Don’t be a Man. Be a Stoic.

[Luthor Rex]

Don’t be a Man. Be a Stoic.

Others have given vague advice to “be a man” or to “man up.” But catch-phrases and generalities will not help us in our daily lives. For practical guidance we can instead turn ourselves to the council of philosophy:

“There are things which are within our power, and there are things which are beyond our power. Within our power are opinion, aim, desire, aversion, and, in one word, whatever affairs are our own. Beyond our power are body, property, reputation, office, and, in one word, whatever are not properly our own affairs.

Now, the things within our power are by nature free, unrestricted, unhindered; but those beyond our power are weak, dependent, restricted, alien. Remember, then, that if you attribute freedom to things by nature dependent, and take what belongs to others for you own, you will be hindered, you will lament, you will be disturbed, you will find fault both with gods and men. But if you take for your own only that which is your own, and view what belongs to others just as it really is, then no one will ever compel you, no one will restrict you, you will find fault with no one, you will accuse no one, you will do nothing against your will; no one will hurt you, you will not have an enemy, nor will you suffer any harm.”

The man who wrote this lived 2000 years ago. He was a freed Roman slave from the court of Emperor Nero. This passage, the opening of the Enchiridion, is the core of all Stoic philosophy.

But of what use is philosophy? What use is the love of wisdom? Philosophy offers council and peace of mind for those who seek such wisdom.

Had Epictetus (Epic-TEE-tus) the Roman ex-slave, been born in our time he may have been a different man. His leg had been broken earlier in his life and it left him a cripple. What did this philosopher have to say about his lame leg?

“Lameness is an impediment to the leg, but not to the will; and say this to yourself with regard to everything that happens. For you will find it to be an impediment to something else, but not truly to yourself.”

Our modern victim culture, inspired by womanly anti-values, would reel in horror of such a sentiment. The Stoics would in turn reel in horror of the modern Matriarchy victim culture. They would tell us to not be seduced by appearances and instead to:

“Work, therefore to be able to say to every harsh appearance, "You are but an appearance, and not absolutely the thing you appear to be." And then examine it… by this: whether it concerns the things which are in our own control, or those which are not; and, if it concerns anything not in our control, be prepared to say that it is nothing to you.”

If we accept that only the things which are in our power are important, and the things not within our power are indifferent then we can make progress along the path to Stoic freedom and eudaimonia. For the Stoics morality was not about suffering and ‘thou shalt not’ rules. Instead the aim of all morality was the achievement of human happiness and flourishing on this earth.

Happiness and flourishing, eudaimonia, was achieved by an uncompromising look at the truth about the world and the understanding that only those things which are in our power are truly important to us.

“With regard to whatever objects give you delight, are useful, or are deeply loved, remember to tell yourself of what general nature they are, beginning from the most insignificant things. If, for example, you are fond of a specific ceramic cup, remind yourself that it is only ceramic cups in general of which you are fond. Then, if it breaks, you will not be disturbed. If you kiss your child, or your wife, say that you only kiss things which are mortal, and thus you will not be disturbed if either of them dies.”

The self-help guides, like the Enchiridion, of the ancient Stoics were not the feel-good books polluting today’s book stores. Today’s womanly victim culture is not able to produce the insights that wisdom can provide. Could a modern text ever offer such advice regarding death:

“Never say of anything, "I have lost it"; but, "I have returned it." Is your child dead? It is returned. Is your wife dead? She is returned. Is your estate taken away? Well, and is not that likewise returned? "But he who took it away is a bad man." What difference is it to you who the giver assigns to take it back? While he gives it to you to possess, take care of it; but don't view it as your own, just as travelers view a hotel.”

The poison of the Matriarchy and the anti-philosophy of feminism has nearly swallowed Western Civilization whole. We can see this in our daily lives and in the greater power womanly-nonsense continues to gain. It is the great shame of the 1960’s that when women were “liberated” they forced their anti-life values on men, instead of women embracing men’s stoic virtues.

Our path has been cleared for us by men who lived in harder times and yet found happiness and serenity thousands of years ago.

