lets cut through all the garbage on sosuave---human relationships are dysfunctional

[orbit123]

Instead of creating thousands of posts on here, how come nobody mentions the elephant in the room. Female human and male human relationships from the beginning of time have been messed up. We are both at fault for this mess. On this site we like to pretend that men are perfect and women arent. Lets me real with ourselves and note the fact that both genders are flawed once we have relations with the other gender. And quit pretending on this site that having muscles will solve all your girl problems. We are in 2022, can we progress from the cave man thinking at least...

 

[Pierce.Manhammer]

No posters here worth reading believe that men are perfect. But this is a men's site dedicated to men being successful with women sexually. This site does have what does have participants referred to as black pill participants which tend to have a different bent than most DJ’s.

I see that you are relatively new to the site. Over time you will find out that your view of most posters' beliefs is incorrect.

 

[jimwho]

I'll cut through the garbage. Not all relationships are dysfunctional.

 

[Smok1nAce]

How many post do you see on here weekly of a guy trying to text his way into some womens pants, like if he says the right thing the prize is unlocked like a video game. Or trying to figure out the phsycology of why a women is treating him a certain way. Or convinced if you haven't slept with a certain amount of women your completely worthless. Or if the women hasn't slept with you after 3 dates she worthless and so are you. Or that 20% of the men are having sx with 80% of the women.


Human interactions aren't dysfunctional, their is just a generation of men who grew up with the wrong idea when it comes to women. Its hard to realize a world without the interent or social media but before these things It took months and years to develop relationships with people.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

I wouldn't simplify it and label it "human interactions" are dysfunctional but I definitely see your point. I'd just say there are gaps and fault lines in human-to-human connection. That is more evident in intergender dynamics.

No side is at fault per se, it is a combination of many factors and let's just say this "virus" only augmented and magnified this "disconnect" which serves a specific purpose for those pulling the strings.

But as it relates to dating, there are simply way too many social constructs and negative social belief systems that only seek self-fulfillment. Civilization has become more and more self-centered and dating is a prime example of this where women seek attention -> validation, and men seek sex -> unload. Rarely nowadays do you come across people seeking to build something of substance and a sense of commitment to each other at the human level (beyond the physical connection between a penis and a vagina).

Anyway, I can be wrong about my views but that's what I believe as of now.

Modern Man Advice

 

[Pierce.Manhammer]

+1

I wouldn't simplify it and label it "human interactions" are dysfunctional but I definitely see your point. I'd just say there are gaps and fault lines in human-to-human connection. That is more evident in intergender dynamics.

No side is at fault per see, it is a combination of many factors and let's just say this "virus" only augmented and magnified this "disconnect" which serves a specific purpose for those pulling the strings.

But as it relates to dating, there are simply way too many social constructs and negative social belief systems that only seek self-fulfillment. Civilization has become more and more self-centered and dating is a prime example of this where women seek attention -> validation, and men seek sex -> unload. Rarely nowadays do you come across people seeking to build something of substance and a sense of commitment to each other at the human level (beyond the physical connection between a penis and a vagina).

Anyway, I can be wrong about my views but that's what I believe as of now.

Modern Man Advice

 

[kavi]

The problem is Marriage.

We need to move away from the Marriage system asap. Live like animals cos we need to go back to basics. When something is as broken as this, you cant keep patching it up, you need to get rid of all social constructs (marriage etc) and go back to basics. Talking, interaction, sex, start with those things and then build up to ltrs, children etc.

Things are currently messed up because we are following aspects of both Patriarchy (Marriage, Man pays, woman is an object) and non-Patriarchy (women can sleep with anyone, have kids with anyone, are independant etc).

So women have too many benefits, they have more power today then ever before, but it will shortlived. The reason is women are still getting the benefits of marriage, men paying, ltrs etc (patriarchy) but dont actually submit or follow an actual patrirachal system.

Traditional Patriarchy: where women submitted to their husbands, were payed for, didnt make drama or have too much freedom, their value was an object - Things were fine and there was no problems in this system.

Non-Patriarchal Free System (No marriage, no payment from men to women, women are not objects hence have no intrinsic value and are judged on behaviour): This is the system of Animals today, and maybe some far off tribes, but look at animals there are no problems in 'relationships' things work pretty well according to their own systems, the female normally breeds with the best male she can find.

But we are only having issues in our society because women have that status of objects, they get marriage etc which comes from Patriarchy but are not actually in a Patriarchal system where women obey. So we need to remove the concept of Marriage and never give a woman anything in exchange for a relationship.

 

[BadBoy89]

Great post by Kavi.

