About Virginity

[Caldus]

Hey,

After reading the other thread about a guy losing his virginity to a prostitute, I have some questions. I decided to post in another thread so that I wouldn't hijack the other guy's thread.

I'm 19 and still a virgin and I don't think it's a big deal. I used to think it was but I realize that I want to lose it to someone I love. But then I think about how I've never really fallen in love with any girl (just little crushes in high school and that's it). I've been seeing this one girl lately and we've been fooling around in bed but no sex yet. She's fairly attractive and very shy but in a cute way. But I can't say that I love her. I've never loved any girl. It's weird.

Anyway, I get the impression from reading the other thread that virginity becomes a huge issue later on for some reason. I can understand why (most people around 21 have lost their virginity by that time). At the same time I feel like I would regret losing it to some girl that I don't truly love. She was happy that she wasn't being rushed into it by me (I made that clear) but then after we fooled around she dry humped me (I think that's the proper term) like as though she actually did want sex.

I know this a choice I have to make and noone else, but how many of you guys have actually lost it to someone you truly love (or used to love)? It's hard to tell whether it would be worth it in the long run to wait until I'm ... say 21 or 22 and finally meet a girl that I actually love.

Thanks for any input on this. Just trying to think things through.

 

[Fumbduck]

Hey man...i'm in your same exact situation, word for word in your thread you and I have the same dilemma. From not ever being in love, to having your girl 'dry-hump' while fooling around. She knows that i'm the big "V", because my freind and i were hanging out with her and that topic came up. I never told her directly. I clearly stated to her that i don't have a problem with it, when she finally came out and asked me about it the other day. I replied that am waiting for someone I care about to do it with so i will not regret it. (She dosen't believe me one bit btw, claiming "i dont act like a virgin") My friends are supportive of this decision, many say "I wish I held out for someone i liked/loved."

You said it becomes a big problem after are 21 or 22? If I still am by that age, i won't have a problem with it. I read somewhere on this website that if you dont have a problem with it, she wont. Don't let her pressure you into anything- its your choice no one elses.

 

[PeeGee]

I never geniunely felt that my virginity was a big deal when I had it, and when I lost it, it wasn't a big deal either (considering the mishap, that's a good thing). Anyway, how you feel about it is up to you -- the difference I guess would be that she would have to accept your stipulations of losing your virginity (dating for a certain period of time, getting married, etc). If she doesn't then you next her and move on.

 

[Caldus]

Sorry I forgot to mention that she was a virgin too which surprised me since she's fairly attractive. So Fumbduck, all your friends say that they wished they would've lost it to someone they actually love?

Is there anything wrong with me since I've never been in love with a girl before? I feel stupid asking this but I mean is anyone else feeling this way?

 

[Andromax]

I'm 22 and I've never been in love.

Thought I was a couple times, but it fizzled out so I guess I wasn't.

My dad said he fell in love for the first time when he was freakin 46.

Crazy...

You are 19. I dont think it's wierd that you have never fallen in love. It's quite normal.

Besides, the definition of "love" is so general that its dangerous to use it without a sentance or two of explanation.

 

[Climax]

ffs!

When you in your death bed one day, do you think that you will really care who u lost your virginity to? Virginity has been made into SUCH a big deal, wtf? sex is sex, no matter if its for the 1st time, or the 100th time, so whats the big deal? Just because they are the 1st person that you have sex with doesnt mean sh!t!

Virginity is just like turning 18.... its just another birthday... what nakes it "more special"? that you are an adult? then why do ppl celebrate a 21st? and a 50th? (half a century) BIG DEAL!

Unfortunatelly we are all sucked into that stupidity of making big deals of things that arent really a "big deal", and if you will join the rest of the world in making a big deal of your virginity, then you will just loose out on oppurtunities, and one day when u are 80 years old and unable to have sex like u are now, u will regret every time that you make the stupid decision of "keeping yopur virginity" *sigh*

It actually makes me SICK of how people make such a big deal of their virginity!

If i had the chance, and was STILL a virginn, i would prove my point to you all and loose my virginity to a donkey .................................................................................................................................................................. ahem..... that was a joke by the way.... but i think you get my point


Now stop delaying and wasting oppurtunities, and just BANG THE B!TCH ALREADY!!


Laterz...

 

[Andromax]

Virginity is just like turning 18.... its just another birthday... what nakes it "more special"? that you are an adult? then why do ppl celebrate a 21st? and a 50th? (half a century) BIG DEAL!

