Busy Bea\/ers

[Desdinova]

I recently started spinning another plate. This girl is involved in curling, aqua aerobics, and god knows what else. She appears to have a very busy schedule. My experience in the past with busy bea\/ers has been pretty lousy. My ex-wife was one, and I dated one last year. Both of them were too busy to spend any significant amount of time with me.

My main plate doesn't have much of a social life, few hobbies, and a handful of friends. I always find women like this much more compatible and less frustrating to date.

Anyone else experience this?

(side note: WTF is with the forum censoring the word bea\/er?)

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Des,
seems ideal to me...just the way I have it,a social introvert as Principal love interest,always there for you...then a number of busy Dam Builders as side dishes who are so busy that they are happy to fit their Svexual needs into one Day a week...all rather symbiotic and works well!

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

I had an LTR like this. In the beginning, it seemed like every night she had one obligation or another planned, then church on Sundays. But once we started getting serious she started skipping or flat out quitting these extra activities, even church. Even though I'd tell her to go, "Ill see you afterwards or tomorrow", she still wouldn't go, she'd want to just be with me. Then she'd say: "I hate how I am with you", of course, some how putting the blame on me. Those extra curricular activities filled a void I believe that, as an LTR, I replaced.

She was a little nutso, and liked to take things to the extreme, so it was hard for her to find a balance. It seemed like she was always fighting herself over something...but when it wasn't her, it was me haha. Needless to say the relationship was a little bit of a rocky one.

 

[samspade]

Moderation, and something that matches your pace. Busy beevers are too much for me. On the other hand I notice a lot of women, especially younger, whose main hobby is sitting around watching Netflix and various DVR'd TV shows. One girl I know said half-joking, "If I could sit around on my couch all day and watch TV, I would." Those are just the extreme ends of the spectrum though.

 

[Atom Smasher]

In my experience busy beevers are hard to nail down because they have too many outside options. I like my girls devoted to me.

 

[pdx1138]

YA I definitely prefer the non "busy all the time" type.

It's nice to have things to do, but I need down time as well for balance in life.

 

[Married Buried]

I have dated some of the "perpetual motion" girls and I have come to the conclusion that there is something fundamentally wrong with them. They somehow feel compelled to always be doing something and it is just a quality that I do not like in a woman.

I prefer the quiet girls with a few close friends and not endless social butterfly obligations.

And then whenever they say they are too "busy" to hang out, alot of the times they are using that as an excuse to meet with other men. I do not trust these types whatsoever.

 

[Married Buried]

I would thoroughly enjoy a woman that was too busy to try to consume all my time. Unfortunately, the women I know that are like this are usually type-A high strung women that I don't find too attractive.



I think I would just find it totally bizarre to be cheated on by a woman like this, it would feel more like losing a business client lol.

You'll never know if she is cheating, that is the problem.

 

[Married Buried]

Thats the biggest problem with cheating in general and something the new crop of "be super confident/alpha and if she cheats walk away" guys never seem to grasp.

These busy women condition you to accept them always being busy, so they use the busy excuse whenever it's convenient. Like single mothers using their kids as an excuse every time they want to flake on you but are really doing other things.

 

[Colossus]

I have dated some of the "perpetual motion" girls and I have come to the conclusion that there is something fundamentally wrong with them. They somehow feel compelled to always be doing something and it is just a quality that I do not like in a woman.

I prefer the quiet girls with a few close friends and not endless social butterfly obligations.

Agreed. One girl I dated last year was like this. Endlessly full social calendar. I find it annoying. You get dragged into a bunch of gatherings and fundraisers and lunches and drinks with HER crowd, and if you show any disdain she gets offended.

Not that I like a couch sloth, but somewhere in the middle.

 

[pdx1138]

Agreed. One girl I dated last year was like this. Endlessly full social calendar. I find it annoying. You get dragged into a bunch of gatherings and fundraisers and lunches and drinks with HER crowd, and if you show any disdain she gets offended.

Not that I like a couch sloth, but somewhere in the middle.

Exactly bro.

 

[Jitterbug]

I know this type. I'm under the impression that they keep themselves so ridiculously busy with bullsh1t so they don't have any free time for self reflection. Which would be horrifying, because they're empty and useless people.

