Do you married guys miss game?

[zekko]

Wow, Backbreaker, sounds like you were mainly using the girls for a big ego boost and validation. I agree with you though, the sex is not that big of a deal, I don't know why they blow it up into something of such great importance here.

I also admit, if I'm with a girl, I want her to think I'm the number one guy, I want to be the first choice. Why settle for less?

The pool of undesireables though, that is not something I care to deal with.

 

[speed dawg]

Wow, Backbreaker, sounds like you were mainly using the girls for a big ego boost and validation.

Just getting to know backbreaker, huh?

 

[backbreaker]

Wow, Backbreaker, sounds like you were mainly using the girls for a big ego boost and validation. I agree with you though, the sex is not that big of a deal, I don't know why they blow it up into something of such great importance here.

I also admit, if I'm with a girl, I want her to think I'm the number one guy, I want to be the first choice. Why settle for less?

The pool of undesirables though, that is not something I care to deal with.

at the end of the day that's what everyone does. I"m just honest about it.

Because after you have satisfied your natural need for sex that's really all that is left. I'm not going to sit here and pretend i don't like or care about female companionship. I like women wanting me just like I like being able to take my shirt off and have abs or being able to drive a nice car.

do not confuse what i am saying as me saying that's how I feel good about myself. I feel good about myself because I like who I am, I like what I do and I do what I set out ot do for the most part. But if you are going to play the game,k you play the game to win you don't' play the game just to say you played. guys who say stupid **** like oh i'm just using women to have fun and i am not going to put any expectations on any of my interactions with women sounds like the coach that coaches the 6th place team in the little league baseball summer league.

If I am going to date, my goal is to have her submit to what i want her to do on my terms, nothign less.

 

[zekko]

Just getting to know backbreaker, huh?

Lol.

at the end of the day that's what everyone does. I"m just honest about it.

Because after you have satisfied your natural need for sex that's really all that is left. I'm not going to sit here and pretend i don't like or care about female companionship. I like women wantg me just like I like being able to take my shirt off and have abs or being able to drive a nice car.

Right, but there are a lot of guys here who want deny the "validation" end of it. And "female companionship" is almost never talked about. Except for the guys who say that there is no reason to spend time with a woman (aside from sex) because they never say anything interesting and don't like sports and whatnot.

Sex is a natural urge and that's always going to be there.
But it does make you feel good to have a woman like you and invest in you. Like you say, why play the game if you're not going to play to win? Sex and female companionship are two sides of the same coin, and I enjoy both. Female companionship is unique compared to friendship with males.

While it's true that you should not take your self esteem from a woman, if no woman ever gave me the time of day I doubt that I would be too pleased with being stuck in that situation. As you say, it's good to have female companionship, just as it's good to be able to support yourself and have nice things.

 

[samspade]

Right, but there are a lot of guys here who want deny the "validation" end of it. And "female companionship" is almost never talked about. Except for the guys who say that there is no reason to spend time with a woman (aside from sex) because they never say anything interesting and don't like sports and whatnot.

Sex is a natural urge and that's always going to be there.
But it does make you feel good to have a woman like you and invest in you. Like you say, why play the game if you're not going to play to win? Sex and female companionship are two sides of the same coin, and I enjoy both. Female companionship is unique compared to friendship with males.

While it's true that you should not take your self esteem from a woman, if no woman ever gave me the time of day I doubt that I would be too pleased with being stuck in that situation. As you say, it's good to have female companionship, just as it's good to be able to support yourself and have nice things.

People don't want to admit that they are motivated by ego, but everything we do feeds our ego in some way. Even "selfless" acts make us feel good. Civilization as we know it would not exist if mankind had subscribed to the idea that sex and companionship are unnecessary.

Plus you see a lot of guys complaining about modern women, because they don't signal their desperate innate desire to be with and love a man. But they don't want to admit that it gives them emotional pleasure to be liked or loved by a woman. Don't get me wrong, I understand what sh!t tests are and that game mitigates them - that's part of the dance. But there is so much bitterness among both sexes that it is kind of pathetic to see how unwilling they are to admit that they need each other.

 

[backbreaker]

i can't go so far as to say I NEED a woman. that i can't say. But i will agree that my life is defiantly more enjoyable with one than without one. but at the same time i can find some enjoyment even satisfaction without one just not the same kind.

 

[Reyaj]

Whether you all want to admit it or not.... most of you will cheat at some point in your marriage. I say its almost inevitable...

There's a line that Rollo said about marriage that really resonates with me.... I'm paraphrasing here... but it basically goes something along the lines of "There is no objective advantage for a male to get married"

A guy gives up everything (time, freedom, polygamy(if you dare try) to support a woman. For those of you who will attack me on this by referring to the companion aspect of it etc.... remember I am talking about "marriage" here, not an LTR. You are signing yourself into a government contract per say.... if it doesn't work out you lose half your assets

How is marriage more beneficial to a man than a committed LTR? Nobody on this board has been able answer this substantially.

 

[samspade]

How is marriage more beneficial to a man than a committed LTR? Nobody on this board has been able answer this substantially.

That's an argument for another thread. Actually it's been done to death. The consensus is that it's not more beneficial.

 

[Reyaj]

That's an argument for another thread. Actually it's been done to death. The consensus is that it's not more beneficial.

I agree, I was just referencing it. Do you agree/disagree with my cheating theory? This is the result of Married Men missing game...

 

[samspade]

I agree, I was just referencing it. Do you agree/disagree with my cheating theory? This is the result of Married Men missing game...

