Anyone ever read the book Influence : The psychology of persuasion" from Cialdini?

[BornWinner]

Yeah, did any of you read it before? How do you find it? Does it help you in scoring with women?
Give your feedbacks. Thanks

 

[CharmaLeo]

I love that book and would recommended to anyone. It has helped me more at work than with chics. Don't get me wrong though, you can certainly use the principles women.

I found it at amazon looking for influence books.

I like "How to win friends and influence people" better to apply on women.

 

[JB101]

Cialdini's book is brilliant. Highly recommended for anyone in business.

You see the principles all the time when dealing with women.

Social proof - Easy. Walk into a bar or club with 2 hotties on your arms and you'll have instant social proof and status. You've just gone up in other girls eyes. When you discuss your past experience with girls, it's the same thing. If other women find you attractive, then you must be good, right?

Commitment and Consistency - The entire "bridge" concept. Build actions one on top of another.

Authority - This is synonomous with "player", "stud", "jerk"; basically guys who get girls. Build authority by the way you dress, the way you speak, etc.

Liking - The whole basis for establishing some sort of rapport with a girl. The DJ Bible is filled with examples.

Scarcity - Playing hard to get!! Another classic device that's used. We want what we can't have.

Reciprocation - The DJ Bible shows us how masculinity and femininity reciprocate each other. It's a game of give and take. Give a girl the right signs (C&F, kino, EC) and she'll reciprocate.

The entire DJ process can be broken down from these 6 principles. Powerful stuff!

 

[2xp]

i saw someone praising this book here a few weeks ago and i decided to try it.

i like the practical studies he has collected throughout his career, studies that seem logical, or other that really seem counter-intuitive but are true. there's one that may interest everyone here :

an experiment showed that newly-born babies, especially the girls, look more often and smile to the beautiful ones. the ratio is quite high. that means that we have an inner instinct, deep inside us, that attracts us to the handsome people => Looks does matter then !!

there is also the one that shows that well-dressed and well-groomed people have automatically more respect than people who are dressed normally. having a business suit or a (fake) police uniform for example makes people obey your orders easily, even really weird ones => Looks does really matter !!!!

taller guys and smiling people are seen as more confident and more successuful. again, this is prooven as an automatic&inconcsious reaction => Looks are essential !!!!!!

there is also the section where he explains how we react in conversations. the most extraordinary part where he explains introducing the word "because" makes people obey your whishes. for example, the case where one student wants to bypass everyone saying : "can i use the photocopying machine now?" => this was like 10 % rate. then saying " can i use the xerox machine because i am in a hurry and i have a class now ?" => 96 % rate. then saying " can i use the xerox machine because i have to make a couple of copies". you'd believe everyone will say no as the "because" introduced NOTHING. well, practically it doesn't happen like this. there was almost 90 % success rate. just saying because persuades people. amazing, isn'it?

cool book... however, this guy is a psychologist and i really didn't like how he finished every chapter, when he explains how we can avoid the "social proof" reasons or the "consistency" tools. he always say "bla... bla .... discuss with the guy/girl then tell him he wants to use the social proof thing ... bla .... bla .... you are trying to fool me with the liking thing ..."

anyway, go buy the book, you'd learn human being have so many automatic reactions. and that there are people out there who would use them.

 

[BornWinner]

I have the book with me now

So far, I've read a little of the book until the reciprocation chapter. But I don't see how this could be applied to women when DJING.

For example, buying women a lot of gifts, taking them to expensive dinners will not make her feel obligated to be your GFS. So I dont see how reciprocation works in this manner.

Any comments on that one?

 

[BornWinner]

Hello?

Any replies??

 

[2xp]

it's more complicated than that.
don't forget the scarcity principle.
also giving women flowers for no special reason and expecting a special reward&consideration for that gift will get you shot down.

again, this should be field tested. you'll know then how to use it with proper timing & balance.

anyway, nobody here said that this book is a reference in the DJ world. just a couple of things to know.

 

[ClosetMisogynist]

Re: I have the book with me now

Originally posted by BornWinner
So far, I've read a little of the book until the reciprocation chapter. But I don't see how this could be applied to women when DJING.

For example, buying women a lot of gifts, taking them to expensive dinners will not make her feel obligated to be your GFS. So I dont see how reciprocation works in this manner.

Any comments on that one?

You are confusing things here. First you only use small things that are inexpensive. USED SPARINGLY too. a little goes a long way. Than you don't put her on a pedestool. So when you give her something she treasures it by the law of comparison. You are infrequent a gift giver and gave a small object vs a constant gift giver who tries to buy the affection. Remember the Harry Christnas used a crappy cheap flower to get donations from the examples in the book.

I used this book for my class text in persuasion theory.

I also recomend Artful Persuasion if you aren't a psych major. Same type of book with the basics too.

 

[legolas]

Buy that book today!!!! It is the single most important book in social psychology, although it is not recongnized academically. Too bad, we'd have smarter people graduating if they included it.