 

[dasein]

I hate these. If I ever met one that was growing or learning something from all the bluster might change my tune, but IME they are some of the most superficial. Same as the ones who are constantly travelling here and there and you ask them to share their experience... "the people were nice and the food was good." bleh. Most of them are self-medicating something grisly with their frenetics, I don't trust them and don't want to f them any more either. They are almost never good in bed.

 

[VladPatton]

I believe overly busy people without a minute to spare are running from something in their lives, or fear facing it if they stand still. That's a red flag for me. Enjoy your 25/8 life, that'll be a Next from me. If I want craziness full time I'll just give the people I work with my private cell phone.

 

[KarmaSutra]

This girl is involved in curling

Is she one of the chicks running down the lane with the dry-mop, or is she pin-pointing her gaze on the rock?

Either way, she's good for anal.

 

[speed dawg]

I know this type. I'm under the impression that they keep themselves so ridiculously busy with bullsh1t so they don't have any free time for self reflection. Which would be horrifying, because they're empty and useless people.

This.

Most of the busy ones I've ever seen are busy with just completely useless sh*t. The one that chewed me up and spit me out (and ultimately brought me here) was like this. She was interesting because she was 'busy' in a new town where I had no friends, so I always went along with her, mainly because I knew I'd be getting my d*ck wet that night. But the stuff we would do was horrible. Just making appearances here and there, watching her friend sing, meeting her deranged ex-roommate at a bar to listen to her problems, etc. Stupidity. Absolutely ZERO Quadrant II activities.

I steer clear nowadays of women and men alike. They are most likely the ones that are chronic facebook/myspace/twitter abusers. Their self-esteem comes from what others think and how they are 'seen' in their little worlds. You said it best, they have all the paper title in the world but nothing underneath. No core foundation.

 

[abe0]

Most of the women I have dated are the busy beavs....sometimes leaves you wondering if they really are interested in you or they are doing other men. Never date a woman who into horses......big mistake as they take up a lot of time.
Now I am dating someone with more time and is readily available...leaving little doubt who she wants to be with. As long as she does not become needy.....I prefer a woman who makes the time for me rather than the those who find it difficult fitting you into their schedule.
IMHO...Abe

 

[Victory Unlimited]

I've had a woman who worked a double-shift, but packed a late-night snack to eat while she fought sleep during her hour and a half drive it to my city---just to come and spend 3 or 4 hours of time with me.

BUT---I've also had a woman who didn't have to work all ,was financially independent, and only lived 7 minutes away from me---BUT who could NEVER find any time to spend with me.

The only difference between those two women was that one was INTO me and the other was not.

The Hardcore Truth:

In most cases, how "BUSY" a woman is---is in DIRECT PROPORTION to how much value she places on the idea of attracting, engaging, and/or KEEPING you as a part of her life.


V.U.

 

[Jitterbug]

I'd disagree, VU, as I think we're talking about a different type of women.

The Busy B3aver could be someone who's very into me and dating me, but always has to fill her life (and mine) with lots of bullsh1t activities. She cannot stand having a weekend unplanned, we always have to meet up with people or go places or invite people over. She cannot have a night spent just chilling and doing nothing.

Also, many women do not know how to actively engage and keep a man, beyond initial attraction. They think "being themselves" is enough. That's why those busy types would drag a bloke through their full schedule bullsh1t and get shocked when he runs for his life after a short while.

 

[SecondHalf]

I recently started spinning another plate. This girl is involved in curling, aqua aerobics, and god knows what else. She appears to have a very busy schedule. My experience in the past with busy bea\/ers has been pretty lousy. My ex-wife was one, and I dated one last year. Both of them were too busy to spend any significant amount of time with me.

My main plate doesn't have much of a social life, few hobbies, and a handful of friends. I always find women like this much more compatible and less frustrating to date.

Anyone else experience this?

(side note: WTF is with the forum censoring the word bea\/er?)

I'm agreeing with Scar on this one. She's just a plate right? She could be the spicy dish you love to eat when you crave it, but don't eat it too often.

Just don't put to much energy/resources in her. Attention should be in direct proportion with how much time they spend on you.

SH