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Using other Guys to try and make me Jealous

RickPound

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The other guy was a ploy. Likely not even real.

She still cares - or she wouldn't have even told you this to provoke a reaction.

DO NOTHING.

If she reaches back out, aske her out. If sh says yes, great. If she says no, wish her a good night and delete her number.
i think you’re good to just chill on this. It was an honest mistake and you apologized. Her response was emotional because she cares and giving her a day or two to cool off and realize that will be all it takes. Come back holding your ground and showing interest and she’ll be enthusiastic for the next date.
 

Black Widow Void

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The funniest tragedy of all of this... is many of the above responses.

If a forum member posted about a date and the gal didn't show ... and she later explained that she'd overslept, most of you would be responding with "she was screwing someone else" . "next her" or "she'd better come to your house with a six pack and secs." And... here most of you are, unable to see the exact perspective when the shoe is on the other foot (when it happens to a woman).

If we accidentally stood up one of our pal's at a bar, we'd be picking up their tab on the next meeting (or at least the stand up men would do so) . Meanwhile, a lot of forum members above seem to have a bizarre attitude about "damage control" when it's standing up a woman.

I doubt that there was a guy (competition). She's obviously still invested or she wouldn't have bothered to say anything at all. If she expects you to grovel, then yeah, next her of course. But I don't think that'll be the case. You might want to sweeten the pot a little and buy her a nice meal or something. Hell, we'd buy drinks for a pal if we screwed up and so this really isn't much different.
 

HankMoody

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She texted me around 2pm today. Some screenshot that talks about her wanting to chase someone. Still didn't respond.

I agree that she's still invested. Why text anything at all? She's clamoring for some type of response from me.

She ain't getting one, though. Not yet, anyway.
 

HankMoody

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Yeah - just give her some space at this point. My guess is she will come back on her own honestly. Sometimes doing these things can actually work in your favor. She may give you some wild sex next time you see her and are back on good terms.
This is what she sent yesterday out of the blue. Have no idea what she's trying to get from me by sending this...

f590bb8e19d9e9b5ec189f98fc5284603166679f1af218a1284ea68bf374d8e7_1.jpg
 

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Bokanovsky

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The funniest tragedy of all of this... is many of the above responses.

If a forum member posted about a date and the gal didn't show ... and she later explained that she'd overslept, most of you would be responding with "she was screwing someone else" . "next her" or "she'd better come to your house with a six pack and secs." And... here most of you are, unable to see the exact perspective when the shoe is on the other foot (when it happens to a woman).
The fact of the matter is that 99% of the time, "I fell asleep" is a fake excuse. What we are dealing with in his thread is that rare 1% case when it's actually true.
 

samspade

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The funniest tragedy of all of this... is many of the above responses.

If a forum member posted about a date and the gal didn't show ... and she later explained that she'd overslept, most of you would be responding with "she was screwing someone else" . "next her" or "she'd better come to your house with a six pack and secs." And... here most of you are, unable to see the exact perspective when the shoe is on the other foot (when it happens to a woman).

If we accidentally stood up one of our pal's at a bar, we'd be picking up their tab on the next meeting (or at least the stand up men would do so) . Meanwhile, a lot of forum members above seem to have a bizarre attitude about "damage control" when it's standing up a woman.

I doubt that there was a guy (competition). She's obviously still invested or she wouldn't have bothered to say anything at all. If she expects you to grovel, then yeah, next her of course. But I don't think that'll be the case. You might want to sweeten the pot a little and buy her a nice meal or something. Hell, we'd buy drinks for a pal if we screwed up and so this really isn't much different.
Yeah I was thinking the same thing.

I was going to say that OP's interest level must have been low...when a guy wants to be with a girl, he'll move mountains to make it happen. Right?
 

HaleyBaron

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Me: "Let's not play these games. I screwed up last night, and I apologized."
AAAAAH! You ****ed up here. Don't EVER say anything about games, about tricks, or about anything related to that. Women use those terms. As a man, you don't care about that ****. Remain aloof, pretend you don't know what's going on. That was a **** test and you failed it horribly.

NEVER think in a woman's frame. Let her come to the solution herself. Now she knows you knew, so she has the advantage. You screwed up.

I've done what she said countless times to other women. I just went "Oops" or gave some small reason. Don't ever apologize. You're running your life, not her.
 

HankMoody

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Is it just me or is this just...weird?
I have no idea what the fvck just happened.
It is a Craigslist post from 2016 that went viral. Somebody posted an ad looking for 'someone to chase.'
 

