in the future ill be going on some coffee dates. how do i incorporate kino into these situations? also how long should these coffee dates be? also i need some like stories that i can tell to her or something...preferably funny ones. im a good actor ill make it seem like it happend.<----- or is even doin that right?bah
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coffe dates and kino:how?
- Thread starter syemour
- Start date
Well I have an idea, why don't you get one of your Iwanttobeawriter buddys to write you out a script. Add some funny characters, an unusual setting, and a plot. Tell her a funny story involving lube and masterbation. try to seem like that happend.
Getting kino on coffee dates is horridly difficult. Especially if you are (obviously) face to face. So you could maybe touch her with your feet. But that is used on women youve allready have ¨something¨ with them, or with total wh0res.
So, why not go on something thats actually fun, and involves touching?
So, why not go on something thats actually fun, and involves touching?
Starman
Master Don Juan
I have been on coffee dates before..I arrived early , plugged my laptop into the outlet..then later into the night I would ask
"So, wanna read and critique a little of my work?"
She would say YES (trust me)
Then, turn the laptop TOWARDS her..go stand behind her..as she is reading the monitor, then kind whisk her on the shoulders, arms..as you are "preparing the laptop"
there isnt alot of time for KINO..but that should be a start..you could even pull up a chair REALLY close to hers
make sure its interesting tho..otherwise it would bore her..
"So, wanna read and critique a little of my work?"
She would say YES (trust me)
Then, turn the laptop TOWARDS her..go stand behind her..as she is reading the monitor, then kind whisk her on the shoulders, arms..as you are "preparing the laptop"
there isnt alot of time for KINO..but that should be a start..you could even pull up a chair REALLY close to hers
make sure its interesting tho..otherwise it would bore her..
ZeeOwl
Senior Don Juan
Wow! That's a fabulous idea. I've been (and will be) on a lot of coffee dates. Almost makes me wanna trade in my flat-panel iMac for a PowerBook.
myfriendblu
Master Don Juan
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Do an old search on coffe dates or my old posts. I have been an advocate for them for quite along time. In fact, the article written recently on this site was basically ripped out of a post I did awile back.
Anyways, don't even worry about kino on a coffee date. There supposed to be short quick and to the point. A coffee date is basically like an interview. Your interviewing your date for a STR or a possible LTR. Get in, absorb as much info as you can, get a solid idea on IL and a concept of how much the girl ranks on the Give-take scale and get an idea on her morality. Then get out, spending as little time and money as possible.
Im gonna dig up my old post or do a big one soon on this.
Anyways, don't even worry about kino on a coffee date. There supposed to be short quick and to the point. A coffee date is basically like an interview. Your interviewing your date for a STR or a possible LTR. Get in, absorb as much info as you can, get a solid idea on IL and a concept of how much the girl ranks on the Give-take scale and get an idea on her morality. Then get out, spending as little time and money as possible.
Im gonna dig up my old post or do a big one soon on this.
Starman
Master Don Juan
blu,
what do you mean a coffee date is supposed to be like an interview???
the most uncomfortable situation on any date is the feeling that you are being interviewed
here is a letter from David D..about coffee dates..I agree
The first thing to remember when you're meeting
up with a girl for "a date" is that it's NOT an
INTERVIEW.
You're not applying for a job (and neither is
she), so don't act like it.
It's so funny to me when I sit down in a
restaurant and I hear a couple that's obviously
out on their first date... and the guy has no idea
what to do.
It sounds like this:
"So, did you grow up around here?"
"Where did you go to school?"
"Do you have brothers and sisters?"
"What kinds of things do you like to do for fun?"
Painful.
Why is it that people tend to act like they're
on job interviews when they go out on dates?
It's just such the not-right thing to do.
I mean, no wonder women sit around with each
other and complain about how hard it is to find an
interesting guy in this world.
Here's a good rule of thumb:
ONLY ASK QUESTIONS OR TALK ABOUT COMMON,
BORING, PREDICTABLE TOPICS LIKE SCHOOL, WORK AND
FAMILY IF YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY RUN OUT OF ALL OTHER
OPTIONS.
And why is this?
Good question. And I'm glad you asked.
First, let's talk about WHY most guys allow the
conversation to turn to these ultra-boring
topics...
Most guys approach a first date from the
perspective of "I don't want to screw this up".
