Biterness Towards Women

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When did men start becoming afraid of being labelled "bitter" DA DA DAAA!!

I wouldn't put too much stock into a word given life by high IQ jwish feminists. Once upon a time it was a word used to describe the taste of eating lemon. Now it's a tool used to corral anyone who strays from cathedral groupthink. Look at who's actually using this word to see it's value to you as a man.

I've used it myself to be fair but only ever toward those still deeply invested in the hive mind. Leftards hate their words being thrown back at them. It's fun to watch the mangina lapdogs scramble to prove their non "bitterness".

 

[sodbuster]

I've been called bitter.... I just said "yes I AM", just so they would STFU and leave. It was only because I said something that didn't fit in her female world view....

 

[dasein]

I wouldn't put too much stock into a word given life by high IQ jwish feminists.

Bingo! Guys, "bitter" is a taste sensation, ever sit around and talk about "bitterness" with men other than ones who learned the word from women? Ever hear your dad or uncle use it? Ever talk about being "bitter" at the lake or out in the woods hunting/fishing? Ever say "I'm bitter because I didn't catch a trout today?" Of course the f not. It's been programmed into you/us, and as tits says it is very much politically charged towards an agenda. IME "bitter" as a feeling only comes to men via women. So...

1. OP, strip that gyno semantic frame BS off and out of your life right now, right this second, it's doing you no good at all. Don't buy into it. You may be -angry- (I suggest this one), you may be -disappointed-, you may be -dwelling- on negative emotions, you may be confused, irritated, annoyed, etc., but resolve to deep six the femme term "bitter" right now.

It's a two tiered semantic utility women use to blameshift to men. Notice how women aren't often framed as bitter, but rather "hurt," "abandoned," "used," "screwed over," "played." Ever wonder why this is? It's because they have reserved the "bitter" term mostly for men because it allows them to cast aspersions on his masculinity, devalue his feelings and imply that he is being a baby by not being able to let go. In short it's another version of the vomitous semantic nullity, "man up" with a very subtle "I don't give a rat about anything that takes the spotlight off me and my issues" chaser.

Be angry, sure you've made some mistakes, but that only goes so far, you've had a succession of pieces of sh-t in the female department and that may take time to move past. SO BE IT. Don't let anyone judge you for that, and most importantly don't judge yourself for it. It's good and right for men to get angry when f-ed over. We can't just go blow someone away or beat the hell out of them like in more civilized times. lol so anger it is.

2. Look for other gynoframing in your mind and attitude, you've been married enough and had enough experience with women that you are likely swimming in it without even realizing (they are great at brainwashing during relationships). Think of any and all instances of "conventional wisdom" about dealing with women and relationships, stuff well-meaning but ignorant people in your life told you. BS like "happy wife happy life," and every other gynoculture platitude. Root all that sh-t OUT right now. Drop it like a bucket of dirty diapers. Keep looking for that stuff and getting rid. You are the measure of your "conventional wisdom" going forward. Should start to feel good, if it doesn't yet, you aren't doing enough of it.

3. In that shovelling out the stables, you may find attitudes such as "a wife will make you happy," "a man needs a woman to be happy," "don't want to be a playboy, need to grow up one day and settle down." What you may be feeling as "bitterness" as others allude to, is that women are not one bit better than men generally. For every crappy trait men have like being violent, arrogant, blowhard bragging, women have an equally bad trait... and I mean at least equal. Lots of men feel they are "bitter" when in actuality they are just realizing women aren't any better than anyone else, and that can sting because it is so counter to our f-ed up culture and conditioning that every man alive today got a good snootful of.

If you can do these things or even start on them, you should start to feel better about your attitude. In all likelihood you are not "bitter" or unduly cynical, just realizing how things are after lots of experience. You probably appreciate what women are and the pleasures they can bring just fine, you just can't fall back on the old conditioning that they are some "answer" for a man to have a rich life. Sorry for the ramble, good luck.

 

[AttackFormation]

I found out she was talking to other guys on a secret email exchanging sexual pictures and to top it off talking sh!t about me. I could not believe it. She ended up fvcking another guy behind my back and began saying the most disgusting things to me. How much she loved other guys Fvcking her in the azz and how she was having ONS with other guys cvmming on her face.

Wow... for real?

 

[VikingKing]

I would trust a dog more than a woman.

