Glassguy
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- Apr 25, 2016
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I had an interesting PM message convo with @flowtheory .
Not to go into the specific details , but some questions he asked me got me thinking about tests and how I handle them.
First let me say that I dont get that many tests. If I do, typically I dont pay much attention to them.
We all know (or should know) why a woman tests:
1.) She wants to test your frame
2.) She senses that you are an alpha (or at least not full blown beta) and wants you to validate it through her "tests".
3.) Her interest is on the fence as you being a sexual partner and she wants to see how you handle these tests to validate yourself.
This is where I really had to think about one very important thing that I do that puts me into a position of an evening stronger frame than I already have when dealing with "shyte tests".
Are you ready?
I don't acknowledge them as tests. If she asks me a question she gets an honest answer. Dont like it? Ok I'll move on to the next chick. Period. I truly dont care if I pass them in her eyes or not. At all. Why? Because I am not out there dating and holding a rotation to validate myself to these women. And to build a solid rotation, relationship, etc. AND keep them coming back, THEY have to validate themselves to you and not the other way around.
I ignore their tests. Maybe not intentionally, but subconsciously I truly dont care.
And the most important point I want to make:
The minute you care about passing her tests, you ready failed it. When you start feeling as if you have to validate yourself to anyone, you now hold less power in the relationship (any relationship) and guess what? You are now in HER frame instead of her choosing to be in your frame.
The minute the outcome of her test changed your priorities, agenda, you have to sell her on why you do what you do, etc., you failed the test. Because you just told her that she can have control over what you do. Period.
When you have an abundance mindset and you truly dont care, they will literally become chicks who you cant run off.
Why? Because you are totally outcome indifferent about the tests.
When you even start thinking about being someone other than who you really are, doing what you truly like doing or show her that she even has some control of you and what you do as a man, you put her on a pedestal. And you failed her test.
Example: recently a woman said to me: "can't you just skip this one golf tournament to hang out with me Saturday morning"?
Me: nope. You know I like playing golf. That wont change. If its a deal breaker, so be it. If you cant wait till Sunday to get together, just let me know.
Her: well of course I know you like playing golf. I can't wait to see you Sunday even though I'd like to see you sooner.
She didnt ask me that WANTING me to skip a golf tournament to sit around with her. She just wanted to see if I would do it....and I didnt.
Shyte test passed with flying colors because I did what makes ME happy and didnt even consider her little test.
Women want a man who stands true to who he is and does what makes HIM happy. That's why you read on here to invite a chick to something you are already going to do with or without her. You are bringing her into your frame and dont even know it.
The minute you even care about passing her test, you already failed it. Read that again. And again. Altering you, your agenda or your purpose to acknowledge her test means you ready failed it.
How do you always pass the test is : not caring about the outcome, staying true to yourself and who you are first and foremost. By doing that you ALWAYS pass the test. Maybe not with her, but within yourself. Chicks come and go. Your standards and frame shouldn't.
A woman that sees this type of frame will lust for you. Guaranteed.
When you even care about shyte tests and outcomes, you already failed the test and now you're in her frame. That never ends well.
Just my perspective.
Not to go into the specific details , but some questions he asked me got me thinking about tests and how I handle them.
First let me say that I dont get that many tests. If I do, typically I dont pay much attention to them.
We all know (or should know) why a woman tests:
1.) She wants to test your frame
2.) She senses that you are an alpha (or at least not full blown beta) and wants you to validate it through her "tests".
3.) Her interest is on the fence as you being a sexual partner and she wants to see how you handle these tests to validate yourself.
This is where I really had to think about one very important thing that I do that puts me into a position of an evening stronger frame than I already have when dealing with "shyte tests".
Are you ready?
I don't acknowledge them as tests. If she asks me a question she gets an honest answer. Dont like it? Ok I'll move on to the next chick. Period. I truly dont care if I pass them in her eyes or not. At all. Why? Because I am not out there dating and holding a rotation to validate myself to these women. And to build a solid rotation, relationship, etc. AND keep them coming back, THEY have to validate themselves to you and not the other way around.
I ignore their tests. Maybe not intentionally, but subconsciously I truly dont care.
And the most important point I want to make:
The minute you care about passing her tests, you ready failed it. When you start feeling as if you have to validate yourself to anyone, you now hold less power in the relationship (any relationship) and guess what? You are now in HER frame instead of her choosing to be in your frame.
The minute the outcome of her test changed your priorities, agenda, you have to sell her on why you do what you do, etc., you failed the test. Because you just told her that she can have control over what you do. Period.
When you have an abundance mindset and you truly dont care, they will literally become chicks who you cant run off.
Why? Because you are totally outcome indifferent about the tests.
When you even start thinking about being someone other than who you really are, doing what you truly like doing or show her that she even has some control of you and what you do as a man, you put her on a pedestal. And you failed her test.
Example: recently a woman said to me: "can't you just skip this one golf tournament to hang out with me Saturday morning"?
Me: nope. You know I like playing golf. That wont change. If its a deal breaker, so be it. If you cant wait till Sunday to get together, just let me know.
Her: well of course I know you like playing golf. I can't wait to see you Sunday even though I'd like to see you sooner.
She didnt ask me that WANTING me to skip a golf tournament to sit around with her. She just wanted to see if I would do it....and I didnt.
Shyte test passed with flying colors because I did what makes ME happy and didnt even consider her little test.
Women want a man who stands true to who he is and does what makes HIM happy. That's why you read on here to invite a chick to something you are already going to do with or without her. You are bringing her into your frame and dont even know it.
The minute you even care about passing her test, you already failed it. Read that again. And again. Altering you, your agenda or your purpose to acknowledge her test means you ready failed it.
How do you always pass the test is : not caring about the outcome, staying true to yourself and who you are first and foremost. By doing that you ALWAYS pass the test. Maybe not with her, but within yourself. Chicks come and go. Your standards and frame shouldn't.
A woman that sees this type of frame will lust for you. Guaranteed.
When you even care about shyte tests and outcomes, you already failed the test and now you're in her frame. That never ends well.
Just my perspective.