it was the interview questions that killed the interaction, don't worry it gets the best of us...next time avoid boring her by asking things like work, family etc.

 

[Murse]

How do you avoid the interview type questions?

 

[Sofomore]

You follow up by telling stories or getting her to talk about herself. Talk about fun things! Her hobbies etc.

"So I was out today on the street and you will not BELIEVE what I saw...."


It seems like you didn't really flirt with her. Also, be sure to be better friends with her friend. You focused the interaction on HB7, so HB8 got bored and pissed. Girls that are going out in groups will stick with their group. They realized you were not going anywhere, so they had to leave first. I always like to leave the interaction first, it gets them wondering why I am not fawning over them like every other guy is.

 

[Murse]

Hmm, okay. I'll try flirt more... I was trying to bust on her a bit about her not visiting her parents which I think she found amusing...

I'll try to avoid this for next time.

 

[DanZy]

How do you avoid the interview type questions?

You don't ask them...

 

[synergy1]

How do you avoid the interview type questions?

first of all, I am surprised you can remember any of the conversations.

When I go out and meet women I don't know, its all banter mostly. I try and avoid topics like what I do, and keep conversation light. Its been a work in progress and I think I've gotten good at it. The basic jist of it was covered in an old post, so i'll go by what I started with and have developed.

The easiest way to start a conversation is to notice something - how she dresses, what someone else is doing etc. Got to keep your eyes open here. For example, if shes wearing earings that look like they are out of egypt i'd say

"Nice earrings Cleopatra" or something to that effect.

To keep a conversation flowing, I simply think on my feet about whatever nouns they use after. As in the previous example, she might say ' yeah, I got them when I went to ____ on vacation with my friends. Here you have three nouns to pick from: a location, a vacation, and friends. I might respond

" Friends? Did they chose those for you?" (again, something like that)

The basic idea is to get her talking, and by going off what she says, it keeps her talking about herself a little which makes it easy. The thing you have to learn on your own is how to be funny with the banter. It took years to do this, but am now considerably better than my friends are in a social setting.

Things to avoid: don't talk about stuff like your job, how much you earn. At least not directly. I drop hints, but usually only answer questions about my work once they are laughing a little and the conversation is flowing naturally. As another poster said

You follow up by telling stories or getting her to talk about herself. Talk about fun things! Her hobbies etc.

 

[Murse]

Okay. I think It's clearer in my head now. Thanks for that... I shall try keep you guys updated.