Experienced DJs - what's your longest 'drought'?

[Nighthawk]

I broke up with a girl three weeks ago and have been going out most nights looking for a decent ****toy/potential ltr replacement without any success. Part of this is down to the fact that I have not seen any girls good enough for me. A couple I liked but it didn't happen (there was a burlesque dancer I was teasing well, but I couldn't be bothered to go to the next party where she would be at 3-30am so let her go for possible another time (forgot to get number also), and I have had several girls I wasn't attracted to make themselves available, but I can't go lower than a 7...

So make me feel a bit better, how many of you who do ok to great with women have had weeks where nothing fell into place? I think a month is my previous record of no action, I'm hoping not to beat that but I must have lost my mojo or something.

 

[Maxtro]

I think experienced DJ and drought just don't go together. If you're experienced you wouldn't have a drought, unless you were simply uninterested in sex.

The people who have droughts are the inexperienced.

Drought

1. a period of dry weather, esp. a long one that is injurious to crops.
2. an extended shortage: a drought of good writing.
3. Archaic. thirst.

Synonyms:
2. scarcity, lack, want, dearth, paucity, famine.

 

[Nighthawk]

Thanks for the input. However I am very experienced and like I say have not found anyone worthy of me. I put that down to bad luck. Anyone want to answer my question without using it as a chance to big themselves up?

 

[WC2]

Any experienced DJ who claims they've never gone through a drought is feeding you bullsh!t. We all have ups and downs in life whether you're a Don Juan or an insignificant loser.

I think your problem lies in your comparisons of other women to your ex. Usually when you're just leaving a relationship, the ex is the epitome of the woman you want to date again.

Really, you shouldn't even be thinking about dating again upon leaving a past relationship; at least not for a month or two. AT LEAST.

Why? We are humans and are built on habits. Whether good or bad, they CAN be broken as long as we are willing to do it.

Whether we'd like to admit it or not, when we find ourselves in relationships for a long time we tend to form bad habits.

Whether it's not going out as much as we used to or not having the willpower to do things on our own.

From reading, I think you're past the whole willpower thing, but you need to get over this whole 'this girl isn't good enough for me' type of deal. If you hold your standards too high, you will never get a chance to see what other women are like.

I doubt your next woman will be just like your ex, so stop trying to think of it that way. Chances are, she'll be better.

When I break up a relationship, I tend to take what is given to me. Now, not saying that I'd take some chick who looks like she'd been run over by a truck, but you put a cute broad infront of me, I'm going to take her home.

Why? Not only because it gives you a chance to get to know someone else, but because it also gives you a chance to get a new woman on your mind, thus erasing what you and your ex used to be.

Once you've done this, you can finally go into social situations with a clear mind, with no evidence of your ex lurking in your mind.

I wouldn't feel bad. The longest drought I ever had after a breakup was 2 months (sex that is). Sometimes it just takes a little while to get back on your feet after you first breakup. Luckily, it gets easier after that.

 

[Nighthawk]

Thanks WC2 - good advice though on this occasion the ex is not a particular influence. We were on and off for 6 months, but apart from the great sex it never gelled and I saw her as an 'inbetweener' really.

I do have very high standards, and can't bring myself to bang some 6 or even 7 if they don't get my **** hard. I'd rather wait. I would tell you if I thought I had picked up some bad habits, as I did after a nine year relationship a few years ago. I'm pretty sure I'm in the right frame of mind, unless I am somehow radiating desperation - which i don't think I am. I really think it's just bad luck and any day now I will see a girl I like and I'll get her. All this thread is for is for people to answer, as you did, that one time you went two months. Cheers, that makes me feel a bit more positive I guess.

I'd say the biggest mistake or accident of circumstance right now is that even when I knew this relationship was on it's way out, I failed to get any plates spinning in readiness. Again, I knew that would be wise, but just did not see or meet anyone in that time that was spinnable.

 

[Warrior74]

2 years. After I dropped out of college. I had zero social circle, I was at the bottom of a new social circle, I had no money, lived in a **** hole apartment next to the projects and did a lot of drugs. I finally got pissed at my life, got a job, started a business, got clean and got a girlfriend.

 

[bukowski_merit]

i found my way with women about 5 years ago....
i go through stages where $ex and women become unimportant to me (a big reason i wont settle down anytime soon)...

the longest one of these stages lasted was 5 months (pretty much the whole winter of 06)