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Question on divorce

Fruitbat

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ok so don’t envisage anything - we are happily married and my wife’s culture sees divorce as a terrible thing and she often worries about me “going off with a younger woman when I’m older”

Lol. Quite funny as an older spouse who is a breadwinner to have my much younger and poorer wife be the one worried about divorce!!

Anyhow, I know if there are kids I am not on to a winner if we do ever get divorced, and I may have to help with mortgage until kids are older and hand over money. I get all that.

Is there anything I can do now that can help me not get too shafted if we ever did get divorced?

I’m thinking less paper assets more physical?

Anyone been through a messy divorce and can give tips, I don’t want to do anything drastic like move all my money to an offshore trust, but if there are any tips willing to hear them.
 
A

AJ84

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ok so don’t envisage anything - we are happily married and my wife’s culture sees divorce as a terrible thing and she often worries about me “going off with a younger woman when I’m older”

Lol. Quite funny as an older spouse who is a breadwinner to have my much younger and poorer wife be the one worried about divorce!!

Anyhow, I know if there are kids I am not on to a winner if we do ever get divorced, and I may have to help with mortgage until kids are older and hand over money. I get all that.

Is there anything I can do now that can help me not get too shafted if we ever did get divorced?

I’m thinking less paper assets more physical?

Anyone been through a messy divorce and can give tips, I don’t want to do anything drastic like move all my money to an offshore trust, but if there are any tips willing to hear them.
Your much poorer wife of course doesn’t want to lose your financial resources.

Best way to not be on the hook for 100% supporting someone post divorce is for that someone to have their own decent income.

In Canada I know of two women who had to pay their ex’s because of their decent income.

In theory it may sound great to have the lil misses rely on the breadwinner but that comes back to bite you in the butt in divorce.

Just my two cents.
 

RickTheToad

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Never a good then when a spouse is fishing on the topic of divorce. If you want to safe guard somethings without her signing anything, you can divorce her in the DR or some other country and she doesn't even have to technically know. Then, if she throws it on you, the divorce threat, you would have some security, not much as there's already time in the marriage. Other things would to build an emergency fund in traceable assets such as gold and silver. Then store them in a place that she and no one else knows about. Tough situation dude.

Link:
https://www.legalzoom.com/articles/divorcing-overseas-hot-spots-for-quickie-divorces
 

ubercat

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But DR divorce says the other party must sign a special power of attorney. Which I guarantee has to be witnessed. So basically you would have to fake your wife signature and find at least one person willing to lie for you on a legal document.

so sounds like gold in the backyard is the better way to go. Be really sneaky Vietnamese can sniff out gold like a truffle hound.

Mate I don't know. she is 10 years younger than you and Asian girls age better than euros. Unless she's misbehaving bad I reckon it's a lot cheaper to work on the marriage.
 

Fruitbat

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But DR divorce says the other party must sign a special power of attorney. Which I guarantee has to be witnessed. So basically you would have to fake your wife signature and find at least one person willing to lie for you on a legal document.

so sounds like gold in the backyard is the better way to go. Be really sneaky Vietnamese can sniff out gold like a truffle hound.

Mate I don't know. she is 10 years younger than you and Asian girls age better than euros. Unless she's misbehaving bad I reckon it's a lot cheaper to work on the marriage.
Haha I’m just about to buy a house and panicking a bit.

I have zero reason to worry based on our relationship but I’m just acknowledging things can and will break down. Perhaps it will be my fault and I’ll have a midlife crisis in a few years. Or perhaps she IS my midlife crisis!
 

Fruitbat

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Never a good then when a spouse is fishing on the topic of divorce. If you want to safe guard somethings without her signing anything, you can divorce her in the DR or some other country and she doesn't even have to technically know. Then, if she throws it on you, the divorce threat, you would have some security, not much as there's already time in the marriage. Other things would to build an emergency fund in traceable assets such as gold and silver. Then store them in a place that she and no one else knows about. Tough situation dude.

Link:
https://www.legalzoom.com/articles/divorcing-overseas-hot-spots-for-quickie-divorces
Nah, she’s not really spoken of divorce. More like “you’ll leave me” rather than the D word.

We’ve been married 6 months. In UK you need to be about 10+ years in to even get near 50/50. Once kids are involved it’s different. In fact, kids are probably bigger than marriage in UK law, you can get a monthly payment for years.
 

Fruitbat

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Your much poorer wife of course doesn’t want to lose your financial resources.

Best way to not be on the hook for 100% supporting someone post divorce is for that someone to have their own decent income.

In Canada I know of two women who had to pay their ex’s because of their decent income.

In theory it may sound great to have the lil misses rely on the breadwinner but that comes back to bite you in the butt in divorce.

Just my two cents.
Of course she doesn’t. Or rephrased, she’s got herself a winner and doesn’t want to lose him.

I’m not even wealthy really, not on paper. My family are as poor as it gets, there is no family estate to worry about.

I’m just 10 years older and well established in a career, and a hard worker.

Take your point fully, i was focussed on getting her a business to run and I will keep doing that and make it happen. I’m also considering setting up my own and she can do a role there. Good point
 

ubercat

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Mate undamaged Asian girls r like Bulldogs loyal until death. And they make great Mum's. You've done really well. Chillax, treat her well but keep your balls and enjoy the family life.
 

RickTheToad

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In that case, check with a barrister in the UK to see how you can purchase the home not in your name so your wife cannot grab it. I do not know much about the laws in the UK, but I'd tread very carefully.
 

Roober

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I cant remember the term, but every man should have a stash of cash. Just put a little bit in there every week or month, anything that could easily be written off as cash for coffee, gambling, etc. Do not tell ANYONE where it is.

I used to go to Vegas periodically, and I "gambled" a couple thousand away each time i went, if you catch my drift. Just make your withdrawals with some regularity, like your a coffee fanatic or something, and it wont seem fishy.

Every man should have a cash stash.
 

ubercat

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Haha pay it forward' I got busted. Loyal like bull dogs was Scaramouches bon mot in a pm to me. A lot of what I learnt about acquiring and managing Asian girls was from Scaramouche who is a legend. He is a yellow tuna bus conductor par Excellence thank you my friend and it's fantastic to see you're still here and kicking.
 

ubercat

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One of my friends parents got divorced. She had stolen enough money out of the housekeeping to buy her own place. So think about how long she had been slowly working towards her backup plan and eventually monkey branch. It's true @Fruitbat when it comes to girls the question is not are you paranoid. The question is are you paranoid enough? The slightest ripple can be a sign of hamster Overdrive. Or it could be something she read in Cosmo while getting her nails done. That's the terror and joy of woman. As always in life the smart operators hope for the best and plan for the worst.
 
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