AAAgent's Approach journal

[AAAgent]

I presume you're belgian, from gent? what do you study, are you in a fraternaty, which places do you go out?

haha i'm actually from the U.S.. I'm finishing my bachelors in business administration this term. I am not in a fraternity but was thinking about charting lambda phi epsilon at my school but since im already a graduating senior i decided to let the other kids handle that. my last girlfriend was in a sorority.

i mostly go out to bars, clubs, pubs, etc. The school i go to is in city so its nice to walk around when the weathers nice.

Well i met this japanese chick a few weeks ago and i'm kinda digging her. So i'm going to try to get a date within the next couple of weeks.

But right now i just have too many chicks around me and its causing MAJOR drama. HBT broke up with her bf to go after me but i rejected her...now her ex is in the country. HBC finally broke up with her bf a month ago and is officially trying to win my heart over. I have a SPECIAL dinner coming up that she said she owes me...don't know how that will go. I see HBV warming up to me even though she has a bf still. We joke around alot more with some kino and flirting but i really have no clue what i want to do. I really have no desire to bang any girls that aren't korean/attractive. HBG i don't know how that's going, we've hung out and studied twice and she text's and calls me here n there but i haven't seen any IOI's as of yet.

Here's the list of possible MAJOR DRAMA scenario stems:

HBC- has always had sexual tension from her
HBT- broke up with her bf to chase me but i rejected her. no her ex flew from japan to our city. he probably doesn't know about me but still

HBV- im good friends with her ex that hates her but he doesn't know im talking to her. Her current bf is in my physics class and he doesn't know about it either.

HBG- things are just platonic right now but i think i may see some IOI's soon once we get more comfortable.

HBK(k=korean)- She's a new girl a met about 2 months ago and we have been just hanging out. She's not really attractive, has a bf in korea, My boi i think is interested in her but since he has a gf he won't admit it and our other mutual friend which is mad into her is basically LJBF'ed by her. I definately see major IOI's from her. she's hugs me all the time, we text, we talk sexual and stuff. I'm just trying to keep on good relations just so i can meet her friends but all it does it make them more interested in me.

HBJ(japanese)- in my friends class that i go to every week just to chill. I definately see IOI's with her slowly. I like her personality but she's under 21 so she can't drink when we go out. I haven't found a good enough way to connect with her so i can ask her out plus i always get yelled at by the teacher because we get talking and it disrupts her class.

ontop of all this my ex is still contacting me.

i feel like some of my guy friends are starting to not like chilling with me just because all the chicks tends to show more interest in me. Yesterday my mutual friend with HBK went out to drink with me, HBK and him. The whole time she turned her whole body facing me and just kept asking me sexual questions and ignoring him. The weird thing is their very good friends too, and i sometimes think they might be friends with benefits too.

 

[AAAgent]

haha im glad all that drama and more is over. I'm going to try to pick this back up.

Instead of being approached i want to do the approaching.

 

[AAAgent]

well just got back from my Hong Kong trip.

Field report:

went clubbing had mad fun. My friend pushed me into some girl that seemed really interested in me and my body. In Asia, they don't go to the gym apparently. she bought my drinks, danced and hooked up with her. she asked me if i was going to move to HK and i saw not sure, maybe/maybe not.

that was last friday.

on thursday the next week i asked out that hot girl that i bombed with at my office 2 months before. She went back to work in the HK office. Simply sent her an email saying.

"Hey hb9,

Are you free to grab a bite to eat later?

AAA"

we went to grab some fresh juice instead and she also asked me if i was going to move to hong kong. wth, yes i want to move there but i don't want to move because of a girl. Can't we just enjoy our time here and not worry about tomorrow for a second. Maybe i was acting that way because it was my vacation and i just wanted to have fun.

anyway, gotta start hitting the gym again.

 

[AAAgent]

this is a July FR

Week before the 4th was in AC. Went clubbing for a friends bday. The bday girl was kicked out of the club so we carried her back to her room. get back there and see one of her friends there hanging out.

Well the friend says she going downstairs to get her friend because they don't have a key up. I told her i'd go with her. She's pretty *****y but i just ignore her. I told her my name already but she insists on calling me the wrong name.

HB: what's your name again.
AAA: its AAA

HB: BBB?
AAA: yeah, sure whatever you want.

I was kinda annoyed and not in the mood for drama.