 

[logicallefty]

As the OP, I wanted to say thanks again for all of the responses here. I have read everybody's reply here multiple times.

This is one of the many reasons I come to sosuave. I can't have an objective conversation about topics like this with too many people, even my good friends. Almost all of them are very blue pill. I find it so funny how subjects like this become voodoo so quick with most people. As for me, everyone always wants to put 100% of the blame on me for all that I have been through, and then they all say JUST MOVE ON. Easier said than done. If you put all of the crisises in all of my friend's lives combined, they don't in total equal what I have endured. I am working on moving on. I am really close to getting hired back on at another police department and being a cop again. I have been promised the job by the Chief and am just waiting on the next opening, whenever that is. When I get my badge back I think that will really help the healing for me. And I know while some of my past is my fault for not fully understanding women and allowing bad women in my life, I will not take the blame for everything that happened.

One other comment about my friends. I worry about most of them for being so blue pull. Most of them are married and are so AFC. Even the ones who have wives I like, which is about 1/2, I think they are in for a rude awakening when the AFC water completely puts out the flames.

Thanks again all.

 

[logicallefty]

I would trust a dog more than a woman.

lol my current GF accuses me of giving my dog more affection than I do her. I do.

 

[backbreaker]

At 30 almost 31, I've been homeless, I've been a drug addict. I've been treated like ****, I've been friendless, I'v been womanless. I've been laughed at, talked about, and what doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. Not just stronger, self reliant.

Just take it one day at a time man. One day at a time.


What really used to piss me off was not so much the hardships that I went through. What pissed me off more was questioning why me? What is it about me that has to put upw ith all this and yet others don't. Did I do something so bad where I deserved all of this? All i ever really wanted was a nice girl and a job I enjoyed. Was that so much to ask out of life? I had no plans for superior world domination or anything of that scale. Just wanted an attractive woman who gave a **** about me and a job I could wake up to and enjoy. If my razorbacks were good every once in a while that would be nice lol but not mandatory


Asking that question over and over again, while watching people who didn't have a f'n clue go through life and act like they were really doing something really pissed me off. I was VERY bitter at one point. VERY. Not even at women. At men who I felt had it easier. I was resentful at people particularly with better family setups than I had; I felt a lot of my hardships because I had stupid parents who thought they were helping me by "being tough" when they were really hurting me by not giving a **** when all I needed was someone who gave a ****. I hated kids whose parents handed them the world. I hated kids whose parents had money saved for college and I was living out of my car at 19. I hated the kid who was dating my oneitis for no other reason than HIS FATHER was successful


I'd be lying if I said I still didn't have somewhat of a chip on my shoulder. maybe that's why I work so hard. dammit i'm just as good as anyone else despite the disadvantages. But I'm past being bitter. My life is my life. And I've made the most of it. I have a lovely wife I'm crazy about. I have a kick ass son who is crazy about his daddy.


Use that bitterness as energy to do something. Channel it to d something more it takes energy to be bitter

 

[In2theGame]

Wow... for real?

Yes for real. It wasnt over the phone or text either. She told me this to my FACE. I jumped in a cab one night to her apartment building and told her to come down as i was outside and wanted to talk to her. She said she didnt care about me anymore and proceeded to tell me how guys from ONS came on her face and fvcked her. I stood standing there mixed with deep hurt but so much anger I almost snapped and wanted knock her out cold. All that coming from a girl who said she was deeply in love with me and wanted to get married just a short few weeks before. We were together for 5 years Then a few weeks after, She posted that she was engaged to another guy.

 

[AttackFormation]

Yes for real. It wasnt over the phone or text either. She told me this to my FACE. I jumped in a cab one night to her apartment building and told her to come down as i was outside and wanted to talk to her. She said she didnt care about me anymore and proceeded to tell me how guys from ONS came on her face and fvcked her. I stood standing there mixed with deep hurt but so much anger I almost snapped and wanted knock her out cold. All that coming from a girl who said she was deeply in love with me and wanted to get married just a short few weeks before. We were together for 5 years Then a few weeks after, She posted that she was engaged to another guy.

I'd probably have smashed her to the curb unless my mental restraints (you'll go to jail/lose your job/etc.) kept working, your mind was strong to not do it and recover from this.

Would you say:

1. there was something wrong with her and the minority of women like her
2. something you in hindsight know you f*cked up
or 3. is this just a risk you take when you get involved with any girl because female psychology is just messed the f*ck up?

