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Catching feelings w/ a F buddy

dudewut

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Long story short, I am talking to a girl who is not a good idea besides being a FWB or F*ckbuddy or someone you can get nudes from or hit up when you are bored.

Problem is I am starting to give a f*ck about her, where my brain is starting to tell me that she is probably cheating on me or lying to me (mind you, we are not in a relationship... this is the beta coming out) my brain is constantly nitpicking little details and inconsistencies.This is not a good mindset and all its doing is cramping my game and preventing me from having fun and sex.

Now I dont know if its insecurity or if I will attract what I fear etc. OR maybe its my instincts telling me something is wrong (I dont like being lied to) however, I want these feelings of attachment, jealousy, etc. to stop. It makes no sense, she is not my girlfriend yet my sub-conscious makes it seem like she is.

How do I make it stop? How do I get better at compartmentalizing?
 

TheGambino

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Spin plates! Youll get excited about new women and she Will fade away and seem so boring!
 

btownbuck2012

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The ONLY reason to continue sleeping with a woman w/ red flags is if you're able to not catch any feelings. The moment that happens you need to drop her. You know what to do.
 

dudewut

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Spin plates! Youll get excited about new women and she Will fade away and seem so boring!
The ONLY reason to continue sleeping with a woman w/ red flags is if you're able to not catch any feelings. The moment that happens you need to drop her. You know what to do.
Gents, here is the thing. She is the only prospect I have as of late. I am not in a place that is good for hitting women up. I did what I can and I tried, but the rejection seemed deeper and it seems to be exacerbating my "oneitis" with the slutty girl. I wish I was a psychopath that can feel nothing. What do you think is at play here? Should I hand in my man card? I do feel like a little ***** rn.
 

btownbuck2012

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Gents, here is the thing. She is the only prospect I have as of late. I am not in a place that is good for hitting women up. I did what I can and I tried, but the rejection seemed deeper and it seems to be exacerbating my "oneitis" with the slutty girl. I wish I was a psychopath that can feel nothing. What do you think is at play here? Should I hand in my man card? I do feel like a little ***** rn.
If sex with a woman who is obviously trouble is so important to you that you cannot drop her despite the negative side effects that are sure to come w/ keeping contact with her, then you've got some serious work to do on your inner game. I'm not saying that to diss you, most men in your spot wouldn't be able to drop this girl.
 

TheGambino

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Gents, here is the thing. She is the only prospect I have as of late. I am not in a place that is good for hitting women up. I did what I can and I tried, but the rejection seemed deeper and it seems to be exacerbating my "oneitis" with the slutty girl. I wish I was a psychopath that can feel nothing. What do you think is at play here? Should I hand in my man card? I do feel like a little ***** rn.
That’s the problem indeed. Because You lack options You are catching feelings... go to the gym, focus on Work, get a haircut, basically focus on yourself and keep approaching and having fun to get a good rotation. The only way too get reach abundance is too spin plates.
 

CMNILS87

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You say she’s not worth hanging out with more and she has red flags, but you haven’t listed any?

You’re worrying about her cheating, but you’re not exclusive and you think all this bad stuff immediately. Maybe she’s see someone else, maybe not and is banking on dating you even though she has whorish tendencies.

You need to break it off if you’re this worked up about a plate and go back to monk mode. No plate should get inside your head this bad
 

wifehunter

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dudewut

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Maybe she’s see someone else, maybe not and is banking on dating you even though she has whorish tendencies.
Well maybe she is, maybe she is not. The point is I shouldnt be this worked up. Sure I could spin other plates, then when one person comes along she becomes idealized in my head and I would be on square one... The cycle repeats itself. WTF.

I appreciate everyone's response ITT btw, I am not antagonizing anyone. I am just trying to discuss.
 

CMNILS87

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Let’s see a pic of this chick and I want to hear the red flags
 

dudewut

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I have friends BTW who emphatically suggested that I continue f*cking her whether or not she is seeing someone else. "why turn down free p*ssy? at least you have a back up than starting at 0. And if you confirm she is lying you now you can use that as leverage. Now you know what kind of girl she is and act and adjust accordingly." I like this course of action, I am just having trouble being the cold, steely-eyed alpha that has absolute state control. E.g. I am sooo close to calling her out on her BS, which would surely just turn her off and make her labia curl inwards.

I dont want it to happen. I am wondering if any DJs find themselves in a situation where they needed to summon a lot of testicular fortitude and stay un-phased, at the cusp of wuv.
 

dudewut

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Let’s see a pic of this chick and I want to hear the red flags
Its just inconsistencies with her stories/schedule (she works irregular hours) and lack of evidence of said "employment" or "jobs" (heh), why she didnt hit me up or whatever. Whether or not she is fVcking someone else. Quite honestly, I know its a lot to expect for a woman to have honesty, but I would rather know than not know if she is being plowed by someone else, I dont like being a made a fool of mainly.

Maybe I dont have oneitis its just now I am unhealthily obsessed with her and it creates a feedback loop.

EDIT
Case in point. This morning she snapped me some booty pics. Now we are best friends on Snapchat where there is a "❤" emoji beside our names. Then when she sent me those booty pics it turned to "" which means that I am not the top person she is sending snaps to. Which implies she might be sending nudes to someone else and selling it off that it's for me! This might also be the reason why she keeps on sending me snaps throughout the day in order to keep me in the dark.

