A serious question for all you guys doing "cold approach journals"

[skip2mylou781]

I read it, I read it all......from Brak, to Fallen, to whoever else posts their cold approaches.

And I am wondering TWO questions for all of you cold approach lovers.

1)Do you ever EVER actually get laid or even get any kind of azz from all these girls you spend so much time approaching?

and

2)Do you all approach because you feel like you NEED to (aka to overcome approach anxiety), or do you approach because you WANT to??

the key difference between NEED and WANT is VITAL

NEED = u come off unnatural and insincere, and that will repel girls, even if they find you good looking. You also can come off creepy.

WANT = you come off very sincere, very real, and very natural - this leads to lots more success than you can imagine.

So, what are the answers???

 

[lougv22]

here is my reply, i do have a "cold approach" journal although it is not posted online.

the point of doing a cold approach is not to get laid or get azz, the point is to improve your dating skills. Like Mystery said, it is not the getting laid or any particular girl that matters, the game itself should be its own reward. When you get good enough results will come naturally. If you approach a girl with the mentality 'i must get her number' or 'i must get her to have sex with me' then you will put too much pressure on your self and because of that your performance will suffer.

I don't know about other guys, but I do cold approaches both because I want to and because I need to. At first it's more because you need to, and yes, it does come off a bit unnatural, but you know what, it doesn't matter if it came off unnatural or not. What matters is that you overcame your fear and confronted it head on, you shouldn't care if the girl thought you were creepy. None of that matters, what matters is that with each approach you improve your skills and then the next approach will be less unnatural.

In fact, after you do enough approaches it will become natural to you, this is the process that Mystery calls 'internalization". So if it is natural to you, it will feel natural to the girl also. When you come to the point when you approach a girl and starting talking to her without thinking about it, then you will know you have this stuff internalized.

And lastly, I don't know about other guys but here is what I have found out. If I see a girl that I like and I want to approach her but I don't because of my fear, then afterwards I beat my self up for it and I feel like less of a man. But if I do approach her and talk to her, even if it is something simple like 'Hi, what's your name?' afterwards I feel good about myself and I feel like more of a man. Do you see where I am going with this? ..If not approaching a girl makes you feel bad and approaching her makes you feel good, then you start to WANT to approach them rather then NEEDING to approach them, because naturally you want to feel good.

 

[~attrACTION~]

^ good post skip2mylou.

I was actually going to make a thread about this myself, because I'm also wondering.

I don't have a journal, but Cod3r, greenlake, and myself were attempting to do bunch of approaches per week. I did a couple and my number closing rate was 100% so far on 2 of my approaches.

I think it was helpful for Cod3r to start the thread because I should be more active in the game. I ONLY approach if I get eye contact or some sort of IOI from the girl. So, to answer your question, I do it out of WANT...usually it's pretty natural conversation, and it just flows.

To be honest, I think making a conscious effort to approach when a girl digs me is good because it keeps me ready and prepared. It's good to be sharp and on my game.

Now, honestly, I didn't call the girls who I got numbers from. This is somewhat of a problem because I do want to go out on dates, but I have trouble with phone calls. Do you have any tips or links to articles? Because I can get phone numbers no problem and girls like me, but I choke when it comes to calling.

My other problem is doing kino on the approach. The only thing I do is a handshake, which is pretty normal. Sometimes the girl will kino me lightly on the arm, but I have trouble reciprocating. I think if I could get more comfortable with touching on the first meeting, I would be a lot more successful in terms of converting approaches into lays. Because once the touching gets mutual, I have no problem owning the chick, seriously.

So...basically, phone calls and kino are my roadblocks at the moment.

edit: By the way, when alcohol is involved, I have NO problems with kino. But at the moment, I'm having some problems with my liver, and I can't drink for a couple of months, so that means no more clubbing for a while.

 

[~attrACTION~]

Yep. I've gotten most of my lays off cold approaches in real life. One of them was even while I was in my car at a red light! 5 second #close ha.

I don't approach to overcome my approach anxiety. ..But that's because I don't have any. I approach because I enjoy it.

GGTW

Hey godsgifttowomen, do you have a link to your approach journal or approaches?

Thanks.