I can see why some people make a big deal about it, not that I do.

When I lost my virginity, my girlfriend at the time was a bit older and "more experienced" and thought it was so awesome that she had been the only one to jump my bones. We were pretty committed for a couple years, and the sex was pretty intimate. She said that thinking about me having only been with her made her feel so much more closer to me..

So you see, in terms of "waiting for marriage" or "that special someone" it does have a bit of "sentimental" value for some. It did for my ex.

'course I was thinkin, "man I need to get some new puss"

Thoughts, Aequitas?

 

[Nightspark]

Oi another virginity post

Why do people put to much emphasis on the damn thing anyway!? It's not part of anything that makes you, as you are.

Most AFC-like action comes because of this little thing called virginity. Ive seen it before and experianced it... OHHH SHe's a virgin! I'm gonna be a lil bit nicer to her so i can get to deflower her or wahteva....

Honestly it's nothin, and i know there are gonna be some saying.... Ohhh, but i dont wanna regret losing it to someone i dont love.... ohhhkay honestly! Life is too fcuckig short to regret anything!

Just go out there and have a blast!

 

[Centaurion]

aqua has a good point there.

This whole 'loosing virginity' thing has been hyped up. Trust me on this one when I say that it's a huge anticlimax. As a wise dude once said,

"On that faithful day I realized that sex was just like mastrubation, but with more effort"

When I lost my virgnity I was like 'WTF is that it!!??' It's not a big deal. Now, just go and hump something like a Duracell Bunny on Viagra.

 

[Caldus]

~ªêQµïTª$~: I see your point and I've been thinking about that a lot lately. In fact I used to desire a relationship so bad but now I don't because I realize that I just turned it into a big deal when in reality it was no big deal. I don't need a girl to be happy. I only thought I did because I would watch many couples walking around. I'm glad I don't waste my energy anymore trying to be in a relationship because that's just a waste of energy.

Anyway, I'm all for screwing this girl, but I just wanted to ask you non-virgins whether you now regret losing your virginity to someone you didn't actually love. I guess I am making this a big deal when it shouldn't be, but I just wanted opinions I guess.

Thanks for your input though.

 

[Nightspark]

Caldus, buddy i dont regret it because i stopped holding it like it was my life support or something... As soon as i saw it as just another useless thing, i was acting different... since i wasnt thinking about it i i had my first (and bloody long) taste of sex last year the teh backseat of the car!

Hah how's that for a first timer venue

And no i ddnt love her... and no i wasnt dating her either! She was my Fbuddy for a little while until i told her to go away because she was becomming too attatched

 

[sfalexi]

Well most people here know how I lost mine (to a hooker in the bathroom stall of a nightclub)

I thought about it the next day, and the part that I do regret, is that I didn't choose to lose it to the latina hooker. She was hotter.

Honestly, it'd been holding me back. I used to be of the mentality of losing it in a significant relationship, but after a few of those went by without sex coming into play, it was frustrating. Plus, whenever I was on dates or talkin' to girls, I'd feel nervous when they ask how many girls I've had sex with, and I noticed that my virginity was holding ME back, and also holding THEM back from messing around with me (I guess they didn't want me to get attached just like most guys here hate that happening to them).

After losing it recently, I thought to myself, "That was it? I mean, yeah it felt good. But losing it wasn't really the ordeal I thought it was gonna be."

Honestly, nothing's changed in my life. Still hang out with the same friends, still do the same stuff (classes, work, etc.), however it's a HUGE weight off my chest.

I'm sure that sex will mean more when it's with someone that I actually really care about, but until I meet someone like that, I see no reason (now) not to get out there and start practicing.

Alexi

 

[Climax]

hmmm.....

Originally posted by Andromax
I can see why some people make a big deal about it, not that I do.

When I lost my virginity, my girlfriend at the time was a bit older and "more experienced" and thought it was so awesome that she had been the only one to jump my bones. We were pretty committed for a couple years, and the sex was pretty intimate. She said that thinking about me having only been with her made her feel so much more closer to me..

So you see, in terms of "waiting for marriage" or "that special someone" it does have a bit of "sentimental" value for some. It did for my ex.

'course I was thinkin, "man I need to get some new puss"

Thoughts, Aequitas?

The only reason that it had that "sentimental value" for her is because she was too, sucked into believing all the b.s about her "feeling so much more closer to you" ... Where did she get that from? movies, girl talk/girl friends, what she has heard from other ppl, read it somewhere on a forum or article in a magazine, etc ...

