Club/bar dancing

dap

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I fūcking suck at this. I'm not THAT bad i guess--i don't stand out at all (bad or good) and just smile and pretend like I know the words to songs and mostly dance like everyone else. I guess the problem is this: I am super personable and do well game-wise in situations where I can rely on my good social skills and ability to look calm/confident and tease, etc. But, then I go to the club with these same girls who I was gaming very well and I just don't know what the fūck to do on the dance floor. I've grinded with girls a lot so that isn't the problem. Anyone can sway side to side while some girl rubs up on him. And i solo/group dance well enough. It's more the kino/flirty/sexual/playful dancing that I am completely lost on. And these girls are looking at me like they want to dance too, so that isn't the problem.

There are no "club dancing lessons" of course, or else I would take them. Are there general rules to follow? This has been a big sticking point--with my group of friends things often lead to a bar/club dance floor--so I appreciate any advice.
 

Groblin

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dap said:
I fūcking suck at this. I'm not THAT bad i guess--i don't stand out at all (bad or good) and just smile and pretend like I know the words to songs and mostly dance like everyone else. I guess the problem is this: I am super personable and do well game-wise in situations where I can rely on my good social skills and ability to look calm/confident and tease, etc. But, then I go to the club with these same girls who I was gaming very well and I just don't know what the fūck to do on the dance floor. I've grinded with girls a lot so that isn't the problem. Anyone can sway side to side while some girl rubs up on him. And i solo/group dance well enough. It's more the kino/flirty/sexual/playful dancing that I am completely lost on. And these girls are looking at me like they want to dance too, so that isn't the problem.

There are no "club dancing lessons" of course, or else I would take them. Are there general rules to follow? This has been a big sticking point--with my group of friends things often lead to a bar/club dance floor--so I appreciate any advice.
I have no advice really, other than most of the time people at a club are too wasted to really care unless you're horrible at dancing. Waiting for someone with more insight.
 

zinc4

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here's some insight...have some drinks and dance your ass off and don't care how others are dancing.....if you are just trying to blend in and mimick others to play it safe then you are doing it all wrong and plus that is just no fun...

when i used to drink and party a lot more, i could pull almost any girl on the dance floor...it's about going crazy dancing to the music and having fun...simple..don't think about anything just have fun....just start dancing to the music on your own having fun...make the music and having fun more important than the women if that makes any sense..

have you ever heard a great song when you were by yourself and just got lost in the moment and started singing and dancing like crazy?? just like that...like no one else is there and then they will gravitate towards you.............problem is you have to find a club with somewhat good music...none of that BS techno garbage.....i freakin hate techno music in clubs
 

spiegel549

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Club/Bar Dancing is seriously my speciality. I have always felt like either you can dance or you can't...BUT that doesn't mean you can't learn and get a lot better at it.

Look up on youtube how to shuffle. Teach yourself how to shuffle. Its not hard. Repetition, repetition! Also look up on youtube how to freestyle and dance to some of the popular genre of music that they play in the clubs. You would be surprised how much better you can get by practicing at home.

Women want a confident dancer. Even if you aren't pro you can still make a girl feel like you are a pro. Make sure you take the lead, twirl her around, turn around and back your ass into her (a lot of girls love that) grab her hands and put them on your stomach. Just show her your a good time. Women love that!

My bottom line advice is pick a FUN spot, and learn off youtube!!
 

Greasy Pig

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I don't dance unless an awesome song comes on and I can't help myself. Even then I'll probably just dance where I'm standing and maybe grab some chick nearby and give her a couple of twirls. Not on the dancefloor.
99% of my nightclub pickups have been achieved without dancing with the chick, but to each their own. The other 1% basically begged me to hit the dancefloor with them and even then they had to plead with me three or four times before I gave in.
I enjoy dancing and I've been told I'm pretty good but I find the whole concept of taking a girl out to dance on the actual dance floor very old fashioned.
I'd prefer to talk to chicks and spit some game at them without the distraction of being on the d-floor.
Also, what if she thinks my dancing sucks and forms an untrue opinion of me?
Maybe I'm just too self-conscious.
If you have to dance with a chick, learn some basic spin moves and practice them. Nothing turns a girl off more than trying to spin her and fvcking it up.

After you spin her, grab both her hands and bring her in close, all in the same movement.
Either that, or do what a lot of guys on here recommend, learn salsa! I'm tipping chicks would go nuts for that.
 

Mr. Bond

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zinc4 said:
here's some insight...have some drinks and dance your ass off and don't care how others are dancing.....if you are just trying to blend in and mimick others to play it safe then you are doing it all wrong and plus that is just no fun...

when i used to drink and party a lot more, i could pull almost any girl on the dance floor...it's about going crazy dancing to the music and having fun...simple..don't think about anything just have fun....just start dancing to the music on your own having fun...make the music and having fun more important than the women if that makes any sense..

have you ever heard a great song when you were by yourself and just got lost in the moment and started singing and dancing like crazy?? just like that...like no one else is there and then they will gravitate towards you.............problem is you have to find a club with somewhat good music...none of that BS techno garbage.....i freakin hate techno music in clubs
This.

