ELMER_GANTRY
Don Juan
BPD girls are extremely hateful and selfish. The only reason that she will re-contact you is because of herself, not because of you. BPD girls only re-contact ex boyfriends or old f*** buddies when they want or need something from them. It's never about you, its always about her, just like it was during your relationship that she wanted everything from you, because she wanted it for herself. I bet she is not getting enough comfort or sympathy from the current boyfriend or f*** buddy, so she has turned to you, maybe even some other boyfriends too, so she can get what she needs. You are not her boyfriend anymore, so there is no need to talk to her, your words of "sorry" won't help her at all, because she can never be happy, she will always be in pain, she will always hate herself, so your words can't do anything, except to make you vulnerable to her, and ruin all the good progress you made trying to forget her. Let her boyfriend or f*** buddy comfort her that is their job, after all, she thought they were so great in the first place, and didn't want you, so let her get what she needs from them, that is not your obligation. Think about it, if something didn't happen to her current relationship, she never would even contact you at all. She would of never even given you a thought, and you never would have heard from her. Again, she is only contacting you because of what she wanted and needed at that time. It wasn't about you, it was about her. If the roles were reversed and you needed something from her, you can bet she would either ignore you or answer the phone in a cold tone. It is only about her, it was that way during your relationship, and it will always be that way after, only when she decides she wants or needs something from you, is when you will hear from her.
BPD girls hold and treat people like objects or possessions. They hold them close like an object they need, then when they lose them, they panic and need them back again. When she loses something in her life, that was a possession to her, an object, and now she lost that, so she feels a loss of that object. She associates you with her loss, because it reminds her of you. She feels the loss of you out of her life, so that is why she will contact you, to get back that other lost feeling she has
BPD girls fear abandonment, that is why they act the way they do. She feels abandonment on both ends, and now is trying to get in touch with you to get rid of her pain, it is all about her, nothing about you, so don't fall for it.
They also treat their boyfriends and f*** buddies as objects and possessions as well. They need them there with them for a short amount of time, then after they served their purpose, they get rid of them, or don't use them, until they need them again. This is the perfect way to look at it. When a girl sees a new outfit, purse, or a phone, they need to have it. Right? They will do anything to make sure they have it. So when they get it they are thrilled with it, they use it a lot, then after it serves it's purpose, or gets old for them, they discard it, or put it away for a new one. Just like they do with their men. They are so into them at first, then will get rid of them at a moments notice for a new guy, who she thinks is better than you, after she was telling you for all those months how great you are, and nobody was ever as amazing as you. Just all lies to get you trapped in a relationship with her. She will be telling the new guy the same exact thing as she told you.
I also like to use the Christmas decorations analogy, because it is the PERFECT example of how BPD girls are, they treat guys like Christmas decorations. After Thanksgiving, you take all the Christmas decorations down, and you set them all up in and outside of your house. Then after they served their purpose, after New Year's Day is over, you take them down, and put them away, until you need them again next year. This how they treat the ex boyfriends. They used the boyfriends for the short amount of time they needed them, then they got rid of the guys, they became the ex boyfriends, then they put the ex's away until the next time she needs them again, just like decorations. BPD girls won't contact the ex's until they need them again for something, when they need them for some particular use they need them for. Ex boyfriends always serve some purpose for BPD girls for when they need them, remember it is not about you, it is about her, as it always will be.
Another reason why you shouldn't re-contact her is because she is liable to be mean or hurt you again, these girls are crazy, and are always out to get revenge on ex boyfriends. She is probably mad you ignored her for all those months, so she will wait to turn the knife into you one more time. After you served your purpose for her again, she will turn on you in a blink of an eye, she will act like you don't exist, just like before, and she won't need you again, until the next time that something comes up, that she wants you for to serve another purpose. It is a never ending cycle, but you can end it by ignoring her. These girls are crazy, they can be so sweet and nice one minute, and the next minute they are complete monsters. They can be this way with the same guy, or be nice to one guy, then be a monster to the boyfriend just a few minutes later. They are actors that can fool anybody and conform to any situation. You can be fooled by their mask, but when you see them for what they really are, they are bad actors, and the mask falls right off their face. I was gaming this one BPD girl, she was so awesome and amazing to me, and a few minutes later with her boyfriend, she was this horrible monster that terrorized the guy. The same girl with two different personalities acting her role, with two different guys, in just a matter of minutes, a total Jekyll and Hyde routine, that she can use on the same person, or different people at any time. That is how they operate so watch out for women like this.
I just co-authored a book on BPD women that will be out very soon. There is a lot of valuable information in there for people to learn and understand who went through this awful experience. Maybe you just want to learn about these types of women, so you can avoid them if you ever encounter one. The main focus of the second portion is about getting better. Getting over the traumatic events that you went through in that relationship. What you can do to restore normality back to your life and how to get over the shock and pain. You will learn the 5 technique steps of getting over your BPD. How not allowing her to still control you, will make you a better man and get you thinking with a clear mind. It isn't healthy to re-live that experience, and there is a chapter that is dedicated to how you can move on from your BPD, so you can focus on new women without that fear.of "her" ruining your next relationship.
Hopefully, this helps you out a little, but don't answer her texts or start anymore communication with her. This is all about you, trying to get over a horrible experience that she put you through. You need to keep getting better and remove her from your mind and your life. It was her actions that made it what it was. Don't revisit any of that again by starting communication, or all the good progress you made will go right back to where you started last year.
