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Caught My GIRLFRIEND talking smack .. Next Step ?

aznxboi

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Hey Fella,

I been dating this girl for 9 months now. Last few months has been rough, I been extremely broke, going to school without a job. She had a job. Whenever we go eat or the movies. She would pay for me. I would say 8/10 times.

Yesterday, she was catching up with a friend. I called her, and we were talking for like 2 min. I said bye, and she said bye on the phone. But I didnt hang up yet, since I wanted to ask her one more thing. But she thought she hang out up the phone. Then she continue talking to her friend. She said she had to pay for me everytime we go out, and how we both have different thinking. and its hard to communicate with me

While. Back then she would tell me in person. She got me and tell me not to worry. WOW. okay, how should I handle this? Should i confront her or pretend it never happened and let it go. Now Im working I have good income coming in.
 

goldengoose

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she got tired of paying your way and seems like she is getting tired of you. better step it up or she is gonna leave you for a guy who doesn't mooch free meals off her.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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I'm only going off of what you said, but that doesn't really sound like "talking smack." It sounds more like venting out of frustration.

If she was talking smack, if might have sounded like this, "I am dating a deadbeat. He can't even pay for his own movie ticket. He sucks."

That's what I consider talking ****. Sounds like she was just describing the situation to her friend, which is definitely something I'd do if I was in her position.
 

aznxboi

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Your right. My question is.. Should I talk to her about this? Because she never really talk to me about how she felt about this.. Or should I just let me action do the talking.
 

Tiguere

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just let it go .. dont mention it. invite her out and pay her way.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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Maybe you could use it as legitimate insight into the weaknesses in the relationship. If you guys don't communicate well, then maybe you should start working on that.

Even if things fall apart with this one, you'll be glad that you improved your relationship skills when the time comes for a new one.

I agree with Tiguere that you should not bring it up. I also agree with him that you really should pay for everything unless she puts up a fuss about it. She floated you for a while, so you should really show her that you're a responsible adult who is capable of reciprocating the kindness.
 

ArcBound

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Lol she complains about it to her friends

But in front of you she's willing to put on a nice face and pay regardless.

Actions>words. So what if she complains once in a while, she still is paying 80% for you and that's an action that speaks very loudly.
 

Ace_Magnamus

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You forgot the "S". It's hey fellas. not fella. there is more than one of us. She should talk some smack. She is getting disgusted using her money to pay your way all the time. Just a warning.... She will find another guy very soon if you don't shape up.


Deadly_Ripped said:
Maybe you could use it as legitimate insight into the weaknesses in the relationship. If you guys don't communicate well, then maybe you should start working on that.

Even if things fall apart with this one, you'll be glad that you improved your relationship skills when the time comes for a new one.

I agree with Tiguere that you should not bring it up. I also agree with him that you really should pay for everything unless she puts up a fuss about it. She floated you for a while, so you should really show her that you're a responsible adult who is capable of reciprocating the kindness.
She's been paying his way the whole time. Don't think she would fuss when he finally pays for once. Bringing it up will just start a fight. Let it go. Just pay for some of her stuff for a change. Then she won't think you're using her.


aznxboi said:
Your right. My question is.. Should I talk to her about this? Because she never really talk to me about how she felt about this.. Or should I just let me action do the talking.
why do that? you already know she is annoyed that she pays your way. No need to talk it over. Your actions have been looking at her when the waitress takes the tab that she paid for while you look on looking like an user. start paying her way or she will look for the nearest exit from your relationship.
 

mahoney

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don't bring up that you overheard

having said that, at any point have you acknowledged the fact that she has been doing this for you, or apologized for this period when you weren't able to pay? have you made it up to her in any way?

because it doesn't sound like it from what she was saying, it doesn't sound like she feels particularly appreciated at all

need to put this right soon, you're in the danger zone right now
 

Myrrdin

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Whaat?

You don't care what she thinks. She hasn't b1tched. Great. You simply overheard a conversation. Big deal. Do what you've been doing so far. It's been working right?! Why change it. Let her pay. Let her invest. A$$hole game to the max.

Don't change the way you act!!! She will smell the weakness.
 

dementia

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its ******* game but not nescesary - its not like paying for meals n **** is going to DLV you geez..If anything you are also flicking off the 'provider of loved ones' attraction switch in her head. I dont think youre in the red zone right now but you might be later because of this. If you are making money just take her out once make it a cool date. Pay it all, just to show u can. You dont need to be an ******* all the time. *******s dont have **** on real players who know what they are doing and WHY **** works. Now you got $$ still go dutch with her and leave it at that. She has invested already, and investment is not only about money, its more about time and sex, have her do you favours **** like that... Pay your way dude,.. meals??... that **** should be handled, atleast paying for ya own.
 

Julius_Seizeher

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Dump her and get your life out of the gutter, whatever it takes.

It's only a matter of time before she dumps you for the same reasons you should dump her: you need to get your act together. We've all seen this movie before.
 

crazyboy

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Don't dump her because she not actually talking smack about you. She bringing up that you don't pay for anything and that she feels used. All you have to do is start paying for some stuff and everything would go back to normal. She is your girlfriend not some girl your dating, so paying for a date shouldn't be that much hassle. if you dont have a job get one. You don't want her to start wearing pants in realtionship just because you don't want to pay.
 
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