I know, I know this is female/sociopathic level of analysis. But do you know what I mean? I really want to bring it up to her...
 
Last edited:

TheGambino

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Its just inconsistencies with her stories/schedule (she works irregular hours) and lack of evidence of said "employment" or "jobs" (heh), why she didnt hit me up or whatever. Whether or not she is fVcking someone else. Quite honestly, I know its a lot to expect for a woman to have honesty, but I would rather know than not know if she is being plowed by someone else, I dont like being a made a fool of mainly.

Maybe I dont have oneitis its just now I am unhealthily obsessed with her and it creates a feedback loop.

EDIT
Case in point. This morning she snapped me some booty pics. Now we are best friends on Snapchat where there is a "❤" emoji beside our names. Then when she sent me those booty pics it turned to "" which means that I am not the top person she is sending snaps to. Which implies she might be sending nudes to someone else and selling it off that it's for me! This might also be the reason why she keeps on sending me snaps throughout the day in order to keep me in the dark.

I know, I know this is female/sociopathic level of analysis. But do you know what I mean? I really want to bring it up to her...
Keep having fun and hooking up All You got to do is set up dates let her do the ltr talk. Believe me.
 

CMNILS87

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Its just inconsistencies with her stories/schedule (she works irregular hours) and lack of evidence of said "employment" or "jobs" (heh), why she didnt hit me up or whatever. Whether or not she is fVcking someone else. Quite honestly, I know its a lot to expect for a woman to have honesty, but I would rather know than not know if she is being plowed by someone else, I dont like being a made a fool of mainly.

Maybe I dont have oneitis its just now I am unhealthily obsessed with her and it creates a feedback loop.

EDIT
Case in point. This morning she snapped me some booty pics. Now we are best friends on Snapchat where there is a "❤" emoji beside our names. Then when she sent me those booty pics it turned to "" which means that I am not the top person she is sending snaps to. Which implies she might be sending nudes to someone else and selling it off that it's for me! This might also be the reason why she keeps on sending me snaps throughout the day in order to keep me in the dark.

I know, I know this is female/sociopathic level of analysis. But do you know what I mean? I really want to bring it up to her...
For all you know she Couldve been snappping her best chick friends 24/7. You always default to another guy
 

dudewut

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For all you know she Couldve been snappping her best chick friends 24/7. You always default to another guy
But then we were each other's top Snapper this entire time! So it made no sense that suddenly I got knocked out to 2nd place when she sent the nudes.

Also, yeah after being cheated on and taking the red pill I kind of think all women are *****s out to get me (logically, that makes no sense) I don't know if it's better to think this way.
 

PeasantPlayer

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Enjoy the time you spend with her keep it simple, go out and live your life however it may be and let the dust settle where it may. Remember you still have choices
 

Macaframalama

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Its just inconsistencies with her stories/schedule (she works irregular hours) and lack of evidence of said "employment" or "jobs" (heh), why she didnt hit me up or whatever. Whether or not she is fVcking someone else. Quite honestly, I know its a lot to expect for a woman to have honesty, but I would rather know than not know if she is being plowed by someone else, I dont like being a made a fool of mainly.

Maybe I dont have oneitis its just now I am unhealthily obsessed with her and it creates a feedback loop.

EDIT
Case in point. This morning she snapped me some booty pics. Now we are best friends on Snapchat where there is a "❤" emoji beside our names. Then when she sent me those booty pics it turned to "" which means that I am not the top person she is sending snaps to. Which implies she might be sending nudes to someone else and selling it off that it's for me! This might also be the reason why she keeps on sending me snaps throughout the day in order to keep me in the dark.

I know, I know this is female/sociopathic level of analysis. But do you know what I mean? I really want to bring it up to her...
Dude, you have to stop with the delusions. At this point, what she does, where she is and who she bangs is none of your business, as it isn't any of hers. Best case scenario, she calls you out for the control freak that you are portraying and tells you to kick rocks. Worst case scenario, you force it into a committed relationship with a woman that you know is no good for you. You are in the perfect position right now. Realize it. You get smash her and have free rein to smash a multitude of other chics simultaneously. One, none or many. It's a no-brainer.
 

dudewut

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Dude, you have to stop with the delusions. At this point, what she does, where she is and who she bangs is none of your business, as it isn't any of hers. Best case scenario, she calls you out for the control freak that you are portraying and tells you to kick rocks. Worst case scenario, you force it into a committed relationship with a woman that you know is no good for you. You are in the perfect position right now. Realize it. You get smash her and have free rein to smash a multitude of other chics simultaneously. One, none or many. It's a no-brainer.
That's kind of my problem, I can't keep it cool.
 

Macaframalama

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That's kind of my problem, I can't keep it cool.
Think about how you will feel if you blow it out and she stops letting you hit, but still letting other guys hit, if she in fact is. Guaranteed, she will be if you confront her like you are suggesting. Jealousy is a natural emotion. Saying, I don't want her, but I don't want anyone else to have her is veering towards the unhealthy side. Your only real options are finding options or letting her go if you are unable to adapt. Has she sensed your jealousy at all?
 
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