I've had sex but never been in a relationship and haven't gossiped about any either, so I'm not sure what I should expect being young and inexperienced. I don't want to believe something like "there's a wh0re in every woman" because it sounds like when feminists say "every man is a potential rapist", but if it turns out to be true...

Being committed seems to do something to a woman's mind when I read posts here. It's like doing the most depraved things they can think of turns them on, whether it's blowing a guy in her husband's driveway and entering the door when it's done and pretending nothing happened or letting guys f*ck her in the ass and cvm on her face and sh!t when she's about to be married. It's as if the act of something they know is considered morally disgusting actually makes their pvssies wet, feeling like a dirty wh0re turns them on, like a criminal who gets a high out of breaking laws.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I don't want to believe something like "there's a wh0re in every woman"

There's at least the fantasy of being a wh0re in every woman. They won't admit it until they trust you a lot. It tends to come out in the bedroom, even if it is only pillow talk.

Another female fantasy that is very common that you're not allowed to talk about is a rape fantasy. Women will often have the fantasy of a tall dark stranger slipping into their house and forcing them into passionate sex. That doesn't mean that real life rape victims enjoy rape, but that fantasy still exists.

Show me the nicest, sweetest girl you can find, and I will bet that there is something twisted in her secret sex fantasies. And I like that about women - it's one of the things that keeps me from being bitter.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Yes for real. It wasnt over the phone or text either. She told me this to my FACE. I jumped in a cab one night to her apartment building and told her to come down as i was outside and wanted to talk to her. She said she didnt care about me anymore and proceeded to tell me how guys from ONS came on her face and fvcked her. I stood standing there mixed with deep hurt but so much anger I almost snapped and wanted knock her out cold. All that coming from a girl who said she was deeply in love with me and wanted to get married just a short few weeks before. We were together for 5 years Then a few weeks after, She posted that she was engaged to another guy.

Holy cow dude, how do you not see this coming?

If a woman is keeping anything private after 5 years together... RED EFFING FLAG

At least once a year you have to make sure ANY female is being honest with you.

Check that phone.
Surprise visit where she is supposed to be at.
Make sure her car is supposed to be where she says it is.
Check that FB account messages.

Standard procedure dude, I mean even if you don't do any of this stuff and still notice a high value for privacy in her life SPIN PLATES!!!

I will not honestly commit to a woman that has secrets on her phone.

Never ever no way no how.

In the end I honestly don't care who she bones, as long as I can bone other women i'm happy. And if what i'm looking for is a decent LTR i'll find one while i'm boning her on the side with her thinking were committed the whole time just like she did to you. Play the game dude, because it's playing you no matter what.

 

[AttackFormation]

I don't want to believe something like "there's a wh0re in every woman"

There's at least the fantasy of being a wh0re in every woman. They won't admit it until they trust you a lot. It tends to come out in the bedroom, even if it is only pillow talk.

Another female fantasy that is very common that you're not allowed to talk about is a rape fantasy. Women will often have the fantasy of a tall dark stranger slipping into their house and forcing them into passionate sex. That doesn't mean that real life rape victims enjoy rape, but that fantasy still exists.

Show me the nicest, sweetest girl you can find, and I will bet that there is something twisted in her secret sex fantasies. And I like that about women - it's one of the things that keeps me from being bitter.

You know what... right now I'm sitting here talking to a girl. It began with her saying how she was going to get drunk at the weekend and how if she passes out in a bush somewhere I'll have to come get her. I asked what she meant by that and she said, "take care of me ". I told her it sounded like she was trying to tell me about a fantasy she has and she said "haha maybe ".

I'm going to her place tomorrow. I guess.. wait okay, just received her last message. She basically confessed to having a rape fantasy.

What the f*ck do I do now lol. I guess I'm going to be the guy who cvms on her face and makes her feel like the dirty wh0re she fantasizes about being...

 

[In2theGame]

I'd probably have smashed her to the curb unless my mental restraints (you'll go to jail/lose your job/etc.) kept working, your mind was strong to not do it and recover from this.

Would you say:

1. there was something wrong with her and the minority of women like her
2. something you in hindsight know you f*cked up
or 3. is this just a risk you take when you get involved with any girl because female psychology is just messed the f*ck up?

