A nice guy that gets the babes?

[Alex DeLarge]

So lately a friend and I have been going out and seeing chicks together. This dude acts very feminine. He walks it and talks it. He'll do all sorts of favors for girls yet he still attracts them haha. He is also very self conscious and will be an emotional tampon to the girls he talks to at times. (talking about his ex, family life, and all sorts of things.)

He's a pretty good looking guy so he has that going for him. But other than that, I'm just dumbfounded. He is the perfect poster guy for a beta nice guy, yet he's still pulling the babes!

I'm not here to try and figure out some pseudo psychological mumbo jumbo to this, I just figured I would share it with ya'll and see what you think. Or maybe you have experienced this too? Discuss!

 

[Mike32ct]

Women can forgive nice guy or even gay mannerisms if the guy is really good looking.

Looks and/or height can trump a lot of things.

Finally, there are no 100 percent rules in this game. We look at what typically works with women, but there are always exceptions.

 

[Scars]

Okay, so he has a bunch of female orbiters, but how many of them is he actually fvcking?

 

[sexysuave]

I have seen this before also. However, the ones that I have seen couldn't keep a relationship for too long, but they sure did have a lot of babes wanting them. It seems like if a guy is really good looking and is at least somewhat outgoing even if it's kinda feminine and emotional and talking about things you wouldnt' think are "DJ stuff" he still will attract a lot of girls. Hell, a lot of times I heard girls say "that guy is so hot!" So really, as much as people on this forum might try to deny it, the looks go a LONG way and some of these "nice" guys that are extremely good looking, really it's not gonna matter if they're a little feminine, they will still get girls based on their looks.

Also, it's weird, but THEY can get away with it, while the more average looking guys usually can't. A girl will tell her friends "I met this guy, and he is this and that, and oh my god, he is SOO hot!!" "He said these nice things to me and did this and did that" and her friends are like "ohhhhh that's soooo nice of him, he is soo cute!!!" Well, you can take those SAME girls, and put in an average looking guy or not so good looking guy, and replay the SAME situation and have him say the SAME things, and the result will be totally different. Those SAME girls would be like "eww, that's kinda creepy, he is coming on too strong, what a weirdo, bla bla bla bla". It matters BIG time in situations like this, and basically, if a guy is good looking, that's plenty enough for a lot of girls nowadays (sorry to say). Now like I said, I have also seen these guys that I know struggle to keep some really long term relationships, and I know of few circumstances where hearing them tell me what happened, I just knew they just went way to AFC on the girl.. so long term they do have to kinda man up a bit to keep their relationship, but otherwise, short term, they can get girls without hardly trying.. it is what it is.. I have personally always had to be the one to pursue and take charge and go talking to girls, and I have had tons and tons more girls than my really extremely good looking friends, but with them it just came with no effort, lol, the chicks would start talking to them first (I mean I've had a few girls start talking to me first also here and there, but nothing of that extent)

So yeah, being a really good looking guy is a HUGE advantage, nice or not, don't let anyone tell you different

 

[joverby]

I have to regretably say, that type of guy you're depicting is......me.

I am a pretty good looking dude(no self homo). Have gotten girls plenty of times while not even trying, like just doing my own thing the whole night not even trying to game on a chick and then end up fvcking her at the end of the night.

I havent had many LTR's but my 2 most serious did start going south. Stemming from me acting/being AFC(infemminate). My current one did a 180 though, as I found this forum and started to "man up." Thanks guys.

 

[mahoney]

nice guy, emotional sponge, shows his feelings, feminine

ive seen plenty guys who are all the above get girls the whole time....and you know why


because they're not needy, they don't pressurize, they don't make everything incredibly serious, their niceness comes with no strings attached, something happens with a girl they don't bombard with texts and try suck the life out of it, and most importantly of all they're fun!

just because a dude is nice or 'thoughtful' doesnt make them boring, creepy, intense or needy!

 

[crazyboy]

The truth is the better looking a man you are. The more you can get away with being a nice guy. That all there is to it. The reason this work for the better looking man is because the woman is already attracted to them. So they can really do no wrong.

But in your case some of those feminem dudes just have alot female orbiters and not in the good way. They are more like emotional tampons in which these babes hang around for. These guys seem to have alot women but in reality there just friends of them. They usually are the worst ****blockers as well. A more masculine good looking guy would easly pull women away from this dude.

