The ultimate CLUB guide

pootwo

Don Juan
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#1
PART 1

That’s right. The DJ’s worst enemy.. The club. Many people have said that picking up women in a club is very difficult & that all your DJ skills count for nothing. But, whether you like it or not, we are the clubbing generation, & so, I think it’s very important that handling a club environment should become part of your DJ skills.

Who to go with

Just go with your best mates. Simple as that. Though, if your objective is to get yourself a lady, then I wouldn’t go in a huge group. I’ll explain why later.

If you have friends who don’t want to go out to a club cause “it’s not their scene” then, well, you have a challenge on your hands. I’ve been there myself, but I managed to change their minds over time. You may not be so lucky. If not, then… you may just have to find more friends.

Some people on this site have said that they go out to clubs on their own. Personally, I could never do that. I just need to be around some friends. I wouldn’t recommend going alone, especially if you’re not experienced with going out.

Appearance

Now, what you wear when you go to a club is always important. Some of the people I go out with usually wear scruffy clothes like baggy jeans & a hoodie. As we mainly go out on “student nights” this kind of dress is allowed. They don’t really make an effort cause they just go for the drink & laughs. BUT you are a DJ. You must stand out & take pride in your appearance. I always wear a nice shirt, nice trousers & nice shoes. It gives you a respectable look & shows you’re ‘a cut above the rest’.

Also, try to groom yourself properly. Shave before you go out, & do something nice with your hair.
An essential item you should ALWAYS take with you is a PEN. Try not to get a normal sized one either as they are very fiddly & it’s hard to find a place to keep it on you all night. I take one of those little tiny ones that you can steal from all good catalogue or betting shops. If you don’t have one of these then you could just break a biro in half.
It’s also a good idea to take some small scraps of paper or tissues in your pocket for scribbling down those digits.

Drink?

This is just a small section. It’s been said a lot on this site that when you go out you shouldn’t drink a lot as this hinders your DJ skills. I have to disagree with this. I think drink is an important part of the going out experience.
I’m not saying that you should get absolutely wasted to the point where you can barely stand & your conversation has turned to ramblings about why Thundercats is better than He-Man (yes, I have actually done that), but you should still have enough alcohol to enjoy yourself. Besides, the more you drink the more confidence it gives you. So, I think you should drink till you’re ‘merry’… but try not to get completely wankered.

Dancing

By far the most important part of going out to a club. After all, isn’t that THE reason people go? Now, if you can’t dance then this will seriously damage your chances with the ladies. But, this will only be a minor set back.
There is a magic way that WILL let you become the lord of the dance… its called PRACTICE. I know it sounds like hard work but if you want to be a better dancer then this is the only way.

When I first started going out clubbing I was the worst dancer you can imagine. I had no flow, I felt awaked, & my moves were very rigid & un-natural. In fact, the first time I went clubbing I was so embarrassed with my dancing that I didn’t go out again for over a year! After this time when I started going out again I was still the same, but instead of hiding in my room thinking about what I could be doing to those ladies, I did something about it!

What I did…
I started watching a lot of those dance music channels on TV to see what kind of moves people were doing & I tried some stuff out myself in my room in front of the mirror.
Yeah yeah, I know it’s a bit sad & pathetic, but it’s better to practice on your own in your room than in the middle of a crowded dance floor.

I also read a lot of things on this website about joining a Salsa dance class to improve your moves. I did this, & it was a lot of fun & gave me more confidence with my dancing.
After all this I felt nothing could stop me. I hit the clubs & danced my heart out until sweat was dripping from my body. I certainly was enjoying myself.
BUT, I had been told that what I was doing looked very gay & some people were embarrassed by my dancing. I looked in the mirror at my moves & I couldn’t believe what I was doing. My arms & legs were making very wild & extravagant moves, but the biggest problem was my hips. They were shaking around like mad. I was dancing like a camp Ricky Martin on ecstasy in a gay club.