I've had sex but never been in a relationship and haven't gossiped about any either, so I'm not sure what I should expect being young and inexperienced. I don't want to believe something like "there's a wh0re in every woman" because it sounds like when feminists say "every man is a potential rapist", but if it turns out to be true...

Being committed seems to do something to a woman's mind when I read posts here. It's like doing the most depraved things they can think of turns them on, whether it's blowing a guy in her husband's driveway and entering the door when it's done and pretending nothing happened or letting guys f*ck her in the ass and cvm on her face and sh!t when she's about to be married. It's as if the act of something they know is considered morally disgusting actually makes their pvssies wet, feeling like a dirty wh0re turns them on, like a criminal who gets a high out of breaking laws.

Your still a young dude and your bound to fall for a girl that's really into you. I don't like telling younger guys to think all girls are slvts and wh0res because that takes away from the guy ever experiencing truly loving someone & understanding what its like to care for a girl. On the other hand, The potential for getting massively hurt is there and i guess its a double edge sword. Women do the nastiest things sometimes and this is why i always encourage guys to be a rock when it comes to dealing with them in a relationship or not because they WILL try to run over you even when they are the weaker sex. I kind of feel bad for younger guys growing up now in terms of dealing with girls because the deception is getting worse and worse with feminism growing, Gay agenda being pushed, lowering Testosterone as whole so Men become more woman-like causing women to be less and less respectful of Men.

 

[logicallefty]

I kind of feel bad for younger guys growing up now in terms of dealing with girls because the deception is getting worse and worse with feminism growing, Gay agenda being pushed, lowering Testosterone as whole so Men become more woman-like causing women to be less and less respectful of Men.

IMO the whole "Operation De-Ball" movement as I call it saves women lots of work in the end.. The act of a man adhering to this and being femine lets the women know right off that he isn't fvck or relationship material. It saves HER the work of having to figure it out. Thus it reduces the number of men left. If she has 100 prospective men wanting her, but 90 of them are feminine, that means she only has to s!it test and WORK with the last 10. If she plans on giving each guy 10 s!it tests thats 900 less s!it tests she has to do. For her it's all about work, effort, and numbers..

As for gay men, think about this guys. The more men that hook up with each other, the more free women in the pool there are for us.

 

[Colossus]

Anybody is capable of anything, and if you don't believe that you are deluding yourself. Keep that in mind when chronicling the evils of women. Women are no more or less capable of terrible deeds than men, the difference is they have a special brand of evil. It's manipulative, insidious, conniving, unconscionable emotional destruction. Men will assault someone's body but rarely someone's SOUL in the way a woman will. Furthermore, men generally have moral code to varying degrees, whereas women mainly have situational morality on the basis of self-preservation.

Women have been the weaker sex for thousands of years and they have evolved to get what they want through subversive means. Since we dont live in the days where we can just club them over the head anymore, it behooves us to study their behaviors to avoid getting played.

You may trust a good woman who has been carefully screened and selected, but you should always verify.

 

[Don the Legend]

You may trust a good woman who has been carefully screened and selected, but you should always verify.

Right On!

There is some great advice on this thread!

The thing that help me to focus on what I wanted was to make of list of the values that I wanted in a woman. If you only go on looks, you are going to run into some of the situations that have been posted here. Values last longer than looks.

Looking back on my dating life, I would have not dated many of girls I dated had I had a list of what is really important and that is values. Knowing what I know now, I taking the 5-10 minutes of really knowing what is important values you want in woman. Most people will take the time and have of list of things they want in brand new car but not take that same time with what they want in a long term girlfriend/wife. It amazes me.

Good luck

 

[In2theGame]

Holy cow dude, how do you not see this coming?

If a woman is keeping anything private after 5 years together... RED EFFING FLAG

At least once a year you have to make sure ANY female is being honest with you.

Check that phone.
Surprise visit where she is supposed to be at.
Make sure her car is supposed to be where she says it is.
Check that FB account messages.

Standard procedure dude, I mean even if you don't do any of this stuff and still notice a high value for privacy in her life SPIN PLATES!!!

I will not honestly commit to a woman that has secrets on her phone.

Never ever no way no how.

In the end I honestly don't care who she bones, as long as I can bone other women i'm happy. And if what i'm looking for is a decent LTR i'll find one while i'm boning her on the side with her thinking were committed the whole time just like she did to you. Play the game dude, because it's playing you no matter what.