Well we starting talking a bit more and she gets a little nicer and starts to look at me sexually. We get downstairs in the lobby and i ask her where her friend is. She looks at me as if she's going to eat me, i just ignore it and keep looking for the friend.

As i'm looking around the elevators she's grabs me and throws me into a corner and begins to make out with me. After a few seconds and realize we are doing this in the main lobby. I stop and head back up to the room. She follows.

We had two rooms so as i'm walking back up, i pretend to walk with her to her room and turn around and ditch her and meet back at the birthday girls room. All i hear her say is:

HB6: where's AAA? AAA?

Then my friend walks out of the room and was like yo she thinks i'm yo and is trying to get with me. I keep telling him he can be me if he wants and keep pushing him back to the room but he refuses.

So we all head back to the club and i bring up the rear with the girl. Make out some more and get another drink and she tells me to some excuse about leaving something back in the room. So i said i'd go with her.

We get back to the room and obviously she can't find what she's looking for.

She sits on the chair and fingers for me to come over. I just shake my head no. I see her start to kind of tear and i say fine and go out to make out with her. I didn't really want to fvck her but she ends up basically stripping me, and i tried to stop her like 10 times, since i was having a hard time staying hard but i managed to stop as someone knocked on the door. Luckily we locked it just in case. So i run to the bathroom with all my clothes and get dressed she opens the door.

Worst part now, she follows me all over. I didn't want all the other girls to know i just fvcked her but its obvious since door was locked, i get out of the bathroom, and my hair is all messed up. Plus she keeps trying straddle me wherever i sit. I just keep getting up and moving. After like 5 times of doing this and just going to talking to my friend she starts crying and her friends tell me to leave. I go back to my friends rooom across the hall.

Next morning my friend said she knocked on our door to see if we were okay and then went back to her room. We just bounced. I felt bad for making her cry so i called around and got her number from a friend. Called her 3 days later since i had to wait till after the 4th weekend.

Sent her a text to tell her i would be calling her. She picks up and i asked her if she was alright and that i'm not sure why she was upset but i hoped she would feel better. We chit chatted about school/work. then i told her i had to get going but i enjoyed spending time/talking to her and that i'd see her the next time i see her.

She apologizes for anything she did unappropriate over the weekend. She tries texting me the next day to create small talk but i didn't want to lead her on so i kept it short. Then a few days later i left for a 3 week out of the country trip. So that basically ended it.

 

[AAAgent]

2 weeks before halloween.

went out to a lounge and saw a girl grilling me. My friend even told me. This is the same friend that the previous girl thought was me and tried to make out with.

Well i waited until we left and walked up to her while all my friends are saying bye to her friends.

AAA: hi, whats your name?
HB: hb8
AAA: i'm AAA

she just looks intrigued.

AAA: I lean over and whisper in her ear "What's your number?"
HB8: sorry i don't give out my number like that....

i pull out my phone and open up the dial pad

AAA: What's your number? I want to take you out to dinner sometime.
HB8: she's looks very confused and looks at my other friend who is apparently her friend and he just shrugs his shoulders.

Sorry i don't give out my number like that......

AAA: Alright, well it was nice meeting you.

Then we left and went to the next club where some girl kept trying to dance and grind on me, she also got us in VIP so i guess it was worth it. I felt pretty baller in this attempt as I knew the approach was pretty bold and straight forward and the fact that she was flustered just shows i need to work on it a bit. I also didn't care that it was a rejection.

----

Dressed up as red ranger for halloween and everyone loved it. No real FR as i didn't make any approaches but i had tons of fun.

 

[AAAgent]

Yesterday.

Tough mudder is next week and i went out to my team mates crib in LIC. We ran to and all around Roosevelt Island then back and back up to the bridge again. I stopped early because of a foot injury so i only did 7 miles.

We finished showered and went to grab a bite to eat at this amazing chicken wings place in Brooklyn. I got grilled cheese since i'm a vegetarian. Saw this HB9 asian chick working there. I could tell i wasn't her type since were in hipsterville in brooklyn.

I knew one thing for sure though, i would regret it if i didn't ask her out. We pay the bill and leave. Friends are chilling outside i told them i had to go in real quick. introduce myself and ask her out.

AAA: Hi, i know your probably busy but i just wanted to come introduce myself. I'm AAA.

HB9: she's not really into it and kinda looks away but she tells me her name.
I'm Angie.