It seems I went from one extreme (being under confident with rigid movement) to another (over confident with too much movement). So, I toned it down. I try not to move my hips as much (if at all) & try not to put to much energy into my legs. This has improved my appearance on the dance floor by miles. I’m still not the best dancer in the world, but it’s a continuous development that will probably never end. The truth is, every time I dance I improve a little on last time. Which is why PRATICE is the best way to improve.

Think of it like learning to drive. The first time you’re behind the wheel you don’t know what you’re doing. You stall it, push the pedals down to far, almost crash into a lamppost, run over old man Robinson’s cat, etc. Everyone is like that the first time. But the more time you spend driving the better you get. It’s the same with dancing.

I also what to add that VAIRIETY in your moves can help you as well. In clubs EVERY guy is doing pretty much the same dance, & they do the same thing all night. I like to adapt my moves to whatever song is on.

FOR EXAMPLE… If a Justin Timberlake song comes on, then I do that Michael Jackson type dance that he does. I try to adapt my style with every song. Not only will you enjoy yourself more, but for anyone watching you’ll seem like a much more interesting person than everyone else doing the same generic dance all night.

So, in short. Practice practice practice. It’s the only way you’ll improve.
And a lil’ tip. Don’t go wild or over the top with your dancing… it DOES look gay.
Also, try to put some variety in your moves.

Well. That’s it for PART 1 of this guide.
Continue reading for PART 2…
 

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pootwo

Don Juan
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#2
PART 2

Approaches

Ah, the all-important approach. So, you’re at the club, you want some female company, but what do you do about it?

  • At the bar
You’ve just gone up to the bar to get a drink. There are some extremely hot babes to the left & right of you. What do you do?
You turn to one of them, & say “alright?” with a nice smile. That’s it. That’s how you break the ice. Simple as that. She will almost certainly give a warm response to this, unless she’s a mega b***h, in which case, you’re better off with out her.
From this moment you can get through the introductions, etc. If you have trouble thinking of what to say after this though, say something like “I haven’t seen you here before”, which should lead to a good conversation that could go anywhere. If there is a long queue you could comment on the service, etc. There are many things that you could go with from here. Use your imagination.

  • On the dance floor
Right. You’re dancing away with your friends in your circle. How do you get action with the ladies? (NOTE: this tip is great for people new to clubs or who are abit shy)

As I said earlier, it’s best to dance in small groups. Dancing on your own makes you look like a bit of a loser with no friends. 2 people is OK, but it can look a lil’ gay. I have found that 3 is the perfect number of people in your group. 4 is also great, 5 is pushing it, & anything over that seriously damages any chances for some easy action with the girls. A large group dancing together just looks like a bunch of guys out having fun. A small group is far more approachable. I’ve noticed that most girls dance in groups of 3-5, so you should go for the same thing.
Now, while you’re dancing away in your circle, you spot a group of girls dancing together. So, you just gradually head in their direction until you’re right next to them. You could try rubbing yourself against one of them or try to break into their circle. Once you’ve got this far, the girls are yours!
I find this is more respectable & easier than just grinding away at the nearest woman’s behind.

  • The “Classic” approach
This is the age-old technique that is the foundation for every DJ approach. You know the one. You’re there in the club; you spot a girl you like. So, you try to establish eye contact. Once she’s looking at you, you give a little smile. If she smiles back then, maybe give her a wave, then get your ass over there & introduce yourself! That’s it. Simple. Eh?

Now you’re dancing with the girl!

Yeah, this section should be simple common sense. I’m ashamed that I even have to post this, but believe me, I have seen girls really coming on to some guys, being very suggestive & rubbing their asses against these guys crouches… & they just stand there, doing that stepping from side to side dance with a “OMG! A girl! What do I do?!?!?” look on their face. Most of you can just skip this part, but if that guy I just described is you… then read on.

So, you’re on the dance floor, you’re dancing with that HB you had your eye on earlier. She’s doing that leg-humping thing on you, & you’re grinding away at her ass. But where do you go from here?
Now, of course every situation is unique, & there is no set rules of what to do with your woman on that dance floor, but here is a rough outline of what I usually do.

