Social competition

Fruitbat

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I have middle class and working class friends. Whenever I meet the MC friends, most of them discuss things in a socially competitive way. It’s constant “this is what I’ve achieved, doing, how much I have” etc. Always dropping things in out of context.

i do ok for myself and I’ve never felt the urge to rub it in others noses. Even things like selecting a drink, it has to be the right drink, the right mixer, it’s all a big status and class show. What happened to just having a beer with your friends?

once you get past this, I can still have some fun times, I just get a little bored with the whole ego thing .

I refuse to play but it seems like I have nothing to add. I have lots going on, I just can’t be bothered playing that game.

any tips on how to avoid and handle these discussions?
 
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AttackFormation

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Tell them what you think or find a different crowd, what else could you do?
 

sexymanman

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go out by yourself and actually have all types of women from all sorts of backgrounds show attraction in you.
 

TyTe`EyEz

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Most people go their entire lives without questioning a lick. Fvcking fags

The fact that you even notice sh1t like this means you're smart, and above the crowd.

There aren't many people like you. Get used to a lonely life. Intellectually, at least.

Welcome to the club!
 
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lamath

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I have middle class and working class friends. Whenever I meet the MC friends, most of them discuss things in a socially competitive way. It’s constant “this is what I’ve achieved, doing, how much I have” etc. Always dropping things in out of context.

i do ok for myself and I’ve never felt the urge to rub it in others noses. Even things like selecting a drink, it has to be the right drink, the right mixer, it’s all a big status and class show. What happened to just having a beer with your friends?

once you get past this, I can still have some fun times, I just get a little bored with the whole ego thing .

I refuse to play but it seems like I have nothing to add. I have lots going on, I just can’t be bothered playing that game.

any tips on how to avoid and handle these discussions?

Got some friend in the corporate word that does that too, it feels like they are still in HS.

Me idgaf about thier acheivment, they are working for the man and thier only ambition is getting on the top of the latter to.make more.money for someone else.
I work for myself. And do more $$ than most of them
 

Fruitbat

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Got some friend in the corporate word that does that too, it feels like they are still in HS.

Me idgaf about thier acheivment, they are working for the man and thier only ambition is getting on the top of the latter to.make more.money for someone else.
I work for myself. And do more $$ than most of them
haha I’m in the corporate world and they work for themselves. That’s mainly just as a twist of fate. Their job role is client facing and most of those firms work for them selves.

I had 20 mins on how one guys firm had achieved xyz. The way this stuff is said, it’s like point score.

I learned long ago pride is a dangerous thing, because it’s all too easy to lose the lot by a stroke of fate. All success, and failure, is temporary. Also, bragging impresses no one, and purely serves to alienate you from people.
 

stormrider

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Life in the real world is just a re-enactment of high school with kids pretending to be adults....or adults acting like kids. I used to live In San Francisco which is the most elitist white collar city in America. It mostly consists of 30, 40, and 50 year olds going on 15. Literally nobody grows up. When you walk around town, people will literally look at your shoes to see if it matches your outfit. Or look at your phone to see if it’s an iPhone or not.

There is no escaping these people the same way there was no avoiding the douchebags in your high school. It’s part of life.

The movie “American psycho” was a depiction of the San Francisco yuppie. And funnily enough, it’s pretty damn accurate. It really is like that in real life where one guy pulls out a business card and another guy pulls out a better looking business card and suddenly there is tension and resentment. You can’t make this stuff up.

You get sh1tted on for being a loser and hated on for being a winner. There’s no winning with these people. No silver lining.

I’ve just learn to accept that most people are a$$holes.

However, having said all that, there is a way you can disappear everything. You can be in the world and not “of” the world, so to speak.

And that is to have a higher purpose.

You’d be in the room but not really in the room. All the petty ego games people play and melodrama wouldn’t really affect you.

You’d be living in your own reality. And anyone who comes in contact with you just gets pulled into your frame.

This is why purpose is so important. Without it, it would be like being part of a zombie apocalypse. When you don’t have laser focus on something, people will pull you into their petty dramas. But when you are focused, they leave you alone.

Being aimless is actually dangerous. It lets the zombies know that you are part of their reality. Elevate your purpose and suddenly you disappear from their reality.

