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you can't force someone to accept you

espanish

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a lot of men think you have to act like a man and be a leader to appear sexy to women. you have to be the decision maker. I agree with that. But I don't agree with this whole idea that you have to be forceful.

"don't say do you want to hang out some time. instead, say let's hang out some time" is something multiple people have told me and I don't listen.
"don't punch your number in her phone. instead, get her phone number"

if a girl's interest is low, it's low. no matter how you ask her if she wants to hang out, her interest is low. if you are forceful and say "let's hang out" she might say yes. but guess what? an hour before she will cancel.

if she says she is not giving her number and asks you for your number, her interest is low. nothing you can do. Some men will even trick a woman in getting her number. They will say "ok I will punch my number in your phone" and then without her permission call themselves to get her number. guess what? her interest didn't change. the first time you text her she will block you.

in fact, I am less forceful to avoid time wasters. I say "do you want to hang out some time?" the high interest ones will say yes. the low interest ones will say no and you don't end up wasting your time on them. it could also be a reverse psychology thing, "do you want to hang out" gives the impression that I am not desperate, I am not forcing you to do anything.
 

BuckledWheel

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a lot of men think you have to act like a man and be a leader to appear sexy to women. you have to be the decision maker. I agree with that. But I don't agree with this whole idea that you have to be forceful.

"don't say do you want to hang out some time. instead, say let's hang out some time" is something multiple people have told me and I don't listen.
"don't punch your number in her phone. instead, get her phone number"

if a girl's interest is low, it's low. no matter how you ask her if she wants to hang out, her interest is low. if you are forceful and say "let's hang out" she might say yes. but guess what? an hour before she will cancel.

if she says she is not giving her number and asks you for your number, her interest is low. nothing you can do. Some men will even trick a woman in getting her number. They will say "ok I will punch my number in your phone" and then without her permission call themselves to get her number. guess what? her interest didn't change. the first time you text her she will block you.

in fact, I am less forceful to avoid time wasters. I say "do you want to hang out some time?" the high interest ones will say yes. the low interest ones will say no and you don't end up wasting your time on them. it could also be a reverse psychology thing, "do you want to hang out" gives the impression that I am not desperate, I am not forcing you to do anything.
Good advice. Never act desperate to a chick it will be a disaster. Limit messages & seem aloof. Never send a double or triple text or messages & stay patient if they haven’t replied. Give it a few days & say hi. If you don’t get a response, move on..!
 

typical

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I find using words that paint a picture of things happening in your life and they can come along for the ride makes it far easier to weed out the low interest women and at the same time increase the interest level, while also not putting any pressure on them to say "Yes" and "Commit" to any "Plans" the best way to increase said notch count.

I'm a member of a sailing club and have access to a few "Nice" yachts that we use for sailing or trips around the country (weather permitting). I also have a small group of "acquaintances" that like going out and having fun on the weekends like off-road mudding and hunting/fishing ..... in a semi luxurious way (I've built a lifestyle that is semi comfortable I guess).

So my go to lines are normally along the line with "Hey we've got a sailing rum race regatta/Hunting trip/fishing trip/sailing to (insert Island name) coming up this weekend and there's a few spots left for new people, you can tag along kiddo/missy/little lady"

Works wonders and if it doesn't well there's normally plenty of people going to these events to meet new people and have fun.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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a lot of men think you have to act like a man and be a leader to appear sexy to women. you have to be the decision maker. I agree with that. But I don't agree with this whole idea that you have to be forceful.

"don't say do you want to hang out some time. instead, say let's hang out some time" is something multiple people have told me and I don't listen.
"don't punch your number in her phone. instead, get her phone number"

if a girl's interest is low, it's low. no matter how you ask her if she wants to hang out, her interest is low. if you are forceful and say "let's hang out" she might say yes. but guess what? an hour before she will cancel.

if she says she is not giving her number and asks you for your number, her interest is low. nothing you can do. Some men will even trick a woman in getting her number. They will say "ok I will punch my number in your phone" and then without her permission call themselves to get her number. guess what? her interest didn't change. the first time you text her she will block you.

in fact, I am less forceful to avoid time wasters. I say "do you want to hang out some time?" the high interest ones will say yes. the low interest ones will say no and you don't end up wasting your time on them. it could also be a reverse psychology thing, "do you want to hang out" gives the impression that I am not desperate, I am not forcing you to do anything.
Rip doc love. That og emphasize interest level. Compliance is king. You instruct. She follows or next. The game is catch and release. Modern women are the cause.
 

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espanish

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Rip doc love. That og emphasize interest level. Compliance is king. You instruct. She follows or next. The game is catch and release. Modern women are the cause.
compliance is just a measure of interest level. you tell her to do something to find out her interest level. this could even be a simple question. I asked this girl "are you an introvert or extrovert?" she said "well isn't it obvious?" no compliance. a compliant girl would answer the question directly.
 

Murk

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Rip doc love. That og emphasize interest level. Compliance is king. You instruct. She follows or next. The game is catch and release. Modern women are the cause.
I actually love how you haven't changed since joining the forum (barring the capslock phase you had), can tell it's you without looking at the username.

