Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Not 5 years ago...this stuff used to be fun...


Senior Don Juan
Nov 19, 2009
Reaction score
Dopaminergic pathways
Kailex said:
TheMessageBoy mentions "being yourself" but isn't "being yourself" what got a LOT of us into trouble in the first place?
You werent being yourself. In fact, you've been everybody except yourself.

(oh my, what a pretty lady. i wanna get to know her. but im scared to go up to her and start a conversation. oh noesssss.)

You and I may have different definitions of "being yourself". To me it means to listen to your gut instinct at all times, because it will never cross you over. Live your life in such a way that you have no regrets later on. Never let your EGO stop you. Yes, it is your EGO crying about getting rejected; yes your EGO will be hurt if you indeed get rejected. (and you will be just fine)

Luthor Rex

Master Don Juan
Jul 16, 2006
Reaction score
the great beyond
backbreaker said:
is this supposed to be a bad thing?

the avg person freaking sucks.t he avg person, not just woman, person has no plans beyond the coming weekend, no ambition, no drive, no savings, are stuck at jobs they don't want, have debt, have no backbone, are afraid to take risks, are afraid to fail and at the same time afraid to succeed, thinks the world owes them something, think it's perfectly fine to get off work and play video games all day/ get online and chat all day, spends their work day on facebook instead of trying to get ahead, and i can go on and on.
I could see how for some people they would see it as a bad thing: you end up alienated from most people around you. I think that would bother a lot of people.

I look at it as part of a filtering process to keep sh!theads out of my life.

It's kind of like if you set a "no drama" rule for yourself. There is the trade-off that you'll end up pushing a lot of women out of your life, but you again have the advantage of keeping the sh!theads out. Honestly, I could see some people saying "you want me to actively push women out of my life? what are you crazy?"


Senior Don Juan
Jul 5, 2010
Reaction score
I think this is simply the way the social conventions are set up right now in America. The sexual marketplace has pussey in general in high demand.

I have a friend who was a BOSS in high school. Great personality, prom king. Just checked his FB page and his girlfriend is absolutely hideous. I mean, vomit hideous. What we have is a small minority of alpha males controlling over 90% of the attractive female population.

That's why they are so stuck up and self-centered. Just think about what kind of attention these women get when they go to walmart, or college, or even just a bookstore. If you think its bad at a party, just picture the everyday, run-of-the-mill things that they do and how much attention and ego-boosting they get, on the DAILY.

It's standard procedure for them. That's why they have the sense of entitlement. Men's value is way down in the dating game. A 9 male and a 9 female are NOT the same. A 9 female, in terms of results, will reap 5X what a 9 male will ever see. This is strange because men are actually the minority gender, with women being 53%


Master Don Juan
Apr 24, 2002
Reaction score
monrovia, CA
lol, and those are the people i don't want to be like. i have nothing in common withs omeone who goes looking for and is okay with excessive drama.

people act like life is this big timeless box. i have **** to do, goals i want to achieve. wasting time with male or female friends that are **** offs, nah.

i actually treat my male friends, or aquetenences alot like plates. i have about 10 guy friends that i would call somewhat friends. i call them or they call me when they want to do something. watch a game, go to the track, go shoot pool. causal friendship. no going out sarging and putting up wtih egos or getting egos broken because she look at me first but she's talking to him ****, no sitting over each others house doing jack **** when i can be doing something constructive.

and again society puts way to much on sex. msot guys are afraid to chase women off in the slight chance one of them might spread their legs one day. so the **** what.


let's take the avg afc guy. afc afc guy is 28 years old, let's say he is now a department manager at best buy. those make about 35-40k a year, i know. "
avg afc guy gets up, goes to work, from 3 to 11 5 days a week. he is off on tuesday and wednesday.

he has 2 friends, one is an accountant and the other is a car salesman.

in his circle of friends there are 5 women, 3 of them are cute. he spends time at work texting them, "neg hitting and flirting" with them. one of the women has nothing to do wednesday night, so they agree to go out as friends to get something to eat. he takes her to a local mexican resturant, then because he hopes to somehow get laid out of all this he suggests that they go "check out this band downtown at the club" (he has no idea who is playing, just doesn't want to go home alone).