Why do you think i was so hurt & in shock, I didn't see ANY red flags and she didn't act or do anything unusual. At first I did those things and she never gave me a reason to suspect she was doing anything. She was always on point with doing whatever i asked her to do and stayed with me at my place. The relationship began getting stronger and more serious as our years together went on. Family started getting involved and it got to the point where everyone "Knew" we were going to get married. I was always the one in the back of my mind scared of getting the shaft and when i finally thought about it, I said She treats me very well, she does things that show that she does love and and her parents like me alot as well as my family liking her alot. I went forward with the mentality that this was going to become my Wife soon.

I will tell you the craziest things about how this whole thing started and how i suspected something was wrong. It may sound "Supernatural" but honest to God this is how it started....

I was in the starting phase of putting together a client base for a business i was building with Financial Markets. A client called me one night and said he is going to start the client account with $50,000. I was very excited about this as I put a lot of work into speaking with investors and getting all the paper work done. I texted my then girlfriend and told her about it and she was excited and wrote something along the lines of "Thats great baby! Miss you Love you so much" I wrote back "Thanks babe, I will call you later. Love you too" I went to families house to play a game of Poker and some drinks. When i got home i called her and everything was just as it has always been... Normal conversation with the Girlfriend. We said our I Love you's and she said she was coming over the next day. We got off the phone and i went to sleep. I will never forget this but the next morning I was having a flash type of dream that she was having sex with some guy. I woke up like you would during a nightmare. It felt so real that i had an uneasy feeling in my gut (you know what im talkin about) I got up from the bed and texted her to call me. 3 Hours went by without a text back and this was HIGHLY unusual. With every passing minute that gut feeling kept telling me something was wrong. I finally called her and she didnt answer the phone, I tried to call again No answer. On any other given day, I would have just thought she will call me later shes probably busy or with her Mom. When i began getting really worried after the 4th hour i was close to calling her Mom to see if everything was alright when i finally got a text from her. All it said was "Im getting on the train". So for 4 fvcking hours thats all i get back? Right there i knew something was wrong for sure and i couldnt stop thinking about that dream of her having sex with some guy.

After about another hour she called me and sounded like she had been crying. I kept asking what was wrong over and over and all she kept telling me was that she felt lost and depressed. I said WTF happened? I was going crazy wondering what was going on but again, deep down i couldnt get that dream out of my head. She sounded spaced out and i offered for her to come over or for us to meet later. She refused and kept saying shes depressed. I finally go to see her that day and she was acting "normal" but would not look at me in the eyes. We went upstairs and i tried having sex with her.... I got her pants off and when i got on top... she busted out crying. That was it... I sat her up and demanded her to tell me WTF was up. I couldnt imagine that she would cheat on me. No matter what she would refuse looking at me in the eyes. I didnt want to believe it and my emotional state was in chaos. she clinged on to me with the tightest hug ive ever gotten from her almost digging her nails in me. We left her apartment and went to my place,... She was 100% quiet, Then i see her grabbing all her Victoria secret panties and throwing out her other ones. I didnt understand what she was doing at the time but she was packing the Lingerie so she could wear it for the other guys. When night came... She asked me if i would take her back if we went on a break, I said we've been together for 5 years why the fvck would we take a break?.... anyway I said No, i dont do breaks.... She went hysterical throwing herself on the floor crying, I had to pick her up. I calmed her down as she was shaking, so i said lets lay down. We ended up going to bed and she latched on to me again tightly. The next day she was quiet again and she went home. I tried calling her and she wouldnt pick up and texted me "I need to be alone"... I started doing some investigating work and this is where the flood of deceptions came pouring in. I found out her secret email account she had from a gaming site, I guessed the password she told me 4 years previously, When i got in i saw conversations with multitude of guys and talking sh!t about me and I'll never forget reading what she wrote to one guy " LoL I hope to break up with him soon, I want other c0ck" "I Hope i made the right choice " after that, I lost it.

The next day she called me crying saying that she feels like shes going crazy.... I stood quiet. She went on to say she feels like the Devil is inside her and she wants to go out fvcking random guys. Shes telling me this sh!t on the phone while im hurting. I hung up and she called me back but i didnt pick up... she left a voice mail again crying saying to please help her. I obviously loved this Woman deeply and i called he back because i was afraid she would hurt herself... Only for her to tell me she had a few ONS the past week without condoms. we got off the phone and i was hurt beyond belief, Thats when my first anxiety attack hit, I had to ask God to help me because i was going crazy while the Woman that i genuinely loved and wanted to Marry was telling me that she was fvcking random guys and tells me that her eyes hurt from a guy cvmming on her face. Taking morning after pills.