What's your current rotation/situation, you're London based too right?
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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compliance is just a measure of interest level. you tell her to do something to find out her interest level. this could even be a simple question. I asked this girl "are you an introvert or extrovert?" she said "well isn't it obvious?" no compliance. a compliant girl would answer the question directly.
Tell her to take her clothes off.
 

stringpuller

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a lot of men think you have to act like a man and be a leader to appear sexy to women. you have to be the decision maker. I agree with that. But I don't agree with this whole idea that you have to be forceful.

"don't say do you want to hang out some time. instead, say let's hang out some time" is something multiple people have told me and I don't listen.
"don't punch your number in her phone. instead, get her phone number"

if a girl's interest is low, it's low. no matter how you ask her if she wants to hang out, her interest is low. if you are forceful and say "let's hang out" she might say yes. but guess what? an hour before she will cancel.

if she says she is not giving her number and asks you for your number, her interest is low. nothing you can do. Some men will even trick a woman in getting her number. They will say "ok I will punch my number in your phone" and then without her permission call themselves to get her number. guess what? her interest didn't change. the first time you text her she will block you.

in fact, I am less forceful to avoid time wasters. I say "do you want to hang out some time?" the high interest ones will say yes. the low interest ones will say no and you don't end up wasting your time on them. it could also be a reverse psychology thing, "do you want to hang out" gives the impression that I am not desperate, I am not forcing you to do anything.
OP you are atleast initiating. Dont sweat it you are way ahead of it.
 

oldmanofthesea

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The purpose of communicating the date invite this way isn't about trying to force low-interest women to accept you; that won't work. It is about dominance and communication of value and it is one component of a larger picture.

How does a woman assess her interest level in you and what is she basing it on? If it is from a cold approach, it is from appearance (including how you dress, height, physique, face, hair, facial hair, etc), from how you talk to her, and from your sub-communications. The advice that recommends using phrases like, "We should go out for a drink later this week" instead of "Would you like to go out for a drink later this week?" is aimed at teaching blue pilled men how to lead, how to be dominant, and how to convey high value. Dominance and leadership make women wet. It is a major part of how a woman determines her interest level in you. All the things you do in your interactions with her are things she processes, often subconsciously, in order to determine her interest level. Game tries to teach ALL the many different ways a man can lead a woman and be dominant because unfortunately in today's age, men are not taught this, and third wave feminism and me-too etc have actually taught men NOT to lead and not to be masculine and not to be dominant. In addition, by inviting her on a date in a more "telling" than "asking" way, you are sub-communicating that you are used to every woman saying yes, because of course every woman would jump at the chance at going on a date with you so you tell her instead of asking her.

Just cold approaching a woman is dominant. Holding eye contact until a woman looks away is dominant. If you are about to cross paths with a woman you want to approach and you step in front of her (about 10 yards before you cross paths) and hold your hand up to get her attention and stop her is dominant. Challenging her answers or statements during conversation and not being easily impressed is dominant. Asking her for her number of out on a date are dominant. There are many more examples. I do all of these things, and all of them contribute to women forming high interest in me.

Will how you ask for a date alone make a difference in how a woman responds or how high her interest level is? Probably not. However, my experience is that asking in this way is part of following a consistent overall pattern of dominance and communication of value that attracts women and increases success. But by no means will how you phrase the date invite convert a low interest woman into a high interest woman. Again, it is about learning to be dominant and how to lead women at all points in your interactions with them, not forcing them into something they don't want.
 

espanish

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The purpose of communicating the date invite this way isn't about trying to force low-interest women to accept you; that won't work. It is about dominance and communication of value and it is one component of a larger picture.

How does a woman assess her interest level in you and what is she basing it on? If it is from a cold approach, it is from appearance (including how you dress, height, physique, face, hair, facial hair, etc), from how you talk to her, and from your sub-communications. The advice that recommends using phrases like, "We should go out for a drink later this week" instead of "Would you like to go out for a drink later this week?" is aimed at teaching blue pilled men how to lead, how to be dominant, and how to convey high value. Dominance and leadership make women wet. It is a major part of how a woman determines her interest level in you. All the things you do in your interactions with her are things she processes, often subconsciously, in order to determine her interest level. Game tries to teach ALL the many different ways a man can lead a woman and be dominant because unfortunately in today's age, men are not taught this, and third wave feminism and me-too etc have actually taught men NOT to lead and not to be masculine and not to be dominant. In addition, by inviting her on a date in a more "telling" than "asking" way, you are sub-communicating that you are used to every woman saying yes, because of course every woman would jump at the chance at going on a date with you so you tell her instead of asking her.

Just cold approaching a woman is dominant. Holding eye contact until a woman looks away is dominant. If you are about to cross paths with a woman you want to approach and you step in front of her (about 10 yards before you cross paths) and hold your hand up to get her attention and stop her is dominant. Challenging her answers or statements during conversation and not being easily impressed is dominant. Asking her for her number of out on a date are dominant. There are many more examples. I do all of these things, and all of them contribute to women forming high interest in me.