HankMoody

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This is very odd. I don't know what that means either but she sounds crazy. Definitely nothing more than plate material sending something like that.
I think she has a hopeless romantic side and wants that picture-perfect pursuit of a guy, where SHE is the one that can finally nail him down.
Idk.

Anyway, she called me about an hour ago, THIS time she mentioned 'this guy Billy, he's a chef, he's going to give me a ride home tomorrow."

I didn't even react to it. Said "Okay." Then continued on with the subject we were talking about.
 

Barrister

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I think she has a hopeless romantic side and wants that picture-perfect pursuit of a guy, where SHE is the one that can finally nail him down.
Idk.

Anyway, she called me about an hour ago, THIS time she mentioned 'this guy Billy, he's a chef, he's going to give me a ride home tomorrow."

I didn't even react to it. Said "Okay." Then continued on with the subject we were talking about.
The fact she is still talking to you after acting like it was such a major deal means she still wants you. I would maintain a little more distance than you're doing to really send her into a tailspin. She is going to come around - just a matter of when and if you want to deal with her.
 

HankMoody

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The fact she is still talking to you after acting like it was such a major deal means she still wants you. I would maintain a little more distance than you're doing to really send her into a tailspin. She is going to come around - just a matter of when and if you want to deal with her.
Word. Thanks.
 

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Clamslammer

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This is a different girl than the one I've recently posted about.

Known for 3 months. Sex is great. Still casual.

I was supposed to meet her at a bar in another town last night. Got ready, and ended up dozing off on my couch. She texts me around 3 this morning saying 'take care. Good luck to you. Lose my number.'

I respond when I wake up this morning, "I understand. I'm sorry about last night." She then responded right away with 'why did you lie to me?'

....anyway, an hour ago, she texts me "I'm calling another guy to come pick me up in a few hours."

Me: "Let's not play these games. I screwed up last night, and I apologized."

Her: "I'm literally not playing a game."


How do I respond? Should I at all?

And just generally, how do I keep my frame when she tries to use other guys to make me jealous.
Respond with "Have Fun"

Be indifferent and walk away
 

malz1

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I think she has a hopeless romantic side and wants that picture-perfect pursuit of a guy, where SHE is the one that can finally nail him down.
Idk.

Anyway, she called me about an hour ago, THIS time she mentioned 'this guy Billy, he's a chef, he's going to give me a ride home tomorrow."

I didn't even react to it. Said "Okay." Then continued on with the subject we were talking about.
Lmao... this chick is a huge red flag. Run. Quickly. Im confident the guys here trying to mediate a solution to this probably have less exposure to women so her behavior seems socially acceptable to them. THIS is the type of chick that will play you and the friends/family around you - worst the cops. She sounds apathetic, insecurely combative, and out of touch w/ reality. Don't let a night of good sex lure you into entertaining her.
 

HankMoody

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Lmao... this chick is a huge red flag. Run. Quickly. Im confident the guys here trying to mediate a solution to this probably have less exposure to women so her behavior seems socially acceptable to them. THIS is the type of chick that will play you and the friends/family around you - worst the cops. She sounds apathetic, insecurely combative, and out of touch w/ reality. Don't let a night of good sex lure you into entertaining her.
I'm totally being blinded by her insane body and magical pvssy. This is my problem....I often ignore red flags in women when the physical is soooo good.

She called me earlier while I was at the airport. Remember the other day when she texts me that she'll 'call another guy to come pick her up.' ?

Well this afternoon, she makes sure to tell me on the phone, "this guy Billy, he's a chef, he's going to take me back tomorrow."
 
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LiveYourDream

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I think it would serve you to respect yourself and your own time more. On-going crazy-like behavior from women should be a sign to next them. Why do you accept/tolerate crazy into your life this way? Some men seek to screw anything. So they tolerate crazy. That’s certainly their choice and they are welcome to it. You, as I understand are looking for more than that. If that is true...Raise your standards. Otherwise your life may sink to the level of crazy you keep entertaining. Actions over words. What do you want most???
 

mrgoodstuff

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I think it would serve you to respect yourself and your own time more. On-going crazy-like behavior from women should be a sign to next them. Why to you accept/tolerate crazy into your life this way? Some men seek to screw anything. So they tolerate crazy. You as I understand are looking for more than that. Raise your standards. Otherwise your life mat sink to theirs.
Crazy and irrational GRAB A TON of attention and thought which could have been used for instead to better yourself and a positive viewpoint.
 
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