Guys make the critical mistake of texting back, and it ruins them because they find out what I've been talking about. The only reason she contacted you was for her, not because of you. Then she will hurt you again, just like all the times before, and these guys will have more pain to get over. She is used to pain, you can't help her, she doesn't want help, so your words won't do anything to help her You probably tried to help her during your relationship, and you can see how far that got you.
Be smart, stay in control, ignore the text, stay no contact, and move forward and better your life without her in it. Otherwise, you will never get away from her if you text back, she will always come back, and you don't want her or that pain in your life.
BPD girls hold and treat people like objects or possessions. They hold them close like an object they need, then when they lose them, they panic and need them back again. When she loses something in her life, that was a possession to her, an object, and now she lost that, so she feels a loss of that object. She associates you with her loss, because it reminds her of you. She feels the loss of you out of her life, so that is why she will contact you, to get back that other lost feeling she has
BPD girls fear abandonment, that is why they act the way they do. She feels abandonment on both ends, and now is trying to get in touch with you to get rid of her pain, it is all about her, nothing about you, so don't fall for it.
They also treat their boyfriends and f*** buddies as objects and possessions as well. They need them there with them for a short amount of time, then after they served their purpose, they get rid of them, or don't use them, until they need them again. This is the perfect way to look at it. When a girl sees a new outfit, purse, or a phone, they need to have it. Right? They will do anything to make sure they have it. So when they get it they are thrilled with it, they use it a lot, then after it serves it's purpose, or gets old for them, they discard it, or put it away for a new one. Just like they do with their men. They are so into them at first, then will get rid of them at a moments notice for a new guy, who she thinks is better than you, after she was telling you for all those months how great you are, and nobody was ever as amazing as you. Just all lies to get you trapped in a relationship with her. She will be telling the new guy the same exact thing as she told you.
I also like to use the Christmas decorations analogy, because it is the PERFECT example of how BPD girls are, they treat guys like Christmas decorations. After Thanksgiving, you take all the Christmas decorations down, and you set them all up in and outside of your house. Then after they served their purpose, after New Year's Day is over, you take them down, and put them away, until you need them again next year. This how they treat the ex boyfriends. They used the boyfriends for the short amount of time they needed them, then they got rid of the guys, they became the ex boyfriends, then they put the ex's away until the next time she needs them again, just like decorations. BPD girls won't contact the ex's until they need them again for something, when they need them for some particular use they need them for. Ex boyfriends always serve some purpose for BPD girls for when they need them, remember it is not about you, it is about her, as it always will be.
Another reason why you shouldn't re-contact her is because she is liable to be mean or hurt you again, these girls are crazy, and are always out to get revenge on ex boyfriends. She is probably mad you ignored her for all those months, so she will wait to turn the knife into you one more time. After you served your purpose for her again, she will turn on you in a blink of an eye, she will act like you don't exist, just like before, and she won't need you again, until the next time that something comes up, that she wants you for to serve another purpose. It is a never ending cycle, but you can end it by ignoring her. These girls are crazy, they can be so sweet and nice one minute, and the next minute they are complete monsters. They can be this way with the same guy, or be nice to one guy, then be a monster to the boyfriend just a few minutes later. They are actors that can fool anybody and conform to any situation. You can be fooled by their mask, but when you see them for what they really are, they are bad actors, and the mask falls right off their face. I was gaming this one BPD girl, she was so awesome and amazing to me, and a few minutes later with her boyfriend, she was this horrible monster that terrorized the guy. The same girl with two different personalities acting her role, with two different guys, in just a matter of minutes, a total Jekyll and Hyde routine, that she can use on the same person, or different people at any time. That is how they operate so watch out for women like this.
I just co-authored a book on BPD women that will be out very soon. There is a lot of valuable information in there for people to learn and understand who went through this awful experience. Maybe you just want to learn about these types of women, so you can avoid them if you ever encounter one. The main focus of the second portion is about getting better. Getting over the traumatic events that you went through in that relationship. What you can do to restore normality back to your life and how to get over the shock and pain. You will learn the 5 technique steps of getting over your BPD. How not allowing her to still control you, will make you a better man and get you thinking with a clear mind. It isn't healthy to re-live that experience, and there is a chapter that is dedicated to how you can move on from your BPD, so you can focus on new women without that fear.of "her" ruining your next relationship.
Hopefully, this helps you out a little, but don't answer her texts or start anymore communication with her. This is all about you, trying to get over a horrible experience that she put you through. You need to keep getting better and remove her from your mind and your life. It was her actions that made it what it was. Don't revisit any of that again by starting communication, or all the good progress you made will go right back to where you started last year.
Guys make the critical mistake of texting back, and it ruins them because they find out what I've been talking about. The only reason she contacted you was for her, not because of you. Then she will hurt you again, just like all the times before, and these guys will have more pain to get over. She is used to pain, you can't help her, she doesn't want help, so your words won't do anything to help her You probably tried to help her during your relationship, and you can see how far that got you.
Be smart, stay in control, ignore the text, stay no contact, and move forward and better your life without her in it. Otherwise, you will never get away from her if you text back, she will always come back, and you don't want her or that pain in your life.
