The worst day of my professional life

Fruitbat

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I’m in business to business sales and manage a region about the size of a state like Maryland (5M)

my job is to generally meet business in small (1-5) meetings and occasionally a large event like 10-40.

my boss put me into a large conference. I shared the stage with 5 other people, all of which were experts or national managers - all several ranks senior and in other companies. I was representing ours.

I was out of my depth. My talk was good but scripted - others didn’t script. There were 120 people in the room, TV cameras, an elevated stage etc.

Nobody told me - but there was a Q and A at the end where I sat on a couch with 2 competitors. The questions were well above my pay grade. I couldn’t answer and I kind of went blank. My answers were kind of babble except for one, and two questions I was so intimidated I didn’t even say anything and just kind of waved them away - I wasn’t in a full panic attack but I was totally rattled.

it was extremely embarrassing. FYI this isn’t really my pay grade. My bosses weren’t there but they will see the feedback.

pretty devestated. I am consoling myself that my boss chose me out of many others and also I had the balls to try and others said they wouldn’t do it. also that this one experienced has taught me how not to do it.

hoping for some encouragement as I’m well out of my comfort zone and feel awful.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Getting harshly shaken from your comfort zone is supposed to make you feel awful, but failures like these are necessary for improving yourself. The awful feeling will go away, but I think you realise now you were ill-prepared and not yet experienced enough to 'wing' it, but from now on you will prepare better and work on your damage control mind for when you have to talk when you have nothing to say.

I commend you for at least taking the stage even when you're pulled out of your comfort zone. An audience of 20-40 people is a lot less intimidating than 100+. And public speaking is one of the highest anxieties for most people, even when it's just a toast at a wedding.
While the others on the stage probably noticed that you were out of your depth, at least you tried and the audience is generally positive about people having the balls to at least give it their best shot.
 

Fruitbat

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Getting harshly shaken from your comfort zone is supposed to make you feel awful, but failures like these are necessary for improving yourself. The awful feeling will go away, but I think you realise now you were ill-prepared and not yet experienced enough to 'wing' it, but from now on you will prepare better and work on your damage control mind for when you have to talk when you have nothing to say.

I commend you for at least taking the stage even when you're pulled out of your comfort zone. An audience of 20-40 people is a lot less intimidating than 100+. And public speaking is one of the highest anxieties for most people, even when it's just a toast at a wedding.
While the others on the stage probably noticed that you were out of your depth, at least you tried and the audience is generally positive about people having the balls to at least give it their best shot.
thanks man but I would add - I was super prepared for my speech BUT I wasn’t told there would be Q and A.

I had to deliver a technical presentation I didn’t create, on a subject I don’t know and then do a q and a next to two experts in a field I don’t know. this is why I’m quite p-off.
Also 2 of my colleagues refused it but I don’t, I never turn stuff like this down and I NEVER quit.

thanks for your kind words but it smarts, it was quite literally a bad dream but I did walk off stage with my shoulders back and made sure I spend the rest of the day walking tall and with a smile.

thing is I could do it if this was my full time job. Today was like asking a garage mechanic to suddenly work in a pit lane of a formula 1 team.

I will get audience feedback within 1 week. If it’s high I’ll keep quiet. If it’s low I’ll call a meeting with my boss and explain what happened and that I need Media training if I’m going to do these again
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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I will get audience feedback within 1 week. If it’s high I’ll keep quiet. If it’s low I’ll call a meeting with my boss and explain what happened and that I need Media training if I’m going to do these again
I suggest you take some media training to work on your ability to 'wing' it.

thanks for your kind words but it smarts, it was quite literally a bad dream but I did walk off stage with my shoulders back and made sure I spend the rest of the day walking tall and with a smile.
Call that a win. Like a garage mechanic surviving an F1 pits stop without crashing the racer.
 

BillyPilgrim

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If this ever happens again OP and god forbid it doesn't, you can always belt out "I am the Eggman, they are the Eggman, I am the Walrus!!" with the coo-coo-cha-coo part being optional.

No one's going to expect anything from a Walrus, so you'd be off the hook.
 
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Peace and Quiet

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And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

AmsterdamAssassin

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Fwiw, I find successful people to be very self-critical. Your perception of your performance is not necessarily the same as everyone else's.
Indeed. I think you should wait for the feedback from your audience before you take action.
 

FlirtLife

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The questions were well above my pay grade.
It sounds like someone else was supposed to be there, and didn't show up.

I had to deliver a technical presentation I didn’t create, on a subject I don’t know and then do a q and a next to two experts in a field I don’t know. this is why I’m quite p-off.
Also 2 of my colleagues refused it but I don’t, I never turn stuff like this down and I NEVER quit.
Same - someone else's presentation, who wasn't there.

If this was someone else's job, I would highlight that you were "filling in for ... at the last minute". The blame should go on the person who didn't show up, who didn't give their own presentation.
 

Pandora

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I’m in business to business sales and manage a region about the size of a state like Maryland (5M)

my job is to generally meet business in small (1-5) meetings and occasionally a large event like 10-40.

my boss put me into a large conference. I shared the stage with 5 other people, all of which were experts or national managers - all several ranks senior and in other companies. I was representing ours.