We do not need to be ruled by those us tell us ‘they care’ but who in reality dream themselves our masters. We do not need to be ruled by those who tell us that we are not “men” if we do not define ourselves by how many vaginas we have slipped our penises into. We do not need to be ruled by the tyranny of women.

Destroy the Matriarchy, we MUST.

 

[hope7]

your posts are depressing.

 

[Luthor Rex]

your posts are depressing.

The truth isn't depressing. The truth just is.

If we are armed with the knowledge of how the world is then we can know what is in our power to change and then make change for the better.

Much of how we deal with life depends on how we choose to view the appearances around us. If you discovered tomorrow that there is no after-life and oblivion is the only thing that awaits your soul would that make you depressed? Would it cause you unedning torment? Or would it make you realize that you better do something with your life NOW and not wait? Would it make life taste even sweeter and drive you to forget your fears and push ahead with the things you've always wanted to do?

Reality is as it is, it is not in our power to change that. But it is in our power to change how we react to these appearances.

 

[ADifferentKindofDJ]

I can't believe this form is turning to philosophy for help. Here's a philosophy. It's a prayer in case you didn't know:

May I have the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

I took out the god part for those of you who don't believe in that. When you actually get what this is saying, then the path will be presented to you.

ADKdj

P.S. This is what a man knows.

 

[The Brotrain]

Good post but, don't confuse a philosophy with the truth. I find it ironic that you see stoicism as the answer to "victim culture" since it provided the philosophical under pinnings for the "priestly sentiment" that Nietzche railed against in The Geneaology of Morality, because he believed it led to a social culture that lauded the weak over the strong, victims over dominators.

 

[Marlimus]

May I have the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

I hate this fvcking prayer. It is everywhere.

But otherwise, being a fan of Marcus Aurelius, I respect the Stoic philosophy. plus i hate feminism, so its all good.

 

[Luthor Rex]

I can't believe this form is turning to philosophy for help. Here's a philosophy. It's a prayer in case you didn't know:

May I have the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

I took out the god part for those of you who don't believe in that. When you actually get what this is saying, then the path will be presented to you.

ADKdj

P.S. This is what a man knows.

The prayer you quoted has been used by Alcoholics Anonymous for years.

While it was written long after the Stoics were around as a school, the Serenity prayer encapsulates the core of Stoic teaching.

Stoicism was absorbed by Christianity when that religion rose to power. So Stoic thought has been handed down to us, though changed through the filter of Christianity.

Stoic thought still influences the Western world to this day, just in subtler forms. In fact a professor at the U.S. Naval Academy has argued quite convincingly that Stoic thought is the ancient philosophy behind the military mind.

This connection isn't that hard to make considering that Admiral Stockdale used the teachings of the Stoics to help him and his fellow prisoners make it though the years spent as a POW in a Vietnam prison.

Would you really know what philosophy offers humanity? Philosophy offers counsel. -Seneca

 

[Luthor Rex]

Good post but, don't confuse a philosophy with the truth. I find it ironic that you see stoicism as the answer to "victim culture" since it provided the philosophical under pinnings for the "priestly sentiment" that Nietzche railed against in The Geneaology of Morality, because he believed it led to a social culture that lauded the weak over the strong, victims over dominators.

Don't confuse philosophy with the truth? Philosophy is the love of widom. Philosophy seeks nothing but the truth. Science, our best guide to truth about this world, stands upon a structure built up by philosophy. Don't confuse philosophy with the modern ivory tower thinking that goes on in too many universities.

I can see how Nietzche would belive that stoic thought did influence the "priestly sentiment." When stoic thought was absorbed by Chrisianity it was used by the Desert Fathers to help flesh out their new religion. Discipline given to monks was based on stoic thought. The Eight Deadly Sins (which became Seven under Pope Gregory) were created by the monk Evagrius who was in turn influenced by the Stoic school. But let's not confuse the stoic ideas that were twisted by Christianity with what the original Stoics had to say.

