Give us some examples of what YOU consider c+f, cuz I dont see anything condescending about it. Even if it was, who cares? Its not condescending if its a lighthearted joke.
Don't make fun of anything obvious about her that she can't change, like being too tall. Tease her about something that can be easily changed, like a purse or a pair of shoes. The key is to make it a light-hearted joke that actually is funny.
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