I'm a 16 year old in highschool (sophomore.) I'm almost 6'2, and I weigh 175 lbs. I've never been very successful with girls, and I really don't know why. Up until this year, no girl ever really showed interest in me, but I started growing, and I lost weight. Last year I was 5'9 and 185 lbs. So I gained about 5 inches of height and lost 10 lbs. A problem still exists though: Girls I like never like me back, but girls I show no interest in want me! WTF is up with this. I got asked to homecoming by 3 different girls, but if i'm being honest, none of them were very attractive. I could do better, a lot better. I'm by no means ugly, and I'm not fat either, although I once was chunky. Why do girls I show no interest in, or dislike, like me? And why do younger girls i.e freshman and 8th graders like me?????? For once I would like a girl I actual show interest in show interest in me. I would much rather go back to girls showing no interest into me, instead of girls I dislike "wanting" me.
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Am I cursed????
- Thread starter Jokerlsk
- Start date
Okay, actually you're right. I act more nonchalant with girls I don't like. How could I start making myself acting that way around girls i do like? When i'm with girls I like I end up trying to be the center of attention. I really need to work on that. What do you recomend i read from the bible?
Igetit!
Moderator
You're not cursed Jokerisk. You're going through something known as adolescense. Also,you have a lack of understanding about how attraction works for women. It's a lot to get into,but for the short term what you can do is (and this will seem absolutely crazy) switch your behaviors with the girls.
The way you normally act with the girls you like,use that behavior with the girls you don't like. And the way you would normally act with the girls you don't like,use that behavior with the girls you do like.
I know,I know,it sounds crazy. I understand that. But if you keep doing what you've been doing,you'll keep getting what you've been getting. So if you're happy with what you've been getting from girls,then don't change,and continue doing as you have been. Otherwise,you'll have to try something else.
The way you normally act with the girls you like,use that behavior with the girls you don't like. And the way you would normally act with the girls you don't like,use that behavior with the girls you do like.
I know,I know,it sounds crazy. I understand that. But if you keep doing what you've been doing,you'll keep getting what you've been getting. So if you're happy with what you've been getting from girls,then don't change,and continue doing as you have been. Otherwise,you'll have to try something else.
You're trying too hard to impress them. When you try too hard girls clearly notice this and they know why. They know you're trying to impress them and therefore chasing after them. When you chase after girls they run from you.! Let them come to you.Jokerlsk said:
Read all the bible. It'll do you no harm.
#41
Senior Don Juan
It's tough for you to comprehend, and you'll hate hearing it, but you're only 16.
At your age, just have fun with everything -- honestly, the best thing you can do right now, if you really want to enjoy a life filled with the better things, is do well in school and get set up for things as an adult.
Lots of the people you see running around with the hottest girls in high school end up changing tires for the rest of their lives, married to women who ballooned up after their 4th kid. Keep your eye on the prize, keep improving yourself, work hard in school, and you'll be set up to have your pick of the hottest women in college and beyond.
Have fun with the girls, but realize that at this point in your life, they're a fun diversion to the really important stuff.
Just IMO.
At your age, just have fun with everything -- honestly, the best thing you can do right now, if you really want to enjoy a life filled with the better things, is do well in school and get set up for things as an adult.
Lots of the people you see running around with the hottest girls in high school end up changing tires for the rest of their lives, married to women who ballooned up after their 4th kid. Keep your eye on the prize, keep improving yourself, work hard in school, and you'll be set up to have your pick of the hottest women in college and beyond.
Have fun with the girls, but realize that at this point in your life, they're a fun diversion to the really important stuff.
Just IMO.
Nightwing
Master Don Juan
If you act like most guys your age, desparation is probably showing on you a mile away with the girls that you actually like. You're not cursed, it's just all part of the learning process when it comes to getting chicks. Start treating the girls that you actually like the same way you treat the ugly ones.Jokerlsk said:
classy broadside
Don Juan
- Joined
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At age 16, despite what your hormones tell you and what you see every day, you really don't need to find a girl or get anxious about not finding one. Girls your age are fickle beasts with the attention span of a flea. They don't even know what they want yet; they're just emulating what they see in the media and in their peers.
So relax and spend time improving yourself instead of worrying about or chasing girls. They'll chase you in time when they realize what a good catch you are.
So relax and spend time improving yourself instead of worrying about or chasing girls. They'll chase you in time when they realize what a good catch you are.
That's how its supposed to work.
Chicks feed off attention. You have to ration it out carefully. When you don't show much interest, they hunger for your attention. If you give them too much attention, they get bored.
Like cats almost.
There's way more to it. This is a very simple explanation.
Chicks feed off attention. You have to ration it out carefully. When you don't show much interest, they hunger for your attention. If you give them too much attention, they get bored.
Like cats almost.
There's way more to it. This is a very simple explanation.
Thanks guys, but in response to #41, I'm actually a really smart kid, and I do have my priorities in order. I have a 96.5 GPA, and I take all honors and AP classes. I know what I want in life, and I understand that having a girl in my life isn't a neccessity. I just want to live my life to fullest;therefore, I want to have some experience in dating before it's too late
Igetit!
Moderator
That's good to hear man. Hey,I don't call myself "Igetit!" for nothing. But listen,you'll have to pay close attention,and I mean VERY CLOSE to your behavior around these girls. Because if you don't,you'll start acting and behaving the way you used to without even realizing it. Just look at the way the girls are behaving towards you. If they start treating you the way they did in the past,that means that YOU slipped up,and when back to behaving the way you used to.Jokerlsk said:
Peace man.
I remember telling you that the only way i could stop being an AFC is if I could figure out what i was doing wrong. I finally figured it out. I wasn't treating all girls the same, and it was rather obvious. I also never used kino on anyone until last week. I really think it's helped. Too bad i waited until homecoming week to figure it out. Oh, well, there's always next year