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The divorced woman on a rebound?

Jacob40

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I need some advice as a newbie here, 49yo as I'm still new to this game. I've been placed in the friend zone too often. Met a 49yo woman from another state about 4 hours away from me on OLD. She came down to see me, since her parents live down here. We only met for an hour and half that day, since I had to go back to work. Been texting and speaking over phone for past two weeks. Video called twice. She told her mom about me and said I looked attractive, which is a first for me. She is "ok" for 49, but still only about 5 or 6/10. She takes care of her looks for what is left for that age.

The issue is she has some drama going on. She is in the stages of going through a divorce. She moved from another state to where she is now to get away from her husband. On one call, she mentioned how unhappy she was in her marriage. She referred to him in one phone call several times to me, as her "soon to be ex". She does most of the talking in the calls and I have trouble getting in any words, as she likes to talk over me some times.

I haven't been initiating much at all, since one night she told me she was too busy and too tired to talk. So I went NC on her and then after three days, she reached out to me, and we started chatting again.

In her OLD profile, she mentions she is looking for someone that would like to move to where she lives. In no way in hell, am I looking to move at all from my state, but wouldn't mind a weekend FWB if it comes down to that. She lives in a small rural town and says there are not many people on OLD there and said the guys that she sees online are ugly. This morning, she sends me a text, about inviting me up to see her on a weekend. I told her my work keeps me busy but I'd think about it.

I thought to myself, I wouldn't mind just going on a road trip up there to get the hell out of town due to covid. So after awhile, I asked her if she knew of any good lodging up there. She then offered her guestroom, and then started sending me photos of it, her bedroom, and outside her house. I find this strange since she had only met me in person for one hour. She seems to have her life together, and has a rewarding job. But something makes me pause. She then sends a photo of a lake and park nearby, and asked if I would want to take a walk with her, if I come up there.

Sounds like she is on a rebound and wants someone to keep her company or give her validation. Any thoughts?
 

ThisIsSparta

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She then offered her guestroom, and then started sending me photos of it, her bedroom, and outside her house. I find this strange since she had only met me in person for one hour. She seems to have her life together, and has a rewarding job. But something makes me pause. She then sends a photo of a lake and park nearby, and asked if I would want to take a walk with her, if I come up there.
Where is the issue with all of that?
 

OldComeBacker

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I've had plenty of women offer me their guest room, their room, even their house, before we ever met.
 

Bigpapa

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I need some advice as a newbie here, 49yo as I'm still new to this game. I've been placed in the friend zone too often. Met a 49yo woman from another state about 4 hours away from me on OLD. She came down to see me, since her parents live down here. We only met for an hour and half that day, since I had to go back to work. Been texting and speaking over phone for past two weeks. Video called twice. She told her mom about me and said I looked attractive, which is a first for me. She is "ok" for 49, but still only about 5 or 6/10. She takes care of her looks for what is left for that age.

The issue is she has some drama going on. She is in the stages of going through a divorce. She moved from another state to where she is now to get away from her husband. On one call, she mentioned how unhappy she was in her marriage. She referred to him in one phone call several times to me, as her "soon to be ex". She does most of the talking in the calls and I have trouble getting in any words, as she likes to talk over me some times.

I haven't been initiating much at all, since one night she told me she was too busy and too tired to talk. So I went NC on her and then after three days, she reached out to me, and we started chatting again.

In her OLD profile, she mentions she is looking for someone that would like to move to where she lives. In no way in hell, am I looking to move at all from my state, but wouldn't mind a weekend FWB if it comes down to that. She lives in a small rural town and says there are not many people on OLD there and said the guys that she sees online are ugly. This morning, she sends me a text, about inviting me up to see her on a weekend. I told her my work keeps me busy but I'd think about it.

I thought to myself, I wouldn't mind just going on a road trip up there to get the hell out of town due to covid. So after awhile, I asked her if she knew of any good lodging up there. She then offered her guestroom, and then started sending me photos of it, her bedroom, and outside her house. I find this strange since she had only met me in person for one hour. She seems to have her life together, and has a rewarding job. But something makes me pause. She then sends a photo of a lake and park nearby, and asked if I would want to take a walk with her, if I come up there.

Sounds like she is on a rebound and wants someone to keep her company or give her validation. Any thoughts?
 

2Rocky

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Take the discussion Seksual and go sow your oats. Don't expect a long term relationship and have some fun.

I've had a good time meeting in a neutral vacation location for a weekend fling where nobody knows you...
 