I leave you with a thought for the day:

Inner Excellence Matters More Than Outer Appearance


Females are especially burdened by the attention they receive for their pleasing appearance. From the time they are young, they are flattered by males or evaluated only in terms of their ovtward appearance.

Unfortunately, this can make a woman feel suited only to give men pleasure, and her true inner gifts sadly atrophy. She may feel compelled to put great effort and time into enhancing her outer beauty and distorting her natural self to please others. Sadly, many people – both men and women – place all their emphasis on managing their physical appearance and the impression they make on others.

Those who seek wisdom come to understand that even though the world may reward us for wrong or superficial reasons, such as our physical appearance, the family we come from, and so on, what really matters is who we are inside and who we are becoming.

-- Epictetus: The Art of Living

 

[Stoic_Mo]

Beautiful post. Im glad others have found out about Stoicism... It has helped me become a better man (along with this site). props.

 

[Luveno]

My prayer

I will have the courage
To change the things I want to be changed
To never accept what cannot be changed now
for with enough determination, it will be changed as I see fit
And to never be changed or controlled
By a will that is not my own
For I am the only master
Of my reality

 

[Nzo]

Did you make that up yourself Luveno?

 

[Luveno]

Yeah, right now.
But its the way one should live.

 

[ADifferentKindofDJ]

point taken all of you. I'll look into stoic thought more.

 

[Stoic_Mo]

Here are some quotes from my favourite Stoic- Seneca the Younger:

An unpopular rule is never long maintained.

As was his language so was his life.

Be not too hasty either with praise or blame; speak always as though you were giving evidence before the judgement-seat of the Gods.

Be silent as to services you have rendered, but speak of favours you have received.

Consult your friend on all things, especially on those which respect yourself. His counsel may then be useful where your own self-love might impair your judgment.

Dangerous is wrath concealed. Hatred proclaimed doth lose its chance of wreaking vengeance.

Delay not; swift the flight of fortune's greatest favours.

Desultory reading is delightful, but to be beneficial, our reading must be carefully directed.

Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.

Enjoy present pleasures in such a way as not to injure future ones.

Fate rules the affairs of mankind with no recognizable order.

He who spares the wicked injures the good.

He will live ill who does not know how to die well.

I do not distinguish by the eye, but by the mind, which is the proper judge.

I shall never be ashamed of citing a bad author if the line is good.

If a man does not know to what port he is steering, no wind is favourable.

If virtue precede us- every step will be safe.

It is a denial of justice not to stretch out a helping hand to the fallen; that is the common right of humanity.

It is a great thing to know the season for speech and the season for silence.

It is a youthful failing to be unable to control one's impulses.

It is easier to exclude harmful passions than to rule them, and to deny them admittance than to control them after they have been admitted.

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.

It is pleasant at times to play the madman.

It is rash to condemn where you are ignorant.

It is the sign of a weak mind to be unable to bear wealth.

It should be our care not so much to live a long life as a satisfactory one.

Let tears flow of their own accord: their flowing is not inconsistent with inward peace and harmony.

-Seneca

 

[Stoic_Mo]

I'll leave this thread with one more list of quotes...

It is often better not to see an insult than to avenge it.

There are none more abusive to others than they that lie most open to it themselves; but the humor goes round, and he that laughs at me today will have somebody to laugh at him tomorrow.

We become wiser by adversity; prosperity destroys our appreciation of the right.

The good things of prosperity are to be wished; but the good things that belong to adversity are to be admired.

Consult your friend on all things, especially on those which respect yourself. His counsel may then be useful where your own self-love might impair your judgment.

He who boasts of his ancestry praises the merits of another.

To strive with an equal is dangerous; with a superior, mad; with an inferior, degrading.

This body is not a home but an inn, and that only briefly.

Calamity is virtue's opportunity.

Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful to us than the injury that provokes it.

All cruelty springs from hard-heartedness and weakness.

A punishment to some, to some a gift, and to many a favor.

Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.

No evil propensity of the human heart is so powerful that it may not be subdued by discipline.

Fate leads the willing and drags along the unwilling.

