Retribution or Forgiveness?

[Cableguy]

Hey fellas, I had something happen to me today and I'm curious how others would handle it.

I went to Mickey D's this morning to get some breakfast. I arrive in my work truck and curse when I see that it's packed. I go in, and stand in a sea of hungry people, patiently awaiting my turn. I get up to the counter, order my bacon,egg,and cheese biscuit and sweet tea, then file to another part of the counter where people were picking up their food. Then it happened.

This vile and disgusting employee behind the counter notices my company's name on my hoodie (I work for the type of company that people either love or hate), and proceeds to unabashedly trash my company. She was loud and obnoxious about it too. Even had another employee agreeing with her. They are on the clock, mind you. People were staring at me, some happily, while others, sympathetic to my plight.

Now, what I wanted to do was jump over that counter and baptize that bytches misshapen dome in the deep fryer, but I don't think I'd like prison. What I did do was ask for the manager, who turned out to be none other than little miss McShytypants' accomplice. Knowing the crime committed against me would go unpunished, I asked for the owner/operator's number. I could tell by the look on their faces they knew they had fvcked up. They could tell by mine I was not in my happy place.

After a superfluous apology from the manager (the whole time I'm talking to the manager little miss McFishbritches is glaring at me, even gave me the stink eye) I went out to my truck, ate my absolutely terrible biscuit, and tried to process what had just happened. I mean, am I the only sane sumbytch in this world? Is it normal to be attacked by an employee of the business you are choosing to do business with? Without provocation? Others didn't think so. I had a couple of carpenter dudes come up and give me their cell numbers in case I wanted to sue and needed witnesses. Too bad I'm not litigious.

I called the owner and got his voicemail. I left a brief message that I would like for him to please call me. About an hour later he calls me back and I tell him what happened and I can tell you this, he was NOT happy. I also told him I had witnesses who were there and could corroborate my story. He apologized profusely and mentioned that this had not been little miss McFvckfaces' first complaint. He assured me he would handle it.

I have been going to this McD on occasion for probably five years. This chick has been there at least that long. I remember seeing her a LONG time ago working there. I remember because she quite possibly may be the ugliest chick I have ever seen in my life. Her tenure there leads me to believe this may be her career path, and it may be over because of me.

I'm curious to know how some of you guys would have handled this, or maybe a similar situation and how it was resolved. I've had time to calm down now and have come to the conclusion that I handled things the way I feel I should have. I know people who would have torn her apart, and I know people who would have just taken it, giving this chick a reason to believe she can insult customers, people who provide her with a paycheck, with impunity.

 

[Alexander the Great]

Cable, I think you did good. Your question: Retribution or Forgiveness? I don't think you should be reasoning in such distinctions. It's not a matter of forgiving or seeking revenge. The lady in question f*cked up bigtime. Why withhold her the experience of consequences to her actions? It's not retribution what you did. Simply justice IMO.

Forgiving her is something seperate from the lesson she apparently needs to learn. If you feel that by excusing her and thus possibly excusing her from any consequences, she'll never learn. That's not forgiveness for what she did. That would simply be soft. Forgiveness is for when people honestly admit their wrong and you decide it to be be bygones.

Again, I think you did good. No, great. You kept your cool and you stood your ground. I'm not sure I would have asked for the manager and subsequently for the phone number of the owner/operator if I had been faced with such blatant unprofessionalism. It always stuns me that people think such behaviour is acceptable and the opportunity to do something about it is often lost as I struggle to regain my inner composure.

I think I would have been one to simply take it and hate myself afterwards for being a chump and not standing up for myself. "Forgive", in other words. Not a good thing. So, I thank you for showing an example of what could be done if faced with a similar situation.

 

[KontrollerX]

You handled things correctly.

In the heat of the moment most people wouldn't have.

If you have the energy to sue you should do that as well.

Though if the company made a deal to fire her and possibly give you some sort of special year long deal specifically for you of buy one get one free I personally would then let it go but yeah sue away I say unless they offer up a great out of court settlement such as that.

 

[Cableguy]

Thanks guys for your input. It means alot. There is a side of me that could cut a mvtherfvcker's head off and fvck it, without remorse. Then there's the side of me that feels thankful to God Almighty that I'm healthy, successful, and absolutely content with my life. But I can't help but wonder, "maybe she was just having a bad day." Let's face it, the economy sucks right now. I certainly wouldn't want to be in the unemployment line nowadays.