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Lookatu

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I need some advice as a newbie here, 49yo as I'm still new to this game.

Met a 49yo woman from another state about 4 hours away from me on OLD.

She is "ok" for 49, but still only about 5 or 6/10.

The issue is she has some drama going on.

In her OLD profile, she mentions she is looking for someone that would like to move to where she lives. In no way in hell, am I looking to move at all from my state

Any thoughts?
You are too thirsty and desperate my friend. You can do way better than exert this much effort and thought into a washed up 49yo that's only a 5/6 that gives you medium interest and that is still going through a divorce.

What exactly about her makes her worthy of your attention and effort besides her pvssy? You do know there are better, younger, closer pvssy around, right?
 

Jacob40

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You are too thirsty and desperate my friend. You can do way better than exert this much effort and thought into a washed up 49yo that's only a 5/6 that gives you medium interest and that is still going through a divorce.

What exactly about her makes her worthy of your attention and effort besides her pvssy? You do know there are better, younger, closer pvssy around, right?
The better , younger closer pvssy around me seem to be all taken. I'm not a jacked up athletic guy so I can't compete with those around me. Over a year ago I posted about a younger, divorced, crazy 43yo that I met and then she put me in a friend zone while fvcking other guys. Haven't heard from her since. I'd go for a 20-30 something if I could get one.
 

Sir FB

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You are too thirsty and desperate my friend. You can do way better than exert this much effort and thought into a washed up 49yo that's only a 5/6 that gives you medium interest and that is still going through a divorce.

What exactly about her makes her worthy of your attention and effort besides her pvssy? You do know there are better, younger, closer pvssy around, right?
Just curious. How old are you?
 

BackInTheGame78

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Where is the issue with all of that?
This sounds like an issue to OP because he is used to being friendzoned and doesn't know that women will move fast with a guy they want to fvck. I don't really see anything strange about this.

OP let me tell you about a plate I have been dating about a month and a half now. Lives about an hour and a half away, she came up and spent a Saturday with me and stayed the night after I only met her once previously for about an hour and a half at a halfway point. I went down to her place the weekend before last and stayed the night and she is coming up here this weekend again. We fvck like rabbits...3 or 4 times each time we get together.

There is nothing weird about any of this OP. You simply are not used to women showing sexual interest in you and making it easy for you, which is what they do in those situations.
 

Lookatu

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The better , younger closer pvssy around me seem to be all taken. I'm not a jacked up athletic guy so I can't compete with those around me. Over a year ago I posted about a younger, divorced, crazy 43yo that I met and then she put me in a friend zone while fvcking other guys. Haven't heard from her since. I'd go for a 20-30 something if I could get one.
Start taking care of yourself by working out and eating right. When I say young, I'm not talking about 20-30, it could be just a few years younger. Most women these days will not go out with a guy a few years older than her unless he's also younger looking.

Look for women closer to you and only put in the effort for women that deserves it(looks, personality, reciprocation, equal investment).

Women are going to know how desperate you are if you're willing to drive over an hour to see them and give them all this attention through texting and talking on the phone. It will turn them off and they'll know they can take advantage of you. Especially the older women are masters at resource extraction. That's all they do.
 

2Rocky

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never say whoa in a horserace....

You can be an escape for her. If you want to really see what her intent is, Propose a weekend together sharing a hotel room/ Air BNB halfway between the two of you where there is nobody either of you know.

Issues with going to her house include Nosy neighbors, Kids, Exes or friends "stopping by", running into people she knows while out to dinner/drinks and having to answer to "who is this?"

If you can't swing the financial end of a getaway date like that , don't date distant women.
 

Jacob40

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never say whoa in a horserace....

You can be an escape for her. If you want to really see what her intent is, Propose a weekend together sharing a hotel room/ Air BNB halfway between the two of you where there is nobody either of you know.

Issues with going to her house include Nosy neighbors, Kids, Exes or friends "stopping by", running into people she knows while out to dinner/drinks and having to answer to "who is this?"

If you can't swing the financial end of a getaway date like that , don't date distant women.
We are actually meeting up at a festival. It's two hours away from her, and four hours drive for me. Then she said we could drive back to her place and I could stay in her guest room. That all sounds ok. Until today, she asked if I wanted to go to Church in the morning before we go to the festival! She found a Church in the same city and wants me to go with her to mass! I'm thinking she is super religious now! Before she said that, I had told her I was just going to wear shorts or jeans to this festival. She says she always dresses up and asked if I had any Khaki pants to wear. Who wears dress pants or dresses up for a hot outdoor festival? She has pictures of herself on her dating profile in jeans. But claims she hardly wears jeans.
 