And I’m not talking about making money or trying to become successful with women either. I’m talking about some type of passionate purpose.

Have you ever noticed whenever you fall for someone new and enter a relationship, everything seems to disappear? Everything becomes background noise. This is because the relationship has become your focus/temporary purpose. However, having your relationship as your main purpose is not sustainable in the long run.

This is a very long answer to a short question. But there are those among us that seem to live in a different and elevated reality. When you engage with them, you get pulled into their frame. You can tell they live their own world. But they are not hiding somewhere in a cave on top of a mountain somewhere. They are living amongst us in the trenches. But they are not affected nor do they engage in petty drama.

When you have a passionate purpose, everything becomes background noise, all the zombified people leave you alone, time becomes timeless, and the Universe literally disappears.

But when you are aimless and lack that passionate purpose, you get sucked into people’s petty dramas. You get pulled back down to the level of everyone else.

In a sense, purpose elevates you and allows you to transcend time/space and everyday reality. You create your own reality. And the people operating on the lower levels leave you alone because they do not see you. Like a lesser being that is unable to notice a higher being.

Passionate purpose raises your frequency vibration and those operating on lower vibrations simply do not interact with you.

You can even be in a crazy environment like San Francisco and not really notice all the games people play with each other. It’s because even though you were in that world, you were not “of it”.
 
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Kotaix

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Man this topic hits home... I should preface the following saying that I set it up on purpose just to see what would happen.

I went tubing in texas with two completely disparate groups of people (at the same time). One group worked for Deloit consulting, all of them talking about politics and their next promotion and how much money they made and yadda yadda yadda yadda. The others were just your average texas rednecks, one of which I found out had just gotten out of prison for bull**** charges. Needless to say they didn't mingle and I was the only one who was interested in bridging that gap. But I didn't. I just hung out with the rednecks and laughed.

Another thing to add: Aaron Clarey says often that when he worked in the banking industry, almost all the people who showed up in flashy cars and had tons of look-at-me items had no money whatsoever and it was all a show. The people who were truly wealthy drove POS cars and you'd never know they were filthy rich.

As for how I handle these situations, I tend to insert chaos into the conversation for my own amusement. I'm perfectly capable of playing their game because I used to be like them, but nowdays I enjoy using that knowledge to subtly **** with their heads. If I can make them question their delusion for one moment, my time was well spent, and I had some fun to boot. They aren't going to invite you around anymore, but that's kind of the point.
 

Black Widow Void

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We all have our own style. Personally, I like to leave them with question marks above their head.
If you really don't care to see them again or get invited out by this crowd, try this.
"Hey ____ (insert name) I noticed that you dress like and order the same drinks as every other conformist around here. What is it that differentiates you from the cattle?"

Either you'll learn something unique about the friend (though probably unlikely) or you'll leave them with the realization that they lack individuality and that you two have too little in common to continue.
 

Fruitbat

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I’m so glad others know this.

issue is, it’s a lonely road.

I really like the part above about higher purpose. I’d be interested to hear examples.

I’ve been working on my personal values, which are: Openness, honesty, integrity, punctuality and cohesion.

openness and honesty cause issues, because often you will say things others don’t like. As an example, I’m strongly in favour of an independent UK (that means pro-brexit) but I am surrounded by pro EU remainers. I’m often provoked into defending my points, and because I have integrity, I either just side step it or argue the point. If I side step, with something like “nobody is going to win this, we all hold our views, let’s concentrate on what we do agree on”, these cvnts keep going....pushing it further. So I either argue and cause a stink, or just fold, which I can’t do.

there’s a lot of people out there who just go along with the dominant view, they know this, but it keeps them safe. That to me, is no life at all.

higher purpose though, I suppose mine is to provide for my fairly poor family. But I feel this isn’t “high” enough. It would be interesting to hear some examples
 

Fruitbat

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Most people go their entire lives without questioning a lick. Fvcking fags

The fact that you even notice sh1t like this means you're smart, and above the crowd.

There aren't many people like you. Get used to a lonely life. Intellectually, at least.