In other words, they try to play it safe and
ot do anything or say anything that the girl might
not like.
They try to present themselves as "nice guys"
who love mom, have a good job, and are stable.
Somehow, guys have gotten the idea that if they
act nice, buy dinner, and talk about the same old
things that everyone else uses to bore women to
tears that they might get lucky and score (or at
least get a kiss and a second opportunity to buy
dinner).
I don't know where this concept came from, but
it's just not a very effective approach.
WOMEN AREN'T ATTRACTED TO THE SAME OLD SAME
OLD, BORING, PREDICTABLE CONVERSATION.
Attraction happens when there is energy, spice,
humor, mystery... ****Y AND FUNNY... and saucy.
So if you want to create ATTRACTION instead of
BOREDOM, you're going to have to learn a new way.
You're going to have to learn to talk about
something else.
The trick to not talking about the "usual"
things is to know how to make conversation
INTERESTING.
Let me ask you, what are the most INTERESTING
topics to humans in general?
Right - drama, violence, scandal, and comedy
that is painful to one of the parties involved.
Here are a few good ideas for conversation that
come to mind:
"So what's with The Osbournes being MTV's #1 show
of all time? I guess people just can't get enough
of dysfunctional family life... they have to watch
it on TV too."
"I'm so bummed that J-Lo and Ben are on the rocks.
They were so damn cute together. I was hoping that
they'd have a daughter with perfect hair and a
bedonka donk butt from birth."
"Have you tuned into this "Cheaters" TV show?
Don't you just love it when they come storming
into someone's house and catch the wife in bed
with another guy on national TV?"
These topics will light up a conversation like
nobody's business. And they create all kinds of
opportunities to be ****y and funny while talking
about the misfortunes andneurotic behavior of
others.
The trick is that you must remember you're not
there to impress her, and you're not on a job
interview.
The more you act nervous, stilted, and
uncomfortable...like you're trying to impress her
and get her approval... and like you don't want to
say anything that might make her disapprove of
you, the less likely you are to trigger that all-
important ATTRACTION inside of her.
And here's a real twist on this theme:
If SHE starts asking the "normal" questions
about school, job, family, etc. this is a perfect
opportunity to bust on her and say "What, is this
a job interview?"
Or "Can't you think of something interesting to
talk about? Please, spare me the pain of the usual
school-job-family conversation. Let's save that
until we're picking names for our kids."
Here are a few other good ideas for
conversation:
1) History. Women love to hear stories about the
historyof places. If you're in an interesting part
of town, tell her the story of how the area came
to be named, or why the city was built where it
is. And if the story involves a tale of love
and/or scandal, all the better.
2) Anything superficial, classy, and basically
meaningless. Try learning a little about fashion,
this way you can make fun of it while acting like
you know what you're talking about. "Didn't
Madonna really screw up the fashion world with
this whole over-the-top fake cowboy look thing?"
3) Comedy Psychological Analysis. Have fun by
giving your wild perspective on others. "You know,
I've been trying to figure out why so many people
these days are going postal and shooting everyone.
I think it might be all the NSYNC, Britney Spears,
and Backstreet Boys on the radio." This one can be
a lot of fun... be creative.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
If you want to keep her interest, then you have
to be INTERESTING.
The old-fashioned act-like-you're-on-a-job
interview rap just doesn't cut it.
Now, for some guys, the ideas that I've just
talked about will make sense, but they won't come
naturally.
That's OK. You may have to work on this for
awhile, especially if you've spent the last 25 or
so years doing the wrong thing.
Old Proverb: "No matter how far down the wrong
road you've gone, TURN BACK."
So remember, attraction isn't a choice. And
attraction doesn't make logical sense. If you want
to create that magical "chemistry", then you're
going to have to LEARN and PRACTICE it.
what do you mean a coffee date is supposed to be like an interview???
the most uncomfortable situation on any date is the feeling that you are being interviewed
here is a letter from David D..about coffee dates..I agree
The first thing to remember when you're meeting
up with a girl for "a date" is that it's NOT an
INTERVIEW.
You're not applying for a job (and neither is
she), so don't act like it.
It's so funny to me when I sit down in a
restaurant and I hear a couple that's obviously
out on their first date... and the guy has no idea
what to do.
