The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[Roober]

I'm glad I found this site. I am comforted in knowing that I am not experiencing this situation alone. I value everyone's comments. I really feel like to urge to ask her to meetup. someone please give me some opinions.

I posted this a couple pages back. I think it is a great DJ perspective. Your ex was a season and willing to let you go, so let her...

Good video! F**k em!

I really like the tree analogy, may have to keep that in my repertoire

To be honest, I think anyone that ends up at SoSuave came for one of two reasons...
1. To get better with women
2. Because they got dumped and were looking for answers

I am willing to bet the majority come from number 2. These women came into our lives to lead us here, to lead us to be better men, to lead us to grab control of our lives. They will regret what they gave up even more when they see how we turned out...

 

[exhausted]

I posted this a couple pages back. I think it is a great DJ perspective. Your ex was a season and willing to let you go, so let her...



To be honest, I think anyone that ends up at SoSuave came for one of two reasons...
1. To get better with women
2. Because they got dumped and were looking for answers

I am willing to bet the majority come from number 2. These women came into our lives to lead us here, to lead us to be better men, to lead us to grab control of our lives. They will regret what they gave up even more when they see how we turned out...

Get better with assessing and evaluating women.
Ive been doing the dumping but i have a fault at keeping the wrong women around too long.
Trying to be better for sure.

 

[Roober]

Get better with assessing and evaluating women.
Ive been doing the dumping but i have a fault at keeping the wrong women around too long.
Trying to be better for sure.

Lots of men keep women around too long. It is easy and provides a constant source of pvssy. Spinning plates takes a bit more work than an LTR. The problem is most men let these short term women stick around for long term relationships because they get mesmerized by the poonani... not because it is special, but because it is there...

 

[Carpathian]

Lots of men keep women around too long. It is easy and provides a constant source of pvssy. Spinning plates takes a bit more work than an LTR. The problem is most men let these short term women stick around for long term relationships because they get mesmerized by the poonani... not because it is special, but because it is there...

Ain't that the truth.

 

[exhausted]

Lots of men keep women around too long. It is easy and provides a constant source of pvssy. Spinning plates takes a bit more work than an LTR. The problem is most men let these short term women stick around for long term relationships because they get mesmerized by the poonani... not because it is special, but because it is there...

Usually true.
I had no problem getting *****.
Just have run into the pointin my life i enjoy companionship and ***** with the same girl.
In this day and age quality people are scarce. I feel i takes a year at least to get to know someone and then their instabilities come out. At that point u vet them and see if they are too worth it or not and if they are u hope to see them grow and improve.
Today's spoiled brat women dont do either.
I find myself more disappointed and let down by life than the girl specifically, if that makes sense.
Like looking up to God and asking ,"really, what am i suppose to do with this ****storm of women to chose from"?

 

[finality]

The ex sent 2 random texts to me last night while I was plowing my new girl. Its almost magical how they always reach out when you are with another women. Like something energetically, quantum physics, vibration, we are all connected type of shyt goes on where they just know that you are slipping away.

Staying NC, of course.

 

[Mick88]

Day 100
I got involved with a co worker last summer. Was seeing her for a month. It was pretty full on. 40 hours per week together plus me staying in her's 3-4 nights per week.
Thats a few months of dating crammed into a month. She literally went cold over night and ended it.
I still saw her in work every day for a month after that, she was cold and her hamplanet crew were absolute counts towards me, I know she was pulling the strings behind them.
I found a new job and got out of there. I havent attempted to contact her and won't, I still have her number though.
The thing is, when I think about disposing of the number, I feel anxious. She treated me like a disposable object and cut me loose like it was nothing, but a part of me misses her. This annoys me. If I look at it without emotion, I can see she was sooooo wrong for me, but I still ruminate about the whole situation.
She's probably went through another few guys since me. This sh1t has my head tied up and I can't stop dwelling on it.
I know I sound like a ***** but I can't shake it. This chick is a 6 according to my friends who have a ln objective view point, and I can see that. But I hate that I can't just let go of a poisonous person like they did to me.