BillyPilgrim

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We are actually meeting up at a festival. It's two hours away from her, and four hours drive for me. Then she said we could drive back to her place and I could stay in her guest room. That all sounds ok. Until today, she asked if I wanted to go to Church in the morning before we go to the festival! She found a Church in the same city and wants me to go with her to mass! I'm thinking she is super religious now! Before she said that, I had told her I was just going to wear shorts or jeans to this festival. She says she always dresses up and asked if I had any Khaki pants to wear. Who wears dress pants or dresses up for a hot outdoor festival? She has pictures of herself on her dating profile in jeans. But claims she hardly wears jeans.
Have you sexually flirted with her? Pic exchange? Did you Kino when you met? It soulds like she could very well be super-serious about a relationship.
 

2Rocky

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I remember in college there was a hot Barrel racer I wanted to bed down...She invited me to breakfast and church with her family one Sunday. I thought I was in...

Then I found out she got drunk and spent the night with one of the bull riders the night before.

You say and LTR is out of the question and that is the direction she is taking it. Weekend rendezvous don't involve guest rooms and church services. Danger Will Robinson....
 

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Jacob40

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Have you sexually flirted with her? Pic exchange? Did you Kino when you met? It soulds like she could very well be super-serious about a relationship.
Kino, a little during first meet. Sent a couple pics last night. This morning she sends me a message that seeing my photos made her more interested in me. Should I respond back about her pics or just play it cool?

I'm wondering if it's all just because of her separation and pending divorce. She has not told me much except she was not happy in it. She still has in her OLD profile that she would like to find someone to move where she is. I have in my profile that I prefer my current location, and not looking to move to another state. I have a good job here and my type of work and large company I work for, isn't available in her state. She lives out in the boondocks.
 

Jacob40

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I remember in college there was a hot Barrel racer I wanted to bed down...She invited me to breakfast and church with her family one Sunday. I thought I was in...

Then I found out she got drunk and spent the night with one of the bull riders the night before.

You say and LTR is out of the question and that is the direction she is taking it. Weekend rendezvous don't involve guest rooms and church services. Danger Will Robinson....
I don't mind a LTR, but a long distance relationship and if she is looking for someone to move to her state, that is out of the question. But I'll see how it goes this weekend. She shouldn't be expecting someone to move in with her on a first or second date. Maybe backing off on giving her attention and keep looking elsewhere in my area would be good?
 

2Rocky

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1) always be looking
2) In an LDR, Sex has to be in the forefront. Otherwise you just have a penpal.
3) She is rebounding. Casting off her limitations from the previous commitment. This is as wild as you will ever find her.
4) She is Rebounding, the early bounces go high, but she will come back to earth. There is gonna be some unstable emotional highs and lows.
5) If you go through with this weekend you will either spend the night alone in her guest room or have a wild sex filled weekend. To me her words say 9-1 chance that you aren't getting laid. You have to ask yourself if you are happy with those odds...
 

Howiestern

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Start pushing the boundaries with your conversations to see how she responds sexually. If she is good with it, then go spend a wknd. and stay at her place.

Stop thinking so much, ride the waves, and have some fun. That's all she really needs/wants right now and you can be that guy.

Be aware of your issues with why you have been put in the friend zone before. If you don't change your approach you'll end up there again with a woman that sounds pretty easy. You come across as super analytical, that mindset will always be a hurdle to success with women and its a turnoff.
 

Jacob40

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I drove to the next state to visit her. About a four hour drive. It went well. We went to a festival, she was very aggressive and before I even reached out to her hand, she grabbed mine to walk around with me. She was super interested in knowing more about me. We went back to her place, we kissed and made out. But she put me up in her guest room overnight. Left the next day.

We've been texting and video calling each other the last two weeks. We made plans to see each other this weekend again, and I'm driving up to her again. She's officially divorced now. She's been very playful in chat. Today she outright asked if I wanted to sleep with her this time. She sent me pics of a new leopard print outfit and other sexy night clothes. She even asked if I liked G-strings and sent me a pic of a new pair she just bought.

Tonight before she went to bed, she did a full 360. She said she wants to take it slow and doesn't want to chase me away. If she's going to attempt to put me in a guest room again, I'm going to head home. Not going to play these games with an older woman. Either she is DTF or not.
 
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