It sounds like this:
"So, did you grow up around here?"
"Where did you go to school?"
"Do you have brothers and sisters?"
"What kinds of things do you like to do for fun?"
Painful.
Why is it that people tend to act like they're
on job interviews when they go out on dates?
It's just such the not-right thing to do.
I mean, no wonder women sit around with each
other and complain about how hard it is to find an
interesting guy in this world.
Here's a good rule of thumb:
ONLY ASK QUESTIONS OR TALK ABOUT COMMON,
BORING, PREDICTABLE TOPICS LIKE SCHOOL, WORK AND
FAMILY IF YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY RUN OUT OF ALL OTHER
OPTIONS.
And why is this?
Good question. And I'm glad you asked.
First, let's talk about WHY most guys allow the
conversation to turn to these ultra-boring
topics...
Most guys approach a first date from the
perspective of "I don't want to screw this up".
In other words, they try to play it safe and
ot do anything or say anything that the girl might
not like.
They try to present themselves as "nice guys"
who love mom, have a good job, and are stable.
Somehow, guys have gotten the idea that if they
act nice, buy dinner, and talk about the same old
things that everyone else uses to bore women to
tears that they might get lucky and score (or at
least get a kiss and a second opportunity to buy
dinner).
I don't know where this concept came from, but
it's just not a very effective approach.
WOMEN AREN'T ATTRACTED TO THE SAME OLD SAME
OLD, BORING, PREDICTABLE CONVERSATION.
Attraction happens when there is energy, spice,
humor, mystery... ****Y AND FUNNY... and saucy.
So if you want to create ATTRACTION instead of
BOREDOM, you're going to have to learn a new way.
You're going to have to learn to talk about
something else.
The trick to not talking about the "usual"
things is to know how to make conversation
INTERESTING.
Let me ask you, what are the most INTERESTING
topics to humans in general?
Right - drama, violence, scandal, and comedy
that is painful to one of the parties involved.
Here are a few good ideas for conversation that
come to mind:
"So what's with The Osbournes being MTV's #1 show
of all time? I guess people just can't get enough
of dysfunctional family life... they have to watch
it on TV too."
"I'm so bummed that J-Lo and Ben are on the rocks.
They were so damn cute together. I was hoping that
they'd have a daughter with perfect hair and a
bedonka donk butt from birth."
"Have you tuned into this "Cheaters" TV show?
Don't you just love it when they come storming
into someone's house and catch the wife in bed
with another guy on national TV?"
These topics will light up a conversation like
nobody's business. And they create all kinds of
opportunities to be ****y and funny while talking
about the misfortunes andneurotic behavior of
others.
The trick is that you must remember you're not
there to impress her, and you're not on a job
interview.
The more you act nervous, stilted, and
uncomfortable...like you're trying to impress her
and get her approval... and like you don't want to
say anything that might make her disapprove of
you, the less likely you are to trigger that all-
important ATTRACTION inside of her.
And here's a real twist on this theme:
If SHE starts asking the "normal" questions
about school, job, family, etc. this is a perfect
opportunity to bust on her and say "What, is this
a job interview?"
Or "Can't you think of something interesting to
talk about? Please, spare me the pain of the usual
school-job-family conversation. Let's save that
until we're picking names for our kids."
Here are a few other good ideas for
conversation:
1) History. Women love to hear stories about the
historyof places. If you're in an interesting part
of town, tell her the story of how the area came
to be named, or why the city was built where it
is. And if the story involves a tale of love
and/or scandal, all the better.
2) Anything superficial, classy, and basically
meaningless. Try learning a little about fashion,
this way you can make fun of it while acting like
you know what you're talking about. "Didn't
Madonna really screw up the fashion world with
this whole over-the-top fake cowboy look thing?"
3) Comedy Psychological Analysis. Have fun by
giving your wild perspective on others. "You know,
I've been trying to figure out why so many people
these days are going postal and shooting everyone.
I think it might be all the NSYNC, Britney Spears,
and Backstreet Boys on the radio." This one can be
a lot of fun... be creative.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
If you want to keep her interest, then you have
to be INTERESTING.
The old-fashioned act-like-you're-on-a-job
interview rap just doesn't cut it.
Now, for some guys, the ideas that I've just
talked about will make sense, but they won't come
naturally.