Good question. I don't believe it is inevitable, but I agree that every married man will find himself in that situation sooner or later whether he misses game or not. He still has a choice to make. And from a cynical standpoint there is always the question "Is it worth it?" Is a few minutes of pleasure (at the very least) worth potentially sabotaging your marriage? Sure, there is always the chance no one finds out, but it's hard to cheat in a vacuum.

I'm a big fan of keeping things simple, so I'd like to think that if I encountered a dilemma like this, I'd choose to end my marriage before cheating. I can't deal with lying and sneaking around - just the effort alone is more than I can handle. I guess I'm always considering variables when examining A--->B.

 

[backbreaker]

I will say this.

I will preface this by saying I am crazy about my wife and love her very very much. she is still drop dead gorgeous and i have no desire or intention of cheating on her. I do not believe in soul mates but as far as staying with someone for the rest of my life, if that is going to happen she is dfinatly the one i would have the best chance with. if it doesn't work with her it's just not going to work for me lol because she fits me like a glove in all aspects of my life. she makes me laugh, she makes me happy, she doesn't bust my balls (most of the time at least) over stupid ****, she even does **** that i know she doesn't like doing beucase she knows i like doing it like going to college football games.

and note, my wife reads this forum i amv ery sure she will read this. we have ahd this talk before, i'm not saying anything we haven't already talked about.

now with that out the way, let's talk about cheating.,

the way i see it, you have 2 different classifications of cheating.

you have what i call long term cheating and short term cheating. It's important to make this ditinction beucase regardless of what woman says not all cheating is equal.

Long term cheating is say you work at... i don't know, apple, in the accounting part of the business. you go to wokr every day, there is a girl at work who has taken an interest in you. she is different from your wife, she knows you are marired ands till wants you. one thing leads to another and it gets sexual. she likes you and wants to keep seeing you, you keep seeing her going behind your wife's back

short term cheating is say, your wife is out of town to visit her parents and you had to stay back becuase you had something that could not be missed. you want tog et out the house you go to the pub you see a gilr there who is visiting from out of town, you hook up, you never call her again.


iMHO, long term cheating is something i could never do. the reason being is that, for me to get in into a long term cheating mode, i am basically living another life. honestly it's not even about the lying ican lie if it's in my best interest to do so and will lol. it's just.. if i am that unhappy in that marriage to continue to see this woman, then oblivious something in my own personal life is not right and i am not happy. in other words, i would not happen because i would not let my life get to that point in the first place. if i am that unhappy i am just going to leave my wife so she never has to worry about me carrying on an affair.

short term cheating, i'll be honest, i could see it happening. i travel a lot. sometimes without her. i'm not going to say i am never going to do something. But i can say that i have not really wanted to. i've had chances. But the will just is not there right now. i'm a very happy man, and i can go a few days without some poon. I will be 29 next sunday, now i am 39 and my wife is 44 and some 26 year old is hitting on me when i am out of town for something, i don't' know i can't predict the future and i'm not going to try. I just know that as of yet i really have not had the motive or will.

she thinks i have cheated on her before like that. not for any specific reason, just the matter that i do travel a lot and she thinks that i mgiht have or have hooked up with another girl while out. one of the reasons we click so well is because she is very pragmatic, more so than most women. she's not the type of woman that would get too pissy if i stuck oreo cookie in the milk one day as long as it was just that, one day, and as long as i did not keep going to the grocery store to keep buying more milk. she knows i love her very much. and oddly enough, that's really what takes the will out of it.

and honestly, if i am 44 and she is 49 and some 30 year old gym instructior gives her the business, i really don't think i would be all that up in arms. i really don't, because it's just sex. i know how she feels about me. she is totally devoted to me and her/our son. a guy finding her hot and fvcking her brains out once isn't going to change that. nor would some 22 year old leggy red head hitting on me and me plowing her for sport fvcking purposes when i am 38 years old is going to change the way i feel about my wife.

PS- no zerko i am not setting the stage for me cheating later in life. quite the opposite actually. i am a betting man and if i had to make a wager right now on if i would cheat on my wife i would take the under. but i can'te tell you how i am going to act when i am 39 or 49 beucase i have never been 39 or 49 and i am not so stuck on myself where i am so zealous to where i am going to tell you what i am not going to do 10 years from now. all i can tell you is where i have been and where i am and i have not cheated yet, and really have not had any interest to.. i got all my sport fvcking done before i met her and have no real desire to do such.. if she continues to be who she is now i would predict i won't cheat. but just that, predict.

 

[samspade]

i got all my sport fvcking done before i met her and have no real desire to do such.

Same here. Like I said, it's not so much about the sex. Sometimes I just miss creating attraction and things like that. I already know I can fukk whomever I want if I put my mind to it. But the game - the game was fun.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Game doesn't end after marriage. In fact it's more vital that you understand and employ it effectively with your wife than any plates you may be spinning. It may change context, but Game never ends, because hypergamy never ends.

Whether you choose to play or not is irrelevant, you're still in the Game.

 

[The Duke]

..........spoken like a true veteran.

 

[samspade]

Game doesn't end after marriage. In fact it's more vital that you understand and employ it effectively with your wife than any plates you may be spinning. It may change context, but Game never ends, because hypergamy never ends.

Whether you choose to play or not is irrelevant, you're still in the Game.

Well that is true in and of itself and I do believe it. So I suppose I was only missing "game" in the "single life" sense. As for employing it in my marriage, it's still just as relevant as ever, although of course there are adjustments day to day from how I used it when I was single.