 

[exhausted]

The ex sent 2 random texts to me last night while I was plowing my new girl. Its almost magical how they always reach out when you are with another women. Like something energetically, quantum physics, vibration, we are all connected type of shyt goes on where they just know that you are slipping away.

Staying NC, of course.

What did she text u and how long have u been nc?

 

[xstang77]

The ex sent 2 random texts to me last night while I was plowing my new girl. Its almost magical how they always reach out when you are with another women. Like something energetically, quantum physics, vibration, we are all connected type of shyt goes on where they just know that you are slipping away.

Staying NC, of course.

Funny I went through the same thing with my most recent ex, had just got done banging her for the first time and she was cleaning up and sure enough my bpd ex sends an "I miss you" after 3 months. Makes you feel like a king, good for you man I hope to be in that position again.

 

[finality]

What did she text u and how long have u been nc?

It's been 9 days of NC and her texts were literally ransom gibberish like its cold outside.

I know BPD gets through out a lot on this forum but my ex is legit. I won't mention all the proof out of respect but take my word for it.

Anyways, I know that her reaching out has nothing to do to me. It's not because I'm the best looking, banged her the best, or took top spot on her high score. It's 100% about her. She is sick and lonely and will always been alone despite the fact that is hot and will always have a guy in her life.

She does not want me to be happy and is only reaching out to serve her own intresests.

It took me close to 1 year to come to this realization... I mean logically I knew this but 1 year to really accept this as reality and there is no happy ending..she can't be saved.

She is drug and im an addict. Therefor my only recourse is NC for life. Took me a long time to accept this but no women is worth my health and sanity.

 

[exhausted]

It's been 9 days of NC and her texts were literally ransom gibberish like its cold outside.

I know BPD gets through out a lot on this forum but my ex is legit. I won't mention all the proof out of respect but take my word for it.

Anyways, I know that her reaching out has nothing to do to me. It's not because I'm the best looking, banged her the best, or took top spot on her high score. It's 100% about her. She is sick and lonely and will always been alone despite the fact that is hot and will always have a guy in her life.

She does not want me to be happy and is only reaching out to serve her own intresests.

It took me close to 1 year to come to this realization... I mean logically I knew this but 1 year to really accept this as reality and there is no happy ending..she can't be saved.

She is drug and im an addict. Therefor my only recourse is NC for life. Took me a long time to accept this but no women is worth my health and sanity.

Yep.
My ex wife is bpd. Dated a year and engaged a year and married 10 months separated and divorced. She had me so f'd up my psychologist diagnosed her thro my sessions and she even contacted her and had a session w her. That was ten years ago. I stayed single for 7 years tho had some str and randoms.
Some how by the grace of the devil i just got a way from a bipolar gf of almost 3 years.
Clinically diagnosed bipolar and given meds which she did not take.
Difference is a bpd does not have a heart at all, a bipolar does have a heart, half the time tho they are emotionally unstable, its fukn rough.

I'm terrified of what i run into next....


Good for u for staying clear of her.

 

[Carpathian]

Day 100
I got involved with a co worker last summer. Was seeing her for a month. It was pretty full on. 40 hours per week together plus me staying in her's 3-4 nights per week.
Thats a few months of dating crammed into a month. She literally went cold over night and ended it.
I still saw her in work every day for a month after that, she was cold and her hamplanet crew were absolute counts towards me, I know she was pulling the strings behind them.
I found a new job and got out of there. I havent attempted to contact her and won't, I still have her number though.
The thing is, when I think about disposing of the number, I feel anxious. She treated me like a disposable object and cut me loose like it was nothing, but a part of me misses her. This annoys me. If I look at it without emotion, I can see she was sooooo wrong for me, but I still ruminate about the whole situation.
She's probably went through another few guys since me. This sh1t has my head tied up and I can't stop dwelling on it.
I know I sound like a ***** but I can't shake it. This chick is a 6 according to my friends who have a ln objective view point, and I can see that. But I hate that I can't just let go of a poisonous person like they did to me.

