What would you estimate your rejection rate is?

GoodMan32

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Some guy on here was telling me 90% of men get rejected 90% of the time.

I'd say the topic warrants a thread of its own.

Although I admit I could be wrong, I have my doubts about his claim. As a man who's been rejected over 90% of the time (and has extremely low self-esteem because of it), I was under the impression a lot of men have rejection rates closer to 50/50.

So I'd like to hear everyone's input.
 

zekko

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Apples to oranges. One guy only asks out girls he is sure like him. The other guy spam mass approaches.
Yeah, it depends on your approach. If you do totally random approaches, the 90% reject rate is probably correct. If you choose prospects from women you already know, it's probably a lot less.
 

Isildur1

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From daygame there where different rejection rates -
Out of around 100 approaches roughly would gleen 4-6 dates and 4-6 dates would then gleen 1-2 lays of course there’s a lot of variance you’d need someone to do 500-100 approaches to get better numerical analysis - sometimes there would be lmr other dates would go bad for other reasons - poor mismatch etc.

Of course my rejection rates would vary from nation to nation- for example in London my rejection rates would be far higher than Shanghai - Ukraine my rejection rate would be higher than Brazil

so from city to city there are huge variances
 

Isildur1

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Also depends what you define as rejection- if it leads to a date but the date flops I still see that as “interest” or a success to some degree . If you’re looking at direct to lays then yeah roughly 97-98 percent “rejection rate”
 

plumber

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my rejection rate is about equal to the rate that I reject, not exactly but close.
 

Bible_Belt

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As a man who's been rejected over 90% of the time (and has extremely low self-esteem because of it)
Maybe you had low self esteem in the first place, then subconsciously chose women that you knew would reject you, in order to reinforce your preconceived notion of yourself.
 

Plinco

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I'm selective in my approaches, and I would say my rejection rate is something like 90%.
 

Hamurabimbi

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I usually ask her out when I’m pretty sure she’ll say ‘yes’. So my rejection rate is low.
 

GoodMan32

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My experience, rejection rate is low because I let the women come to me. I only select the ones with the highest interest.

Keep in mind, rejection rate gets lower with patience. Being hasty increases the dude’s rejection rate because he’s swinging for anything.
I suppose one explanation for my high rejection rate is: A lot of my successes, I don't count as successes (at least as far as calculating my success/rejection rate goes)

For example, the last woman I had free sex with (April 2021), I don't count as a success. Why? Even though I initiated the flirting, I only started flirting with her after finding out (from some guy we both knew) she's attracted to me.

Nailing a woman whom you only started flirting with after finding out she's into you is like getting an A on a test because you stole the teacher's answer key.

I don't count my last date (August 2023) as a success either. Because when I initially approached the woman, I had no intention of getting anything from her (plus, it was her who ultimately ended up expressing interest in me)

I don't count a date from 2018 as a success either. Because the woman made the move on me.

Nor do I count an instance of free sex from when I was 23 as a success. Because the sex just sort of happened (with neither of us making the official move)

I don't count any of my tech method successes either (On that note, I don't count any tech method rejections as rejections. I only count rejections from broads I met in person)

Now, I'm not saying I view these successes I just mentioned as rejections. I'm saying I totally exclude these successes when calculating my rejection/success rate.

To meet my definition of success (for calculating my rejection/success rate), all of the following need to be true:

  • I met her through somewhere other than a tech method
  • I expressed interest in her without officially knowing whether she's into me
  • I got a date, sex, or anything in between from her
There's only one broad who meets all those criteria (I'm pretty sure I've mentioned her on the forum before. A broad from a college class. She was so strange I had to dump her after a week or so)
 

GoodMan32

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Yeah, it depends on your approach. If you do totally random approaches, the 90% reject rate is probably correct. If you choose prospects from women you already know, it's probably a lot less.
While I've done random approaches, I've also expressed interest in my fair share of broads I already knew. Yet I still have an over 90% rejection rate.
 

GoodMan32

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From daygame there where different rejection rates -
Out of around 100 approaches roughly would gleen 4-6 dates and 4-6 dates would then gleen 1-2 lays of course there’s a lot of variance you’d need someone to do 500-100 approaches to get better numerical analysis - sometimes there would be lmr other dates would go bad for other reasons - poor mismatch etc.

Of course my rejection rates would vary from nation to nation- for example in London my rejection rates would be far higher than Shanghai - Ukraine my rejection rate would be higher than Brazil

so from city to city there are huge variances
That's fascinating to hear the broads are a lot easier in Shanghai and Brazil.
 

GoodMan32

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Also depends what you define as rejection- if it leads to a date but the date flops I still see that as “interest” or a success to some degree . If you’re looking at direct to lays then yeah roughly 97-98 percent “rejection rate”
Even a sexless first date that never leads to a 2nd date still counts as a success.
 