I found out further that she sent some Random guy she met online Money, She began using drugs and Drinking. I was in a huge shock at how she was acting. When word got out to family and friends... Her Family and my Family were asking me what i did!!!. Im thinking to myself... WTF did I do!? The finger was being pointed at me, Meanwhile i was the one hurting the most. She switched everything on me and then after that, She gets engaged to another guy and took off from everyone. Thats the last i heard from her.

It has been a long road to mental and emotional recovery since then but I definitely have a traumatic disorder now and anxiety that make me feel panic at random times when something reminds me of her or our breakup. A lot of other fvcked up things were done and said also but i wanted to make this as brief as possible. To this day, I cannot trust another Woman fully like i did. Once that happened, Everything else in my life collapsed... My business, Clients, Lost my Luxury car, My health was in bad shape, Lost all my money, even lost my damn phone, All my friends were no where to be found either. I went at it completely alone with God. I eventually recovered by going to the gym and attaining a body like a fitness model, I got myself back into the Wall st area to build capital for my Business that i have built again. I made a comeback better than ever and dated some gorgeous Women but one thing that i will always carry with me is how bad i was betrayed and i promise myself that i will never, ever again let myself be that vulnerable to a Woman as long as i live.

 

[In2theGame]

IMO the whole "Operation De-Ball" movement as I call it saves women lots of work in the end.. The act of a man adhering to this and being femine lets the women know right off that he isn't fvck or relationship material. It saves HER the work of having to figure it out. Thus it reduces the number of men left. If she has 100 prospective men wanting her, but 90 of them are feminine, that means she only has to s!it test and WORK with the last 10. If she plans on giving each guy 10 s!it tests thats 900 less s!it tests she has to do. For her it's all about work, effort, and numbers..

As for gay men, think about this guys. The more men that hook up with each other, the more free women in the pool there are for us.

The Problem, This is what it's turning into overall:...
http://i.imgur.com/NDnkFx4.jpg

When it should be like this but modern society doesn't want this:...
http://i.imgur.com/Y6IsnKw.jpg

 

[SgtSplacker]

Why do you think i was so hurt & in shock, I didn't see ANY red flags and she didn't act or do anything unusual. At first I did those things and she never gave me a reason to suspect she was doing anything. She was always on point with doing whatever i asked her to do and stayed with me at my place. The relationship began getting stronger and more serious as our years together went on. Family started getting involved and it got to the point where everyone "Knew" we were going to get married. I was always the one in the back of my mind scared of getting the shaft and when i finally thought about it, I said She treats me very well, she does things that show that she does love and and her parents like me alot as well as my family liking her alot. I went forward with the mentality that this was going to become my Wife soon.

I will tell you the craziest things about how this whole thing started and how i suspected something was wrong. It may sound "Supernatural" but honest to God this is how it started....

I was in the starting phase of putting together a client base for a business i was building with Financial Markets. A client called me one night and said he is going to start the client account with $50,000. I was very excited about this as I put a lot of work into speaking with investors and getting all the paper work done. I texted my then girlfriend and told her about it and she was excited and wrote something along the lines of "Thats great baby! Miss you Love you so much" I wrote back "Thanks babe, I will call you later. Love you too" I went to families house to play a game of Poker and some drinks. When i got home i called her and everything was just as it has always been... Normal conversation with the Girlfriend. We said our I Love you's and she said she was coming over the next day. We got off the phone and i went to sleep. I will never forget this but the next morning I was having a flash type of dream that she was having sex with some guy. I woke up like you would during a nightmare. It felt so real that i had an uneasy feeling in my gut (you know what im talkin about) I got up from the bed and texted her to call me. 3 Hours went by without a text back and this was HIGHLY unusual. With every passing minute that gut feeling kept telling me something was wrong. I finally called her and she didnt answer the phone, I tried to call again No answer. On any other given day, I would have just thought she will call me later shes probably busy or with her Mom. When i began getting really worried after the 4th hour i was close to calling her Mom to see if everything was alright when i finally got a text from her. All it said was "Im getting on the train". So for 4 fvcking hours thats all i get back? Right there i knew something was wrong for sure and i couldnt stop thinking about that dream of her having sex with some guy.