AAA: Well i know your probably busy but I wanted to see if you were free for dinner sometime?
HB9: I actually have a boyfriend. I appreciate it though.
AAA: well it was nice meeting you.

This attempt i for some reason didn't feel confident. Maybe because there was no sign of interest before hand and on top of that i couldn't make my attempt smoothe. It was pretty shotty but i'm glad i asked her though.

 

[AAAgent]

FR: Sweet to sour.

a few weeks ago boy introduced me to a girl he was seeing and her friends who came to philly for a roadtrip from NYC. There were 4 of them and 2 were kind of cute.

We hang out first night and we wanted to show them a good time. We end up bar hopping which turns out to be whack since its super whack. I tell them to come to my place since i (family) own a private venue/club. We all go and it turns out to be some GOTH party. We chill and have a few drinks and have a good time. I told them i wanted to show them a once in a lifetime experience which i did.

Next day we chill show them around south street and i see that two girls have taken an interest in me, one i found out had a boyfriend which was a turnoff. We club that night and i end up dancing with the one i find cutest and she was single. The girl is clearly into me and my friends know as she asks about me and being vegetarian she was scared to eat meat around me as she thought it may offend me.

Fast forward to being back in NYC. We go out and party hard and crash at one of the girls places. Next morning i wake up and call the girl and ask her out to lunch she agrees but is busy as she is moving and packing her stuff. She ask's for my help but i reluctantly agree. Finish moving and go on our lunch/dinner date.

This amazing 8+ girl just drops from an 8 down to an HB6.

All she talks about is her ex boyfriends and about how she is not looking for anything serious and kinda has casually dated a few guys in pharmacy school here. She talks about how she had to drop a few guys due to their clingyness. total turnoff although i understand that she wanted to emphasize a point. take her home.

i didn't want to write her off yet so i gave her another try.

FF to right before i head out with her again. One of our girlfriends from philly tells my friend this weird cali girl started texting her and chatting.

HB8 (HBcali): Hey HBphilly how are you.
HBphilly: who is this?
HBcali: its me hbcali we met last night at clubx
HBphilly: sorry i don't remember you.
HBcali: send picture message of her face.....


I just found that super creepy.

anyways, i'm heading on a business trip and i text the girl. we agree we both need to buy stuff (her for picking a few things to fix up her new place and me for my trip).

She's really playful and kind acts like my gf already and i just ignore it. We get back to her place and i'm really stressed because this was my first business trip. I ask if she has a drink so tha ti can relax.

We drink and she drinks (she can't drink alcohol as she is allergic so her drinking is a sign that she's trying to get loose). I'm not feeling it as much but she shows me her fully decorated place and starts playing music.

I start busting out laughing in my head as the first song that comes on her play list talks about "I want to kiss you."

then after a while she changes the song to pandora and the first song that is chosen from Pandora mentions "I love you." i'm about to die from laughter inside. Anyways she's sitting on her bed and i'm sitting on her chair until i decide to go sit on her bed.

she gets right up and plops next to me and i have no clue why but i'm majorly turned off by everything that has happened up to this point. I basically tell her i gotta get going and leave.

I see her right when i get back from my trip when we all go to the club. I texted her to see what she was doing but she said she was at a play with her friend from cali. She ends up showing up at the club with this other guy. he's all over her smacking her ass and literally talking to other girls and she does nothing and takes it. this was probably one of her exes or something but he takes her home and probably fvcks her.

This awesome girl turned out to be a total disaster. The other girl that was into me backed off for this girl as she had a bf, and it turned out she strung my other friend along.


Potential lay that turned into total loss of attraction on the females part.

 

[AAAgent]

Just read through all my FR's in the last couple of years and i've been so up and down. Now that i've fully recovered from being depressed, i'm generally pretty happy and down to have fun. I'm not particularly girl crazy/desperate and pick and choose who i talk to but i realize my confidence level is always up and down.

Generally all my direct approaches fail and most of my successful field reports are where the girls come and talk to me. I consider this utter failure. I still don't understand why i sometimes get the jitters/butterflys/approach anxiety. Makes me kind of ashamed as it's been so long and i haven't conquered my fears. I came here to become to overcome my weakness's and so far I don't really see any improvements.

Direct approach successes (getting number) + 1 (ex girlfriend)
Passive approach successes + 3 (two girls i worked slowly to get their number and date both were HB9's)

Direct approach failures - too many to remember but less than 20.