Never get involved with a woman from work. Ever. That is a DJ bible top rule and downright common sense. Never mix the church and state as we say.

 

[Carpathian]

It's been 9 days of NC and her texts were literally ransom gibberish like its cold outside.

I know BPD gets through out a lot on this forum but my ex is legit. I won't mention all the proof out of respect but take my word for it.

Anyways, I know that her reaching out has nothing to do to me. It's not because I'm the best looking, banged her the best, or took top spot on her high score. It's 100% about her. She is sick and lonely and will always been alone despite the fact that is hot and will always have a guy in her life.

She does not want me to be happy and is only reaching out to serve her own intresests.

It took me close to 1 year to come to this realization... I mean logically I knew this but 1 year to really accept this as reality and there is no happy ending..she can't be saved.

She is drug and im an addict. Therefor my only recourse is NC for life. Took me a long time to accept this but no women is worth my health and sanity.

Well done dude.
I likewise was with a borderline woman. They are fvkked-up - a sinking ship that can take you down with them. You and me got away lightly. Yes indeed. Not that we knew it at the time but we were miraculously flung-off that sinking ship rather than being chained to the oars, going down with it in terror. Yes we were lost at sea for a while, floating around wondering why we were dumped. But we endured and we prevailed in the end. She did us the biggest favor she could ever have done; not that she knows that consciously. Some guys get married and have kids with these women and have to put up with a whole heap of sh1t for years and decades. For life even in some cultures. A moody, eggshell, no sex relationship. Really guys - the world is our oyster now that we are out of that sh1t. We can find a good woman who loves us.

 

[exhausted]

Well done dude.
I likewise was with a borderline woman. They are fvkked-up - a sinking ship that can take you down with them. You and me got away lightly. Yes indeed. Not that we knew it at the time but we were miraculously flung-off that sinking ship rather than being chained to the oars, going down with it in terror. Yes we were lost at sea for a while, floating around wondering why we were dumped. But we endured and we prevailed in the end. She did us the biggest favor she could ever have done; not that she knows that consciously. Some guys get married and have kids with these women and have to put up with a whole heap of sh1t for years and decades. For life even in some cultures. A moody, eggshell, no sex relationship. Really guys - the world is our oyster now that we are out of that sh1t. We can find a good woman who loves us.

Moody, eggshells, no sex.

U got that right.

 

[Roober]

Gah! It has been two months and been feeling good this last week. I still think about her daily, which sucks, but more like little things, not longingly missing her... Trying to clean up some old photos and move some files around on my computer (it's a bit of an OCD thing to keep my files organized). Ran accross a couple pictures of us, and I get the feels again. Hard to see the great times we had together and think of what it could have turned into.

Then I have to remember she reciprocated "showing" how much she cared little, if at all. She was a typical single mommy "princess" who felt like the world owed her something, and that her kid was better than my boys. As heavily stated in "the rational male", she used the power of the poonani to get me hooked... hard... and thinking back, the sex wasn't even that great, she couldn't ride a d*ck worth a damn, I was always on top doing all the work... wow, having a moment... kind of summarizes our relationship. I did everything... sigh... oh well...

 

[exhausted]

Gah! It has been two months and been feeling good this last week. I still think about her daily, which sucks, but more like little things, not longingly missing her... Trying to clean up some old photos and move some files around on my computer (it's a bit of an OCD thing to keep my files organized). Ran accross a couple pictures of us, and I get the feels again. Hard to see the great times we had together and think of what it could have turned into.

