Being a don juan does NOT mean being a pathological liar!

[Krassus]

I think someone should get around to establishing some clear rules for these boards. Last time i checked, they were for don juans and those who aspire to become one. But it seems like some people around here have the impression that being a pathological liar means being a don juan. This is NOT the case.

It takes a lot of time and effort to become a don juan, and most men will never achieve this, but it takes nothing to be a pathological liar, and anyone can become one at will. I've met these people before and have no respect for them. They lie to everyone about everything, regardless of whether they're talking to women or their male buddies. They get so used to it that they don't even realize it anymore!

Seriously, i don't wanna discriminate, but i'm getting tired of these people - we all know who they are. For reasons unknown, they think we need or want to hear their opinions, their answers, which are usually limited to 'bullsh1t your way through everything,' regardless of the question. These posts provide no useful information to any of us, and in my opinion, will do our sex lives about as much good as those viagra or penis enlargement spam emails.

If you feel that you have to lie about who you are because a woman wouldn't wanna be with you if she knew what you were really like, then maybe you should sit down and find ways to improve yourself so that you can tell women the truth and still get great results. Sure its a hell of a lot easier to lie about it, but that's just sad.

And finally, let this be the last time we hear of the STUPID philosophy behind 'it was done to me so its ok to do it' excuses! Once again, this is STUPID. I can't explain it any better than that. Its a fundamental flaw of human nature and i don't expect everyone to get why this is stupid, but if get it, that's a start.

 

[chlywly]

He's got a point, being a Don Juan is more then about simple words and bending the truth or staying in control... It's a fine line between being confident humble and sincere and between being ego, a lier and affraid. It's a long and tedious process to open yourself up... To see all of your negative qualities, to work on them, to make yourself a better man or woman...

Believe it or not but these forums are certainly about more than just getting good at picking up women, for all these aspects of life are inter-connected. Read some of the posts by Mr.Fingers/Senior Fingers for example you will get my drift

 

[nistelrooy]

excellent point, krassus.

i noticed that disturbing trend too. Lying is addictive too i think. Once you start, I see some people (who i know are just blowing hot air) just go on without even realizing what they're doing.

And if chicks ever find out that you lied, then you're in a bucket full of shyt.

 

[DiamondMind]

Yessir, I agree with you. There are lotsa guys on here who think they can become an 'alpha-male-DJ' with superficial tactics like lying, etc.

If you gotta lie, you ain't a DJ. You have NO self-confidence.

If it was 'done to you' so your just 'giving it back', you should only blame yourself for your poor judgement and choice. You've ALLOWED her to get to you.

If you gotta do any of this kinda stuff, your simply a weak, insecure guy full of fake self-confidence.

Thank you for your attention in this matter

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Sounds like you guys are describing DJ wanna-be's that do not have or do not know how to gain their own personal qualities that would be attractive to women so the revert to what they do best, bullsh1t. I can only imagine the type of women that fall for that crap.

 

[drZaius09]

IT DOESN'T!?!?!?!

That's it, I'm outta here! <door slams shut>

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by Krassus
but it takes nothing to be a pathological liar, and anyone can become one at will.

I'd just like to clarify something here. "Pathological" refers to an abnormal or diseased condition. It is a biological/psychological affliction. By definition, a pathological liar is someone who has no control over their lies as a result of a specific mental debility. Therefore it would be erroneous to state that a person can simply "become" a pathological liar "at will." I think a better description for this argument would be "compulsive liar."

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

For anyone who feels that bullsh1tting is the way to get ahead, read this story that I found on another thread.

Man fakes choking to get women's attention

 

[princelydeeds]

This is really stupid. I hate when people take an extreme position on a non extreme issue. DO I lie to women, sure I do.

Woman= If we do this will I ever hear from you again? Will you respect me, can we still be in a relationship, do you care about me, are you just looking to fvck me and never see me again?

Me= (standing, butt naked with rock hard d1ck in hand, condom on) Umm... of course I will respect you, I just hope this brings us closer together. This isn't an end its a beginning

Did I lie? Yes of course 9 times of 10 I will call her again ( I try not to bone chicks I don't wanna do more than once, unless its 2 AM and Im drunk), Do I give a darn about the girl? probably not. Do I respect her? Hmmm...... depends on the girl. Does this make me a pathological liar, maybe, do I care ummm....no, not at all.

I guess I should be worried about falling off of the addictive lying slippery slope. I mean lying to a chick when I want to have sex means I m gonna start lying to my mother, then my father, sister, brother, aunts, uncles, cousins, my neighbors, the post man, the waitress, my boss, etc. Next thing you know im addicted. "My name is princelydeeds and Im a liar, and thats all Ill ever be."

Everything we do is not tied together. Your doing 80 in a 60 mph zone, cop pulls you over and says "do you know how fast you were going?" You say "no officer, I have no idea how fast I was going couldn't be any more than 60." Does this make you a liar? I think it makes you human and by default, flawed. According to your slippery slope theory. this person is doomed to a life of rehab for pathological liars.

If you don't want to ever lie so be it good for you. I hope you don't ever have to lie. If you do lie to fvkk a chick, then good for you, I hope you get what you want. Such is life, I think we all lie to different degrees. Before someone takes the extreme position that im advocating compulsive lying, No Im not. I just think we all lie to some degree.