Out of all the FR Log's i've noticed that i've been the most inconsistent and made the least amount of attempts. This is something that has to be changed and honestly, i don't know how to work to increase my consistency as i'm not consistent with anything.

 

[AAAgent]

I'm going to separate my strengths and weakness's so that when i look back, i can clearly see if i've improved.

What i consider my STRENGTHS

1.) I'm confident in my looks.
2.) I'm confident in my abilities to succeed in almost anything I do (as long as i do it) such as work, projects, sports, etc.
3.) I'm a decent height.
4.) I have succeeded and been on hot streaks with success.
5.) I've been elevating my status.
6.) I'm in great shape and have a pretty good body.


What I consider my WEAKNESS'S

1.) I always think whether or not the girl will think i'm attractive.
2.) I think about what other people think.
3.) I bring up the past embarrassing things i've done which increase anxiety.
4.) I'm very conservative when it comes to making moves and sometimes i think about whether or not the girl will want me to make a move or how she will react.
5.) I don't consistently approach and therefore get rusty and miss out on so many opportunities that i regret.


These are my main S & W's. I will work on maintaining my strengths and improving my weakness's.

 

[Vice]

Ups and downs are part of the natural "waves" of life. Just "ride" those "waves", don't get all upset about being upset. That leads to a downward spiral.

And how is having girls coming to YOU failure? That's an ideal situation. It makes things so much easier.

As for approach anxiety, I've realized that the anxiety is going to come up no matter what, unless I have momentum from previous approaches. Accept the anxiety, and channel that energy into motivation towards your approach. And cold direct approaches are the hardest ones to do. Luck plays a major factor, since you don't know what's going on in her life at that particular time.

And as for the momentum, the reason why it's so easy in a club is because you can approach one set after another, whereas during the day, there are gaps in between sets that may cause you to go into your head.

You're putting alot of pressure on yourself that you don't need to be.

 

[AAAgent]

i always tend to be very critical of myself I as expect the very best of myself. My dream has always been to make a significant change in the world and as a MAN, if I can't even go after what i want (in this case approach a woman) how will i ever reach my goal?

I tend to set ridiculous goals for myself way out of reach and i never accomplish them, i've learned to set small short goals in sight. Tackle them one by one and before i even know it the big goal has already been accomplished.

----

I've come up with a new way to work towards improvement of myself. I'm at the point in my life where i'm not desperate for female attention. It's just not my focus, my career and being a better man so i can have a better future, that is my goal. That laid out, a man needs women in his life but it shouldn't be his focus. It's healthy to pursue women i've learned just not to revolve your life around them which is what i used to do.

My first small goal is to approach any woman an HB8 and above. To make this reasonable and a small step towards the next goal, i must talk to her if she meets the following qualifications:

1.) Must be atleast an HB8.
2.) Must be alone/ by herself.
3.) Must not be in a quiet subway far away from me. (if she is close to me i must talk to her)

Now i obviously know i will not make all these attempts, but i need to start somewhere. For every attempt i don't make, i will penalize myself with 1 proactive action towards the business i'm planning on starting. I must then immediately once i get home work and finish that action. This is my punishment and either way, work will get done and i will be one step closer being the man i should be.

I will consistently update my journal to the public so that i keep my word in making these changes.

----

Tips & notes to self

I will start with the canned opener

"Hi, I made a promise to someone close to me that i would never regret not talking to a beautiful girl if I saw one. My name's AAAgent. What's your name?"

This will keep me from debating between openers and decrease my approach anxiety time.

TIP- don't worry about what anyone thinks! I will fail and be embarassed at times but without these experiences how will i ever get better. Expect to make a fool of myself but realize i am not a fool in doing so. A fool is a person who doesn't try and will never have the opportunity to learn and become better.

Note---I am very inconsistent and tend to be very all over the place.....my goal is to be consistent in this trial period to test if i have what it takes to work towards my goal. 3 months of doing this will be my first step.

It will get to the point i'm sure where i will have built up so many tasks to do that i won't want to not talk to a girl anymore and i will be forced to man up, but hopefully i will man up before i'm forced to.

Will be become the man I'm supposed to be doesn't sound like a good question.

I must become the man i'm supposed to be and to do this I must not stray from the path.

 

[AAAgent]

well new years is in AC.