Attention ***** girl knows this in the back of her head, but she has nothing better to do. she knows she doesn't want to screw him and won't, regardless of how drunk she gets, but it's better than sitting at home. they go out he ends up dropping about 100 bucks for the entire night, and all he has to show for it is some provocative chat, mainly because she's tipsy. he drops her off at home and goes home to jack off thinking about her.

attention ***** girl really wants to date the accountant guy. he works a normal job and has the best (relativity speaking) future and can provide the best (the car guy sucks at his job).s he goes out with him on saturday ngiht (while best buy guy is at work) and is throwing all types of hints at him. he smashes, then goes and brags to his friends about how he got in her pants.

now best buy guy is jealous. that was his girl. he made the move. she told him that she was not interesting in dating anyone right now, how could she sleep with him and not me? why is he better than me?

he then comes to sosuave and makes a post and spends a few hours debating and defending himself in the process over the week time frame. also develops a "plan" to get her "back"

now they have to have a talk and clear the air. but nothing gets done really, the best buy guy is so insecure and the accountant is so smug (and insecure as well) that they can't get past their insecurities. the attention *****, is still playing them against each other for attention. she has created the perfect boyfriend by combining two different guys. she will talk to him, and cry to him, then **** and live with the other guy when it's all said and done.

i say all that to say, and i can go on and on,

1. how much time in this week period was wasted dealing with these people? how much time did best buy guy waste by taking this attention ***** out, then giving a **** and crying about her when she ****ed someone else.

could his time not be better spend trying to figure out a plan to become the store manager (who makes about 95k a year) at best buy? or working over time to move up in the company? or going to the gym (he doesn't want to be superficial, guys that go to the gym are soo superficial) or learning how to cook something

2. all his friends and him do when they get together is talk about **** that happened at work and how they hate their jobs. my fiancee has this friend named crystal who works for this bloodstock agent, all she does when she comes over is ***** and ***** about her job and her boss. doesn't matter who she works for (she has had 4 jobs since i have known her) she will find something to ***** about. how is this constructive? how is this bettering myself?

3. his two off days are spent talking and texting his friends, then going on a "date" with his 'friend". absolutely nothing comes out of this.

mind you, i blow steam as well just like the next guy does, but only when i have time to blow steam. this guy hasn't done jack **** all week long and thinks he now needs to unwind.

do you know how many times ive picked up guys to go shoot pool (i'm actually quite good) adn their house is a ****ing mess, yet they are ready to go out? what kinda **** is that. or guys who think it's okay to skip the gym, but there is no way i'm missing the party on Saturday night. those are not people i associate with on a normal basis. i've actually, actually quite recently like 2 months ago, went to the gym at 10pm because i could not justify taking my fiancee out to a club, yet not going to the gym.

3. the 100 bucks he spends on this "friend" of his to impress her / get her drunk.. could have been spent alot more constructively.

i have no problem with people doing things to blow off steam. but obviously this guy is not enough of a catch to where she won't screw him. which means, that 100 dollars needs to be invested into him, not spent on her.


Master Don Juan
Jan 3, 2010
Reaction score
New Jersey
J. Darko said:
I understand where you are coming from, but the problem is that the threads on this board no longer support the idea of becoming a better version of ourselves.
I also see where you are coming from, but have you noticed how the last few weeks, the ones posting the most seem to be the ones who've already had success in creating a better them? Look in the Mature Men forum, you hardly see any posts about when to call next or what should they text or whether those IOI's a woman were handing out were real or not.

It's the lack of posts from new usernames and new people that make the board seem almost lopsided. And yet, in the past few weeks, some of the best discussions have happened on this board. Whether I agree with it or not, is a whole different story.

I will agree with the increased negativity as of late in a lot of threads, almost a Pook-ish evolution of sorts.

Instead, the focus is now on being bitter about the lack of self improvement before visiting Sosuave and projecting that bitterness on women and society.

For example, people who told us that we should be ourselves, perhaps meant to say that we should be the best version of ourselves. But we never got that message, that is, until we became a member of this board. Therefor, we shouldn't blame women and society for giving bad advice, but we should blame ourselves for our bad interpretation of the advice thats been given to us.

Second, your point of view that there is only a handful of quality women and calling this 'the ugly truth' is really one sided and typical of the sosuave sub-culture. There's another side you don't see: the women that broke your heart may very well be high quality girls for other guy's and in other times. People change, people improve, you change, you improve, women change, women improve. And be honest, you don't know all women in this world and neither does anyone on this board. It's not valid to claim that most women are low quality. You can't jump to conclusions.
And in this point, you are correct. Most women aren't low quality, they are low quality to ME, and I shouldn't generalize the world by my standards, but the fact remains, they are my standards. My ex could very well be high quality for you, but that doesn't change the fact that I wouldn't want to be with her again.

