Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Drug Policy

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
Does a company have to say if they drug test in their employee handbook? Most companies say they are a "drug free workplace." Is that a legal definition or just bull****? It could mean they do random drug testing, pre-employment drug testing, if they suspect you're high they make you take a drug test, or it could mean they don't do anything at all and they want to seem like they do.

I'm applying for jobs and I don't mind not smoking until after a pre-employment, but living with the constant fear of a random drug test just isn't worth it. I want to know how to thin down the possible employers. I'm currently writing down phone number of every employer I'm thinking of applying to, looking for a last existing payphone, and just calling them from an anonymous phone number.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,036
Reaction score
5,624
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
If you work in healthcare, you'll get randoms. If you have any other job and you get hurt on the job, they will test you against your will and deny your work comp if you fail. (Because obviously, smoking pot a few weeks ago is what made you get hurt :rolleyes: ) It's the same if you have a CDL and get into an accident, even one that was not your fault. For most other typical workplaces, "random" drug testing is often used to get rid of people the boss doesn't like.
 

backseatjuan

Banned
Joined
Nov 2, 2011
Messages
4,474
Reaction score
1,657
Age
43
Location
Россия
Everyone smokes weed even the boss. Many people do coke once a week including bosses. You can get fired from job for much dumber reasons, I think you shouldn't get paranoid about that, smoke all you want. Smoke before interview, say you drug free, then come home and smoke again. Even if they say drug tests are random and mandatory that's bull more than anything. If you maintain your adequacy no one will ever test you.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,749
Reaction score
41
Age
43
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
We have crazy drug testing at almost every casino in Vegas. Usually a hair follicle test for must of them. Concurrently after people get jobs they go right back to doing what ever drug(s) they frequented before the three months of abstaining before they got tested. We all have that "drug free" work place too. Generally after you pass your initial screening you have to do something like break property or severely injure yourself on the job to be hit with a random. If you "look high" from time to time they aren't going to do anything. For alls your employer knows you could be pulling double shifts or have a second job, and those drug test aren't cheap. Now if you show up all the time and are obviously intoxicated or just a junkie then of course they'll test you again but those people rarely get past preemployment screening because they have no self control.
 

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
Thanks for the responses.

I'm looking for something with banking, like loan processing or something. I figure they'll pre-employment screen me and I think I can survive that, I just really want to know about randoms. If somewhere hair tests, there's no way I'll pass it.

I smoke every Wednesday and Thursday because the odds of being called in to an interview on such short notice (Thursday or Friday) are very slim. This gives me at least 3 days to get clean. I chug tons of water every day, I eat niacin, drink cranberry juice, I work out an hour and a half every other day, I work out 20 minutes on my "off" days, and I run 1.5 miles in a sweat suit every day. I used to pee test myself every Monday morning and I pass, but I quit doing that because its expensive. I want to buy pee tests in bulk over the internet, but I hate leaving an electronic footprint for people to track me. I'm also concerned about working for the bank that does my banking, can they see I bought 7 drug tests online?

Some companies do list their HR policies online, but you'd still need a company lawyer to explain it to you, because written rules still don't explain everything.

Is there an easy way to find pay phones? I want to use them to call the HR departments to learn about their drug policies, anonymously.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,036
Reaction score
5,624
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
I don't know that you were "passing" the home test, so much as you were just diluting the sample. It depends upon the testing program, but a diluted sample can flunk you or require a re-test.

And pre-paid cel is the new pay phone. Good luck if you do get tested.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,749
Reaction score
41
Age
43
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
Bible_Belt said:
I don't know that you were "passing" the home test, so much as you were just diluting the sample. It depends upon the testing program, but a diluted sample can flunk you or require a re-test.

And pre-paid cel is the new pay phone. Good luck if you do get tested.
This is the truth. If you drink a ton of water before your test and your piss is clear they're going to ask for another sample. You can over come the coloring with a high consumption of B vitamins but it won't account for the lack of salt in your urine flow, so depending the results might come back "inconclusive" and that's bad. Also be sure not to work out 24 hours before a urine test. THC is stored in your fat cells so working out before a test will make it more visible.
 

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
I didn't pour anything into the urine sample to dilute it. I tested in the morning and the urine was yellow. I'm really skinny so it's not like I had lots of fat cells to store thc. I was clean one month before doing my twice a week thing, so there is no backlog of thc to be processed out. What if I drank Gatorade before my test? Last time I took a pee test for a job I used someone else's urine, heated it, and passed. How do they test for salt? When I tested for a job last time it looked like all they had was a home drug test like mine. Its also not like I'm taking a test for the courts.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,036
Reaction score
5,624
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
You're diluting it by drinking a lot of water; that's the old school way of beating the test.