My friend in an attempt to push me past my AA is offering to help me. We were both top 3 best looking asian guys at my highschool he was probably a bit better looking but i was a bit taller.

Well the task is any girl that he think is extremely attractive i will have to talk to her. Every girl i don't talk to i will have to take a shot, this caps out at a max of 15. This is before and after the club as it will be near impossible to talk to a girl inside a super crowded popping club. If you've ever taken lots of shots, they become really nasty and even scary after a certain amount. I'm kind of scared and at the same time excited as i love overcoming hurdles/challenges.

Any tips on approaching girls in atlantic city outside of the club like things to say or how to calm my nerves would be appreciated.

Cheers

 

[AAAgent]

There has been this decent looking girl at the gym. I've seen her multiple times and she's clearly seen me. I don't get any clear interest signs from her and i normally don't approach women at the gym but i really wanted to approach her today. When i was walking out i realized that i regretted not talking to her.

That being said she's the first girl that i have regret for not approaching and therefore i will complete something towards my business now.

 

[AAAgent]

well had a decent NYE. I did see a hb9 who was about 6'1. She was probably my height but with heels was 6'1. After some time of debating how to approach her i just walked up to her and she completely shut me out as in i smiled and said hi and she just gave a disgust omg look and turned her head away. First one of these i've had in a long time. I saw no point in following up from that and just enjoyed the rest of my night.

hope you guys had a better NYE than i did.

 

[ARrocket]

What are your goals with these chicks? It's not really clear to me from the field reports.

 

[AAAgent]

i haven't thought about in a while and thanks for pointing that out.

My goal is to be able to confidently, consistently and successfully approach any attractive woman i see. I generally only approach what i find as hb9's or higher and it takes sometime for me to approach them. I'm not really looking for a girlfriend. I'm just looking to have more plates to spin, have fun, and maybe find a chill girl to compliment me.

Generally all the plates i find are ones that are clearly interested in me and show interest or they are the ones that pursue me. I've only really been successful a handful of times with the women i've approached.

I just want to have fun, mess around, and get successful at approaching women. If i find one that's decent and makes me change my mind about making her my gf then thats great, if not i don't really care.

 

[ARrocket]

I hear ya, pretty much the same with me. I'll try to keep up with this.

How come you're only going after the most attractive girls? Have you had success with less attractive girls already and want another challenge?

 

[AAAgent]

well generally i have hb 6's-8's approach me occasionally (every other month or so) but the reason i mainly approach hb9-10's is because those are the only ones i would regret not talking to. I don't really have a desire to approach hb6-8's not sure why (some are attractive). Maybe i should lower my standards.

 

[AAAgent]

Not really a real approach. We had our annual client party last week and i went and mingled with all my clients that showed up. Mostly people from investment banks, law firms, Private Equity, etc. I introduced myself to a team from a lawfirm and this one girl literally was in love with me. Kept saying i was the best, praised me to all my bosses, would talk to me one on one. Some of her co-workers were hitting on her but she kept telling them i'm awesome. She was one of the many people i talked to that night as it's my job.

Emailed her the next day(as i said i'd email her) and just said it was great meeting her, hope she had a good time and that i enjoyed talking to her and thought we should grab lunch sometime. Email was friday and no response as of yet. A bit surprised and at the same time i'm not because women always play these games.

 

[AAAgent]

As ARocket mentioned, i really don't have any goals with what i'm doing and i'm pretty much all over the place in regards to my experience with approaching.

I think sleeping with mad HB8+'s would be awesome but honestly that's not me. If anyone watches game of thrones, i tend to try to emulate Ned Stark. Honor, loyalty, and courage are extremely important to me.

What I want to get out of approaching women and gaming them is to become experienced but at the same time not a playboy. I want to learn about women more and how to control my emotions with them as i tend to throw myself at the first person i like that actually feels the same way back. It's like a head over heels type thing. I want to juggle a few women at the same time but never lie to them about the other women. If they ask and find out/are unhappy, they are welcome to leave.

My goals:

Still abide my my codes or being honorable, loyal, and brave/courageous.
Getting better at cold approaching hb8's+.
Slowly build up to juggle 2+ hb's in the loop.
Never have to lie/hide from a woman.
Get over my approach anxiety of cold approaching.
Learn how to open women in any setting (this is a big problem for me. I hate opening in public places as i hate drawing attention to myself.)

I'll look over this list later and maybe revise/add/remove to make it more clear and concise.