Female Anger=Interest? Myth or Fact

[TIC]

I common narrative that I hear from older guys is that when a female is angry at you specifically, it means she is emotionally invested in you and it might not be anything you've done, she may just be frustrated that she can't express her feelings for you or that you don't acknowledge her attraction to you.

To the mature men who have been around the block: Is this fact or myth?

Many times throughout my life, I've run into women, many times women I don't even know personally, who took it upon themselves to openly disrespect me or treat me badly in some way. Showcasing anger towards me for no apparent reason, leaving me clueless.

One example was recently at a Casino Poker Room. The dealer was an Asian girl, mid to late twenties. I had a question I wanted to ask her, and to get her attention I said "hey dealer" because I couldn't see her nametag. She completely ignored me and had a stone cold look on her face. I waited 20 seconds and said the same thing louder, again not in a negative tone but louder, and she still ignored me. The older Middle eastern dude sitting to my right chuckled in disbelief and asked me if I wanted him to get her attention for me, I told him "just forget it" and left it alone.

A little while later, the dealers switched and a male dealer sat down (Hispanic gentlemen) and I was easily engaged by him. So this meant one of two things: A) The asian girl was just having a bad day or B) She was displaying anger towards me for no reason

A few hours later she came back to my table to deal and seemed friendly with one of the male players at my table, so I began to think she had it out for me specifically,even though I've never met her before in my life.

Similar things have happened to me before. Is this just coincidence or is there something to it?

 

[sodbuster]

This one means nothing.... it's like hearing "mom" at the soccer complex...300 kids,10 yelling for mom. WHO are they looking for? How is she to know what dealer a guy who isn't in front of her is asking for? For all she knows, you could be talking to another dealer. DID you make EYE contact with her when you called "dealer"?

 

[st_99]

well sure its true but only when you've already had some kind of dating, sexual, flirty past.

Like this one girl i had sex with that I hang with time to time amongst other friends, i never went past treating her in anything more than a nonchalant friendly manner after i banged her and she's snapped at me a few times but I know its because she likes me and is frustrated. She is the type that hits and quits guys, never develops feelings for them but i turned the tables on her a little bit and it pisses her off.

 

[window]

you were being rude to the dealer in the way you addressed her, her response is what you would expect. It had absolutely nothing to do with you at all except that your social behaviour was well below par.

 

[origin138]

As for women randomly being *****es, get used to it. Many do it all the time, most don't even know they are doing it. It's just what they do.

As for your dealer friend, I wouldn't take this as interest from her at all. You probably offended her by not referring to her by her name. She probably felt objectified and took it deeply personal when you didn't ask her name first...so she punished you with silent treatment until you figured it out.

I used to bar tend, and the waitresses would get REALLY upset when they were referred to as "waitresses". They'd always come back to the way station whining about it. You should have clarified by asking her what her name was. Aside from that, who cares if she's giving you an attitude? Why let her get under your skin?

Another thing could be that you remind her of an ex that she's sore about. Women do this all the time. They'll punish complete strangers just because they remind them of a mean, evil, bad ex.

I work with a "woman" who sits on the interview panel at our company. We had a highly qualified man come in whom I wanted to hire on the spot. He was well-dressed, had a long list of successes under his belt, was well-spoken and alpha in every sense. He's the guy I wanted on my team because he could clearly get things done. When we discussed his interview, the female co-worker said, "I don't like him. He reminds me of an old ex." I hired him anyway, but I know that going forward, she will attempt to punish both me AND this new hire with passive-aggressiveness. Me, for not taking her seriously, and him, for "reminding her of an ex".

I really hope you didn't apologize to her or say something like "I'm sorry, your name is?" If it were me, I would have asked her outright what her name was, or simply looked for her name badge...but yea, what you did was rude and was likely perceived as arrogance.

 

[Poonani Maker]

There is a girl, young, who when I go into this bread shop during lunch sometimes to get some free bread samples, she's really rude to me and reluctantly gives me free samples. All the other girls, it doesn't matter what location, are nice and happy to give me free bread. This one, however, is cold pissy and disrespectful to me. I see her as a Christian "Clique" or elitist girl. I'm talkin' from the First day I met her, she's hated me. Most of the girls who do me this way, like right off the bat, then and forever, despised me were nunnish Christian girls (possibly virgin) who think I'm just the epitome of Hell. Hate the sin not the sinner doesn't apply to me when it comes to these types of girls. Most girls aren't like that.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

"Does female anger = interest?"

It's a tenuous distinction. Very tricky. Anger has driven many ladies to the bedroom, but also a not-unimportant number to the police station and civil court.

As a matter of dj fundamentality, I would say it shouldn't matter to you. This is especially a situation where caring too much will have you twisting your mind into a pretzel, which is what she should be doing, and by the time you catch yourself doing it you've usually already lost.

Which is a contradiction, precisely because there is no "winning" with women; to think in such commercial terms (as I do about everything except women) is to give them an inordinately high place within your hierarchy of values, which they don't want, or better: they want to earn.