A long time ago, I sat with an Army Dr who went over my urinalysis sample with me. I wasn't being accused of faking the drug test, which I did, but I was trying to flunk out of the Army for health reasons, so I ended up talking to a lot of doctors. Before my test, I drank one of the drinks to make you pass; it was like a very think orange gatorade. When the Army doc looked at the test results, he said, "Wow, these numbers are all so low! I bet they made you guys drink a lot of water before the test, didn't they?"

That's what you get with a diuretic or drinking a lot of water - all of the numbers of stuff they test for are low. B12 will make your pee yellow, but the test results will still be the same. And not everyone cares. I know the NFL flunks players automatically for a diluted sample; employers might just ask for a re-take. It's going to be obvious what you're doing, though, if they use any scrutiny at all. Sometimes the drug test is just a pretense to get lower insurance, so they don't really care that much.

fwiw, they do make synthetic urine, warmers, and even fake d!cks to p!ss it out of if they want to watch you.
 

Deep Dish

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
147
For the dilution method, you need to, among other things, eat creatine pills (available in nutrition stores) for a few days before the test to keep the specific gravity of your urine where it needs to be.
 

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
I've also heard of them searching for crystals of uric acid to see if the urine sample is recent? Do they really test for that? I have a job interview this Friday, so looks like no Wednesday or Thursday enjoyment for me. I'm going to the beach the next week so I'll maybe sneak some in then. The job was posted back in February so I'm not sure why its taking them that long to get someone. Hopefully they'll just tell me if I get it then but that's doubtful.

What numbers do they test for other than drugs?

Does creatine cause flatulence? I was wondering about that for just regular working out reasons too but I don't want to fart a lot.
 

Deep Dish

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
147
Maeisgood said:
I've also heard of them searching for crystals of uric acid to see if the urine sample is recent? Do they really test for that?
Who knows, but they probably do. It's a perpetually evolving game of a cat & mouse arms race.
I'm going to the beach the next week so I'll maybe sneak some in then.
Sorry to be a buzz kill, but it's best to stay totally clean until after you are tested. Defense wins games: the best offense is a good defense. However tempting it is to sneak a little enjoyment, there's no room for error and the margin of error is smaller than you think. The detection window times for marijuana are notoriously unreliable, the science is unsettled, dilution has limits, you can test negative one day and test positive the next, and the ng/ml cut-off point may be lower than usual.
Does creatine cause flatulence? I was wondering about that for just regular working out reasons too but I don't want to fart a lot.
Yeah but not while you're trying to dilute. You're supposed to exercise for as long as you can but not within in the last week. With one week remaining, you stop exercising and go into hibernation mode, eating as much fatty junk food and as many steaks as you can. And then you start the creatine. If a test result is questioned because of creatinine, you can say you're athletic.
 
Last edited:

horaholic

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 12, 2008
Messages
2,263
Reaction score
79
I dont think there is any law about disclosure about drug tests, but I dont know anyone who ever got a preemployment screening that wasn't told what kind of test it was. I dated a girl who was told beforehand that it was a mouth swab test, so she got the special mouthwash for it beforehand. Piss tests are cheaper, so thats what 99% of places will use. Also, its usually the employers insurance company who wants the tests in the first place. As a banker, the chances of being injured on the job are slim to none. Workers Comp usually just uses failed UA's as an excuse to deny claims.

You should just make sure you pass the initial, then if you get the job, ask around about the randoms. If you hear that they pop randoms, you can take precautions, by having a kit on standby.
 

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
horaholic- How did they just come out and say it was a swab test? Did she just ask?

I feel like if I ask it'd make me sketchy. I really want the job I have not smoked since 8-24 (I am keeping track :) ). On August 1 I smoked. On August 8 I took a pee test and passed it. I was hoping to smoke a day or two at the beach and enjoy the water, its my favorite thing to do but I guess I'll have to wait. I can wait for a pre-employment, but living with the fear of randoms is not living. If I don't get the job, I'll be super pissed about not having a piss test at all.

My test is with state government. My dad worked for them for years and I don't want to embarrass him so I guess no pot for me.

Damnit.

I'm just hoping that I can get a job so then I can go back to the reason I joined this forum- pvssy haha.
 

Deep Dish

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
147
I can wait for a pre-employment, but living with the fear of randoms is not living... My test is with state government.
That’s different.

With limited exceptions, state employees can’t be randomly tested. The Supreme Court has ruled government employees are protected by the Fourth Amendment against unreasonable searches. The only exceptions are either safety sensitive or special risk, like cops, firefighters, prison guards, Department of Transportation employees, and child abuse investigators. There must be a real concrete impact to risking public health. By law, safety sensitive or special risk positions must disclose the random drug testing policy in the job posting. So if you have to wonder, the answer is a definitive no.
 
Top