You’re dancing away, you’ve gone through the intros, and then, after dancing for a few minutes, you hold her close to you, look into her eyes, & go for the kiss. Take it nice & slowly, no tongue, unless she initiates it. Then, pull back, & smile. If she does the same then go for those lips again. This time, get that tongue in there, but do it SLOWLY.

Take this opportunity to move your hand down to her ass. If she’s not ok with this she’ll make a polite ‘no-no’ gesture, but most girls will love it. After you’ve been doing this for a while, move your hand up her body, to her boobs. Yeah, give that baby a little squeeze.
Again, if she doesn’t want this she’ll indicate this to you. In which case, she probably won’t go home with you tonight anyway, so it’s best to number close after kissing her for a short while more.

Anyway, if she’s OK with the boob squeezing, do that for a while, then move your mouth to her ear & say something like “do ya wanna get outta here?” If she says “yes”, then lucky you. If not then you can either number close, or get as much now as you can, though, if she’s got one of those proper dress things then you should get her number now & get yourself a drink.

If she’s got a separate top on…
Carry on kissing her, etc. but, after a while, try putting your hand up her top. If she lets you do this then you’ve got an interesting evening to look forward to. If she lets you play with her boobs in this way then you should use your other hand to direct her hand around your body.
After doing this for a while, move your hand from her top, down her belly, & down those panties. Use those magic fingers to do their work, & guide her hand to more adventurous places. Do this for a while, then move to her ear again & say “are you sure you don’t want to get out of here?” Now, if she says “no” now then she ain’t coming home with you tonight. So, carry on for a bit, stop, make some excuses like “I need a drink” or “my friends will be wondering where I got to”, ask for her number, & you’re away.



Well, that’s pretty much it I think. All the information here is based on all my experience going clubbing over the years. Good luck. I hope it’s been enlightening.

THE END…?
 

Matt Rogers

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2003
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#4
I beg to disagree. Part 2 was fantastic. It provides the basis to kino that can move you to a lay, without having to say more than a few words.
 
Joined
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#6
Id like to had to part 2:

If the girl is rubbing her ass on you,you might as well do some "dirty dancing" with her(gesturing ass-slapping and some type of ****ing).If the girl is into this,this is a crowd pleaser.
 

Elimidate

Senior Don Juan
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#9
Drinking alcohol is for people with no balls!

Let's not turn this into a previous post, but wheelin, I wouldn't go that far, there's a time and place for everything. Some of my best ONS with HB have been while I was drunk.

The secret is to ALWAYS be less drunk than her. When it doubt and she's holding a drink, assume she's also driving.

Elimidate
 

Nicholas Hill

Master Don Juan
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#10
Added to the DJ Bible, nice to see another post good for the clubbing section.

Well done,
Nick
 

toot86

Senior Don Juan
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#11
interesting

I kinda do the same things posted in this guide .. I had a problem girls were just leaving me like i did something so i asked the djs in the main board.. And they said i was a pervert to be grabbing soo soon .. But why does your guide state otherwise?
 

killerasp

Master Don Juan
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#13
Turn to them and say "alright"

What the hell, how does that work? what ever happened to the "Hi".
 

Zelemont

Master Don Juan
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#14
I was dancing like a camp Ricky Martin on ecstasy in a gay club.
AHAHHA that is hilarious!!!!
 
Joined
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#15
Turn to them and say "alright"

What the hell, how does that work? what ever happened to the "Hi".

Ya killerasp, u gotta realise this dude's British. Trust me this is perfectly normal in the UK, by not universalisable. "Hi" is obviously better in North America.

I'm new to this board, but not to clubs. I'm sure many of you have noticed how girls are much more flirtatious at clubs. This does not, however, mean that they're all skanks. Most girls would definately find part 2 of your method overbearing and a big turn-off, especially because they will likely have friends nearby to criticise them for letting you get your feels.

I know your method would be successful sometimes, but for the most part, you're ****ing yourself. Moreover, if she is down, she might be regretting it by the time you call her.