Call it Nature, Fate, Fortune; all these are names of the one and selfsame God.

It goes far toward making a man faithful to let him understand that you think him so; and he that does but suspect I will deceive him gives me a sort of right to do it.

What difference does it make how much you have? What you do not have amounts to much more.

Our plans miscarry because they have no aim. When a man does not know what harbor he is making for, no wind is the right wind.

It is another's fault if he be ungrateful, but it is mine if I do not give. To find one thankful man, I will oblige a great many that are not so.

There is as much greatness of mind in acknowledging a good turn, as in doing it.

To greed, all nature is insufficient.

Every guilty person is his own hangman.

Whom they have injured, they also hate.

To wish to be well is a part of becoming well.

I will govern my life and thoughts as if the whole world were to see the one and read the other, for what does it signify to make anything a secret to my neighbor, when to God, who is the searcher of our hearts, all our privacies are open?.

Nothing becomes so offensive so quickly as grief. When fresh it finds someone to console it, but when it becomes chronic, it is ridiculed, and rightly.

The cure for anger is delay.

It is a rough road that leads to the heights of greatness.

A man who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than is necessary.

Life is a play. It's not its length, but its performance that counts.

Let us train our minds to desire what the situation demands.

Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power.

If wisdom were offered me with the provision that I should keep it shut up and refrain from declaring it, I should refuse. There's no delight in owning anything unshared.

The fates lead him who will- him who won't they drag.

No man can live happily who regards himself alone, who turns everything to his own advantage. Thou must live for another, if thou wishest to live for thyself.

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

The foremost art of kings is the ability to endure hatred.

It is better, of course, to know useless things than to know nothing.

No evil is without its compensation. The less money, the less trouble; the less favor, the less envy. Even in those cases which put us out of wits, it is not the loss itself, but the estimate of the loss that troubles us.

Fidelity purchased with money, money can destroy.

It is proof of a bad cause when it is applauded by the mob.

It is the sign of a great mind to dislike greatness, and prefer things in measure to things in excess.

Everywhere is nowhere. When a person spends all his time in foreign travel, he ends by having many acquaintances, but no friends.

What were once vices are the fashion of the day.

He who is brave is free.

If you wish to be loved, love.

Anger: an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

I also like stoism alot and I think this thread is the single most valuable one on this board.

 

[Unregistered]

I started researching Stoicism after I read Tom Wolfe's A Man in Full.

As far as a philosophy, it's really easy to get into because there aren't any abstract metaphysical concepts, just simple ways to live a better life. It's the ultimate masculine philosophy.

Just imagine if your happiness was affected by only you. Imagine how simple your life would be and how empowered you yourself would be. I'm nowhere near the level of a true Stoic, but simply applying some of these concepts to my life has already improved it tremendously. Now I look at events that I normally considered "bad" as opportunities to test myself and my willpower.

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

I started researching Stoicism after I read Tom Wolfe's A Man in Full.

Me too man, me too.

Great book.

 

[Luthor Rex]

Just imagine if your happiness was affected by only you. Imagine how simple your life would be and how empowered you yourself would be. I'm nowhere near the level of a true Stoic, but simply applying some of these concepts to my life has already improved it tremendously. Now I look at events that I normally considered "bad" as opportunities to test myself and my willpower.

Sometimes Stoic writings can come off as harsh or even doom & gloom. But some of the fundamental things that the Stoics teach are anything but harsh or gloomy:

- The most important part of you, your soul or will or mind or whatever you wish to call it, is fundamentally invulnrable. Only you can hurt your soul.

- Happiness is a choice and you have the choice to be happy and florish.

- There will be difficulties in your life but, because of your human nature, you will never be shouldered with a burden you can't handle.

There are others but I am no sage and the Stoa has not existed for a long time so the wisdom here may not be as robust as it could. All we have left of them are the writings of the authors who saw their civilization from three different levels:

The Slave

The Lawyer

The Emperor

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

Theres nothing gloomy about stoism, the central goal is to be happy and the central thesis is that this goal depends only on yourself, so it is completely in your control.