Then I have to remember she reciprocated "showing" how much she cared little, if at all. She was a typical single mommy "princess" who felt like the world owed her something, and that her kid was better than my boys. As heavily stated in "the rational male", she used the power of the poonani to get me hooked... hard... and thinking back, the sex wasn't even that great, she couldn't ride a d*ck worth a damn, I was always on top doing all the work... wow, having a moment... kind of summarizes our relationship. I did everything... sigh... oh well...

U are lucky to be out. As i am.
I also had a single mommy who had 50- 50 custody , when she had her kid i was involved like a step dad doing everything, however when she didnt have the kid she wasnt cooking for me or even around much, always go home to nap or eat what her mom made for dinner, she lived w her parents.
To top it off she is bipolar, drop of a hat could be mean as shiiit, and i mean MEAN...add into that flipping out over nothing.
U dont need a woman around not treating ur kids right, they will feel uneasy inside and dont need that.

 

[exhausted]

Exactly how I feel about it. It's not losing the girl at a certain point, it's despairing over the future .

Yep.
Well i am 38, raised a kid by myself and just wasted 3 years on a girl.

I have the despair and disappointment of missing out in this life on having a marriage, a family, a partner.

Most people dont know the pain in putting up a Christmas tree with just ur kid, sitting at sporting events by yourself, school plays and activities , church, all as a broken family single parent while being around families. Its a torturous affair. 17 years of it.
So my son will be leaving this summer for college , and it will be a drastic change going from having a kid in the house to not.

 

[Roober]

U are lucky to be out. As i am.
I also had a single mommy who had 50- 50 custody , when she had her kid i was involved like a step dad doing everything, however when she didnt have the kid she wasnt cooking for me or even around much, always go home to nap or eat what her mom made for dinner, she lived w her parents.
To top it off she is bipolar, drop of a hat could be mean as shiiit, and i mean MEAN...add into that flipping out over nothing.
U dont need a woman around not treating ur kids right, they will feel uneasy inside and dont need that.

I am beginning to see now why single mommies tend to stay single. Just read that part in the rational male. These women believe they really are such victims. Looking back to mysituation, I think she "careless" with her birth control to tie down baby daddy. Hell... we had a preggo scare about two months after dating, and she was upset she wasn't preggo because she "loved me so much".

Fortunately, I didn't have to deal with any real psychological issues. Mine was just entitled, lazy, and selfish...

 

[Roober]

!

You are crazy. That's an instant dismissal. It's like fvcking a venis flytrap or something.

I had a woman last summer that didn't want me to use protection. When I asked her "you use birth control?", she said "....no".



Yeah, I don't think so.

My cousin recently has been screwed over in the same way that you nearly were. He got with a woman off of Tinder who already had 2 kids with 2 different fathers. I think she had a "pregnancy scare" really early. 2 months later and she is pregnant for real this time (went to the doctors).

Even the women in my family are saying that the "false alarm" was a test to see if he would stick around, before she did it for real. She has him earmarked as a good provider and wants in to that money.

Have to be prepared to dump a woman over her getting pregnant. No white knight sh*t.

lessons learned for sure, should have been a huge red flag... I have much to learn... fortunately, I had a vesectomy years ago, so I knew she was probably just late on the period. I don't share that info with women. Looking at baby daddy, he would only see her once a month or so, but she got preggo? sucks to be him!

 

[exhausted]

I am beginning to see now why single mommies tend to stay single. Just read that part in the rational male. These women believe they really are such victims. Looking back to mysituation, I think she "careless" with her birth control to tie down baby daddy. Hell... we had a preggo scare about two months after dating, and she was upset she wasn't preggo because she "loved me so much".

Fortunately, I didn't have to deal with any real psychological issues. Mine was just entitled, lazy, and selfish...

I finshed the Rationale Male this week.
Single moms expect all our resources to go to them and their kid. Now i would understand their reasoning if they married us, cooked cleaned did laundry and helped wirh finances, but these single moms as expecting to be treated like princesses as they do barely anything, good fukn god.