Ties in to above, but would just add giving women sexual freedom has destroyed relationships and made men confused. If women HAD to be virgins before marriage, men would not be so confused about how to act with women. But the fact that hot looking women can have sex with anyone they chose? Creates big problems as well.

 

[Kotaix]

If male-female relationships were historically as bad as you say they are, there would be no people. I don't know who likes to pretend that men are perfect, but if they do, that is delusional thinking.

 

[bmp2cpm]

The problem is Marriage.

We need to move away from the Marriage system asap. Live like animals cos we need to go back to basics. When something is as broken as this, you cant keep patching it up, you need to get rid of all social constructs (marriage etc) and go back to basics. Talking, interaction, sex, start with those things and then build up to ltrs, children etc.

Things are currently messed up because we are following aspects of both Patriarchy (Marriage, Man pays, woman is an object) and non-Patriarchy (women can sleep with anyone, have kids with anyone, are independant etc).

So women have too many benefits, they have more power today then ever before, but it will shortlived. The reason is women are still getting the benefits of marriage, men paying, ltrs etc (patriarchy) but dont actually submit or follow an actual patrirachal system.

Traditional Patriarchy: where women submitted to their husbands, were payed for, didnt make drama or have too much freedom, their value was an object - Things were fine and there was no problems in this system.

Non-Patriarchal Free System (No marriage, no payment from men to women, women are not objects hence have no intrinsic value and are judged on behaviour): This is the system of Animals today, and maybe some far off tribes, but look at animals there are no problems in 'relationships' things work pretty well according to their own systems, the female normally breeds with the best male she can find.

But we are only having issues in our society because women have that status of objects, they get marriage etc which comes from Patriarchy but are not actually in a Patriarchal system where women obey. So we need to remove the concept of Marriage and never give a woman anything in exchange for a relationship.

No thanks, I’ll keep my traditional marriage.

Women can be taught ad nauseam to attack the patriarchy. But biologically they are literally programmed to want to be led by a strong man.

Yes, the current environment is extremely challenging for single men, but it is not impossible. Biology will never change no matter how much a woman will rationalize things.

Things are out of control because men gave up leading, men stopped caring about women’s high partner count, men forgave women when they cheated on them, and men publicly started to apologize for being a man.

And most importantly, men stopped calling out women when they did something clearly wrong for fear of being shamed. Pretty much an entire generation of men were trained to be AFC.

Men fear being shamed by women. Men fear failing with women. We all have failures in life. How you handle failures in life will determine how you succeed in the future.

The best women are younger, shorter, and earn less than you. Miss any of these big three and you are in for a bumpy ride. Miss all three and the relationship is doomed.

 

[kavi]

No thanks, I’ll keep my traditional marriage.

Women can be taught ad nauseam to attack the patriarchy. But biologically they are literally programmed to want to be led by a strong man.

Yes, the current environment is extremely challenging for single men, but it is not impossible. Biology will never change no matter how much a woman will rationalize things.

Things are out of control because men gave up leading, men stopped caring about women’s high partner count, men forgave women when they cheated on them, and men publicly started to apologize for being a man.

And most importantly, men stopped calling out women when they did something clearly wrong for fear of being shamed. Pretty much an entire generation of men were trained to be AFC.

Men fear being shamed by women. Men fear failing with women. We all have failures in life. How you handle failures in life will determine how you succeed in the future.

The best women are younger, shorter, and earn less than you. Miss any of these big three and you are in for a bumpy ride. Miss all three and the relationship is doomed.

Most men cant lead modern independant women. Leading women is like leading people in general, it can only be done by 'Alpha Males'. That might be 1 in 10 or 1 in 20 guys in real life. Back in the day any tom **** or harry with a job (farming, factory, whatever) could marry and have a wife of his own. This was a legal thing and women couldnt really step out of this system.

But why should every guy have a wife and kids of his own. That seems like a dysgenic system, certainly not eugenic.

Yeah women are gonna be led by men, but not by every man. Men are not equal and getting women is meant to be competitive, so monogamy doesnt make sense.

The marriage system will collapse cos hypergamy is real and women dont wanna belong to loser guys with beer bellies. Monogamy was a man made system, it will die, and our modern concept of marriage is basically based on monogamy.

Take the best guy you know and the worst guy you know, back in the day each man had a wife, in future the better guy will have 2 and the other nothing.

When you remove monogamy and the concept of marriage, women become a lot more humble. In the current Monogamous marriage system women can simply 'win' too much, ie getting married to rich alpha male attractive dream guy and having him all to herself. That is a big win for a woman. In the future that top guy will have multiple wives so no woman will ever get so much from a relationship so there egos will need to drop.