I'm not sorry for the way I handled things. I'm regretful that I was put in a position that forced me to take a stand. I can assure you that I kept my cool, but the rage that burned within me was down right frightening. I hate to say this, and I may lose some respect from some of the hardasses, but it really made me feel like shyt. I don't take kindly to having my fvcking feewins hurt. I'm feeling veclempt... jk

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

Who do you work for and what exactly did she say? It's out of line and obviously this isn't the first time she's done this kind of thing.

 

[vitor]

If you mouthed off to a customer or screwed up what would your boss do? I doubt she will get fired..

 

[godofanxiety]

Haha, she ruined your day, now you'll make her fired.

Talk about taking the head for an eye.

 

[ketostix]

This is where I was getting at in Picard's thread about women and employment-do you think a male manager would keep is job for 5 years who acted like this woman? I agree you handled this right. I don't really think you have cause to sue, but what you could do is call McDonald's corporate. I'm pretty sure they are all franchised and the corporate will probably see that the owner actually does something about these employees.

I don't really see this as retribution vs. forgiveness. This is really about poor female behavior as much as it is about poor customer service. Women need to be held accountable more often and this is a chance to do it.

 

[Colossus]

I think you handled it perfectly. You kept your cool, didn't make a fool out of yourself, and took totally fair measures to deal with the b!tch. If she gets fired, that is HER fault, not yours. It doesn't matter if she works at Mickey D's or a Lexus dealership, that was rude and unprofessional.

You aren't exacting retribution really, she is just getting justice. There are consequences when you pop your mouth off to strangers.

 

[Cableguy]

Thanks eveyone again for your input. The title of my thread came from the battle in my head at the time of whether to really throw this chick under the bus or forgive her for her lunacy. Hence the retribution or forgivness. I know that I value not only my job, but my customers as well. People don't HAVE to do business with my company. They choose to and for that, I reward them the best possible service I can. I expect at the very least a little respect.

It seems to me with jobs getting harder to find, people already gainfully employed would be grateful and appreciative of a steady paycheck. I'm a very laid back dude for the most part. It takes alot to piss me off. I get bad customer service all the time, and I rarely complain and never disrespect the person(s). But to be humiliated and embarrassed in front of so many people when I'm minding my own business was something I never really expected and looking back I'm suprised I handled it as well.

I'm a staunch opponent of frivolous lawsuits. It never crossed my mind to sue or do anything other than give that girl an attitude check. It could be the owner's only daughter for all I know. I will never go to that McD again I know that. I'm not a big fan of boogers in my food.

I'd still like to hear someone else's story about a similar situation and how they handled it.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Cableguy, fwiw, I think you handled it pretty well. IMO, ideally, the best way to handle a situation like that would be to avoid the business and go someplace else. That's the beauty of capitalism. Ideally, the market eventually should correct such behavior, but unfortunately we all know that isn't always the case.

Whenever your are put on spot unexpectedly in a social situation like that, it's tough to have your wits about you. One of the drawbacks to the way you handled it is that by the time the boss gets around to talking to the girl, in her mind the two events won't be connected, so she'll likely not learn anything, and delude herself into thinking she is a victim.

The best way to handle a situation like this, again this is ideal and near impossible to do when you are being called out like you were, is to calmly and methodically turn all her insults back on her through well asked questions.

That way you will slowly shift the attention back on her as she has to explain why she is slamming you so, all the while you maintain your cool and she looks more and more like an idiot while losing hers. AND she'll learn right quick a valuable lesson of cause and effect.

But this is tough when you are merely expecting an egg mcmuffin and get blindsided by some retarded girls tirade.

All in all you did the better than most, who would have either launched an aggressive tirade against, her, or slinked away in shame only later to take it out on somebody else.

One way to learn from this opportunity is to imagine all the insults she said and think of calm responses that would turn the pressure back on her, so you will know deep in your bones you are better equipped to handle crap from women in general, in the future.

 

[Da Realist]

Brush it off and keep walking. You sue and it gets stuck in court for years while you have to pay to keep it going. Plus what are you suing over? Because somebody talked bad about you in public? Do you really want to show this lady even more that it hurt your feelings by taking her to court and actually adding some kind of excitement to her "great" life of working at McDonald's? Trust me, it may seem weak, but best to let her go on because usually what happens is that these folks roll over on folks, get worse each time, and then end up meeting someone who is just as much of a jerk but with a whole lot more power to do something when someone disses them. If you're him, tear her up by all means. But because of the way you handled it, you seem to have a lot more class. So don't worry about it, but probably stay away because she will be the one handling your food.

