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What do you guys think about purposely not kissing on the first date

samspade

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That's not really what I'm asking. I always randomly go for kisses in the middle of dates, idgaf if it's at an "optimal" moment or not. I'm asking if there is merit to purposely not doing it, especially at the end.
Oh. Only if you don't want to, I suppose.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Oh. Only if you don't want to, I suppose.
I don't when I don't like them lol.

The reason I made this thread is just as to see if there's a way to proactively reduce the odds of LMR and getting their hamster cage spinning. Basically by throwing their own psychology back at them.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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I’m not big on playing games. If I like a woman. I let her know.
That's what I've done for the past 10 years and that doesn't always go well. I'm not big on "gaming" women either, but at some point you have to do what you need to do stack the odds in your favor, especially if you're trying to get a steady rotation going.
 

MatureDJ

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I always like to peck on the cheek (unless things turn more amorous on their own). For the most part, a handshake is the clearest sign that you are not going to have sex with her ever (that said, I did have a plate that was like that, and she kept pushing our relationship, and eventually, the legs opened). A chick that wants more than a peck will position her head so that more is offered.

I think that the bottom line though is that a chick that is interested will make it easy for her man to escalate, or at least keep the tension up until it does. A man that tries to continue with a chick that is making it hard to escalate is only doing so because he is out of options.
 

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Hamurabimbi

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That's what I've done for the past 10 years and that doesn't always go well. I'm not big on "gaming" women either, but at some point you have to do what you need to do stack the odds in your favor, especially if you're trying to get a steady rotation going.
I understand the concept of gaming her. The use of ambiguity. And, it is well know to be effective. However, for me. Straight on pile-driver approach seems to work best. I let her know she’s hot and I want her.
 

MatureDJ

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I kiss girls on cheek when i meet them, i also give them a hug. What are you guys doing when you meet these girls? Shaking there hands like it's a buisness meeting?
I have no problem with shaking hands when I first meet a woman. It's good in and of itself, but it also allows me to determine if she has tranny hands. :eek: :eek: :eek:

 

Pierce.Manhammer

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As far as going for a kiss a great approach is to become a storyteller, if you’re able to hold her attention and make the story funny enough she’ll be laughing with you and at this height of emotion you go for the kiss, start with a peck, if she lingers just kiss her like she’s never been kissed.

If she recoils, you will be able to say something “sorry you just looked so beautiful, got carried away and continue as if nothing happened. If she continues to grow cold she wasn’t that into you but if you can move the conversation on she’ll drop it but you still will have very clearly shown her you won’t settle to be her emotional tampon.

this approach requires being able to be confident, be able to assemble a sentence, speak clearly and interestingly. If you’re not there yet, like well read on the classics and have some worldly knowledge, so if you’re not there it won’t work. Be clean, have a good haircut, smell good (don’t bathe in cologne), have some style and pizzazz.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Can you give an example of how you'd approach this during a drinks date?
Couple from not that long ago:
1) She was a hotel assist mgr at a hotel I attended a convention at. During the date I told her; ‘You’re the prettiest assistant manager I’ve ever met.’
2) another girl. During the date; I reached over & gently stroked the top of her hand and said; ‘you’re really cute.”
 
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Krueg

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Ha, you guys totatlly missed the point. Only WEAK ALPHA MALES try to win womens approval by giving them all the attention; thinking you will gain something.. FOOLS!! Are you not the PRIZE!? Women should be clawing for your attention, not the other way around. Good Luck!!
 

roaming shark

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Let's say you are on a date that does not make physical contact easy (like sitting across each other in a booth), and the only physical contact you have is an initial hug and maybe a couple touches on her arm or vice versa. Let's also assume there is actual chemistry and some degree of mutual attraction.

Would you still go for the cliche kiss at the end (or the cringe term "k-close") ? Personally...I think this can be predictable and tryhard. Literally every guy talks about how important it is to kiss her at the end, but is it really, when every simp in existence tries to?

Might it be valid to purposely avoid it, either go for a very obvious hug instead, or maybe even go as far as to feign it then pull away when you're 1 inch away? I have not tried this, generally I will only kiss them if there is a real mutual attraction, and I usually go for it when we go dancing or something. This is an idea I heard a long time ago and it's an interesting idea.
I don’t kiss close. I kiss near the end of the date, but while sitting next to the girl. I’ve just trained myself to look at her, grab her in and go for it. Sometimes you get rejected but it’s better than not. So many girls don’t expect it and are really surprised in a good way. This avoids the cheesy “walk her to the door” BS. I learned this from Todd V to be honest. It’s solid.
 

SW15

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Always go for the kiss!
Kissing should be a bare minimum.

Ultimately, it is always better to make a move. And don’t aim for a kiss. Aim for sex.
I have mixed feelings about aiming for sex on the first date. I think it depends on the individual man's goals.

I see the value in aiming for sex on a first date given that women's attention spans keep getting shorter. First date sex can be a way to get her invested in the interaction.

At the same time, no sex is better than bad sex if you want to get a 2nd date. It can be difficult to have amazing sex with someone who you met 2-3 hours ago.

A lot of same night lays and first date sex instances don't lead to second time sex. My personal goals involve longer term arrangments. One night stands are a form of inefficiency for me.

Physical escalation is a must on dates. Aiming for sex can be good but you've got to make sure that it is going to be good sex.
 

Striker_93

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At the same time, no sex is better than bad sex if you want to get a 2nd date. It can be difficult to have amazing sex with someone who you met 2-3 hours ago.

A lot of same night lays and first date sex instances don't lead to second time sex.
What ?

No it's not difficult to have amazing sex with a stranger lol

And if your actually good at sex then 9 times out of 10 there will be second, third, fourth and fifth time sex.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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What ?

No it's not difficult to have amazing sex with a stranger lol

And if your actually good at sex then 9 times out of 10 there will be second, third, fourth and fifth time sex.
In my experience women can be fairly idiosyncratic about sexual preferences, even over things as trivial as how you kiss them. For instance not all of them want you to pull their hair and choke them (though most do). Obviously there are universal things like kissing them on the neck or behind the ears, or slapping their ass, but that doesn't automatically mean good sex. And some are uncomfortable getting eaten out on 1st dates, too (even if they blow you first).
 

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SW15

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No it's not difficult to have amazing sex with a stranger lol

And if your actually good at sex then 9 times out of 10 there will be second, third, fourth and fifth time sex.
Yes, it is more difficult than one might think to have good sex with a stranger.

Often times, same night lay sex or first date from a swipe app sex is done late at night with multiple drinks in one's system. When two people are tired and impaired, that does not bode well for quality sex, especially when you have zero history together.

I agree that if you are good at sex, there will be second, third, fourth, and fifth time sex. However, if the first instance of sex is not good sex, there will not be second time sex. It's better to have first time sex when conditions are more ideal for having good first time sex.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Physical escalation is a must on dates. Aiming for sex can be good but you've got to make sure that it is going to be good sex.
The only ‘bad’ sex I’ve had are mediocre BJs. But that easily taken care of with: ‘Oh that’s great. Now I’m super horny & I want to put it in you.’
 

IKO69

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If it feels right go for it. Don't overthink these things man, it will hold you back.

You'll know from your interaction if it is a good idea or not. If she stops you, you just laugh it off (and generally don't take it further)
 
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