Maybe when I say "the ugly truth", I should really say "MY ugly truth".

These are just a few examples of all the poorly grounded assumptions you make in this posts. All these so called ''truths'' like being plugged into the Matrix, neg-hits working all the time, women being higher quality in 2005 and having to conform to a marriage paradigm are just overgeneralizations. Your jumping to conclusions based on your own experience and what you read on this board.
Once again, correct.
And what I meant by women being higher quality in 2005 is that in 2005 I was still naive and I thought women were sent to us by God for us to try to win over. I didn't know any better and any woman that showed any interest in me was instantly put on a pedestal. Now that idea of a pedestal has been shattered, and I see myself as a MUCH more valuable person than I was 5 years.

Hence, my own conclusions and my own experience... but you are right, what is my life, does not others lives' make.

By overgeneralizing and making assumptions on the basis of your experience and what you read on this board, you are basically putting on sunglasses and then complain the world is darker!

Really think for a second. Did someone point a gun to your head and ordered you to marry, buy a house and have kids? Of course not! Are you going to be murdered now that you afre unplugged from the matrix and know the ugly truth? Of course not! Is a girl who flakes on a date a worthless low quality ho who has never done anything right in here life and never will do anything admirable until the day she dies? Of course not!

Put those sunglasses down and focus on the bright side of life. If you want to see stupid lying, flaking and cheating b*tches, you will see them, everywhere, all the time. If you want to see beautiful angels that will suck your d*ck twice a day and if you want to see a girls who pray to god every sunday that you and them will be together until the end of time and then live an eternal life of eating fruit, watching the NBA and butt seksing in paradise without ever hurting you once, you will find them to. Its just a matter of putting on the right glasses.
If heaven is watching the NBA, count me in.
And no, no one is pointing a gun to my head, but when you've been taught since a certain age that life follows a certain structure, you fall in line like a lemming, walking slowly towards it. All of a sudden, those mental conventions are broken and you are set free.

I didn't know any better 5 years ago, I know better now, and knowing is what gives me the power to CHOOSE.

And that's what I loved about this forum and life in general, I can now CHOOSE and not settle.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate women, I just hate the process itself and the games that come with it. I visit Loveshack every once in a while, and it just reminds me of how much BETTER of a person I've become and how the world isn't the perfect place I used to think it was and that no HUMAN being is flawless, man nor woman.

Still, there's nothing like enjoying a fine woman's anatomy.
And I DO focus on the bright side of life, which is why I am single and kidless and hope to stay that way. I have a good job and a bright future. Life IS good.

I, agree with you though, I'd honestly LOVE to see more posts from people with positive things to say, but most of the times, someone will chime in: "Oh, someone said that 5 years ago." Still, I don't think that should stop anyone from doing so. Like Warrior has told a few people here: Be the change you want to see.

If the posts of "improving oneself" have disappeared and have been replaced by posts of misogyny and misogamy, why not bring back posts of the former then? What's stopping us?


Do not subscribe to The SoSuave Newsletter unless you are already a chick magnet!

The information in each issue of The SoSuave Newsletter is too powerful for most guys to handle. If you are an ordinary guy, it is not for you. It is meant for the elite few. Not the unwashed masses.

If you know you can handle it...

If you already have girls calling you at all hours of the day and night, showing up at your door, throwing themselves at you everywhere you go...

Then sign up below.

But if you're just an average Joe, an ordinary guy, no one special – then skip this. It is not for you.


Don Juan
Mar 14, 2010
Reaction score
Oh yeah I'm still talking to women. It doesn't seem like I go very long without getting a date but still haven't found the one. Anyway I know what your going through, as I just went through the same thing. There is nothing wrong with you or with being a man. You need to be proud of who you are. Its not women who are at fault for your anger. All the anger in the world isn't gonna change who women are and they are just human beings like us just trying to get through this thing called life. Of course there are all kinds of women, even ones with bad intentions but those ones aren't worth your time. Women aren't gonna be the ones to approach us first, to them that's the mans job. When you think about it, what kind of man would you be if the woman takes the lead and initiates eveything. I realized after a while that I was wrong about my anger towards women and when I stopped letting there game bother me is when things started to change. Its all about acceptance dude! Don't worry you'll get there!


Master Don Juan
May 2, 2005
Reaction score
To OP:

You sound nuts. If I were a woman, I wouldnt want anything to do with you. No wonder you are bitter. Start rebuilding your life and get over the chip on shoulder.