... Maybe she was happy about the fact about "being your 1st", but again, the only reason that she felt that way is because of what people make it out to be (loosing your virginity).

You also musnt forget that women are alot more "emotional" than men are, so the whole "loosing your virginity" becomes alot more "meaningfull" to them than it is for men. why? Because they too, like men, give in to the whole theory of your virginity being this "sacred" thing that is "so special", but seeing as that they are alot more emotional than us men, it will mean more to them.

But the reality is, is that loosing your virginity is nothing HUGE, maybe its something slightly "special" and/or "memmorable" to YOU because its YOUR 1st time having sex, but thats ALL it is, your 1st time, nothing HUGE, like the rest of the world make it out to be.

Another thing about keeping your virginity... well one day when u get married, u dont want to have a wife that has had sex with 100 other guys in her past, so people prefer to stay "clean" untill marrige. The saying "Dont do upon others what you dont want to be done to you" applies here, in a way, because just like you dont want your furture wife/gf to have slept with TOO many guys in their past, and the same applies for girls, they dont want to have a man that has had sex with TOO many other girls in their life... after asking several of my girl and guy friends, they all said that "TOO many is a turnoff"... So what i am trying to say here, is that women AND men might also be scared of that (being a turnoff) because of sleeping with others, and think that the one that thewy love one day will be turned off by them having sex with alot of other ppl in their past. But what i say to this, is that if they dont like it, they can f*ckoff, and you can just find a girl that will accept you as you are and what u did in your past

Overall... its YOUR life, NOT theirs, so YOU do what YOU want to do, and dont let anyone else influence you and convinve you otherwise! Remember, u only get ONE chance to live this life, and time is running out, and we are all getting old, so DONT waste any MORE time, get out there, and do what YOU want to do, reguardless if you are a virgin or not!


Laterz...

 

[Caldus]

Overall... its YOUR life, NOT theirs, so YOU do what YOU want to do, and dont let anyone else influence you and convinve you otherwise! Remember, u only get ONE chance to live this life, and time is running out, and we are all getting old, so DONT waste any MORE time, get out there, and do what YOU want to do, reguardless if you are a virgin or not!

Very good point.

 

[TizZle]

All I got to say is once you lose it you'll want to have lots more sex(unless you just have a bad first experience). I view sex as both natural and fun.

 

[Double]

you think like a preachers daughter, it is only sex man

 

[Chris Gamble]

About 3 weeks ago I lost my virginity to a 21 yr old, we are not dating, not in a relationship or anything. I was kind of "holding out" you could say to find that "special" person to lose it to, and I do care about this girl, but I don't see a LTR coming out of this right now. I'm glad I've lost it! It's opened my eyes to other things and more importantly, its fun! My advice to all the virgins out there is get as much sex as you can while you are young, sure in a perfect world we would want to lose it to the "love of our life" but in reality that's not going to happen. Have fun out there and be safe.

-Chris

 

[Caldus]

Originally posted by Chris Gamble
About 3 weeks ago I lost my virginity to a 21 yr old, we are not dating, not in a relationship or anything. I was kind of "holding out" you could say to find that "special" person to lose it to, and I do care about this girl, but I don't see a LTR coming out of this right now. I'm glad I've lost it! It's opened my eyes to other things and more importantly, its fun! My advice to all the virgins out there is get as much sex as you can while you are young, sure in a perfect world we would want to lose it to the "love of our life" but in reality that's not going to happen. Have fun out there and be safe.

-Chris

Why do you say that you will never lose it to the love of your life? Just curious.

 

[Climax]

errr....

Originally posted by Caldus
Why do you say that you will never lose it to the love of your life? Just curious.

in the days of today, 99% of people wont.. just look at the world... look at the mentality of the people these days! People loosing their virginity @ the age of 14 etc... the chances of you loosing your virginity to the love of your life is REALLY minimal!

 

[whistler]

For me, you can't really have an intimate relationship without regular sex.

So that means the first time you do it with a girl can't be that intimate and amazing, because the relationship isn't fully underway yet.

It is what you make it. And it's not exactly a religious experience, just a more complicated version of j*cking off. It's a natural behavior that should be a normal part of your life as an adult, like brushing your teeth.

Was the first time you brushed your teeth a religious experience. Do you care about it?

You've been capable of having sex for several years. Have at it.