Unsatisfied after not opening a girl at a coffee shop

[Vero Della Rosa]

She was smilin at me from across the room, had a fantastic body (short, thin, big boobs), and I did nothin.

I need to learn how to open and flirt. I used to always be called a ladies man so I feel like I just need to wake that side up again or somethin.

I pretty much only know Todd V and Roosh.

I wanna act. Please recommend me a plan, a book recommendation, a solid practice-oriented person. I'm tired of doin nothin!

 

[BackInTheGame78]

OK, now you understand that the pain of regret stings more and lasts longer than a rejection.

 

[Bingo-Player]

OK, now you understand that the pain of regret stings more and lasts longer than a rejection.

If this chick was giving choosing signals OP defenitley did fumble the bag by not approaching

but he doesn't sound at all confident in his ability to approach so would have probably fvcked it up anyway

OP cold approach is not something that can be taught you can watch hours of guys doing it on YouTube but its very much a solo journey travelling through the deepest darkest corners of rejection and humiliation your endurance and resilience will be tested too the Nth degree but you will learn and hone your skills with each approach

This is in part what will make you ready when you do finally meet a chick who's into you and not fvck it up

there's no guide or plan you just have to go and do it

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I need to learn how to open and flirt. I used to always be called a ladies man so I feel like I just need to wake that side up again or somethin.

By whom?
And why?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If this chick was giving choosing signals OP defenitley did fumble the bag by not approaching

but he doesn't sound at all confident in his ability to approach so would have probably fvcked it up anyway

OP cold approach is not something that can be taught you can watch hours of guys doing it on YouTube but its very much a solo journey travelling through the deepest darkest corners of rejection and humiliation your endurance and resilience will be tested too the Nth degree but you will learn and hone your skills with each approach

This is in part what will make you ready when you do finally meet a chick who's into you and not fvck it up

there's no guide or plan you just have to go and do it

Doesn't matter if he fvcked it up or not.

You are going to fail a lot before you figure out how to succeed. Trying to avoid it instead of embracing it will not get you anywhere.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

I get IOIs or "choosing signals" very often and don't always capitalize on it either and it's always a shvtty, shvtty feeling that stays with me for days or weeks. I still remember some from years ago, yet have forgotten 99% of rejections in that same period. What's crazy is, you might talk to them and realize they aren't that interesting, or maybe you misinterpreted - either way, you'll feel 100% better knowing that you at least tried.

This reminds me of a recent incident where this big tittied young girl gave me her # and I didn't save her name on my phone. I was all fretting all night over, but when I finally found her #, I found out she lived almost an hour away and ended up telling her I wasn't interested, and completely stopped caring. I think this comes down to what's in your control. This is why breaking up with a girl is 1000x easier than vice versa, because the latter is out of your control.

Anyway, to get back on point: Your concern is 100% valid, it is a missed opportunity plain and simple. And I do not know if I can speak for you on this part OP, but this is not based off fear of rejection, in fact the opposite. Getting rejected is easy; you walk away, and you have nothing else to do. When a girl gives you the greenlight it can actually be more intimidating because you have to act fast and capitalize on it in a short window with a sudden burden of responsibility hoisted on you. I don't really have an answer to this, but, just know it doesn't fvcking matter what you say. If a girl gives you the greenlight, you can literally say "hi" and the interaction is likely to go well, she may even carry it and chase you. If it goes horribly you might feel a bit shvtty but certainly less shvtty than you will from bvtching out.

If this chick was giving choosing signals OP defenitley did fumble the bag by not approaching

but he doesn't sound at all confident in his ability to approach so would have probably fvcked it up anyway

OP cold approach is not something that can be taught you can watch hours of guys doing it on YouTube but its very much a solo journey travelling through the deepest darkest corners of rejection and humiliation your endurance and resilience will be tested too the Nth degree but you will learn and hone your skills with each approach

This is in part what will make you ready when you do finally meet a chick who's into you and not fvck it up

there's no guide or plan you just have to go and do it

There's no point in thinking of this as "approaching" with a PUA mentality.

If you're at the point where a girl gives you an IOI it's like calling a hot lead for a sales pitch; the product (you) sells itself. I actually think it's only worth talking to women who gives you IOIs, for the most part.

 

[Ricky]

She was smilin at me from across the room, had a fantastic body (short, thin, big boobs), and I did nothin.

I need to learn how to open and flirt. I used to always be called a ladies man so I feel like I just need to wake that side up again or somethin.

I pretty much only know Todd V and Roosh.

I wanna act. Please recommend me a plan, a book recommendation, a solid practice-oriented person. I'm tired of doin nothin!

I havent read too much of the day game material but situational openers always work well. Roosh mentions using old person openers in the few pages i read in Day Bang I believe it is. In a sense use the same opener a nice older person would do. He gave an example about an old person asking him about the computer he had.

roosh found such simple non-threatening opener worked well for women during the day and differentiated between day game and night game