I was out of my depth. My talk was good but scripted - others didn’t script. There were 120 people in the room, TV cameras, an elevated stage etc.

Nobody told me - but there was a Q and A at the end where I sat on a couch with 2 competitors. The questions were well above my pay grade. I couldn’t answer and I kind of went blank. My answers were kind of babble except for one, and two questions I was so intimidated I didn’t even say anything and just kind of waved them away - I wasn’t in a full panic attack but I was totally rattled.

it was extremely embarrassing. FYI this isn’t really my pay grade. My bosses weren’t there but they will see the feedback.

pretty devestated. I am consoling myself that my boss chose me out of many others and also I had the balls to try and others said they wouldn’t do it. also that this one experienced has taught me how not to do it.

hoping for some encouragement as I’m well out of my comfort zone and feel awful.
The first time doing anything is rough. The next time you will kill it bro.
 

Ricky

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The Q and A part of talks are a whole nother beast. A colleague just gave a talk in October and she got peppered with so many questions afterwards and couldn't answer most of them. This happens a lot to be honest. Not sure what you could do next time other than have a test audience to run your talks past and anticipate the questions.
 

Scaramouche

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Fwiw, I find successful people to be very self-critical. Your perception of your performance is not necessarily the same as everyone else's.
Hi Bibles,
You stole my thunder,exactly my thoughts....An Old Englishman told me years ago a good wrinkle is to answer the unfathomable in three Parts,Well in the Past...In the present day....And in the future...Gives you time to think....A colleague years ago when confronted with questions meant to undermine,opined,"Well this just illustrates the truism that the dumbest person on Earth,can ask questions that the cleverest person can't answer.
 

Fruitbat

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Fwiw, I find successful people to be very self-critical. Your perception of your performance is not necessarily the same as everyone else's.
I appreciate the vote of confidence but the dudes next to me on the couch were giving coherent answers. The audience might have liked my talk - which I did put a lot of effort into, but the questions I was demonstrably rattled and it was painfully obvious.

however the, most the audience would have known from my job role and age (I was a good 10 years younger than everyone else and less experienced) that I was in pretty deep and might have felt a bit of sympathy. But I don’t really want sympathy TBH.

What annoys me is if i had known, I would have spent 4 hours or so researching how to develop the skills for a session like this. I didn’t see it coming. Little skills like “well, that’s not a question for me so I can’t offer much and my co paneller will give you a better answer ” or having a couple of anecdotes would have helped.
 

Fruitbat

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The Q and A part of talks are a whole nother beast. A colleague just gave a talk in October and she got peppered with so many questions afterwards and couldn't answer most of them. This happens a lot to be honest. Not sure what you could do next time other than have a test audience to run your talks past and anticipate the questions.
what was hard was I was in with people who had clearly done it before. And they knew their subject.

I think the learn from this is that my company needs to send the right people for the right job.

i can learn to do this but it’s a full time job.
 

Fruitbat

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Interestingly I have had really positive feedback .

I def messed up the questions but my analysis is that I might have been so rattled by the pressure that I’ve totally misinterpreted the mood.

I’ve done this before. Done talks and walked off and thought “career over” and then my boss has given me kudos and promoted me.

issue is no matter how well I do, it’s never enough.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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I’ve done this before. Done talks and walked off and thought “career over” and then my boss has given me kudos and promoted me.
Congratulations, seems like @Bible_Belt was right about being too critical on yourself.

issue is no matter how well I do, it’s never enough.
You can work on that. Like I said, I don't compete with others, but I do look critically at my Past Self in order to improve my Future Self. Take what happened as a life lesson and use this experience to improve yourself.
 

BaronOfHair

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I’m in business to business sales and manage a region about the size of a state like Maryland (5M)

my job is to generally meet business in small (1-5) meetings and occasionally a large event like 10-40.

my boss put me into a large conference. I shared the stage with 5 other people, all of which were experts or national managers - all several ranks senior and in other companies. I was representing ours.

I was out of my depth. My talk was good but scripted - others didn’t script. There were 120 people in the room, TV cameras, an elevated stage etc.

Nobody told me - but there was a Q and A at the end where I sat on a couch with 2 competitors. The questions were well above my pay grade. I couldn’t answer and I kind of went blank. My answers were kind of babble except for one, and two questions I was so intimidated I didn’t even say anything and just kind of waved them away - I wasn’t in a full panic attack but I was totally rattled.

it was extremely embarrassing. FYI this isn’t really my pay grade. My bosses weren’t there but they will see the feedback.

pretty devestated. I am consoling myself that my boss chose me out of many others and also I had the balls to try and others said they wouldn’t do it. also that this one experienced has taught me how not to do it.

hoping for some encouragement as I’m well out of my comfort zone and feel awful.
Cheer up, monkey. You haven't experienced awkwardness at the office, UNTL you've

-Carried on an affair with your superior's fiance

-Had her leak video footage of your romps together to several of your colleagues, including said superior, after she discovered you were cheating on her

Goes without saying, I had a tough time with references, after my tenure at this particular corporation abruptly ended
 
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