Welcome to the club!
sadly, one of the few guys who “got it”, my best childhood friend, committed suicide a few weeks ago.

at least I can see from here there are others out there.
 

speed dawg

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higher purpose though, I suppose mine is to provide for my fairly poor family. But I feel this isn’t “high” enough. It would be interesting to hear some examples
I've been trying to find mine for years. Very difficult process for some, especially people who think like you do (and I, and many others in this thread obviously).

I suggest you start simple. Find your top 3 talents. Find your top 3 passions. You have identified some values, that's good. I like the number 3, I try to keep everything around that number. Just list these things, don't think too much about it. Try to find where all those ideas intersect.

Hard not to succumb to the cynicism. That's a daily, intentional fight against yourself.
 
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Kotaix

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It def is a lonely road. I've lost most of my friends and few of them still contact me. But I refuse to cower and embrace the groupthink. If someone doesn't like my opinions they can go pound sand. It really is that simple, and when you have that, you are free. They are not, they have to tow the line or be ostracized; and if you constantly care about what other people think of you, you'll never be free.

@Fruitbat you should read Mastery by Robert Greene. It's specifically about finding your purpose.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Play along.

Pretend like you are trying to outdo them, but do it with purposely lame things.

Like brag about how you just got a brand new library card or something.

And you can check out books anytime you want.

For free.
Does it deflate them? They attempt to play their games to troll you and get on your energy level. Knocking you off.
 

Trump

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I have middle class and working class friends. Whenever I meet the MC friends, most of them discuss things in a socially competitive way. It’s constant “this is what I’ve achieved, doing, how much I have” etc. Always dropping things in out of context.

i do ok for myself and I’ve never felt the urge to rub it in others noses.
That’s where you are wrong.

If you get, you have to give. Otherwise it will bother you. Same reason you made the thread.

Even things like selecting a drink, it has to be the right drink, the right mixer, it’s all a big status and class show. What happened to just having a beer with your friends?
Are you kidding? Every chance to get together with friends is a chance to rub their faces in it and make them jealous.

Everyone will look for your weakness and attack it relentlessly.

Do you guys not experience life?

once you get past this, I can still have some fun times, I just get a little bored with the whole ego thing .
You mean you get a little “annoyed” with the whole ego thing.

I refuse to play but it seems like I have nothing to add.
Well then get something to add.

I have lots going on, I just can’t be bothered playing that game.
If everyone is playing poker at the table, you have to play poker. To say “I get jealous when you guys play poker, let’s play BJ.” Ridiculous. You have to go with the flow. Adapt. Read. Educate yourself.

You have to be so smart, they say “don’t mess with him, he is a sharp guy.”
 

Fruitbat

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That’s where you are wrong.

If you get, you have to give. Otherwise it will bother you. Same reason you made the thread.



Are you kidding? Every chance to get together with friends is a chance to rub their faces in it and make them jealous.

Everyone will look for your weakness and attack it relentlessly.

Do you guys not experience life?



You mean you get a little “annoyed” with the whole ego thing.



Well then get something to add.



If everyone is playing poker at the table, you have to play poker. To say “I get jealous when you guys play poker, let’s play BJ.” Ridiculous. You have to go with the flow. Adapt. Read. Educate yourself.

You have to be so smart, they say “don’t mess with him, he is a sharp guy.”
Issue is DT, some would prefer their own company.

if you have this relationship with friends, how can you trust them and what is the point of the friendship?

if it’s about one-upmanship and rubbing people’s noses in it, what happens if you get a wasting disease or your child dies, or you are wrongfully convicted, or any number of things? People obsessed with this dynamic would have a little smirk on their faces as you piss yourself or weep for your bad luck.

someone who rejoices when your business fails isn’t a friend, it’s ah enemy. I’d rather keep away from enemies who are in this dynamic with you.

life is a more mature experience than one upmanship. It’s the lowest tier of human experience. Some people, believe it or not, get more fulfilment out of helping people than driving a top end BMW. I could afford a really nice car but don’t choose to. I did once, I found it did nothing for my life, other than give slightly better prestige with the people described. So I’m winning acclaim with people who would be happy in my downfall.

perhaps I’m finding my higher purpose, to achieve success for those around me while shunning and opting out of the backstabbing.

I remember, before I achieved success I thought like you Trump, once you’ve had it and been able to live the life, you find what’s waiting for you isn’t what you expected.
 
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