Will how you ask for a date alone make a difference in how a woman responds or how high her interest level is? Probably not. However, my experience is that asking in this way is part of following a consistent overall pattern of dominance and communication of value that attracts women and increases success. But by no means will how you phrase the date invite convert a low interest woman into a high interest woman. Again, it is about learning to be dominant and how to lead women at all points in your interactions with them, not forcing them into something they don't want.
thank you, I got it. and I felt like my question wasn't clear but based on your answer you got what I was trying to say.
 

Kotaix

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The inability of men to accept that a woman that they think is hot isn't into them is one of the biggest challenges he can face. Taking rejection personally is a self-reinforcing downward spiral.

I think interest level can actually be influenced, but only on first impression or first meeting. Even how you deal with their rejection can influence a woman's attraction, this is evidenced by men who are successful at being persistent.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

Concur 100% with Black Widow Void on this. He gave a good nuanced view.

Keep in mind this too: Most women respond well to dominance and most women are conflict averse. Why do I say those 2 things together? Because that explains why a woman might accept a date that is essentially requested in a command form (i.e. Come get a beer with me)…notice that grammatically that is a command not a question. It works for all the reasons BWV noted above.

BUT. Because women are conflict averse usually if she thinks it over and isn’t really that interested or alternatively has other options that she is much more interested in…she will then flake. Flaking over text is conflict avoidant. She doesn’t have to face you or hear disappointment in your voice.

I will tell a man straight up that I am not interested. I’m polite about it, but firm. That saves the dude time and energy. But few women will do this…fewer still do it gracefully.

You are always sorting for high interest. The faster you either get rejected outright or she flakes? The more efficient your efforts in finding a high interest woman are.

Value your time. If she rejects or flakes you simply move on. Adjust your thinking. Do you like ketchup with your fries? Yes or no? When you tell the drive through person no you aren’t hurting his or her feelings. They are on to the next order.

Be unconcerned with rejection & flaking. Take it as low interest and on to the next.

Be ruthlessly efficient with your time. This will benefit you in the long run.
 

VirtuousD

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It's all about having no ambiguity with your intent, dudes saying 'let's hang out this weekend' is better than 'would you like to hang out this weekend' are bsing the former is more than good enough the intent is clear. No need to use manipulative language.
 

Gamisch

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It's all about having no ambiguity with your intent, dudes saying 'let's hang out this weekend' is better than 'would you like to hang out this weekend' are bsing the former is more than good enough the intent is clear. No need to use manipulative language.
If a man is a skilled seducer then yes. But if he has trouble getting women , a subtle nuance like that could make a huge difference.

Do you ask your homie" would you like to play a game of pool with me this weekend"? Vs " lets play a game of pool this weekend".

It's much more about a certain state of mind, where a man is unapologetic and not afraid to express himself. It shows a woman you dgaf and have experience dealing with them to a point you dont think women are special angels from planet Heaven, but normal human creatures.

Again, this is really important for men who struggle with women. The" let's go" version is more leading, and when a man does this often he might reframe his way of interacting with women.
 

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darksprezzatura

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Advice from the old lady:

Concur 100% with Black Widow Void on this. He gave a good nuanced view.

Keep in mind this too: Most women respond well to dominance and most women are conflict averse. Why do I say those 2 things together? Because that explains why a woman might accept a date that is essentially requested in a command form (i.e. Come get a beer with me)…notice that grammatically that is a command not a question. It works for all the reasons BWV noted above.

BUT. Because women are conflict averse usually if she thinks it over and isn’t really that interested or alternatively has other options that she is much more interested in…she will then flake. Flaking over text is conflict avoidant. She doesn’t have to face you or hear disappointment in your voice.

I will tell a man straight up that I am not interested. I’m polite about it, but firm. That saves the dude time and energy. But few women will do this…fewer still do it gracefully.

You are always sorting for high interest. The faster you either get rejected outright or she flakes? The more efficient your efforts in finding a high interest woman are.

Value your time. If she rejects or flakes you simply move on. Adjust your thinking. Do you like ketchup with your fries? Yes or no? When you tell the drive through person no you aren’t hurting his or her feelings. They are on to the next order.

Be unconcerned with rejection & flaking. Take it as low interest and on to the next.

Be ruthlessly efficient with your time. This will benefit you in the long run.
Bump
 

Pan87

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The inability of men to accept that a woman that they think is hot isn't into them is one of the biggest challenges he can face. Taking rejection personally is a self-reinforcing downward spiral.

I think interest level can actually be influenced, but only on first impression or first meeting. Even how you deal with their rejection can influence a woman's attraction, this is evidenced by men who are successful at being persistent.
It shouldn’t be difficult.

And a man shouldn’t be thinking of ways to convert a girl into liking him, if she’s rejected him. He just walks away. If his walking away turns her on then he can pump and dump her walk away again.

But that’s rare. If a girl rejects a man she actually means it most of the time.

If a girl doesn’t like a man, he needs to stop being a scarce creep and take his attention elsewhere.

Wanting someone who doesn’t want you is tumbling, tumbling d1ckweed territory and says a whole lot about a man’s mental health and sense of self worth a value.
 
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