Hell i was at club these dude were talking to these girls and i was like **** it. I grab her arm, pull her toward me, started talking got her number.

 

[thedude4242]

some of the biggest gym rat steroid using pretty boys get called tools by women all the time.

all this stuff contradicts itself. you ethier do too much or not enough.

why approach and talk for a few minutes and close with a number. that is the same stuff everyone other guy is doing and getting no where. make a little different style.

 

[MurdocIsGod]

That used to be me in my first year of high school. I was extremely confident and talkative, so that was of course a strong selling point... But my "approach" consisted of constant compliments but they became interested 99.9% of the time.

Like I met this one girl from my school on MSN, I asked her what she looks like, she was like "blonde hair, blue eyes" etc, so I said "you sound really pretty " or something, and I'd just keep throwing compliment after compliment at her.

With other girls too, would tell them they're really pretty, special, etc. Always worked for me... Then I got a reputation as being a player... This was actually before I came to this site...

Then I read on pickup sites to be ****y funny etc and I haven't done that since... Though with that approach I picked up basically every girl in my year.

 

[Igetit!]

Okay, so he has a bunch of female orbiters, but how many of them is he actually fvcking?

Exactly.......+1 rep.

 

[zekko]

Some of the guys that I see women oohing and aahing over the most are gay. The girls hug them, cuddle them, give out I love yous, tell them how hot they look, then when they're gone say "Oh, he's sooo good looking".
Not all gay guys, but a select few.

A good part of this is they are nonthreatening and seen as fellow girlfriends in a way. So they're not fvcking the girls. They probably could, but aren't interested. Acting feminine makes the girls able to relate to them. Maybe it's a similar thing with the guy the original poster is talking about.

 

[LinkinParkROX]

Hahaha this guy's body says "Hey, I'm a sexual being, I'm a MAN!" while his behaviors and everything else says "I'm a homo, stay away!". Looks create initial interest, personality is what keeps chicks. Odds are, chicks would use him as their citizen dildo and discard him like one. All hope for a long term relationship with this gent is lost. That is, until he grows a pair.

 

[thedude4242]

you guys make it look like if you are good looking you can and do whatever you want and a women is forgiving. that is far from the truth.

 

[BettorOffSingle]

So lately a friend and I have been going out and seeing chicks together. This dude acts very feminine. He walks it and talks it. He'll do all sorts of favors for girls yet he still attracts them haha. He is also very self conscious and will be an emotional tampon to the girls he talks to at times. (talking about his ex, family life, and all sorts of things.)

He's a pretty good looking guy so he has that going for him. But other than that, I'm just dumbfounded. He is the perfect poster guy for a beta nice guy, yet he's still pulling the babes!

I'm not here to try and figure out some pseudo psychological mumbo jumbo to this, I just figured I would share it with ya'll and see what you think. Or maybe you have experienced this too? Discuss!

He gets women becuase he GETS women.

Get it?

Women LIKE men who do favors for them, who listen to their problems, who enjoy conversation, who aren't ruled by sports and other stupid male-dominated pursuits, etc. He's also not trying to SELL you some b/s alpha, state-pumping garbage. BETAs actually do better than Alphas once they get a game of their own.

His stuff "fails" as often as the PUA stuff fails, but he sticks to his gameplan. I bet he's also just fine with LJBF, like the best PUA I ever met who would default to LJBF with any new women.

What this guy does NOT do is waste time with OTHER MEN. Do a search for the "clueless or gay rule" if you want to find more of my opinions on this on the internet. Basically, while a group of wannabe-PUAs are hanging with each other, he's mopping up the one chick each of them could have had if they hadn't been more into MEN than WOMEN. Men often turn to each other for socializing because they get sick of the difficulty in finding attractive women with whom to hang out, so they wind up calling each other in a classic clusterfock.

 

[sambwoy]

you guys make it look like if you are good looking you can and do whatever you want and a women is forgiving. that is far from the truth.

I dunno. It depends where you live.

Regarding 'nice' guys, I was brought up mature way early on into my youth and I'd be honest it hasn't always worked in my favour. Unfortunately the world isn't always nice.

I have a tough time living in the UK all my life and I have been miserable to the point of suicide, or just feeling so empty, with not much of a track record in dating. Whether its me or the girls here, or both. They look through me like I don't exist.

