First Rejection.

[san1]

What's going on fellow DJ's. Today couple hours ago I've had my first rejection. Sitting in the streetcar, coming back home I have been racking my brains where I went wrong. So i'm hoping one of you fine gentlemen would shed some light.

I've known her for couple years and I've always hated her personality but one thing that always attracted me to her was how carefree she was and she had pretty big breasts and an overall body that can give senior citizens a boner without viagra.
So why didn't I make a move before? Because I am not as confident as I am at this moment to put it bluntly.
Today we met, i'm teasing her being fat and other little things, being ****y/funny and being playful the whole package. She was responding very well to it. She was touching my hand while we walked, we stood by the metal fence while Sidney Crosby and many other stars walked the red carpet (NHL awards in Toronto) she was really close but not sandwiched together. I didn't think nothing of it.
Then we went to this place called waterfront, kind of like a docks boats and every thing, but they have a beautiful place for people to walk and sit around. So we found an isolated place and I took her I Pod which she wanted back, so we just wrestled each other until she got it back. Then she sits beside me she lies down on my laps but she's high enough for me to smell her hair, which I endulge in. She knows it because I say "your her smells good" and then she replies "Herbal bla bla bla essence bla bla bla". She takes my hands and tells me I have long nails and brings in for closer examination as she does that her huge breast is constantly on the way but she doesn't care my hands are rubbing against it so I say "let's make out". She's says "no" and she tells me "i'm not that easy", and my very smooth words were "I've wanted to make out with you since last year when we first met". She immediately got up and checked her phone and started saying "I have to go, my dad's going to angry", etc.
So, I weighed the situation and realised my chances of getting any thing is more or less gone down the drain so I decided to ask why she flirted, to which she replied "oh, I didn't think it was flirting". (really?)
So I acted like it didn't bother me, but it did, I was making a tent inside my pants.
I acted cool and then she started saying why do i think she's still single, I said "why?" then she went bla bla bla. I stayed cool and didn't appologize.

Now I probably set off her suspicion alarm with my ****y/funny and she's usually did the leading I followed but now it has all changed she even asked me if i say taht to all the ladies. But my mistake was "let's make out" (maybe different wording? if not just go for the kiss?)
I'd like to know what were the mistakes, thanks.

 

[FoolsCause]

mistakes:
1. "let's make out" S/B going for kiss without asking for clearance
2. "I've wanted to make out with you since last year when we first met." too serious... she didn't want to make any commitments.

But at least you don't like her much anyhow, so no big loss.

 

[LovelyLady]

then she replies "Herbal bla bla bla essence bla bla bla".

I think you actually started "losing her" by not really listening to her/understanding her - women rarely "blah Blah Blah" - you may think so, but there is usually something else going on/being communicated, if you slow down a bit and listen.

The Herbal Essence information was a strong green light - albeit a weakly cloaked one - to "proceed - but don't take me for granted" (Clairol Products are marketed towards women because "you know you are worth it").

Herbal Essence's advertising campaign is highly suggestive (for example: Citrus Lift scent is used for a.m. showers to "Get your juicy morning boost"). In their commercials they show women verbally simulating orgasms while the shampoo foams on their heads/hair.

Does she realize she is being obviously manipulated by the beauty industry's marketing? - I doubt it. But she was using a commonly understood sexual message within the world of most women - she just didn't stop to think that you wouldn't understand/hear what she was saying.

If you'd gotten that, you would have known to kiss her.

 

[wheelin&dealin]

You don't ever ask to make-out or have sex!! It's completely no verbal.

You have to use kino and eye contact to warm her up before you make a move. Trust me... she will give you cues as to what she wants by touching you back or giving you heavy eye contact. Then that's your green light to kiss her.

Don't worry about your mistake, just grab some other broad and fire it up. Cheers,

 

[san1]

I appreciate every one (all three of u) who replied. Yes I agree with Foolscause and wheelin&dealin, I think I pushed it too fast especialy since she mentioned dorm room stories of guys "trying to hit that" and she kept mentioning "i'm not that easy".
LovelyLady, I think that's too analytical, though i do thank thee for that much needed perspective.
So, to sum it up it's: me getting too serious, asking and (i think) pushing too quick.
So if that's all of the flaws I can gather from repsected DJ's then, I shall work on that and we'll trade advices if ever I screw up again, till then.
Respect. San1.

