Swampcamel
Don Juan
Hey DJs,
I haven't been on here in a while, but I felt like it'd be nice to get some outsider perspective since all my few dude friends really lend me is like, "Yea, that sucks for you!!!"
Anyway, so the story:
Was looking for a new place to live, found a room in this house with who I thought was an awesome down-to-earth hippy chick, ended up hanging out with her a ton before I moved in, hit it off, went camping and sh** was great, moved in, kept doing stuff together, eventually made out with her, eventually got wrapped up into what feels like a relationship even though we've DTR'd and never settled on a monogamous status, but she's basically stopped dating other dudes and is totally invested in me.
Turns out she's pretty BPD from what I gather, it's a f***ing nightmare sometimes, especially on her period, and there's nowhere to escape since we live with each other and that's sort of what I guess we signed up for deciding to get intimate while living with each other right away. We have great communication, we fight like every other day but then talk about sh**, but it's just like god, someone I have to argue with this much, I don't want to do this forever.
So I've been trying to figure out how to back off without offending, but the backing off becomes offensive, and she gets pissed, mega emotional rollercoaster with this girl. I feel like I have to smooth it out since I live with this girl and I don't want her making the living situation unbearable, I'd really like to stay in this house and move into a just be friends situation. We'll fight and she'll be like, "I'm done, f*** this," and then I'll calm her down and get us both objective about an argument and she'll fall right back in love with me instead of just finding peace in separation.
I could just move out, walk away, but it's a huge pain in the ass trying to find a new place with cool people for one, for two, it's coming up like a week away and I don't want to be a **** and dive out with that little notice, so I feel like I'm signed up for July no matter what, cause I do actually care enough about her not to screw her over and typically strive for a peaceful exit from these things. That said, I don't want to feel like I have to invite her out to every activity I get invited to, cater to all her needs, spend money on her all the time for another whole d*mn month.
Analysis:
1) Don't f**king f**k your roommate you just met, dumb***. Thanks for that if you thought of that contribution, I know. I already knew, but I went for it cause she seemed awesome and on par with a lot of my ideologies. She just ended up being a super unstable person. Still reckless since now I'm in a situation instead of having the option to exit easily.
2) Is it possible to find a peaceable exit from this situation? History with BPD chicks says no. Logic of possibility says possible, but I find the great difficulty in that when I bring us back to a state of appreciation, she enters back into a state of total attraction and clinginess.
3) Girls are jealous and vindictive. Girls think they're the hottest commodity and want to boast that in front of guys they've denied. I anticipate an annoying amount of male interests populating the home and unwarranted displays of misplaced affection directed in a vial way at me once I say, "Let's just be friends." Seems like I'll have to move out, so really, the end question is at what point do I stop compromising my personal time and pursuit of other women and allow for a potentially aggravating living situation? That's not to say that the ideal of we can smile and not try to piss each other off because there's still some level of attraction between us and be happy for each other's healthier romantic interests can't happen, but mm, they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Idk, it's f***ed. Lol. Any decent advice? Feel free to criticize, though I've already processed enough criticism from myself to not really feel like you'll enlighten me any further about making a mostly horny decision.
I haven't been on here in a while, but I felt like it'd be nice to get some outsider perspective since all my few dude friends really lend me is like, "Yea, that sucks for you!!!"
Anyway, so the story:
Was looking for a new place to live, found a room in this house with who I thought was an awesome down-to-earth hippy chick, ended up hanging out with her a ton before I moved in, hit it off, went camping and sh** was great, moved in, kept doing stuff together, eventually made out with her, eventually got wrapped up into what feels like a relationship even though we've DTR'd and never settled on a monogamous status, but she's basically stopped dating other dudes and is totally invested in me.
Turns out she's pretty BPD from what I gather, it's a f***ing nightmare sometimes, especially on her period, and there's nowhere to escape since we live with each other and that's sort of what I guess we signed up for deciding to get intimate while living with each other right away. We have great communication, we fight like every other day but then talk about sh**, but it's just like god, someone I have to argue with this much, I don't want to do this forever.
So I've been trying to figure out how to back off without offending, but the backing off becomes offensive, and she gets pissed, mega emotional rollercoaster with this girl. I feel like I have to smooth it out since I live with this girl and I don't want her making the living situation unbearable, I'd really like to stay in this house and move into a just be friends situation. We'll fight and she'll be like, "I'm done, f*** this," and then I'll calm her down and get us both objective about an argument and she'll fall right back in love with me instead of just finding peace in separation.
I could just move out, walk away, but it's a huge pain in the ass trying to find a new place with cool people for one, for two, it's coming up like a week away and I don't want to be a **** and dive out with that little notice, so I feel like I'm signed up for July no matter what, cause I do actually care enough about her not to screw her over and typically strive for a peaceful exit from these things. That said, I don't want to feel like I have to invite her out to every activity I get invited to, cater to all her needs, spend money on her all the time for another whole d*mn month.
Analysis:
1) Don't f**king f**k your roommate you just met, dumb***. Thanks for that if you thought of that contribution, I know. I already knew, but I went for it cause she seemed awesome and on par with a lot of my ideologies. She just ended up being a super unstable person. Still reckless since now I'm in a situation instead of having the option to exit easily.
2) Is it possible to find a peaceable exit from this situation? History with BPD chicks says no. Logic of possibility says possible, but I find the great difficulty in that when I bring us back to a state of appreciation, she enters back into a state of total attraction and clinginess.
3) Girls are jealous and vindictive. Girls think they're the hottest commodity and want to boast that in front of guys they've denied. I anticipate an annoying amount of male interests populating the home and unwarranted displays of misplaced affection directed in a vial way at me once I say, "Let's just be friends." Seems like I'll have to move out, so really, the end question is at what point do I stop compromising my personal time and pursuit of other women and allow for a potentially aggravating living situation? That's not to say that the ideal of we can smile and not try to piss each other off because there's still some level of attraction between us and be happy for each other's healthier romantic interests can't happen, but mm, they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Idk, it's f***ed. Lol. Any decent advice? Feel free to criticize, though I've already processed enough criticism from myself to not really feel like you'll enlighten me any further about making a mostly horny decision.