Those that claim the sanctimonious high ground just haven't gotten caught yet. Next time you are in a job interview and the boss says "have you ever .........?" You know you haven't ever done it, but you know can, what do you say? I guess lying in that situation will lead to a life of compulsive lying?

 

[Don Ronny]

Does this mean I have to stop telling girls I have a 14" cack, can f*ck for hours and make a 6-figure salary?

Damn

 

[elvis aint dead yet]

I think he overeggagerated his point.

Human beings lie all the time. Does it make it right? Probably not.

But when this site started, and probably before it even came on the net, becoming a DON JUAN was to better oneself, not degrade yourself by lying all the time.

I think the guy who started this post has come across way too many people on this board, and in real life, that think Lying is the way to go, no matter what.

Hey everybody lies and exaggerates.

I stated previously on another post,

"I CAUGHT a 2 foot fish" is told every day.

When in reality you only caught a "2 inch fish".

That's called an exaggeration. Call it a lie if you want, to me, it's what most peole do everyday.

But out and out lying can only get you caught.

The problem with lying is, your gonna get caught. You may get away with it for a long time, but eventually, people will stop coming around you.

I've had friends who would lie to chics, play the game, do all that. Nobody cared. But eventually the same **** he pulled on chics, he started to pull on his friends. Sad part was, the majority of his friends could see his BS a mile away.

And over time, he lost most of his friends cause he tried to play his friends the same way he played girls.

Most people don't take that too kindly.

I think the guy who started this post wasn't talking about people who exaggerate a bit or lie here or there, he's talking more about the many people who think its' cool to out and out lie and "HEY I"v been PLAYED, so i'm gonna play them"

Just remember, if you start out stealing bikes, one day it actually might be your brothers or your best friends bike that you wind up stealing.

 

[Krassus]

Just to clarify something - this post specifically targets compulsive/pathological liars. These are the people who constantly lie about everything (in this case, while trying to pick up women), starting from what they do for a living, to how well they do at the gym and so on. You get the idea. Of course, all humans lie and probably all of us lie when we absolutely have to. But there is a BIG difference between lying when you absolutely have to, and constantly lying about everything.

 

[Knicknack]

we need to seperate the discussion forum into 2 sections. one for TRUE liars who take the moral high ground and lie to themselves for self assurance. we'll call that forum the "TRUE DJ FORUM." no one is allowed to post unless you can show proof that making your woman feel loved and appreciated is your ONLY goal. sex is not to come before you have fully gained her trust and she knows you are LTR material or husband material. this is the essence of a DJ after all.

the other forum will be called the DEGENERATE DJ FORUM. this is only for those fake DJs who only care about sex. this forum features such disgusting topics as ONE NIGHT STANDS and dating and fvcking multiple women at a time. these "DJs" have to LIE to get what they want. only post here if you admit to being a social pariah. your life is circling the drain. everyone who posts in this forum is automatically put on the ignore list of the TRUE DJ FORUM. we would never want these guys currupting the rest of the members.

 

[BobbDobbs]

Pathological liar is probably not the right term. Even if it were a result of a diseased brain, what makes it a lie of importance or not is a subjective call anyhow.

If someone is normally grumpy and suppresses it to get a ONS, is the "lie" particularly egregious? What if he gets the ONS by misrepresenting that he had a six figure salary?

I'm sure everyone realizes that lies are going to backfire if attempting to start an LTR. So we can ignore that case.

As for ONS, though -- what does it matter what lie you use? You've simply presented an apparent reality that the target found attractive.

And one can lie with their behaviors without uttering a single verbal lie. If you go into any relationship where you know in advance you just want to have sex and not an LTR -- if you simply allow the girl to conclude you are interested in an LTR and never correct her assumptions (lie of omisson), any ultimate pain she feels is going to be the same as if you verbally lied to her.

Nevertheless, it is common not to know how well like someone in the long term, so it is a convenient excuse not to commit. But it is still a lie if you know you have no intention of committing, yet you lead her on.

In this case the ultimate realization of truth or the withheld lie result in the same emotional outcome after the split up.

Seems to me that gentle lies in any non-LTR situation are better than harsh truths. The only other alternative is to become a monk.

 

[Krassus]

Knickback, your post is the perfect example of why diving these boards up would be extremely difficult, if not impossible. It seems that not everyone even agrees on what the definition of a Don Juan is. So before we go any further, we need to get that cleared up.

I don't have the experience of some of the people here, so i'll leave it to them to provide us with a clear definition of the DJ mindset and lifestyle. However, what i can tell you is that i don't think that our aspirations is what separates us.

What i'm trying to say is that the desired end result, whether it be one girl or many, is not what matters. What matters is how we achieve it (or don't). Some people (myself included) don't want to settle down with anyone just yet, but that's simply a matter of taste and has little to do with whether we're true DJs or not.

I think there are two main types of people here: those who are getting results and those who aren't. The first group is divided into those who have the DJ mindset and those who don't - they both get results, but in different ways. The other is also similarly divided, but one group aspires to become DJs and tries their best to get results and the other just sits and does nothing.

So i think that if we were to divide things up, there should be a board for people who are either getting or trying to get results USING THE DJ MINDSET, and another board for everyone else.