Alright here's the truth, I'm 36 myself so read carefully. If I were to, God forbid, divorce my wife of 8.5 years or become a widower, meet a 28 y.o. woman who I had 'phenomenal sex' with for 6 solid months, I would (now read carefully),..
DO EXACTLY THE SAME THING THIS GUY IS DOING.
36 y.o., previously married guys are 100% aware of the game (or should be) at this point. We know the sex will drop off sharply after marriage, we've experienced this first hand (pun intended). We know that the relationship is as good as it will get while in this stage. We know that attractive 28 y.o. women are generally looking to cash their chips in for the security in marriage with a man they think will be a 'good provider' before the reach 30 themselves.
Stop swallowing the pop-psychology notion that men are 'afraid' of commitment. That's just NLP implying that men are really just silly immature boys, fearful of doing 'the right thing' and behaving as women think they should. Horsesh!t. We know that commitment equals responsibility, liability and accountability - financially, emotionally, family-wise, etc., blah, blah, blah,..Men (particularly divorced men) aren't afraid of commitment - we're cautious of it, we're aware of what it means to women and are righteously guarded of it because now we know what it really represents. We avoid it like a mine field at 36 and rather, can better appreciate the stages that lead up to the commitment ultimatum (that we know women will eventually come to) and try to enjoy and prolong it since we've come to expect that it will never get better than it is in this stage. We know full well that commitment is a Bait & Switch proposition at best and can now hold out long enough to enjoy ourselves, because we've experienced it.
This is the establishing operation that is at play with the guy you're so frustrated with. He may not elaborate it or state in the way I have, in fact that would only defeat his intent, but this is what's going on in his conditions and he's only responding pragmatically whether he's aware of it or not.
The problem isn't with him, it's with you. 6 months? 6 months! My God, you want the guy's commitment in just 6 months? Fvck him for at least a year an a half before you even think about whining. He's just rediscoving his own freedom after divorce and he's got you ready with a new set of handcuffs to snap on as soon as he's paid for the old ones to be unlocked. You are on his schedule, don't think for a second that you're entitled to his commitment and certainly not on your biological timer. The real problem is your own internalization of this pop-psychology myth, that men should grow up and commit to women. It becomes so frustrating and absorbing that women are unable to enjoy the honeymoon stages of a relationship (the part men understandably want to prolong) and think that the sooner they get to 'playing house' with a man the happier they'll be. Nonsense! Trust me, when you've got bills to pay, kids asses to wipe, he comes home after a 60 hour work week, you've put on 20 extra pounds and he tolerates still having sex with you when you're in the mood, you will wish you'd prolonged the pre-commitment single fvcking days.
