Hello Friend,

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Your highest value

LARaiders85

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Generally, a man's highest value is the value at which he offers commitment (or has been in the past, times are changing rapidly). We would assume a guy to attract his most quality woman when he offers commitment, because that is the value we offer. We would expect lower quality for casual sex because women can easily get casual sex from men, but not necessarily commitment from a decent man. I think most of us have seen this play out over time. Being egocentric men, we tend to rate our SMV based on the type of woman we date regularly. I think this is a mistake.

I, for one, have had a lifetime of dating attractive women in 6mo-2yr relationships. I valued myself based on an average of these women. What you realize as you date more, though, is that pairing up is every bit as "right place, right time" as a one night stand. Any guy who is around at a time when she is leaving her current bf or recent ex is going to be good enough. I started to notice that I could date women WAY out of my league just by being in the right place at the right time. Now I knew that this wasn't a measure of my actual value. Like my typical str/short LTR, I could not KEEP these women. These are just placeholder status relationships.

I think your value is what you can keep, not what you can get temporarily. I think your value is the women that throw themselves at you and would do anything to keep you locked down permanently. Your ONS value, the lowest value for most men, is almost closer to your true value than your artificial "good enough to date" or even "good enough as placeholder boyfriend" value. Your value IS women you think are below your value when it comes to a stable, long term relationship.
 
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metalwater

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maybe you're describing outer game vs inner game.

I agree with you that by paying attention to the situation of some/any woman and we have sustained access we can game her unless we have a real handicap either mental or physical.

Your value is without limits. based on how you write your probably a couple steps above what you think. Meaning that the higher value woman matches ok w/ you until you convince them otherwise.

the inner game has to be worked just like the outer game does. inner game is where many of us have scars to work through. the outer game can be copy and past together with lots of practice.
 
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