Confidence. To be confident. You're confident when you and your subconscious mind know you can accomplish your goal. Problems arise when you do not set a goal. Since you step into the dark when you do not set a goal. And the automatic response of your subconscious mind is to stop you in your tracks. All kinds of excuses will follow as a result. This is for your own protection since you're going to do something that has no clear goal, and therefor no clear outcome.
Experiences, successful and unsuccessful ones, will give you a realistic view of your abilities. You know what you are capable of. The only thing you'll have to do is set a goal. Keep the goal realistic and take it only moments before action. This way the outcome is best.
Let me give an example:
What not to do:
You see this gorgeous girl. You observe her and see that she is constantly surrounded by friends and approached by men. You start thinking how you could approach her. Considering she gets a lot of attention it has to be pretty damn good. It takes pretty long before you come up with the perfect line. And by now she has moved to the dance floor. This is not good because you need to change your tactic. You only focus on her but it seems kind of hopeless, she probably has a larger than life *****shield, and you don't want to be shutdown before all those people watching. Too much effort anyway.
What to do:
You see this gorgeous girl. You look at her and decide she is interesting. You set your goal: "approach her within 2 minutes, no matter what". Nothing to lose, all to gain. You know what you can do, since you've been in this exact same situation multiple times, and know it never turns out bad for you. You might get shut down but that doesn't hurt a man like you, at least you tried. Where others were making up the perfect line. Time for action. You open her and it's on (kino, fun). You have accomplished your goal and feel the confidence growing.
In short set a realistic goal, take action, accomplish your goal. And you will feel great for being true to yourself. Confidence is only gained by success. Success can only be gained by action. And action is gained by letting your mind know the consequence, automatically removing the blocks.
Experiences, successful and unsuccessful ones, will give you a realistic view of your abilities. You know what you are capable of. The only thing you'll have to do is set a goal. Keep the goal realistic and take it only moments before action. This way the outcome is best.
Let me give an example:
What not to do:
You see this gorgeous girl. You observe her and see that she is constantly surrounded by friends and approached by men. You start thinking how you could approach her. Considering she gets a lot of attention it has to be pretty damn good. It takes pretty long before you come up with the perfect line. And by now she has moved to the dance floor. This is not good because you need to change your tactic. You only focus on her but it seems kind of hopeless, she probably has a larger than life *****shield, and you don't want to be shutdown before all those people watching. Too much effort anyway.
What to do:
You see this gorgeous girl. You look at her and decide she is interesting. You set your goal: "approach her within 2 minutes, no matter what". Nothing to lose, all to gain. You know what you can do, since you've been in this exact same situation multiple times, and know it never turns out bad for you. You might get shut down but that doesn't hurt a man like you, at least you tried. Where others were making up the perfect line. Time for action. You open her and it's on (kino, fun). You have accomplished your goal and feel the confidence growing.
In short set a realistic goal, take action, accomplish your goal. And you will feel great for being true to yourself. Confidence is only gained by success. Success can only be gained by action. And action is gained by letting your mind know the consequence, automatically removing the blocks.