After about another hour she called me and sounded like she had been crying. I kept asking what was wrong over and over and all she kept telling me was that she felt lost and depressed. I said WTF happened? I was going crazy wondering what was going on but again, deep down i couldnt get that dream out of my head. She sounded spaced out and i offered for her to come over or for us to meet later. She refused and kept saying shes depressed. I finally go to see her that day and she was acting "normal" but would not look at me in the eyes. We went upstairs and i tried having sex with her.... I got her pants off and when i got on top... she busted out crying. That was it... I sat her up and demanded her to tell me WTF was up. I couldnt imagine that she would cheat on me. No matter what she would refuse looking at me in the eyes. I didnt want to believe it and my emotional state was in chaos. she clinged on to me with the tightest hug ive ever gotten from her almost digging her nails in me. We left her apartment and went to my place,... She was 100% quiet, Then i see her grabbing all her Victoria secret panties and throwing out her other ones. I didnt understand what she was doing at the time but she was packing the Lingerie so she could wear it for the other guys. When night came... She asked me if i would take her back if we went on a break, I said we've been together for 5 years why the fvck would we take a break?.... anyway I said No, i dont do breaks.... She went hysterical throwing herself on the floor crying, I had to pick her up. I calmed her down as she was shaking, so i said lets lay down. We ended up going to bed and she latched on to me again tightly. The next day she was quiet again and she went home. I tried calling her and she wouldnt pick up and texted me "I need to be alone"... I started doing some investigating work and this is where the flood of deceptions came pouring in. I found out her secret email account she had from a gaming site, I guessed the password she told me 4 years previously, When i got in i saw conversations with multitude of guys and talking sh!t about me and I'll never forget reading what she wrote to one guy " LoL I hope to break up with him soon, I want other c0ck" "I Hope i made the right choice " after that, I lost it.

The next day she called me crying saying that she feels like shes going crazy.... I stood quiet. She went on to say she feels like the Devil is inside her and she wants to go out fvcking random guys. Shes telling me this sh!t on the phone while im hurting. I hung up and she called me back but i didnt pick up... she left a voice mail again crying saying to please help her. I obviously loved this Woman deeply and i called he back because i was afraid she would hurt herself... Only for her to tell me she had a few ONS the past week without condoms. we got off the phone and i was hurt beyond belief, Thats when my first anxiety attack hit, I had to ask God to help me because i was going crazy while the Woman that i genuinely loved and wanted to Marry was telling me that she was fvcking random guys and tells me that her eyes hurt from a guy cvmming on her face. Taking morning after pills.

I found out further that she sent some Random guy she met online Money, She began using drugs and Drinking. I was in a huge shock at how she was acting. When word got out to family and friends... Her Family and my Family were asking me what i did!!!. Im thinking to myself... WTF did I do!? The finger was being pointed at me, Meanwhile i was the one hurting the most. She switched everything on me and then after that, She gets engaged to another guy and took off from everyone. Thats the last i heard from her.

It has been a long road to mental and emotional recovery since then but I definitely have a traumatic disorder now and anxiety that make me feel panic at random times when something reminds me of her or our breakup. A lot of other fvcked up things were done and said also but i wanted to make this as brief as possible. To this day, I cannot trust another Woman fully like i did. Once that happened, Everything else in my life collapsed... My business, Clients, Lost my Luxury car, My health was in bad shape, Lost all my money, even lost my damn phone, All my friends were no where to be found either. I went at it completely alone with God. I eventually recovered by going to the gym and attaining a body like a fitness model, I got myself back into the Wall st area to build capital for my Business that i have built again. I made a comeback better than ever and dated some gorgeous Women but one thing that i will always carry with me is how bad i was betrayed and i promise myself that i will never, ever again let myself be that vulnerable to a Woman as long as i live.

#1
Why would you let a woman know you would marry her if she has not even moved in? In my eyes you are bending over backwards for her and this is never a good thing. It just shows you don't have options. This leads us to #2

#2
A woman can never think she has all of your love and appreciation. You have to neg them every once in a while. There have to be situations where you make her feel worthless and that you are angry at them. She has to be kept thirsty for your approval. This is the best thing for HER! Trust me she will live a happy life in this state of mind. If you would have been doing this look at all the hardship you could have avoided her? Think!

When it comes to love i'm a Sith, only through suffering can their be happiness!