 

[DarkLight]

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GodsGift..... your sig is fvckin hilarious!
(go figure, its from Shezz)

 

[Microphone Fiend]

1. Yes, look @ Slickster in mature man section, or jjwhite7 or various other cold approach journals.
2. In the beginning it is a 'need' but after you get over the approach anxiety it is a 'want'. Without starting the journal or approaching on the regular, you cant really get to the stage where you LIKE to approach. Also the journals always look for feedback so they can get input and insight on what they are doing wrong.

Not a bad post skip2mylou....im impressed, lol.

 

[Brak86]

I read it, I read it all......from Brak, to Fallen, to whoever else posts their cold approaches.

And I am wondering TWO questions for all of you cold approach lovers.

1)Do you ever EVER actually get laid or even get any kind of azz from all these girls you spend so much time approaching?

and

2)Do you all approach because you feel like you NEED to (aka to overcome approach anxiety), or do you approach because you WANT to??

the key difference between NEED and WANT is VITAL

NEED = u come off unnatural and insincere, and that will repel girls, even if they find you good looking. You also can come off creepy.

WANT = you come off very sincere, very real, and very natural - this leads to lots more success than you can imagine.

So, what are the answers???

I definately WANTto. I know that I desire to get good at this. I guess you could say I NEED to also because I have a perfectionist mentality. I have not gotten laid yet, but you have to be patient with this stuff. It's not like I've been rejected, I've just been limiting myself (not in a bad way, I'm just new at this). As you have read in my journal, I've JUST started asking for numbers, so obviously I havent gotten laid doing cold approaches, but it is helping me greatly improve my social skills, my playful/teasing personality, my boldness, and the ability to detect IOIs. I hope that helps, ask me anything else if you need to.

P.S. I've said this here before, but I eventually want to get so good that I can help new guys at this, so I think that somewhat shows that I WANT this.

 

[skip2mylou781]

its definitely good to see guys do approach journals....i mean keeping track of ur game is a GREAT thing to do (i keep an excel spreadsheet of all the girls i ****, no joke), its just it really seems like u guys are relying on cold approaches to get u laid, when the reality is, its VERY HARD to get laid from a cold approach, and its more for practice on how to talk to women.......and getting laid is easier to achieve through

a)parties
b)clubs
c)mutual friends
d)internet
e)bars

seems like these cold approaches basically lead to nothing except some conversation....am i correct?

 

[Brak86]

its definitely good to see guys do approach journals....i mean keeping track of ur game is a GREAT thing to do (i keep an excel spreadsheet of all the girls i ****, no joke), its just it really seems like u guys are relying on cold approaches to get u laid, when the reality is, its VERY HARD to get laid from a cold approach, and its more for practice on how to talk to women.......and getting laid is easier to achieve through

a)parties
b)clubs
c)mutual friends
d)internet
e)bars

seems like these cold approaches basically lead to nothing except some conversation....am i correct?

yes...you are correct in that it is very hard to get laid doing cold approaches, but I feel that if i can get laid after doing a cold approach, then i can get laid anywhere. I don't want to limit myself, and I feel that as long as I keep practicing, I can become very successful at even cold approaches. Also, the places youy mentioned are all night game spots. I want to be an all-around PUA. Plus, I've always been going to parties, but I havent really been getting far. Day gaming helps my confidence SO MUCH and seems to be better for me (at least for now) in bettering and keeping track of my success.

Also dude, I havent truly TRIED getting laid on cold approaches yet. I have yet to set up and go on a date yet. It's not that so far it's been harder, I just havent done it yet.

let me also add that my college is medium sized. But i DO see a lot of the same girls every day. Being a beginner, I dont want to **** up my chances and my reputation already. I feel that going into the city I can approach anyone and if i saw them even a week later they probably wouldnt remember me. Day gaming in the city is my crash course!

 

[Zero Hero]

Cold approaches are a new thing for most people so its tough to transition to getting laid. Ideally, CAs should lead to #s, dates, and ultimately getting laid so its a longer process. I haven't really seen anyone really accomplish this with a journal, but it definitely can be done. I may start trying this soon.

 

[Brak86]

Cold approaches are a new thing for most people so its tough to transition to getting laid. Ideally, CAs should lead to #s, dates, and ultimately getting laid so its a longer process. I haven't really seen anyone really accomplish this with a journal, but it definitely can be done. I may start trying this soon.

Yep...it DEFINATELY without a doubt can be done. It is harder, and also the reason why you all dont see it done on here is because you need to be persistent with it...most people are not.