A womans 'relationship value' drops once you remove marriage and monogamy.

 

[Howiestern]

The problem is Marriage.

We need to move away from the Marriage system asap. Live like animals cos we need to go back to basics. When something is as broken as this, you cant keep patching it up, you need to get rid of all social constructs (marriage etc) and go back to basics. Talking, interaction, sex, start with those things and then build up to ltrs, children etc.

Things are currently messed up because we are following aspects of both Patriarchy (Marriage, Man pays, woman is an object) and non-Patriarchy (women can sleep with anyone, have kids with anyone, are independant etc).

So women have too many benefits, they have more power today then ever before, but it will shortlived. The reason is women are still getting the benefits of marriage, men paying, ltrs etc (patriarchy) but dont actually submit or follow an actual patrirachal system.

Traditional Patriarchy: where women submitted to their husbands, were payed for, didnt make drama or have too much freedom, their value was an object - Things were fine and there was no problems in this system.

Non-Patriarchal Free System (No marriage, no payment from men to women, women are not objects hence have no intrinsic value and are judged on behaviour): This is the system of Animals today, and maybe some far off tribes, but look at animals there are no problems in 'relationships' things work pretty well according to their own systems, the female normally breeds with the best male she can find.

But we are only having issues in our society because women have that status of objects, they get marriage etc which comes from Patriarchy but are not actually in a Patriarchal system where women obey. So we need to remove the concept of Marriage and never give a woman anything in exchange for a relationship.

But when we get back to basics and live like animals the top men have all the women. The 80/20 rule applies. The concept of marriage in the 1950's and 60's helped less desirable males secure and keep women. Many women stayed in unhappy marriages because society told them they had to and they had no job to finance their life outside of marriage. As the sacrament of marriage eroded there was nothing to keep the women in Check. We gave power to women they never had before. Now they have full rein and support at all levels. they can do no wrong. it's times like this we see men struggling the most.

 

[Howiestern]

When you remove monogamy and the concept of marriage, women become a lot more humble.

But we have removed monagamy and marriage.....I hardly think women are humble. They almost have new powers they never had before. You put women in check with social constructs. We erased all of those several years ago.

 

[kavi]

But when we get back to basics and live like animals the top men have all the women. The 80/20 rule applies. The concept of marriage in the 1950's and 60's helped less desirable males secure and keep women. Many women stayed in unhappy marriages because society told them they had to and they had no job to finance their life outside of marriage. As the sacrament of marriage eroded there was nothing to keep the women in Check. We gave power to women they never had before. Now they have full rein and support at all levels. they can do no wrong. it's times like this we see men struggling the most.

If you go into a market where workers are working for a pittance, and you as a worker are unwilling to accept that, then you have no option but to disengage from that market. In todays world there are still men playing into womens ego by providing money, simping etc, so those guys are the problem and while they exist women will continue to hold on to their power.

All a high quality man can do is look to 'break' women so their egos and power are recalibrated. But it takes a long time and a lot of work for a guy to bring a woman down and make her humble and sincere.

But most of womens ego is just a front because in reality they are very unhappy and losing big time. It is just a matter of time before things change and women go back to their natural level of sincerity. This is not about women being humble and obedient an average husband like in the marriage system but women need to be humble to the top 20% of men.

The system of monogamy was created so no man can rise above and challenge the state or the king. Monogamy is created to keep good men down, it hurts good men and in reality women also as it reduces the number of available high quality men. Monogamy means there is no point in a man being very good cos at most he will only get 1 woman so men are limited in their power, influence and greatness.

For sure some people will want to go back to the traditional marriage system whereas I believe in the 'Communal' system. We should be free to self-organise and make these competing systems to see which one works better and can learn from each.

But we have removed monagamy and marriage.....I hardly think women are humble. They almost have new powers they never had before. You put women in check with social constructs. We erased all of those several years ago.

Polygamy is still not a social norm and women still want marriage and are being offered it by most men so I dont think this is accurate.

Men really need to think about why they want to live with a women, share a bedroom, bathroom, chores, financial responsibilites etc cos none of this is romantic or enjoyable, so there needs to be another way for men to live that is socially acceptable and enjoyable. At the moment women can and do live on their own without marriage and they have big support networks, siblings, friends, parents etc but for men outside of marriage it seems there is still no good options to live without loneliness, so this needs to change.

 

[BadBoy89]

But as it relates to dating, there are simply way too many social constructs and negative social belief systems that only seek self-fulfillment. Civilization has become more and more self-centered and dating is a prime example of this where women seek attention -> validation, and men seek sex -> unload. Rarely nowadays do you come across people seeking to build something of substance and a sense of commitment to each other at the human level (beyond the physical connection between a penis and a vagina).