Like the guy said... less equals more.

Big up on part one though.
 
Joined
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#16
WOW! what a tip. i haven't felt the need to post since i joined here, but i must say that this is one of the best things i've ever read. I've gave up going to clubs a few months ago for the same resons you did, but this has inspired me to get back out there. thanks alot, really.
 

Oscar Wilde

Master Don Juan
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#17
Funny how you can tell he's a brit after reading the 1st 2 paragraphs ... I find the brit tips are much more relevant to Ireland than the US ones are too, we don't have the formal "dating" culture over here either (I'm glad: it sounds horrendously slow and painful).

Oscar.
 

MrWilly

Don Juan
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Feb 22, 2003
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#18
Class! ce post, pissing myself laughing at some stuff, especially when thinking "right, yanks are gunna be reading this, lol!"...top stuff from a fellow brit :D

As ive mentioned before the UK scene is VERY different to the US stuff, so I really enjoyed reading this post, as it makes sense, unlike some of the US posts that dont...due to the "dating culture".

Lads, "alrite", its basiclly an abrivated "hiya, how are you?" used here in the UK, jus one of them things, nice lil opener :). (and probbaly the most used word in my vocabulary ;))

I agree with Oscar, readin some of the US posts, the "formality" of "dates" etc etc make me piss myself sometimes, sod that ;)...
 

Rev

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#19
Actually, this seems almost identicle to my club-style.

Who to go with

I've done quite well going alone but there is the added pressure of making sure noone notices you standing there doing nothing but watching. The main difference is you can't get settled in and get comfy with the enviroment with your buddies. You have to jump right in and dance or chat.

Appearance

Of course. Just take notice of what the suave looking guys are wearing. Personally, I think collared shirts are Beta.


Drink?

Hehe. I love the Brits. They understand the social value of alcohol. It can absolutely free you of your inhibitions. Careful not to get to drunk though or you'll cockblock yourself, from one who knows. :)

Dancing

I used to swear I would never dance. Now I dance my ass off and peacock like crazy. It didn't even take much practice at all. Literally a few minutes every now and then. I swear I'm an awsome dancer now and sexy as hell. ;)

I would add:

I pretty much just grab them and pull them to me. You'd be surprised by the delighted looks on their faces 90-50% of the time. :D This is inconsistent, though, and if you start out your night with a rejection this way, you might as well find a new club.

The other night I saw a group of 4 chicks and a dude (one of their BFs I think) and one chick was trying to urge one of the other group members to dance but noone would. I quickly grabbed her and pulled her out on the floor and started spinning and dipping her (So, you wanta dance, huh ;)). We did some grinding too. It seemed all to easy at the time.

BTW, a simple way to look more like Justin Timberlake or whoever (I hate that little queer) is to just stick out your shoulders to the front with your arms straight and relaxed and your hands meeting. Then you can just bend your knees with your feet planted and actually look pretty descent. Seriously.

Approaches

The point is to just be aggressively confident. I just go up and say something with a tone that is nothing short of patronizing. It doesn't even matter what you say because right away she'll be asking you questions about the same bullshyt anyway ("What do you do?", "Where're you from?") Of course, bust her balls and kino her with every answer, but that's just common sense ;)

The “Classic” approach

Don't think I've ever used this one. Sounds more suited for guys with mustashes wearing turtlenecks (LOL).

Now you’re dancing with the girl!

Oh yeah, the liberties I've taken on dance floors. Sometimes, in retrospect, I can't even believe myself what I've gotten away with. :D

Good times for all!
5 Stars *****
 
Joined
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#20
Re: Re: The ultimate CLUB guide

Originally posted by Rev


BTW, a simple way to look more like Justin Timberlake or whoever (I hate that little queer) is to just stick out your shoulders to the front with your arms straight and relaxed and your hands meeting. Then you can just bend your knees with your feet planted and actually look pretty descent. Seriously.
That made no sense at all. Honestly, how does that work dude?
 
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