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GoodMan32

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my rejection rate is about equal to the rate that I reject, not exactly but close.
I can only recall one time when I rejected (I was in 7th grade)

Then there was a freshman girl my sophomore year I found out through the grapevine was into me. I had no attraction to her. She then found out through the grapevine I wasn't into her (and she ended up hating me). I don't know if that counts as me rejecting her (since the interaction was all done secondhand)

So yeah, there was a mere one girl at my high school who was into me. Just my luck that it turned out to be a girl I wasn't into.

I don't count any of the times I rejected gay guys as rejections. I'm straight; it's a given that I'm going to reject any gay man who comes onto me.
 

The Duke

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I define rejection rate by girls I met in public and asked for a phone # and they ignored my call/text, gave me a fake #, told me they had a boyfriend, or some other excuse because they never say no. Its probably 70%.

I am usually pretty calculated before I approach. I'll observe from afar and look for indicators of interest.
 
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GoodMan32

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I define rejection rate by girls I met in public and asked for a phone # and they ignored my call/text or gave me a fake #. Its probably 70%.

I am usually pretty calculated before I approach. I'll observe from afar and look for indicators of interest.
Pretty alarming that you still have a 70% rejection rate despite being calculated in your approach.

Then again, if I could get my 90-something percent rejection rate down to 70%, that would be a step in the right direction.
 

The Duke

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Pretty alarming that you still have a 70% rejection rate despite being calculated in your approach.

Then again, if I could get my 90-something percent rejection rate down to 70%, that would be a step in the right direction.
Its really not alarming. Its human nature. Here are a few ways to look at it:

-How many times does a guy on the street have to give his sales pitch before someone signs up? I bet the rejection rate is pretty similar.

-When I sold my last house, I had over 20 people come look at it. Three made similar offers, and I only accepted one of them because they brought more cash to the table and were less dependent on financing.

-When I walk into a public place I always scan the crowd for attractive women. Its very rare that there are more than 10% of the women there that I would even consider dating based on attractiveness. So on looks alone I have rejected 90% of the women there.

-Do you think a landlord accepts anyone that walks thru the door and wants to rent his property? For every 10 people that call, he won't even bother showing a property to half of those. Out of the remaining 5 there will be 2 or 3 suitable prospects that he thinks will pay rent on time, pass a credit check, and take care of his place. So 70-80% got rejected.

-According to google, a car salesman gets rejected by 70-80% of the people looking for cars.

The more you interact with the public, the more you understand rejection is actually pretty common.

ps. And this singles meet you went to you only asked one girl for her number and she declined. And you left mad after talking to the fat girl. You aren't even putting in the work it takes. I hope what I've shared puts things in perspective and you realize you are looking at this all wrong. Rejection is part of it.
 

corrector

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I suppose one explanation for my high rejection rate is: A lot of my successes, I don't count as successes (at least as far as calculating my success/rejection rate goes)

For example, the last woman I had free sex with (April 2021), I don't count as a success. Why? Even though I initiated the flirting, I only started flirting with her after finding out (from some guy we both knew) she's attracted to me.

Nailing a woman whom you only started flirting with after finding out she's into you is like getting an A on a test because you stole the teacher's answer key.

I don't count my last date (August 2023) as a success either. Because when I initially approached the woman, I had no intention of getting anything from her (plus, it was her who ultimately ended up expressing interest in me)

I don't count a date from 2018 as a success either. Because the woman made the move on me.

Nor do I count an instance of free sex from when I was 23 as a success. Because the sex just sort of happened (with neither of us making the official move)

I don't count any of my tech method successes either (On that note, I don't count any tech method rejections as rejections. I only count rejections from broads I met in person)

Now, I'm not saying I view these successes I just mentioned as rejections. I'm saying I totally exclude these successes when calculating my rejection/success rate.

To meet my definition of success (for calculating my rejection/success rate), all of the following need to be true:

  • I met her through somewhere other than a tech method
  • I expressed interest in her without officially knowing whether she's into me
  • I got a date, sex, or anything in between from her
There's only one broad who meets all those criteria (I'm pretty sure I've mentioned her on the forum before. A broad from a college class. She was so strange I had to dump her after a week or so)
I disagree with those parameters since these other one-off type of hits should be factored in as well, because sometimes you get lucky if you put in an effort. For example, if you approach 10 ladies, get no number, but another lady around saw you approaching, thought you were cute and went up to you to chat and that ended up going somewhere, then that should be counted as a success as it was related to the activity that you were doing.

Also, keep in mind, just because you had free sex doesn't mean you could not have had a rejection before it went that far. You could make an off-colour remark, or say something that would give her cold feet. You mentioned that before on a number of cases where a lady just left you. There is nothing guaranteed even if a lady is throwing herself on you. Therefore, as long as you are not paying for it, then it should could as a success. After all, a sale is a sale. If you make a sale with a difficult customer that has you pulling your hair and trying your patience, or have a bone-toss of an easy sale, it still more of a sale then if you put allot of effort and it's just going the wrong way.

The fact you said "free sex" means to me "I did not have to pay for this", how is that not a success?
 

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