 

[Cableguy]

Brush it off and keep walking. You sue and it gets stuck in court for years while you have to pay to keep it going. Plus what are you suing over? Because somebody talked bad about you in public? Do you really want to show this lady even more that it hurt your feelings by taking her to court and actually adding some kind of excitement to her "great" life of working at McDonald's? Trust me, it may seem weak, but best to let her go on because usually what happens is that these folks roll over on folks, get worse each time, and then end up meeting someone who is just as much of a jerk but with a whole lot more power to do something when someone disses them. If you're him, tear her up by all means. But because of the way you handled it, you seem to have a lot more class. So don't worry about it, but probably stay away because she will be the one handling your food.

Yeah I feel you. Let me reiterate that I never considered suing them. I was approached by a couple guys who said they would be witnesses if I wanted to sue. I remember thinking at the time how ridiculous a lawsuit would be. If my dad was still alive, he'd kick my ass for doing some **** like that.

 

[Mr. Me]

can't help but wonder, "maybe she was just having a bad day."

Could be, BUT she chose to behave in an inappropriate way.

I'm not sorry for the way I handled things. I'm regretful that I was put in a position that forced me to take a stand... it really made me feel like shyt.

And, unlike Miss McShytNugget, even though now you were having a bad day, YOU chose to conduct yourself in a very upright and appropriate manner. Good for you.

This is part of being a Man. You don't relish having to stand up for yourself, BUT you have NO qualms about doing so when the need arises. You don't wig out to your temperament but keep your cool. You do what you need to do and get the job done.

These are admirable traits, my man.

 

[samspade]

You absolutely did the right thing. People don't go to restaurants to be insulted. Unless the company you work for shipped prisoners to Auschwitz, she should know to keep her mouth shut. Maybe she'll learn now.

I once complained to a manager at a pizzeria that I saw one of his employees come out of a bathroom stall and leave without washing his hands. I had absolutely no compunction whatsoever doing this. It's one thing to rat people out, but why should we tolerate this kind of behavior when we're literally handing our money over to these people?

If she doesn't like being nice to people, even on a bad day, she should work as a freelance software engineer. Much less interaction.

 

[STR8UP]

This is one of those things that shouldn't have enough effect on your life that you would feel the need for either.

I mean, c'mon man....I don't see a problem with contacting the owner. If I was the owner I would DEFINITELY want to know about issues like this. But really...who is this person to get under your skin this much? She probably won't make it much past the fryer at McDonalds.

Awhile back this low class ghetto ho tried to get up in my face at work. It was the opposite scenario- rude, b!tchy, sh!tty ass attitude customer trying to get something for free.

I own the store so I immediately recognized her game, and as soon as she stepped over the line I told her to LEAVE. It's one thing to be accommodating to a customer that has had a bad day, but this chick was having a bad life and taking it out on everyone that crosses her path. I don't need money that bad.

When she asked for the owner's contact info I told her "you are looking at him" which I suppose gave me MY resolution to the situation. I was pretty fired up but even if I hadn't had a way to say "HA!" I would like to think that I would have been able to see that she was nothing more than a miserable human being that had no power over me that I didn't hand over to her willingly.

Forget about her and go to BK next time.

 

[window]

Not only have you done well but you've done the owner a favour as his business will surely improve through better customer service. You've also helped the girl as she'll learn from her mistake (hopefully).

 

[Cableguy]

*UPDATE*

The owner called me a few minutes ago to let me know he had spoken to the employees. They tried to make it sound like I was exaggerating in the details of my story. I reminded the owner that I had witnesses. He told me he had no reason the doubt me.

He asked if there was anything he could do to make things right. I told him as the owner of the business I trusted that he would do what he thought best for his own store. He offered to send me some coupons but I declined. I'm over the whole thing now. I'll never go back to that McD again. As someone else already said, that's the beauty of capitalism.

Thanks again to everyone who weighed in with their thoughts. Samspade, your reply made me laugh. I couldn't help but be reminded of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry sees Popi leave the restroom w/o washing his hands, only to see him a few minutes later with his hands in the dough. "I'ma goin to make a you a something very a special" Haaaaa

 

[mrRuckus]

I don't think having your feelings hurt is a suable offense. Hmm, is suable a word? It says a lot about our society that that many people would tell you you should sue merely because someone said words to you.

 

[Cableguy]

I don't think having your feelings hurt is a suable offense. Hmm, is suable a word? It says a lot about our society that that many people would tell you you should sue merely because someone said words to you.

It does say a lot. People will sue over anything these days. Sad part is this behavior has become the norm for some parts of our population. Always looking for a handout. Combine that with bleeding heart liberal judges willing to rule in anyone's favor who's sueing a business and you have an incentive to file a frivolous lawsuit. Glad I'm not one of them.