That's OK. You may have to work on this for
awhile, especially if you've spent the last 25 or
so years doing the wrong thing.
Old Proverb: "No matter how far down the wrong
road you've gone, TURN BACK."
So remember, attraction isn't a choice. And
attraction doesn't make logical sense. If you want
to create that magical "chemistry", then you're
going to have to LEARN and PRACTICE it.
Hi
i think myfriendblu meant that it was a "first step" to see if you even like each other...testing the waters so to speak. Not an ACTUAL interview This way you don't have to put so much pressure on kino.
i think myfriendblu meant that it was a "first step" to see if you even like each other...testing the waters so to speak. Not an ACTUAL interview
This way you don't have to put so much pressure on kino.myfriendblu
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2003
- Messages
- 907
- Reaction score
- 0
Exactly Tantric,
thats pretty much what I meant. I know where ya coming from starman, abou the usual babble style interviewing that the FEMALE usually does on a date to find a suitable guy.
This is a bit different, and more complex and advanced. You still have to be calm, cool and DJ-like during your coffee date. BUT, you wanna get as much info about the girl in as short time as possible. You don't have to do this by just firing off questions. In fact, by just having a simple convo, you can pretty much judge a girls
1. IL
2. Morality-trust factors
3. Her rating on the give-take scale
4. Overall value as a STR or LTR
thats pretty much what I meant. I know where ya coming from starman, abou the usual babble style interviewing that the FEMALE usually does on a date to find a suitable guy.
This is a bit different, and more complex and advanced. You still have to be calm, cool and DJ-like during your coffee date. BUT, you wanna get as much info about the girl in as short time as possible. You don't have to do this by just firing off questions. In fact, by just having a simple convo, you can pretty much judge a girls
1. IL
2. Morality-trust factors
3. Her rating on the give-take scale
4. Overall value as a STR or LTR
ZeeOwl
Senior Don Juan
I follow your general idea blu. But on the other hand, unless you get some minimal attraction going on during that quicky coffee date (which is from my understanding hard to do without kino), isn't it quite unlikely that you'll get the girl agreeing to a second (real) date?
Could you take a look at the 2 last ones I've been on:
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=38382
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=38587
I'd appreciate your input about them. Oh, neither one has kids, so that may explain their weird behavior.
myfriendblu
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2003
- Messages
- 907
- Reaction score
- 0
Zee!
Hey, I have never been a huge advocate that kino is this above-all be all magic way to seduce women, or even attract them or get them to like you. Kino is NOT gonna get any attraction going on that WAS NOT ALREADY THERE. Kino is like fire. Its sweet if ya wanna burn wood, but unless you get an initial spark going, its useless. What I mean is, you need an initial decent IL from the girl for kino to even work. So if a girl has low IL in you, kino isn't gonna save you at all. In fact, it will make a bad situation even worse by making you look like a desperate creep. Im sure we have seen on the dating shows where a girl has low IL in a guy, yet he still tries the kino thing, and he comes of as pushy and aggressive. I have been there myself.
Now, when you have an established, solid IL from a girl, you got the green light for kino. If a girl has good IL in you, Kino is an unstoppable tool to win her attraction and ultimately, get in her pants.
That being said, this is why Im so AGAINST kino on a coffee date. Going into the date, you don't have a solid idea on her IL. Unless her IL in you is sky-high, which is unlikely since she has known you for 5 minutes, you may come off as pushy. Once you get the skill to rapidly read IL, then you can either go for some kino if its high, preferably either on a second date, or sometimes a later evening same day date(I have pulled this quite a few times). Or, if your getting a low IL or even a so so IL, get out of there as qucikly as possible. This is why I LOVE coffe dates for first dates. Your not dragged threw some long, expensive dinner date which leads to nowhere. Plus, it automatically screens out the professional dater women and the gold diggers looking to score a free expensive dinner.
Like I have said before, you can't do any of this until you learn the ability to effectively read IL. I personally believe, as well as Doc Love, that the ability to read IL is the most important tool a DJ can have in his dating arsonal.
Hey I will apply to your other posts in a bit, this forum is hella slow on my already slow PC.
starman, zeeowl, myfriendblu, thanks a lot for all your guyzez help. Everything thing here is pretty much gold....and to think that i really was going to make it an interview.....glad u guys replied. thx again.