I believe when men are younger, they definitely want to build substance with the young girl; while young women don‘t. When men are older, they don’t want to build substance with the older woman, but older woman do.

In a way it’s not worth it for a man to build something of substance with a woman when the whole system is against the man for existing or wanting sex.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I believe when men are younger, they definitely want to build substance with the young girl; while young women don‘t. When men are older, they don’t want to build substance with the older woman, but older woman do.

In a way it’s not worth it for a man to build something of substance with a woman when the whole system is against the man for existing or wanting sex.

"The whole system" - it surely can feel that way. But you know how these women are, once you have one then you can have several.

 

[Pandora]

The problem is Marriage.

We need to move away from the Marriage system asap. Live like animals cos we need to go back to basics. When something is as broken as this, you cant keep patching it up, you need to get rid of all social constructs (marriage etc) and go back to basics. Talking, interaction, sex, start with those things and then build up to ltrs, children etc.

Things are currently messed up because we are following aspects of both Patriarchy (Marriage, Man pays, woman is an object) and non-Patriarchy (women can sleep with anyone, have kids with anyone, are independant etc).

So women have too many benefits, they have more power today then ever before, but it will shortlived. The reason is women are still getting the benefits of marriage, men paying, ltrs etc (patriarchy) but dont actually submit or follow an actual patrirachal system.

Traditional Patriarchy: where women submitted to their husbands, were payed for, didnt make drama or have too much freedom, their value was an object - Things were fine and there was no problems in this system.

Non-Patriarchal Free System (No marriage, no payment from men to women, women are not objects hence have no intrinsic value and are judged on behaviour): This is the system of Animals today, and maybe some far off tribes, but look at animals there are no problems in 'relationships' things work pretty well according to their own systems, the female normally breeds with the best male she can find.

But we are only having issues in our society because women have that status of objects, they get marriage etc which comes from Patriarchy but are not actually in a Patriarchal system where women obey. So we need to remove the concept of Marriage and never give a woman anything in exchange for a relationship.

Gold 100% agree. I have preached this before. We can do the tribe thing or the civilization thing. We can't do both.

If we do civilization we HAVE to control the women for societies own good. If we do the tribal unit thing ( in which we were all happier) we will not have civilization but we won't have to control the women. Women are basically community puzzy and paternity is shared among 150 or so people.

What we have now is the worst of both worlds.

 

[Pandora]

Instead of creating thousands of posts on here, how come nobody mentions the elephant in the room. Female human and male human relationships from the beginning of time have been messed up. We are both at fault for this mess. On this site we like to pretend that men are perfect and women arent. Lets me real with ourselves and note the fact that both genders are flawed once we have relations with the other gender. And quit pretending on this site that having muscles will solve all your girl problems. We are in 2022, can we progress from the cave man thinking at least...

On SS we like to pretend that men are perfect. About 50% of men are weirdos. Many of them are insecure and socially maladapted. Many of them are unmotivated to self improve..many are not very bright etc.

We blame women for not looking in the mirror but we do that same thing (at a lesser rate). The reason many women don't respect men is because many men are not worthy of respect. Look at some of the weirdos on this forum. Look at all the simps and soy boys out there.


So when they encounter an actual good man they don't know what to do with him.

Women are trash and men are trash. The trash women loves the trash men. You would be surprised how many men love for their woman to take care of them and but them stuff .

 

[kavi]

Gold 100% agree. I have preached this before. We can do the tribe thing or the civilization thing. We can't do both.

If we do civilization we HAVE to control the women for societies own good. If we do the tribal unit thing ( in which we were all happier) we will not have civilization but we won't have to control the women. Women are basically community puzzy and paternity is shared among 150 or so people.

What we have now is the worst of both worlds.

I disagree only on the point that we cant have 'Civilization' in the Communal system. The Communal system can better organise skills and resources at a local level and women being more free they can 'reward' good men who contribute and do well for the community with love and sex.

 

[LARaiders85]

Instead of creating thousands of posts on here, how come nobody mentions the elephant in the room. Female human and male human relationships from the beginning of time have been messed up. We are both at fault for this mess. On this site we like to pretend that men are perfect and women arent. Lets me real with ourselves and note the fact that both genders are flawed once we have relations with the other gender. And quit pretending on this site that having muscles will solve all your girl problems. We are in 2022, can we progress from the cave man thinking at least...

We all grew up around and had exposure to at least a few healthy relationships.