I used to have no idea what to do in dancing situations. So I just tried to copy what everyone else was doing, and I ended up looking really awkward. I didn't have any fun, and neither did anyone I was dancing with.

Then I just stopped giving a fvck. I am not a "skilled" dancer, but it doesn't matter. I go out and have a blast - everyone has their eyes on me. Chicks come up and want to dance with me because I'm not boring like all the other guys.

Find songs you like. Go apesh!t to them. Have fun.
 

Mike32ct

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It's hard to find resources on freestyle club dance because it's too open-ended.

The most I can do is give you some general tips/rules:

1. It's often more comfortable to partner dance than solo dance. Dancing in front of a chick (without touching her) is actually harder for a newbie because you're more likely to feel self-conscious. Plus, it can look weird if you are both doing VERY different moves AND both off beat (unless you both are just having so much fun you don't give a F lol).

But when you take her hands (or her waist or whatever), you are "linked" to her which helps you a LOT. Even if she or you is way off beat, at least the two of you will be sort of synchronized. This will look better. Plus it forces you to make smaller steps that you are less likely to F up. It keeps you constrained in a good way. Even though you are leading, in a way, she is helping you. I know you can't hold her hand(s) the entire time, but whenever possible, it's easier.

2. Keep the movements small.

3. Learn how to turn her. Yo u tube "inside turn" and "outside turn" for VERY basic turns. Later on, the "merengue cuddle turn" is fun and easy to do using both hands. There's probably some more cool ones in salsa like alternating underarm turns.

4. Practice, practice, practice.

4. Don't make her dizzy, but definitely make her turn here and there. Although making her dizzy saves you money on alcohol. Just kidding lol.
 

badboyjmm

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Anyone can sway side to side while some girl rubs up on him.
I don't agree to that, simply because two peoples that can't grind probably looks awful in my eyes (especiallyl if they are off-beat). 2 step is your best friend. Easy and the girl can follow. As the others said, practice, practice, practice.

The more practice and the more you are confident in your moves.

Have fun.
 

dap

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Apparently my dancing isn't SO bad because I was told that "all my friends are obsessed with you" the next morning. Still, I have a LOT to improve on.
 

Who Dares Win

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I believe the problem with dancing is very related to your self consciuosness thats why I suggest to go heavy on alchool if you can afford it and make sure the dance floor is crowded enough, plus enjoy fast paced songs since they make it easy for you to just move like a crazy motherfvcker instead of a melodic dancer.

I mostly use to the dancing to manhandle the girl, throw her around or gently spalnd her ass or grab her boobs...its more like a dirty dancing than dancing.

In all honesty people which is very cerebral or is not "made" for that hardly can become good enough to get the "approval seal" from modern girls, the required minimum line just got too high in the last decade.

Dancing can make or break a deal, if u're very good thats enough to win her over while if you suck at it, it could mess up the work done before.

I suggest alchool again cause u can blame it for your mistakes, either dancing or over touching her, you save face and she "rationalize" so u dont get screwn up.
 

Gunner26

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Meh dancing isn't that big a deal really. As everyobdy else says the trick is to have fun.

The holding hands advice was spot on, as well as twirls. *****es love twirls.

In terms of teasing a girl and being flirty, I've found facial expressions help loads while your dancing. A cheeky over the top exagerrated glance at her body while she's doing some move followed by a smile of approval, that you like what you see, normally works for me. I think that ones more about having the personality to pull it off though.

Gunner
 

dap

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Thanks for the tips bros. went out again tonight and drank a little more, acted a little crazier, got more into the music, and danced better. Grabbed girls hands, spun them around, etc. imma keep hitting this scene so I improve. Cheers!
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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Dance because you want to, not because you think it will get girls. Then you will never have to worry about how well you dance.
 

runner83

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TillTheEndOfTime said:
Dance because you want to, not because you think it will get girls. Then you will never have to worry about how well you dance.
This. Girls can tell the difference if you are doing it because you enjoy it, or if you are just looking to hook up.

If you are out there enjoying yourself and are a reasonable looker, it's amazing how often a GIRL will grab YOU to dance and some sloppy make out that sometimes progresses to fingering her in a convenient corner where everyone can't see, or taking her home.
 

dap

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Just an observation:the advice on this thread seems to be the exception to a few "rules" of pick up that I always see mentioned. Usually, people in the manosphere say to NOT drink a lot. And the "just dance and go crazy and not care what others think" advice sounds an awful lot like the "just be yourself" BS. I'm not disagreeing, just noticing that these rules don't seem to apply as much here.
 

Who Dares Win

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dap said:
Just an observation:the advice on this thread seems to be the exception to a few "rules" of pick up that I always see mentioned. Usually, people in the manosphere say to NOT drink a lot. And the "just dance and go crazy and not care what others think" advice sounds an awful lot like the "just be yourself" BS. I'm not disagreeing, just noticing that these rules don't seem to apply as much here.
I believe the difference depends on the setting, if you are on a rave party where everybody is drunk and behaving like a monkey, the advise of not drinking will only make it different from you to fit in there, you will feel not at your ease and other will feel bad by seeing you sober while they're tipsy.