 

[Snow Plowman]

Haha

Typical Friend zone, jump out the closest man.

Now I'm only assuming you were in the friend zone all along, but what killed you was asking to make out. Don't ask for permission to do things, you must always LEAD the interaction, if she said yes then she would've been held accountable for what you both did, instead of it just happening.

Expressing what you've been thinking for a YEAR was also bad. The whole hand crap could've been a Sh!t test that she herself wasn't aware of. You reacted by wanting to makeout.

 

[san1]

What's going on Snow Plowman, friendzone, I didn't think of it. But would it make sense putting me, a friend, through **** test?

And the hand crap thingy, as she was holding on to my hands mesmerized by my nails, she was moving it side to side and the back of my hands would rest, no, pressed from her force, against her breasts (it was like a rubbing motion with the back of my hands, she's doing the guiding). I'm sure she felt it. but whatever, if it's a friendzone thingy, very little chance for me to do any thing really. so, next that like Nicholas Cage movie.

 

[Moofahsa]

You could easily get it IF you keep your cool and act just like you did before you ever said anything.

Just keep a level head and play it off like nothing happened...if she DOES bring it up just tell her that you can't help it you find her attractive.

You messed up

 

[ConantheLibertarian]

What's going on Snow Plowman, friendzone, I didn't think of it. But would it make sense putting me, a friend, through **** test?

And the hand crap thingy, as she was holding on to my hands mesmerized by my nails, she was moving it side to side and the back of my hands would rest, no, pressed from her force, against her breasts (it was like a rubbing motion with the back of my hands, she's doing the guiding). I'm sure she felt it. but whatever, if it's a friendzone thingy, very little chance for me to do any thing really. so, next that like Nicholas Cage movie.

That was your opportunity to make a move. Of course she felt it, she was guiding your hand. Instead of giving audible cues which give her a chance to react and rationalize (and reject), just act. Don't even give her a chance to think about it, because that's what she wants, to be led.

She was on your lap, you were rubbing her jugs with her helping hand, Mariano Rivera doesn't get it set up that nicely. But this is how you learn, and to not gloss over these cues. When you get good, situations like this will end with her cooking you breakfast .

 

[Snow Plowman]

What's going on Snow Plowman, friendzone, I didn't think of it. But would it make sense putting me, a friend, through **** test?

And the hand crap thingy, as she was holding on to my hands mesmerized by my nails, she was moving it side to side and the back of my hands would rest, no, pressed from her force, against her breasts (it was like a rubbing motion with the back of my hands, she's doing the guiding). I'm sure she felt it. but whatever, if it's a friendzone thingy, very little chance for me to do any thing really. so, next that like Nicholas Cage movie.

I'm only assuming your in the friend zone, because it doesn't matter if you've laid the girl rather quickly that actually determines the friend zone. It's if there was some sort of attraction there from when you first met that determines whether or not your actually in the friend zone.

What really messed you up was you reacted to the situation because your hand was on her breast. An then you reacted by saying you've been wanting to makeout with her from when you first met her.

You can keep at it and see where it leads but that moment you just folded.

 

[Alphamale1821]

Always look at like this bro, it's always best to just act and make the move as opposed to asking her or not making a move at all. If you make a move and she turns away she could say something like "i don't kiss on the first date blah blah blah, "your moving to fast" blah blah it doesn't matter because you made the move. As opposed to you waiting for the right moment and worst of all asking her which seems like your seeking her validation. When a girl is receptive to kino and eye contact then it's time for you to make the next move. Don't think about it just do it that way she has less time to come up with some bs reason why she won't kiss you. Also when you said "I've wanted to make out with you since last year when we first met" that was totally AFC. It shows if you wanted to make out with me why did it take you over a year to finally get the balls to attempt to do it.(hell you didn't even do it, you asked her) Lesson learned when you want something go for it.

Heres a quote i'll leave you with. "Boys get what they can and Men get what they want"