If I had the courage I'd hit on any girl that took my interest and often came out with poor results. Perhaps 'leagues' aren't just made up by the films, TV etc. I am starting to think the stereotyping is somehow grounded in reality. I don't think it is a case of shortage or lack of attractive women- the problem is that I have been to trendy fashionable places and there are loads of them, its just they aren't interested.

 

[BettorOffSingle]

I dunno. It depends where you live.

Regarding 'nice' guys, I was brought up mature way early on into my youth and I'd be honest it hasn't always worked in my favour. Unfortunately the world isn't always nice.

I have a tough time living in the UK all my life and I have been miserable to the point of suicide, or just feeling so empty, with not much of a track record in dating. Whether its me or the girls here, or both. They look through me like I don't exist.

If I had the courage I'd hit on any girl that took my interest and often came out with poor results. Perhaps 'leagues' aren't just made up by the films, TV etc. I am starting to think the stereotyping is somehow grounded in reality. I don't think it is a case of shortage or lack of attractive women- the problem is that I have been to trendy fashionable places and there are loads of them, its just they aren't interested.

Are you short? Have some other "Level I" obstacle that would benefit from you going for LJBF with a super-elite first? Perhaps it's sexual inexperience, high standards, or a combination of all of the above.

I got lucky in that I crashed and burned so horribly in NYC's "trendy" bars by age sixteen that I had sworn off them as serious venues. This caused my DAY GAME to skyrocket, and that flowed out of just talking to attractive girls normally, but avoiding conversation with the uglies!

I cannot stress enough the importance of learning how to relate in "Level II" (spiritual/friendship) in laying a proper foundation for becoming a world-class PUA. Even the hottest of the hot women will not object to FRIENDSHIP if you approach her correctly (or let her approach you in time of need), at which point you have a PIVOT at the least, a good scoring chance at best, and a huge FREE BOOTCAMP for everything in between.

A super-hottie who is your FRIEND isn't going to want you to do badly with women becuase a) you'll hit on her; and b) you'll disprove their LIE that the best man wins, so they rig the game in your favor, as long as you don't expect them to take one for the team.

 

[Ollos]

A friend and I play in the same band- I sing, he plays the bass guitar. He's better looking than me. He get's the girls easily (mostly for quickies) compared to me. Ironically, our music director (also the band leader/owner), has the body of a boy- he's really short and tiny, doesn't quite pass for a handsome dude but has one of the hottest (tall and curvy with a smooth sweet symmetrical face) women I've ever met. And she happens to be the band manager. Y'all read in-between the lines what's happening here...
Lesson? Get your life together, really do it! And you'll be rewarded with both short term quickies and LTRs. I took these notes silently and the theory is working for me.

 

[Johnny_Kage]

He gets women becuase he GETS women.

Get it?

Women LIKE men who do favors for them, who listen to their problems, who enjoy conversation, who aren't ruled by sports and other stupid male-dominated pursuits, etc. He's also not trying to SELL you some b/s alpha, state-pumping garbage. BETAs actually do better than Alphas once they get a game of their own.

His stuff "fails" as often as the PUA stuff fails, but he sticks to his gameplan. I bet he's also just fine with LJBF, like the best PUA I ever met who would default to LJBF with any new women.

What this guy does NOT do is waste time with OTHER MEN. Do a search for the "clueless or gay rule" if you want to find more of my opinions on this on the internet. Basically, while a group of wannabe-PUAs are hanging with each other, he's mopping up the one chick each of them could have had if they hadn't been more into MEN than WOMEN. Men often turn to each other for socializing because they get sick of the difficulty in finding attractive women with whom to hang out, so they wind up calling each other in a classic clusterfock.

I was about to comment on this post, but this is perfect.

Also, about the "Level I" obstacles: any of them could be conquered.

I'm short (5'6), but right now, I'm dating 3 girls that are my height or taller. I routinely hook up with girls off all heights.

Looks, height, money, anything else you could think of....are problems of your own making. They don't actually matter. The fact that you think they do is what makes it a problem.

 

[thevilittletroll]

he does get inital attraction because he is good looking. but thats not enough to keep the girl. he must maintain the attraction and pass congruence tests (s.hit tests). if he is getting laid my guess is that his nice guy conversations, are probably very "emotional" and he skips right into comfort stage. its actually quite textbook. if he's not getting laid he's not trying hard enough, and not escalating, therefore getting himeself put into the friend zone.

 

[DonGorgon]

when females find you attractive it over rides most rules and complexities.. so the less attractive they find you the more you need this don juan game tactics to get layed..