While at the house party where people is more or the less under control, being tipsy will critically increase the chance you do something inappropriate or even risk the creepy label according to your behaviour.

The only time Im totally sure you have to keep the alchool at the minimum is when you hit the target and its just a matter of time till you bang her, alchool in small amount relax you and make you work better but a little too much and your soldier down there cant go to war.

As a general rule I suggest to be tipsy about the same level of others around you or better yet a little bit less just to make sure you still think while at the same time are not too self conscious.
 

Chamber36

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you all seem to be making such a big deal out of this.

OP should just NOT DANCE if he doesn't like the music. If he finds music he likes he should have a few beers and loosen up, and the music will make him move by himself. Also, swaying around the place is pretty much all I do when I hit the club unless I really dig the music, and then I will just do whatever the fvck I wanna do. I don't go all out crazy headbanging or anything. I just party.

Listen, you can't party unless you're having fun. So make sure you have friends, good music, alcohol, maybe weed and women. Then just have fun and escalate!
 

LiveFreeX

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Go to a rave and ask someone there to teach you how to dance. That is the proper form of club dancing, anything else makes you look like an uncoordinated tool. There are numerous dance styles, look them up on youtube.

Tektonic, Melbourne Shuffle, Popping, Liquid, Break Dance, Jump Style, Contact Juggling, Glowsticking, Tutting. Pick up a few moves from each, combo them and you'll look better than 99% of people.

Drinking at a nightclub is for fags who can't dance. If you 'just dance' you'll likely end up looking like Elaine from Seinfeld... even if you don't care, it looks awful. Watch a few episodes of 'so you think you can dance' and watch the truly terrible ones try to dance.... thats what people who 'just do anything' look like. Only takes a few hours to properly learn a couple moves especially under a skilled professional and will help you through the rest of your life. I learned to dance really well in my 20's and its made my dating life soooo much easier. Dancing is free, everyone wants to know the guy who can dance and your social value sky rockets in a club. I always bring my own girls and mates but people will come out of nowhere to offer me drinks and seats at their table. The last few clubs I've been to the manager came over and stuck me on stage. Every so often I get the opportunity to teach 50 or so Chinese kids how to dance for an hour, they love it. I teach adults popping every so often to... it makes me about $200 to $300 bucks a month. Learning to dance well is really important if you are going to go clubbing on a saturday night and want to HAVE FUN.

BAD DANCING

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNzk4NjM0MDQ=.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XODIxMzM0OTY=.html

----------------------------------------------------------


http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjk4MDcyNTYw.html

Big difference between the props THIS guy gets and 'just doing anything'. You can attract and hold a crowd with just 1/10th of his stuff. Clubbing is about being seen and the number one way to be get the attention is being able to be a good dancer. If you just want to chat up women goto a bar.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjU0NTIzOTk2.html

Pae and Sarah have an instructional video you can order, there stuff is great for nightclubs where they play electronic.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTYxOTM1Nzgw.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzkxNDU5NTI4.html

Also liquid dance is built for nightclubs. A bit of instructional by some guy: http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTYxOTM1NTk2.html
I started with Liquid, then learned popping and gliding and everything else I could get my hands on.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNjc1MjM0MTY=.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzMwMDQ4MTYw.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNDU1NTA3MDk2.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzkyNDYyOTk2.html

Some of this electro is cool but hard to learn there are better vids on youtube especially from Mexico... Mexicans use a harder form and it looks fantastic.

Heres the newest stuff I've seen... wish I was young enough to get into this. http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzQwMTkwMDg0.html

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTcwOTY4NjU2.html (My brother and his gf are into this [they live in Germany])
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNDU2OTI3NjMy.html ( CHINA )

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNDcyMTAyNzQ0.html (Super Junior - Korea [KPOP] If you can do a bit of this, Chinese girls will cream their pants for you)

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNDk5ODIwOTEy.html (T-ARA has made the melbourne shuffle super popular here in China for women)
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjkyNjkyMA==.html Axwell - Feel the Vibe (My fav)

Dancing like Game becomes so much fun you'll want to do it in your spare time.. when you can do it well, its the most nerve wracking thing ever. Learn to dance.
problem is you have to find a club with somewhat good music...none of that BS techno garbage.....i freakin hate techno music in clubs
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XOTY1MjU2NjQ=.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjkxNTAwODQ4.html
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzA2MDkwNzI=.html

Go to a bar if you don't want to dance.
 
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TillTheEndOfTime

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dap said:
Just an observation:the advice on this thread seems to be the exception to a few "rules" of pick up that I always see mentioned. Usually, people in the manosphere say to NOT drink a lot. And the "just dance and go crazy and not care what others think" advice sounds an awful lot like the "just be yourself" BS. I'm not disagreeing, just noticing that these rules don't seem to apply as much here.

The idea is not to "just be yourself". The idea is to have fun and to not have your enjoyment contingent on whether you hook up or not.
 
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