I met a girl online who's very sweet and innocent. It wasn't through a dating site, just kind of happened by chance. I started flirting with her and was very easygoing, and she was receptive. Over a period of 3 months, we talked more and more, sometimes much more than we should have. I was going through some personal difficulties and talking to her was a comfort to me. We became very close and the conversations became highly sexual. For example, she would orgasm every day just from chatting with me, often more than once. By the time I went to meet her, she was telling me that she loved me online.
When I did meet her, it was a weird situation. I stayed at her house with her very traditional parents. Her father is very against premarital sex, etc. Despite this, we had sex the first night I was there and she was clearly very into it. When we were done having sex she told me that she loved me again. Things were ok for the first few days but then it started getting odd. It's hard to describe but our interaction became more distant and she was acting less and less into me, despite the fact that whenever I would touch her she'd get wet and come quickly. By the end of the week, she broke up with me.
I was rather disoriented being away from home and knowing absolutely no one. We had nothing to do so we just talked forever, going over and over how we were feeling. Lame on my part, I know. Well, after a while of talking she decided randomly that she wanted to be in a LTR with me. So I figured what the hell and just let things be. A week went by when we were distant towards each other and when I raised this issue, she said she saw me more as a friend and that we should break up again. A few more days went by and I left to go back home. I talked to her briefly when I returned and she says that she sees me as a friend because there's no passionate, emotional bond between us even though the sex was good -- tho she says that when we were having sex it was lacking because she didn't feel an "emotional bond" despite the fact that she came a lot. She wouldn't even want to kiss me right now. She just feels "comfortable" with me.
Can anyone help me to sort this out and advise me on how to patch this up? This girl gave all indications that she was very into me and also I could tell when I was physical with her that she enjoyed it greatly (during she would beg me to keep doing something, etc). This is definitely not a typical LJBF scenario and I'm very confused as to what's wrong and how to fix it.
Keep in mind is that this girl is very inexperienced with guys and I'm only her second. I'm 99.9% sure shes not lying about this because I saw how she lives and she doesn't associate with anyone but her immediate family. With her first boyfriend, it was apparently passionate but she broke up with him because he was a "jerk." It's unlikely she'll meet anyone new anytime soon due to her circumstances.
My own thoughts are: first, because of where I was in my life I gave this girl much too much of my time in the beginning. Even though she was saying she was in love with me, we got too familiar and I made myself seem committed to her so she was allowed to take my presence for granted. Plus, when I got there we didn't do anything together. We just stayed inside for no reason for weeks so there were no shared experiences to bond us. We didn't do anything spontaneous. Also, I was probably just too damn nice to her but she's very innocent and easygoing so it's hard not to be.
Assuming I want to give it another shot with her, what should I do? Cut her off for a month then act more unpredictable with her when we finally talk again? Any comments would be great.
PS I've led her to believe that I feel the same way about her that she does about me, but still I want to try to rekindle what we had online and when we first met. That's basically true. I'm hardly passionately in love with her but I want to try getting back together with her for reasons that I cannot explain. Maybe I liked how it felt when she was saying she loved me but let's just say it's a personal challenge at this point in time.
When I did meet her, it was a weird situation. I stayed at her house with her very traditional parents. Her father is very against premarital sex, etc. Despite this, we had sex the first night I was there and she was clearly very into it. When we were done having sex she told me that she loved me again. Things were ok for the first few days but then it started getting odd. It's hard to describe but our interaction became more distant and she was acting less and less into me, despite the fact that whenever I would touch her she'd get wet and come quickly. By the end of the week, she broke up with me.
I was rather disoriented being away from home and knowing absolutely no one. We had nothing to do so we just talked forever, going over and over how we were feeling. Lame on my part, I know. Well, after a while of talking she decided randomly that she wanted to be in a LTR with me. So I figured what the hell and just let things be. A week went by when we were distant towards each other and when I raised this issue, she said she saw me more as a friend and that we should break up again. A few more days went by and I left to go back home. I talked to her briefly when I returned and she says that she sees me as a friend because there's no passionate, emotional bond between us even though the sex was good -- tho she says that when we were having sex it was lacking because she didn't feel an "emotional bond" despite the fact that she came a lot. She wouldn't even want to kiss me right now. She just feels "comfortable" with me.
Can anyone help me to sort this out and advise me on how to patch this up? This girl gave all indications that she was very into me and also I could tell when I was physical with her that she enjoyed it greatly (during she would beg me to keep doing something, etc). This is definitely not a typical LJBF scenario and I'm very confused as to what's wrong and how to fix it.
Keep in mind is that this girl is very inexperienced with guys and I'm only her second. I'm 99.9% sure shes not lying about this because I saw how she lives and she doesn't associate with anyone but her immediate family. With her first boyfriend, it was apparently passionate but she broke up with him because he was a "jerk." It's unlikely she'll meet anyone new anytime soon due to her circumstances.
My own thoughts are: first, because of where I was in my life I gave this girl much too much of my time in the beginning. Even though she was saying she was in love with me, we got too familiar and I made myself seem committed to her so she was allowed to take my presence for granted. Plus, when I got there we didn't do anything together. We just stayed inside for no reason for weeks so there were no shared experiences to bond us. We didn't do anything spontaneous. Also, I was probably just too damn nice to her but she's very innocent and easygoing so it's hard not to be.
Assuming I want to give it another shot with her, what should I do? Cut her off for a month then act more unpredictable with her when we finally talk again? Any comments would be great.
PS I've led her to believe that I feel the same way about her that she does about me, but still I want to try to rekindle what we had online and when we first met. That's basically true. I'm hardly passionately in love with her but I want to try getting back together with her for reasons that I cannot explain. Maybe I liked how it felt when she was saying she loved me but let's just say it's a personal challenge at this point in time.
